Remember Me
by EmbryCrumbleCakes
Summary: ON HIATUS. Quil and Claire are finally starting to move into the romantic phase of the Imprint when a terrible accident leaves Quil unaware of their mystical bond. How will Claire make him remember a love that is once in a lifetime? Quil/Claire Rated M
1. Perfect Two

**A/N**: Hi! I don't know what the interest level really is for Twilight fanfiction right now…I feel like I'm a little late jumping on the bandwagon! But regardless, I feel like writing and if any readers enjoy it that's a plus. This story is rated M for language, violence, and sexuality. Nothing too dark, but I like to be safe. This story will be mainly from Claire's POV though I may do a few chapters in Quil's POV later on.

_Also_: I am really influenced by music and will be naming each chapter after a song that I get inspiration from. I will include a snippet of the lyrics that inspired me at the beginning of the chapter too. I may also include a link to a youtube playlist of the songs I use if anyone is interested. Okay long author's note is over I promise!

Happy reading! :)

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><p><strong><em>Remember Me<em>**

**Chapter 1: Perfect Two**

_Cause you're the one for me  
>And I'm the one for you<br>You take the both of us _  
><em>And we're the perfect two<em>

_-_Perfect Two by Auburn

I didn't want to go home. Going home meant trying to fall asleep in my cold, narrow bed alone. Without _Quil. _If only he would let me stay a little longer, I could pretend I was too tired to make the short journey back to my house. I just needed to distract him for a little while more…

"Claire. I think it's time for you to head back." Quil's deep voice permeated my thoughts. I glanced up at him and frowned when I noticed his teasing grin.

"But _Quil _it's only 10:30!"

"It's a school night remember? I know how you need your beauty sleep."

I couldn't help the annoyed huff that escaped my lips. "But I absolutely hate school."

Of course I remembered there was school tomorrow. School was pretty much the bane of my teenage existence. Was I a tad dramatic? _Yes_, but then again what's life without a little drama? Quil reached across the coffee table where a mess of cards were strewn about—the aftermath of our intense game of Speed—and pinched my cheek.

"Oh Claire-bear you're so darn cute when you whine.

_Urghh. _I was hoping he would think of me as more of the sexy, sultry type. Claire-bear and cute were not what I was going for these days. I scowled and slapped his gigantic, albeit _perfect _hand away from me.

"I thought you agreed that when I turned seventeen you would come up with a new, grown-up nickname for me. Like Cece or Claire-divine!"

Quil snorted. "Claire-_divine_? Seriously?"

I couldn't keep myself from matching his adorable grin. He was too damn cute for his own good. "Well…" I continued, "There's always _Claire-with-the-amazing-derriere_. Kind of a ring to it don't you think?"

Quil's booming laugh was the only response I got. Mission accomplished. He was as distracted as ever and the night was getting darker. Only a half hour or so longer and I could feign tiredness and hopefully end up tucked into Quil's bed where I wanted to be. Hell, Quil's bed was where any hot-blooded teenage girl would want to be. I let out a sigh as I imagined what sort of mischief we could get into if I actually ended up there.

"Uhh Claire?"

_Shit. Quil-fantasies are for alone time, remember?_ "Ye-yea?"

Quil raised a perfectly arched brown eyebrow at me. "Why are you blushing like that?"

_Because I'm imagining you having your dirty way with me?_ "It's you know…really uh _hot_ in here." Quil stared at me like I was crazy. "I mean maybe we should turn on a fan or something?" I concluded lamely.

Quil shrugged. "As you command _Claire-divine_."

I smiled weakly, still embarrassed at being caught fantasizing about him. Not that he knew I was thinking about him in that way of course.

"Hope this cools you down." The faint breeze of a fan hit my face as Quil plopped it down on the table in front of me with a devilish grin on his face. And if that wasn't enough, he winked before moving back to his side of the table.

I pretty much died. So maybe he _did_ know what I was thinking.

"Thanks." I cringed at how high pitched my voice sounded. "You know, we could play another game if you want?"

Quil eyed me across the table and smirked. It made me want to rip his clothes off. Good thing I had self-control huh?

"Claire, you're not fooling anyone. It's time to go home."

"But Quil—"

"Nope. School night means early night!"

I sighed dramatically, but knew I had lost. Quil could be such a fucking _mom_ when he wanted to be. I mean, I knew he was technically more than a decade older than me, but physically and let's face it, _mentally_ he was barely past twenty. That meant we should be equals right?

I watched as Quil lifted himself off the floor and couldn't prevent the sharp intake of breath when his shirt rode up a little, exposing his lower abdominal muscles. _Must. Prevent. Drool. From. Escaping._ His large hand suddenly appeared in front of my face and I stared at it like a moron.

"C'mon Claire-bear, I'll take you home."

Finally I began processing thoughts through my mashed-potato brain. I grabbed his hand and was pulled to my feet as if I weighed no more than a little kid. Not that I was large or anything, but still. Quil's wolf-man strength was still surprising sometimes. And also _hot_.

I didn't let go of Quil's hand as I brought my face closer to his. "I'm just so thankful I have you to watch out for my academic well-being. I mean what would I do without you?"

Quil smiled impishly down at me. "Oh you'd be fine. A brain-dead drop-out maybe, but totally fine."

"Well without _me_ you would probably be Embry's girlfriend by now. I mean you guys are just so _cute _together—_Quil!_"

I was suddenly hanging upside down with Quil's arms wrapped securely around my upper thighs. Fortunately for me this resulted in a wonderful vantage point to view his once again slightly exposed six-pack up close.

_Holy crap. So this is what heaven will be like…_

Before I could reach out and touch or y'know maybe innocently, and of course _accidently_ lick Quil's stomach, he wiggled me around. "Take it back or you'll be staying this way for the rest of the night."

_Was that a promise?_

"Just because you can't admit your love for Embry doesn't mean you have to take it out on poor, innocent me!"

Quil laughed and flipped me over until I was facing him. Instinctively I wrapped my legs around his waist and gripped his broad shoulders for support.

"This is why you need to stay in school. Your young brain still has so much developing to do. Can't even understand the mature, completely _heterosexual_ relationship I have with my pack brothers."

"Mature? You just hung me upside down like I was a baby orangutan!" I was grinning like a fool, but I didn't care. Being so physically close to Quil would probably be the highlight of my week.

"Well you do kind of look like one don't you?"

I pulled my best monkey face and elicited some very unmanly giggles from Quil. "I think I'm more the chimpanzee-type, but whatever you say…"

Quil looked at me with his characteristic warm, adoring expression that I knew he reserved just for me. I wanted to sigh in pleasure when he tucked a stray piece of hair behind my ear. "Claire you know you don't look anything like a monkey."

"But you just said—"

He chuckled. "I just think you're capable of making some of the weirdest expressions I have ever seen on a human face, but that's as far as it goes in terms of monkey-resemblance."

"You have such a way with flattery." I let out an overly-dramatic swoon for effect.

"I'm so glad you think so." He winked for the second time that night and I realized I was in serious danger of going into some form of cardiac arrest. _Damn his stupid sexy wolf winks. _

Quil must have felt my sudden increase in heart-rate seeing as our chests were only inches from touching and his eyes widened a little.

_Uh-oh. Time's up._

Quil cleared his throat. "Well…uh I think you've dragged this out long enough. Let's get going."

He slowly began to release his grip on my legs and I unhooked them from around his waist. I just couldn't help that I slid as slowly and as closely down the length of his body before my feet hit the floor though. I may have been imagining it, but it sounded as if his breath hitched when I came into contact with a certain region of his anatomy.

_1 point for Claire-bear. _

"Ok fine. Let's go Cruella de-Quil." I grinned cheekily and started to walk toward the door. I could sense him following close behind me.

He held the door open as I walked through. "You know I hate that nickname. And that stupid Dalmatian movie."

I gasped in mock horror as we made our way toward his pick-up truck. "One hundred and one Dalmatians is a Disney _classic_!"

"Dalmatians are lame and they don't _do_ anything. Like can they even kill shit?"

"They're dogs not wolves Quil."

"Obviously." He smirked as he started up the truck and began the short drive down the road to my house. I couldn't help, but smile contentedly. Things always felt so right when I was with Quil. My protector, my best friend, and maybe sometime soon, he would be more than that.

I glanced over at him. "Quil?"

"Yea?"

"You're y'know, my imprint right?"

Quil stiffened a little before responding. "Yea you know that Claire."

Quil had told me about imprinting on my sixteenth birthday. About how he we were connected by some mythical bond thing that made him want to constantly protect me and be my friend forever. He hadn't elaborated much beyond that, but I knew that imprinting wasn't strictly platonic. Sam and Emily, Paul and Rachel, Jared and Kim…they were all evidence of that.

After repeatedly asking Emily about it she had finally caved and told me that imprinting meant that Quil and I could eventually have a romantic relationship if we wanted it. But only if I wanted it to happen. Otherwise we could just stay friends forever.

I never discussed it much with Quil because I was afraid it would freak him out and he would treat me like I was that little brat in the 4th grade again which just plain sucked. But that didn't mean I didn't think about when the time would come that Quil would become more than just my best friend. Hell, I thought about it constantly these days. Hence this ill-timed, awkward conversation I was currently engaging in.

"Well, I just was wondering something about imprinting."

Quil's grip on the steering wheel visibly tightened. He seemed nervous, which was in turn making _me_ nervous. "What do you want to know?"

_What the fuck __**did**__ I want to know? _

"Uh…well…" A million questions flooded my brain.

_Do you think of me as a soulmate? Do you love me—not like how you normally say you love me, but like are you __**in**__ love with me? Do you think I'm sexy like I think you're sexy? Do you want to have some cuddly half-wolf babies with me?_

Thank god none of that actually came out of my mouth. Instead I played it safe. "I thought being your imprint meant that I can tell you what to do and you'll listen to me. But here I am forced to go home early and attend seven hours of the most boring classes known to man."

Quil finally appeared to relax. "Imprinting means that I keep your best interests in mind. However, sometimes your best interests are not in line with what you want to do."

He looked over at me grinning. "Like skipping school for example. Obviously, it would be wrong of me to deny you the privilege of getting an education."

"God then what is the point of being an imprint if I don't get _anything_ out of it?"

"Well you get _me_ so I think that's fair enough."

I tried to laugh as if I thought it was all just one big funny joke, but my body warmed at the unintended connotation of his words. I got _him._ I GOT QUIL ATEARA. Imprinting was kind of amazing really.

All too soon I heard the familiar crunch of gravel as we pulled up into my short driveway. I glanced at the small, faded blue house and noticed a light on in the living room. My older sister Riley was home and likely watching another episode of Keeping Up With the Kardashians or Jersey Shore or whatever useless, pathetic crap that she called television was on at this time.

"Goodnight Claire. I'll pick you up from school tomorrow if you want?"

I brightened up considerably at the suggestion. "Really? That would be great."

"Okay then. I'll see you at 2:30." Quil reached over and pulled me into his side for a brief hug. I breathed in his woodsy scent as deeply as I could. It would have to last me for another 14 hours or so.

"Night Quil. Love you."

He squeezed me even tighter. "Love you too Claire-bear."

I hopped out of the passenger side and made my way into the house. Sure enough, Riley was lounging out on the sofa, painting her nails some deep violet color, while her eyes stayed glued to the TV. Oh the joys of being a 21-year-old, already graduated from high-school.

"Can you take the trash out Claire? I don't want to ruin my nails."

I groaned. "I just got home Ry! Couldn't you have done it earlier?"

She unlocked her gaze from the TV long enough to glare at me. "Well maybe if I wasn't slaving away at the clinic, I would have had time. Just like you have time to hang out with Quil constantly and I don't say anything about it."

Guilt rushed through me as I realized the truth of her words. Riley had sacrificed a lot so that I didn't have to work a job while in high school. Ever since our parents had died in a car accident five years ago Riley gave up her dreams of college to stay in La Push with me. Initially we had lived with my Aunt Emily and Uncle Sam, but Riley grew tired of what she called "mooching off of our relatives" and decided we needed to make it on our own. The small two bedroom cottage that my parents had kept in La Push for use during the summer months became our permanent home and my sister started working as a medical assistant at the health clinic on the reservation to help pay the bills.

"You're right. I'll do it." After finishing up with the trash, I went back to my room for the night. As I lay in bed, I couldn't keep my thoughts from drifting to Quil.

What was he doing right now? Probably eating for the millionth time that day. I stifled a giggle as I imagined him slathering peanut butter and jelly on top of Ego waffles as he was known to do.

_It tastes delicious_! He would tell me when I pulled my gag face. Sure. Just like when he told me that dill pickle slices plus scrambled eggs and barbecue sauce on toast made a tasty snack. I started calling him Quil-pickles after that incident.

And yet weird wolf eating habits aside, he was the most amazing best friend I could ever ask for. Quil almost never asked me what was wrong because he just _knew_ from my facial expression. Quil played Speed and Slapjack and Egyptian Ratscrew with me for hours just because he knew I had a borderline crazy competitive streak that would not be satiated until I had beaten him at least once in each game. Quil pushed me to do my homework and study, but then picked out the best action movies to watch once I had exerted my brain enough for the day.

Quil was _perfect_ for me.

And I was in love with him.

If only he would freaking admit he loved me too, then we could play strip poker instead of slapjack. I'm sure my competitive nature would go well with that sort of activity.

I indulged in that little fantasy scenario for about 20 minutes before I decided it was time to formulate a plan of action. The objective was simple enough: get Quil to admit that he wanted to kiss me as badly as I wanted to do the same to him. And then make him act on that urge. However, the method of getting Mr. Overprotective Quil-pickle to stop seeing me as fucking Claire-bear was not so simple.

He would probably just look at me like I was crazy and tell me it was "in my best interest" to stop dry humping his leg. Which I would so totally do. I mean have you _seen_ Quil's leg?

Regardless I made a vow to myself before I drifted off to sleep that tomorrow would be the day I did something about the fact that I was completely in love with my best friend. Tomorrow we would start the romantic-soulmate phase of our imprint.

_That's the spirit. Quil won't know what hit him!_

Too bad I had no clue that tomorrow was the day fate would royally screw mine and Quil's lives over. Silly Claire-bear.

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><p><strong>AN: **Sooo what did you guys think? I would love to hear from you! This is my first attempt at a multi-chapter fic so any advice and constructive criticism would be great! THANK YOU :)


	2. A Little Too Much

**A/N:** Thanks to all who reviewed the first chapter! I hope you enjoy this next one :)

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><p><strong>Chapter 2: A Little Too Much<strong>

_Everybody hurts just a little too much  
>Everybody hurts but it's never enough<br>It's wonderful to fall, let's love and risk it all  
>I'd rather love just a little too much<em>

_-_A Little Too Much by Natasha Bedingfield

2:20 PM.

10 more tortuous minutes before class was over and I could see Quil. I had suffered through an entire school day without him, but the thought of even waiting just 10 more minutes seemed unimaginable.

_Ughh. Does he feel this way too? _

I ran my hand over the sheet of notebook paper that I had been scribbling on for the past 40 minutes. Notes for class possibly? Of course not. _That_ would be too damn productive for me. Instead I had spent the class period substituting Quil's name into the titles of movies that I thought of.

_Good Quil Hunting_

_House on Haunted Quil_

_What's Eating Quil-bert Grape_

I could go on for hours. Obsessed much?

"So how about…Claire? Did you pick out any interesting symbolism in the last chapter?"

My teacher Mr. Trombley was staring at me with a friendly smile. _Fuck_. Unless he was interested in hearing about the symbolism of Quil's ass I was not going to be very helpful in this class discussion.

"Well, I uh didn't really find anything actually."

Mr. Trombley frowned before moving on to another student. I don't know why I let Quil coax me into taking Honors English for my last class period of the day. I was suffering from an acute case of senioritis and should have been enrolled in Advanced Daydreaming instead. At least my talent for Quil-obsessing would come in handy in a class like that.

Now where was I…

_To Quil a Mockingbird _

_A Time to Quil_

_There Quil Will Blood_

_RINGGGG!_ Finally the bell signaled the end of my torture and I practically ran out of the classroom. It wasn't my fault that I couldn't pay attention, I blamed the imprint. I couldn't bear the thought of Quil likely _suffering_ outside as he waited for me. Okay so I might have been grasping at straws with that excuse, but I did know Quil was impatient. And who was I to make him wait any longer than he had to?

I grabbed a few books from my locker and stuffed them hastily into my backpack before slamming the door. I had only taken a few steps toward the exit leading out into the parking lot when I felt a hand on my arm.

"Hey Claire, wait up."

I turned around and was surprised to see my friend Nathan from Calculus class staring at me.

_What does he want?_

Nathan and I got along well due to the fact that we had been sitting next each other for months now. Interaction outside of the classroom was not really normal for us however.

I eyed him skeptically. "Uhh yea?"

Nathan released my arm, but remained close. "I was wondering if you wanted to go get ice cream? I know you don't have a car so I was thinking I could drive us. Y'know if you want to, that is."

I was confused by his sudden desire to hang out, but tried not to let that show on my face. I smiled brightly.

"Well thanks for the offer, but I actually have a ride today so maybe another time."

I hadn't even realized it, but I had already started walking toward the exit. Toward _Quil_. Nathan was following alongside me and I noticed his expression falter a little.

"Oh okay. For sure sometime soon then."

He held the door for me as we walked out into the parking lot. My eyes immediately began scanning for the person I had been thinking about nearly all day.

"Yea ,sure. Another time." I absentmindedly responded. _What were we even discussing again?_

Finally my eyes found what they had been searching for. Quil's truck was parked a few spots away and I could see the outline of his giant form through the side window.

"Okay I'll talk to you later then Claire."

Nathan's voice came from behind me as I had already started moving away from him. I managed to smile and wave at him from over my shoulder.

"Yep bye."

Now free of any distraction, my legs crossed the short distance in a manner of seconds. As I approached the truck, the side door opened and I hopped inside already bubbling with happiness. The second I laid eyes on Quil's grinning face I sighed. It was like I had finally gotten the fix I had been craving all day.

"How was school Claire-bear?"

I grabbed his hand and held it. "Horrible. I missed you the entire time."

Quil chuckled, but his grin widened with what appeared to be pride. "It was only a few hours you know."

"Don't act like you didn't miss me all day too!" I squeezed his warm hand even tighter, relishing in the contact. Quil sighed and squeezed back.

"You know me too well."

I smiled at him and relaxed into the seat. The ride was short and soon enough we were pulling into the drive leading up to my house. Riley's car was gone and I knew she would be at work for at least 2 more hours.

I turned my attention to Quil. "Do you have to patrol tonight? I hope not because Riley rented the new Paranormal Activity movie and I want to watch it with someone that will actually let me claw off their arm when a scary part comes up!"

Quil laughed remembering the last time I had watched a horror movie with Riley. I had ended up practically in her lap freaking out. Let's just say she was not amused.

"Nope, no patrol tonight. My arm is all yours." My heartbeat accelerated as I imagined what other body parts could be all mine if Quil wanted them to be.

_Mind out of the gutter Claire._

"Great." I croaked out.

We made our way inside and eventually ended up side-by-side on the couch as the movie began. After approximately 10 minutes I was already curled up against Quil's side clutching his t-shirt nervously. Not that he seemed to mind though. Quil's arm was wrapped around me and he ran his hand soothingly down my arm.

"Are you sure you can handle this Claire? The movie like just started and you're already starting to freak out."

Quil's brown eyes were glinting with amusement and I tried my best to glare at him. It was hard though when he looked so adorable all the time.

"Oh please. I'm not 10 years old anymore. I mean it's not even that—HOLY SHIT!"

A particularly frightening scene had me launching myself onto Quil's lap and burying my face into his chest. My position allowed me to feel him shaking with laughter.

"Wow. Totally not scared, huh?" The deep timbre of Quil's voice reverberated throughout my body and I suddenly wasn't afraid of the movie anymore. I was now more concerned about my damn hormones threatening to take over my brain and my self-control.

_DANGER. DANGER. RED ALERT. This close contact is too much for Claire-bear to handle! _

Quil's hands rubbed comforting circles on my back and I couldn't stop myself from inhaling deeply to breathe in the scent of him. Lifting my head up slightly, I stared into his eyes that were crinkled from laughing. I was suddenly reminded of the plan I had made yesterday while attempting to fall asleep. The plan to start a new phase of our imprint, a _romantic_ phase.

_Will he let me?_

I must have had a strange expression on my face because Quil's eyes slowly lost their mirth and began to narrow in focus.

"What is it?"

I gulped loudly in response. I wanted to kiss him so badly. All I had to do was lean in a few more inches and it could be a reality.

"Do you ever think about me as more than just—you know _just_ _me_?" Oh god I was babbling.

Quil's brow furrowed. "That made absolutely no sense."

I struggled to continue. "I mean like not as your friend?"

"But Claire you know you'll _always_ be my friend. What are you trying to say?" He was smiling slightly now and looking at me as if I was a little kid who was asking stupid questions again.

"No you don't get it. I mean…what I want to say is…is…"

The words just wouldn't come out. In his attempt to figure out what was going on in my muddled brain Quil had leaned his face even closer toward mine and I could feel his warm breath fanning my face. I was practically about to have a stroke from wanting him so much.

"Claire?" Quil softly spoke my name and gazed into my eyes. It was my undoing.

"Oh fuck it." All semblances of self-control vanished as I closed my eyes and smashed my mouth against his. He immediately froze and I took advantage of his surprise to continue my assault on his soft, warm lips. It was pure heaven.

I only enjoyed the contact for a few seconds though before Quil jerked his face away from me with a look of complete shock on his face.

"What was..._that_?" I felt a surge of pride when I noticed how breathy he sounded. I must have had at least some effect on him then.

"Well I tried to tell you what I was thinking about, but that didn't work so I figured I would just _show you_." I couldn't stop grinning. Kissing Quil had been the best thing to happen in my life thus far and I already wanted to do it again.

Quil's eyes were wild. "But…you…you're—" I cut him off by pressing my lips against his for the second time. I kept the contact short though and pulled away to look at his face.

"See? I think I got my point across pretty well, don't you?" Quil stared at me like he couldn't believe what he was hearing. His hands which had been resting rather passively on my back suddenly clenched a little.

"But Claire you don't really know what you're doing." He closed his eyes and his head lolled against the couch. I took the opportunity to plant a trail of kisses up his exposed neck.

"_Quil _I want this." I managed to blurt out between kisses. I felt Quil's hand on my chin as he lifted my head up toward his. The look on his face took my breath away. His eyes seemed even darker than their normal deep brown.

_Maybe he wants me just as much as I want him?_

"Please Quil_._" The words spilled out of my mouth embarrassingly, but I craved his lips so much that I couldn't bring myself to care. Quil's face was conflicted, but his hands slowly inched from their place at my back to each of my hips. I shivered at the contact.

I locked my eyes with his. "_Please_."

Suddenly whatever conflicting emotions had been holding Quil back seemed to slip away and he crashed his lips down on mine.

_Oh thank god. _

I felt as if I was surrounded by flames. Quil's lips were burning a trail of kisses across my lips, my cheeks, my neck and his characteristic warm hands clutched me tightly against his body. I responded with as much passion as I could muster, but he ended up taking control easily.

"_Quil…_"

I sighed his name as his mouth found a sensitive spot along my jawline. I grasped his short hair in my fingers and held on for dear life. I felt like I might pass out at any moment.

Soon my hands were wandering over his hard chest and down, down, down until I reached the hem of his shirt. Unconsciously my fingers began to slip underneath the cotton material to seek out warm flesh as he continued kissing me like his life depended on it. When my hands finally came in contact with his skin however, he froze.

_Uh-oh._

Just as suddenly as Quil had begun kissing me, he was jerking our bodies away from each other. He pushed me over to the other side of the couch before I could attempt to reconnect our lips like I wanted.

"We…we have to stop." Quil's breathing was ragged as he spoke.

I reached a hand out to him, but he flinched away.

_Ouch. _

He looked over at me with a grim expression. "I can't do this Claire."

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><p><strong>AN: **Please review! I would love your feedback, positive or negative! Thanks so much :)


	3. Don't Turn Away

**Chapter 3: Don't Turn Away**

_Don't turn, turn away  
>You're miles, miles away<br>'Cause I , I can't see you  
>Don't turn away to the night<em>

-Don't Turn Away by Peking Laundry

"I can't do this Claire." Quil's words cut through me like a knife. Had I been mistaking the signals all this time? Did he really not want me the way I wanted him? It just didn't make any sense.

"Why can't you?" I finally managed to blurt out.

I tried not to sound upset, but I knew Quil would be able to tell just by glancing at my expression. Oh the joy of being in an awkward position with someone who knew absolutely everything about you. I tried to focus all my attention on a loose thread hanging off of the couch cushion while I waited for Quil to respond. I noticed his fist clench out of the corner of my eye.

"Because it's just not…not right yet."

_Not right? What in the hell did that mean!_

I bristled with anger and accepted the change in emotion gladly. It was definitely better than feeling hurt and vulnerable. My gaze shifted up to his face where I expected to see his "mom" expression, waiting to give me a lecture about protecting my innocence or some other bullshit like that. But instead he looked conflicted and confused.

"Look at me Quil."

He sighed lightly and turned his eyes toward me. I tried not to get lost in their deep chocolatey warmth.

"Tell me why the two of us kissing is not...how did you say it? Not _right_?"

Quil's shoulders slumped a little and he ran a hand through his short-cropped hair. I wanted to follow the path of his hand with my own. Too bad Quil was being such an idiot or I would have.

"It's just all too fast Claire-bear."

I clenched my jaw in annoyance. "Don't even _think_ about calling me Claire-bear right now. I think what we just did proves I can be treated like an adult!"

"C'mon you know I wasn't trying to treat you like a kid, it's habit!"

"Well it's also _habit_ for you to act like I'm still in grade school when I clearly am not, you dumb Quil-pickle!"

Quil's lips quirked upward for a fraction of a second, before his solemn expression fell into place once more.

"I just think we shouldn't rush into anything when you're still so young. We have all the time in the world to figure this whole thing out."

He was staring at me with such gentleness in his eyes that a part of me wanted to agree to anything he suggested. But another part of me recognized that Quil needed to listen to what I wanted whether he liked it or not.

"Quil I'm old enough to feel this way. I want this." It was somewhat embarrassing to confess I wanted him as more than a friend, but it wasn't like he hadn't experienced the evidence of it already. I had practically jumped him a few minutes ago.

"But you're only seventeen! And earlier today we were just best friends and then suddenly we're kissing and stuff and…I don't know Claire, I just didn't think it would happen like that."

"So you don't want to?" My voice came out meeker than I had intended.

Quil's expression softened immediately. "No it's not that. Claire-bear you _know_ I want to. I mean you're my imprint! It's just that you probably think that just because we're imprints we have to do certain things and…"

I faintly hear d him continuing with some stupid speech about how imprinting didn't mean we had to be romantic at the first signs of attraction between us, but I started tuning him out. Because he had called me Claire-bear. Again. Deep down he still thought of me as that little kid he used to baby-sit. The revelation made my eyes sting with the tell-tale beginnings of tears.

_Don't even think about crying Claire! That'll just reinforce his view of you as a child. _

"Claire? Are you okay?" I realized that Quil was leaning toward me, worry clouding his handsome features.

"No, not really."

Quil's forehead creased and he ran a hand down my cheek. Apparently he had forgotten that he was supposed to be keeping a safe distance between us. Y'know, in case I decided to attack him again.

"Please don't be upset Claire. I'm not _trying_ to be overprotective. I just don't want you to do something that you'll regret later."

He obviously did not understand that kissing him would probably come in first place on my list of Top 10 Things I Totally Did Not Regret Doing. The number two event would be the time I _accidentally_ walked in on him taking a shower in my bathroom. Oh lordy.

"Please talk to me. You can be mad; just don't shut me out okay?" Quil was looking at me with an agonized expression and I realized I had been zoning out completely. I felt my anger ebbing as I gazed into his warm, pleading eyes.

_Don't do it Claire! It's the imprint trying to make you let him off the hook! _

I shook my head as if to physically clear my thoughts. "Quil I think you should leave."

"What?"

"You should go."

Quil's face was full of hurt and I felt my heart clench painfully beneath my ribcage.

_Stupid imprint making me feel his pain! _

"Claire, I—"

"I don't want to hear anymore about why this is all too fast and I'm too young. All I want right now is to be _alone_." I tried to sound resolute, but the words just felt wrong coming out of my mouth. Why would I ever want to be alone rather than with Quil? My body didn't seem to accept it.

"Oh. Okay then." Quil's lips tightened and he shifted away from me. I felt like crying.

I watched as he stood silently and started heading toward the door. Every cell in my body seemed to scream in protest and it was all I could do not to race after him and tell him to stay.

_It's time to take a stand. You're not a little kid anymore._

Quil paused at the door before looking over his shoulder at me. "Will you still come to Sam and Emily's later? You know we were supposed to eat dinner with them."

I must have looked like I was completely against the idea because Quil frowned even more deeply.

"I know you're mad at me, but Emily's really looking forward to it and she's making that pasta thing that you love. Please? You don't have to talk to me or anything…"

I felt guilty at the thought of disappointing my Aunt, but having to sit next to Quil for an entire meal after this whole debacle was not appealing.

_Damn it. _

I sighed resignedly. "Fine. I'll go."

Quil's expression brightened. "Good. I'll be here to pick you up in an hour."

"No. I don't want you to." Quil looked hurt. I was being such a bitch wasn't I?

I tried to speak more gently. "I mean, I would rather have Riley drive me. She should be home soon anyway."

Quil didn't look happy about my decision, but nodded and headed out the door. I heard his truck start up a minute later and tried not to wince as it screeched away from my house.

_Stupid fucking wolf. _

Why couldn't he have just gone along with my plan? It had started out so great and he had seemed totally into it too! If only Quil hadn't remembered that it was his job to be my best friend as well as a replacement for my deceased parents.

At the thought of my parents, I lost some of my anger and instead filled with sadness. I still missed them terribly, but with Quil around things weren't so bad. Being with him made me happier than anything and now I—along with my pesky hormones—had ruined that.

_But it's his fault too! He should have just gone along with his feelings instead of over-analyzing everything!_

My weirdo brain was cluttered with thoughts and continually shifted the blame for our argument between Quil and myself. It was hard being an imprint sometimes. I never wanted to be angry at Quil for longer than a few minutes.

Suddenly I felt my phone buzzing in my pocket. I immediately assumed it would be Quil and braced myself for his apologies when I caught sight of the caller-ID and realized it was my sister. I tried to ignore the disappointment that washed over me as I answered the call.

"Hello?"

"Hey loser it's me. Not that you care or anything 'cause you're probably hanging out with Quil, but I'm not going to be home until late tonight."

"Oh, why?"

"I have a date in Port Angeles. So don't wait for me to tuck you in Claire-bear." I stiffened at her sarcastic mention of my nickname. It was the last thing I wanted to hear right now.

"I'm hanging up."

Riley chuckled. "I love you too."

I sighed. "Fine love you. Bye."

I dropped the phone down onto the floor and threw my body across the couch. I had apparently lost my ride to Sam and Emily's which meant I should probably call Quil. He wouldn't want me walking over there or anything.

_Screw that! Do it anyway._

I played with a strand of my long black hair and imagined Quil's reaction when I showed up at the house on my own. He probably would freak out and tell me that the woods were too dangerous to walk through and that I could have been killed. He tended to overreact a bit. Well okay, A LOT.

_Another sign that he thinks I'm young and defenseless._

Suddenly, the thought of walking to Sam and Emily's seemed like a good idea. It was only a few miles away and I definitely could use the fresh air to clear my thoughts before seeing Quil again. I was entitled to do at least that wasn't I? Quil would just have to get over it.

Gathering up my phone and keys, I slipped out the door and started heading toward the line of trees that stood adjacent to the side of my house. As I walked into the woods, I was reminded of how beautiful the nature in La Push was. The faint light shining through the branches above warmed my face and I felt much more at peace than I had minutes before.

_This is what I need. Just relax. _

I continued along the worn path that lead to my Aunt's home and tried not to consider if Quil's rejection of my advances was due to more than just over-protectiveness. Though we were imprints, I was still a teenage girl after all and I couldn't help but wonder if Quil just wasn't attracted to me. Maybe he wanted to wait until I was more attractive? Maybe he hoped I would develop more as I aged?

_God what if he never feels like that for me?_

My doubts were becoming overwhelming and I stopped to lean against a tree. Running my hand along the rough bark, I flinched when my index finger came into contact with a sharp point. Glancing toward my hand I saw that I had failed to notice the thorny vines wrapping around the tree trunk and my finger had paid the price.

_That's what I get for obsessing over Quil like always._

I flipped my hand over and sighed in annoyance at the sight of blood running down my finger. Quil wouldn't be happy if he spotted this. I made to continue along the path when suddenly I noticed something odd. Not that I had been paying much attention before, but it seemed as if the forest had gone inexplicably silent. The birds weren't chirping, the insects weren't buzzing, and no squirrels or chipmunks were rustling in the undergrowth.

_What the hell?_

A sudden feeling of being watched settled over me and I turned around quickly to see if someone was there. There was nothing.

_Don't freak out. You're probably overreacting._

I took a few steps forward hoping that my feelings of uneasiness would pass. Instead I heard a strangely smooth voice come from behind me.

"Interesting."

Every hair on my body seemed to stand on end as I was gripped by fear. The voice didn't sound right. It didn't even sound _human_. But it couldn't be, could it? Not one of _them._

I felt a soft breeze and suddenly a figure was looming before me.

_Oh no. This can't be real._

I knew immediately that this handsome man with the red eyes and marble skin was not human. I took in his slightly haggard appearance; his hair was long and unkempt and his clothing seemed quite worn. He was a vampire. And I was a screwed.

"Your scent is quite abnormal." His words snapped me out of my observations. I tried not to cower in fear as his gaze rested on my face before shifting down to my still bleeding finger. His mouth turned upward into a chilling smile. "But I must say your blood is still appealing."

I automatically tucked my finger up into my palm despite the fact that I knew it was pointless. There could be no defense against such a creature.

_So this is how I die…_

The fear that gripped my heart was so intense that I felt as if I might faint. I almost wished I would. At least I wouldn't be conscious for what was about to come. I suppose I should have been pleading with the vampire to spare my life, but the words were caught up in my throat. I could barely breathe, let alone speak.

The man eyed me with a teasing grin on his face. "Aren't you going to say something? Beg for your life?"

I met his red stare and suddenly Quil's face popped into my mind. I would never see him again. I would never get to tell him that I was, and had always been, in love with him. And it was entirely this vampire's fault. Anger, regret, and terror consumed me.

"Fuck you." _Wow. I actually said that out loud. Fuuckkk.  
><em>

Apparently I had a death wish or something because I had just insulted my soon-to-be killer. The vampire's expression immediately twisted to one of rage and hunger as he eyed me. My time was up.

_Quil, I love you._

I closed my eyes as the vampire lunged for my throat.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **Hope to hear from some of you! And thanks to those who reviewed on the last chapter...I really appreciate it :) And Happy New Year! See you in 2012!


	4. A Real Hero

**Chapter 4: A Real Hero**

_Water warmer than, his head so cool  
>In that tight bind knew what to do<br>And you have proved to be  
>A real human being and a real hero<em>

-A Real Hero by College

The lethal impact I had been expecting never came. Instead I felt a rush of air pass in front of me as a sound akin to two cars colliding filled my ears.

_What was that?_

My eyes sprang open and tried to focus on the blur of movement in front of me. It was a difficult task due to the speed at which the two shapes were moving, but I recognized the flashes of dark brown fur that I knew belonged to my favorite wolf.

"Quil!"

I couldn't stop the strangled cry from erupting out of my throat as I watched him fight against the deadly vampire. It was impossible to tell who was winning the battle, but I was terrified that Quil would be injured or worse.

Suddenly I felt a tugging on the back of my shirt and turned around, coming face to face with a gigantic wolf muzzle. The sandy color fur alerted me that it was Seth and I let out a small sigh of relief. Help had come for Quil and I. I allowed Seth to pull me farther away from the fight, but flinched when a sound like ripping metal pierced the air.

_Holy shit. Shit shit shit. _

I fought the urge to pass out when I saw a ghostly white arm land only a few feet away from us. It was hard to believe that Quil was the one responsible for such carnage.

Seth rubbed his soft muzzle against my arm in what I'm sure he hoped was a comforting gesture, but all I could focus on was the sounds of the fight and the terror that was gripping my insides. Suddenly a harsh wolf cry sounded out and I automatically lunged forward to help Quil.

"Seth, do something! Help him!"

My cries fell on deaf ears as Seth merely pulled me back away from Quil and the vampire. I was in a state of panic as I watched Quil struggle out of the tight hold the creature had around his furry neck. Why wasn't Seth doing anything?

"_Please_ Seth, he could get hurt!"

I stared pleadingly into Seth's familiar eyes, but recognized firm resolve in his gaze. His job was to protect _me_, not Quil.

_I can't just stand here and watch Quil get hurt. I have to—_

My thoughts were interrupted by the feel of air rushing past my face. Quil's large wolf body was suddenly very close as he rolled to a stop in front of Seth and me. He immediately sprang to attention however, as a white blur that I knew to be the vampire propelled itself toward him.

Ferocious snarls broke out as they collided mid-air only feet away from my face. I tried to stay calm, but another piercing cry from Quil as he was pinned onto the forest floor, had me launching myself toward the pair. Apparently Seth was distracted enough that he didn't register my movement, but the vampire did. As quickly as he had pinned Quil, he was springing off of him and toward me instead, bloodlust evident in his eyes.

But before the impact came, a flash of chocolate brown fur flew in front of me.

_Oh no. _

With a sickening crunch, Quil's wolf form flew through the air and landed against a large tree stump, his head striking first. I felt frozen in place as Seth leapt over my head and attacked the vampire who had been thrown off guard by Quil's interference. Seth's snarls were soon joined by another wolf's as what appeared to be Embry suddenly bounded onto the scene from my right.

I didn't bother to watch as they began to tear the creature apart, I was much too worried about Quil whose body was lying in the exact same position it had landed.

_Please God let him be okay…_

My breathing was uneven as I approached his huge form slumped against the tree stump that had absorbed the impact.

"Quil?" I rasped out quietly.

I couldn't stop the tears that began to pool in my eyes as I took in the sight of him. Bloody lacerations covered his torso and a long gash ran from his flank down his left leg. Kneeling down next to Quil's head, I gasped when I noticed blood dripping from a cut on the front of his forehead where it had obviously struck the stump. Even more disturbing however, was the clear fluid that appeared to be draining from his ear and upon noticing it I felt bile rise in my throat.

"Oh my god Quil! Wake up! _Wake up_!"

I was becoming hysterical as I latched onto Quil's body and tried desperately to force him back to consciousness.

"Please Quil! You can't be-be…." A sob cut off the rest of my sentence and all I could do was clutch dark fur beneath my fingers and hope that Quil felt the pull.

"Claire!" I barely registered Embry's deep voice calling out to me.

A moment later, hot hands were prying my fingers lose from the death grip onto Quil's fur and tugging me up into a standing position.

"Claire it's okay. Shh it's okay." Embry gathered me up against his bare chest and I struggled for a moment trying to escape his hold.

"Embry…I-I need to be with-with _Quil_. He's hurt. He n-needs m-m-me!" My words were obstructed by sobs that threatened to choke me.

Seth was in human form now and kneeling next to Quil, trying to rouse him.

"He's still breathing." Seth's normally cheerful voice was chillingly serious as he glanced up toward us.

"Quil!" I practically screamed as I continued to struggle against Embry's grip. "Quil please…"

It was too much. I needed to feel Quil's warmth against me to know that he was still alive. If he died I would die too. Panic and agony consumed me at the thought of Quil's death and suddenly my vision was blurring as the world seemed to spin rapidly around me.

"Claire are you okay?"

My knees began to buckle and soon everything went black. I succumbed to the relief of unconsciousness.

I woke to the sound of whispering. Opening my eyes slowly, I took in the sight of the dark room I was in. It was my old room at Sam and Emily's house, still painted that pale yellow color I loved. I rolled onto my side on the bed and peered out the door into the dim hallway.

_How long have I been out? _

The faint sound of voices from the hallway caught my attention and I honed in on them. At first it was impossible to understand anything, but as I became more and more cognizant, I caught fragments of the conversation.

"…severe head trauma…lucky to be alive…you don't think…permanent?…"

Were they talking about Quil?

I finally recognized the voice of my Aunt Emily and I tried calling out to her. "Aunt Em."

My voice sounded brittle and raw even to my own ears. It was as if I had spent the day shouting at the top of my lungs. The whispering came to an abrupt stop and almost immediately, Emily was at my side.

"Claire honey, how are you? Do you need anything?"

"Where's Quil?" I watched her expression closely as it grew pained.

"He's resting right now."

"So he's-he's alright?" I tried to control my emotions. Quil needed me to be strong for him.

Emily paused a second as if waiting to choose the right words. "Quil hasn't woken up yet honey. He took quite a blow to the head…we're not sure what to expect…"

I gripped the blanket that was around me tightly. "But he's a _wolf! _Shouldn't he be healed by now?"

"We don't really know what's wrong. Sam's spoken with Dr. Cullen on the phone and he's coming as soon as he can."

"Where is he? I need to see him!"

Emily sighed resignedly. "Okay Claire. Only if you feel up to it though." Kim suddenly appeared in the doorway holding a glass of water in her hand.

"You can see Quil _after_ you drink a little water. You're probably dehydrated or something by now."

I wanted to resist, but Kim's expression told me there was no point in arguing with her. I had always been close with the other imprint girls, but after my parents died, Kim and Emily treated me as if I was their own daughter.

After chugging down the entire glass of water—apparently I _was_ rather thirsty—I practically ran out of the room in search of Quil. I only made it a few steps into the hallway however, when I collided into a large, warm body.

"Claire! I was just coming to get you!" Brady's excited voice rang out over my head.

Taking a step back so that I could look up at him, I felt relief flood through me upon seeing Brady's smile. This had to mean positive news!

"Is it Quil? Is he awake?"

"Yea. He finally opened his eyes about a minute ago and the first thing he said was 'fuck my head hurts.' That has to be a good sign right?"

I didn't even bother responding. All I could think about was the fact that Quil was awake and alive. Pushing past Brady's towering form, I raced down the hallway before I reached my Aunt and Uncle's room. It made sense that Quil would be in the biggest room in the house since it was the only one that could accommodate so many huge wolf visitors.

Seth was leaning against the door frame and was the first to notice my presence.

"Feeling any better Claire?"

He eyed me skeptically like I might pass out again any second. I tried to smile and reassure him, but my mouth twisted into more of a grimace instead.

"Yea, I'm okay. I just need to see Quil."

I felt his warm hand rub the top of my head affectionately. "Of course."

Seth stepped aside and I slowly walked into the bedroom. My excitement from minutes ago was quickly vanishing being replaced with fear that Quil would be moaning in pain or still bleeding from the head.

_Comforting Quil is the most important thing right now, remember?_

The room was dimly lit, the only light source being a small lamp on the bedside table and I noticed for the first time since waking that the windows were dark indicating that night had fallen. I had to have been asleep for at least a few hours.

Glancing around the room I noticed Paul and Jared leaning against the wall in one corner, while Embry was pacing about. Sam's large form sat hunched in a chair next to the bed. I finally laid eyes on Quil's body stretched out across the mattress and stifled a small sob.

"He's-he's not dead. He's really okay."

Everyone's gaze seemed to shift to me as I moved slowly to the side of the bed. Embry moved silently behind me and rested a comforting hand on my shoulder.

"He woke up for a minute, but it looks like he's out again."

I nodded, not trusting myself to speak as I took in the sight of Quil's closed eyes and peaceful expression.

Sam cleared his throat and I glanced in his direction. "Claire, we called Dr. Carlisle Cullen. You remember him don't you?"

Of course I remembered the Cullens. Though they no longer lived in Forks, when I was younger Jake and Quil had set up play dates between Renesmee Cullen and I. I had actually been to the Cullen's house once or twice, though the memory of it was a bit hazy.

"Are the Cullens coming here then? Is Jake coming?"

"Well it looks like only Carlisle and Jake will be making the trip at this point. But hopefully Quil won't need any medical attention anyway so..."

Sam's voice trailed off and I turned my attention to Quil once more.

_If only he would wake up and tell me he's alright. I need to hear his voice. _

As if he could read my thoughts, Embry nudged my side lightly.

"He'll wake up again soon. I know it." I tried to be reassured by his soft smile, but it was becoming harder to act calm the longer Quil remained asleep.

"Brady said he was in pain…did he ask for anything? Did he ask for-for…me?"

I heard a chuckle from behind me. Probably Paul.

Sam sent a dark glance toward the men in the corner before looking at me. "He didn't really ask for anything sweetie. I think he's pretty out of it still."

"He was coherent enough to tell Collin to get the fuck out of his face." Paul's braying laugh filled the room and I tried to ignore it.

"What did Collin _do_?" I questioned accusingly. I now realized there was probably a reason Collin was nowhere to be seen.

Embry sighed a little. "Once Quil was awake he kind of launched himself right onto Quil's chest…you know how over-excited he can get? And yea, Quil wasn't too thrilled."

I couldn't help the small smile that played across my lips at the thought of spastic Collin getting told off. If it had been any other situation, I probably would have laughed too, but my worry for Quil still consumed me.

"Is there anything Dr. Cullen said to do for him?" I changed the subject, turning my attention toward Sam again. "I mean Quil probably needs—"

"He's waking up!" Seth's voice interrupted my sentence and soon everyone was gathered around the bed watching as Quil's eyes fluttered.

"He must have heard Claire say his name…I _knew_ that would help." Embry was muttering softly next to me, but I ignored him.

_C'mon Quil, I'm here now. I'm here._

No one seemed to be breathing as Quil's eyes finally opened and slowly began focusing on the people huddled around him. His gaze traveled from left to right, pausing to examine the faces of his pack brothers until he had reached mine.

Suddenly his brow quirked and he looked at me in confusion. "What's _she_ doing here?"

* * *

><p><strong>AN: So I'm not too thrilled with how this chapter turned out, but oh well haha. I would love to hear your thoughts on it! Please review and lots of love and thanks your way :) **


	5. Hide and Seek

_Spin me round again and rub my eyes.  
>This can't be happening.<br>When busy streets a mess with people  
>would stop to hold their heads heavy.<em>

-Hide and Seek by Imogen Heap

"What's _she _doing here?"

The words hung in the air for a moment before I could actually process them. Why would Quil ask _that _of all things? I racked my brain for a second, trying to think of why my presence would offend him. The only thing I could think of was that he was feeling angry at me for walking alone in the woods and almost becoming dinner for a vampire, but that seemed strange seeing as he was probably more relieved that I had survived than anything.

But when I looked at Quil's expression he didn't seem angry or relieved. In fact, he didn't seem like he was feeling much of _anything_, which was very un-Quil-like.

"Quil I—" I started to begin an apology or something just to talk to him, but was cut off by a small snort from behind me.

"Why do you _think_ she's in here bro? She wanted to make sure you're not a brain-dead vegetable." Paul's voice was filled with humor, but Quil's face remained impassive in response. It was really weird.

"Why would I be brain-dead?" Quil intoned softly after a moment's pause.

My heart ached as I realized that Quil didn't even realize how close he had been to death. I wanted to respond to his question, but I was worried that my voice would be shaky or turn into a sob. My emotions were still pretty raw even now that I knew Quil was alright. It had been much too close…

Embry spoke up and I didn't have to. "Well you hit your head pretty hard. You don't remember that?"

Quil's eyebrows were scrunching together adorably like they always did when he was thinking particularly hard about something. After a few seconds he exhaled a whoosh of air through his nostrils.

"Huh no, I don't remember that at all. Weird."

"Do you remember fighting the vampire then?", Seth asked him.

I flinched a little at the memory of my would-be killer and tried not to think about cruel red eyes and marble skin. Studying Quil's face seemed to help keep my mind off of it.

He was now brushing his hand over the unblemished skin of his forehead that had healed completely by this point, leaving little evidence of the earlier injury behind.

"I don't remember that either..." Quil's hand fell from his forehead down to the soft blue comforter. "Well, actually I don't really remember _anything_ about today."

_Maybe that's for the best. He would probably be freaking out and checking me for injuries if he remembered how close I came to that vampire._

Seth shrugged before patting him on the arm. "Well I don't think that's a big deal. We took care of it and Claire's safe now so you don't have to worry."

I could feel Embry tense up beside me. "_Seth_. What the hell?"

Seth's encouraging smile was immediately replaced by a fearful expression as he realized what he had unintentionally given away. Quil now knew that I had been somehow involved with a vampire attack and would likely blow a gasket.

_CODE RED. CODE RED. Prepare for Overprotective Quil freak-out mode! _

A collective silence fell as everyone waited for Quil's impending reaction. Instead of leaping out of bed and seeing if I was unscathed like I expected however, he just glanced around at us with a curious expression on his face.

"Why are you guys looking at me like I'm about to phase right here in the bed?"

Embry's eyes narrowed in on him. "You're not…_upset_?"

Quil raised his eyebrows at his best friend and replied, "I mean aside from the fact that I feel like someone took a hammer to my head, no, not really."

Seth let out a loud sigh of relief as I leaned in closer toward Quil's body lying on the bed. I couldn't believe he hadn't said anything to me yet. Hell, he had barely even _looked_ at me this whole time! I needed to figure out what was going on with him.

"Quil," I began, "Are you feeling okay though? I mean, is it hurting really badly?"

Quil's head snapped over to face me and when he met my eyes, he furrowed his brow. "Um yea…yea I'm alright." His voice seemed oddly detached and I wasn't the only one who noticed.

"You're not going to ask how _Claire_ is doing?" Jared's voice spoke up for the first time since I had been in the room.

"Claire?" Quil sounded confused and his eyes were shifting around as if waiting for a cue from someone.

"Who else?" I felt Jared's hands on my shoulders as he gave me a gentle shake. Quil noticed the action and stared at my face searchingly.

_What the HELL is going on?_

"Oh you're Claire?"

I sucked in a sharp breath and then exhaled shakily. "_What_?"

"Quil, man that's not funny." Paul called out from over my shoulder. I kept my eyes trained on Quil, waiting for him to burst into laughter or yell out "gotcha!", but neither of those things happened. Instead he just stared at me as if _I_ was the one that was playing a joke on him.

He frowned a little before responding. "What do you mean? I wasn't trying to be funny…"

Suddenly Sam was leaning in closely over the bed, towering over Quil's body in all his Alpha-wolf glory. "Be straight with me now. You're telling me you don't know who she is? You don't recognize her?"

I held my breath waiting for Quil to deny it. It just couldn't be possible that he had forgotten me.

"Uh well no. Should I recognize her?" Quil was now nervously glancing back and forth between Sam and I.

_No. no. no. no. This can't be happening…_

"Holy shit." Paul's voice had lost all humor now and I could feel the tension mounting in the room. Embry gripped my elbow as if he was anticipating some sort of violent reaction out of me. I was so shocked however, that I felt as if I could barely breathe, let alone move around.

It took a few moments before Sam finally spoke up again. "Quil, I want you to look at Claire. I mean _really look_ at her and try to remember. I know you will."

Quil looked perplexed, but nodded his head in agreement before locking eyes with me. I couldn't breathe or speak; I stood there frozen as I waited for some sort of acknowledgement from my favorite person in the whole world. When I noticed that his gaze was devoid of the characteristic warmth and love that he reserved for me, I felt a terrible numbness take over my body.

_Please Quil, please know me._

After what felt like an eternity, but was probably only a minute or so, Quil dropped his eyes from mine and rubbed them with the back of his hand. I felt Embry's grip tighten on my arm as we waited for him to talk once more.

"I think I remember now…" Quil began hesitantly, "You're Emily's niece right? So Claire _Young_?"

"Yea that's right, but what else?" Sam was prodding him along as everyone waited for him to shout out that I was his best friend, soulmate, IMPRINT.

"That's all I know. I mean, I heard Emily talk about her a few times, but I don't think I ever met Claire in person…" Quil said softly as he gauged the reactions of the crowd around his bed.

"WHAT? You've never met her? Seriously Quil! It's _Claire_ for fucks sake!" Brady's incredulous voice was suddenly echoing through the room as he apparently had enough of this ludicrous conversation. It was almost a relief that someone had finally acknowledged how fucking insane this really was.

Sam glared at Brady menacingly. "Calm down. That isn't going to help with any—"

"But this just isn't fucking possible! He can't forget his im—"

"Will someone tell me what the hell is the big deal here? What am I not remembering about Emily's niece that is so damn important?" Quil had finally lost his patience with the situation and was scowling at Brady in resentment.

I had to say _something_ at least. "Quil you-you really don't remember?" My voice was raspy, but loud enough that it caught his attention. He stared at me a moment before shaking his head 'no'.

_He really doesn't remember me. _

I felt someone grab me by the waist as my knees began to buckle underneath me.

"Embry, take her out of here please," Sam ordered with a stern tone and I felt warm hands guiding me away from the bed. I resisted weakly for a second, not wanting to be separated from Quil again, but when I registered the fact that he didn't seem to care if I came or went I let myself be lead out.

I felt like I was sleep-walking as I allowed Embry to guide me down the hallway back toward my old room where Emily and Kim were still waiting. Vaguely I wondered who was watching their own small children, but came to the conclusion that it must be Rachel, seeing as she was nowhere to be seen.

"Claire honey? What's wrong?" Emily questioned me with a careful voice as she rose from her seated position on the bed.

"_Quil_…" I managed to utter his name, but nothing else. Emily's face became increasingly alarmed and both she and Kim glanced at Embry expectantly.

"Quil seems to have lost part of his memory," He intoned quietly from behind me.

"Just from today? Or is it the whole week? How much?" Emily's questions were frantic and yet almost made me want to laugh at how optimistic they were. She obviously couldn't even imagine that he would forget something as important his imprint.

"It's not really like that Em. Quil acts like he remembers everyone…well everyone in the pack at least…" Embry's voice trailed off and I knew he was worried about discussing this in front of me. Emily simply stood there waiting for him to continue, but I could practically see the wheels turning in Kim's brain as she eyed me. Her expression quickly became horrified.

"You mean he can't remember _Claire_?" She whispered, despite the fact that I could obviously hear everything.

Embry must have nodded in confirmation because Emily gasped and began shaking her head furiously.

"That's not possible. She's his _imprint_! A wolf can't forget something like that…must be a mistake…" I couldn't make out the rest of her mumbling, but it didn't matter. She would have to accept the truth once she saw Quil in person.

_Easier said than done huh?_

I let out a long breath that I didn't realize I was holding and Emily's attention shifted back to me.

"Oh Claire," She began as tears welled up in her eyes, "I can't even imagine—"

"C'mon now Emily, let's just let Claire rest okay? She probably doesn't want to discuss this right now." I was grateful for Kim's interruption and let her push me down on the bed without protest.

"Yea I'd rather be alone right now I think." Emily was looking at me skeptically, but Kim and Embry simply nodded in response.

"I'll stay with Quil…I'll make sure he's okay. And when he starts asking for you, I'll let you know Claire." Embry was trying to make me feel better and I wanted to believe that he was right more than anything.

"Thanks Embry," I whispered before he silently glided out the door.

Kim smiled at me weakly. "He's right you know. Quil will come around, so don't let yourself get all red-nosed from crying! You know Quil hates when you cry."

I tried to smile at her attempt at light-heartedness, but instead just muttered another thanks before she too left. It was just me and Aunt Emily now and I tried to avoid looking at her teary eyes, knowing how they would affect me.

"Claire, you don't have to act strong in front of us you know that right?" I shifted uncomfortably as I felt a stinging in my eyes.

"I know. I just don't want to think about this yet…" What I really meant was that I hoped by not acknowledging the facts they would somehow disappear.

"I'll sit with you Claire. We don't have to talk." Emily was trying so hard to be there for me, but I continued to resist.

"I think I'll just go to sleep actually if you don't mind."

_And maybe when I wake up everything will be back to normal._

It wasn't like me to be so passive about a problem, especially one concerning Quil, but Emily seemed to realize that I sought solitude.

"Okay honey, but you know if you need me just call." She smoothed down my hair and pulled the covers up around my body the way she used to do when I was younger.

"I know." I rolled onto my side and watched her walk to the doorway where she shut off the lights.

"Love you Claire-bear."

I cringed upon hearing my nickname because it reminded me so much of Quil. "Love you too."

Once the door was safely shut and I was finally alone, the composure I had somehow managed to maintain swiftly began to crumble. A sob rose in my throat and I buried my face into the pillow trying to stifle it. I knew that the moment I lost it everyone would know. Sometimes it sucked being surrounded by wolves with super-sensitive hearing.

_Would Quil hear me too? _

At the thought of Quil, I immediately flashed back to the detached expression that had taken over his face while looking at me. The tears were hot and salty as they poured from my eyes onto the pillow and I didn't even attempt to wipe them away.

_Maybe Quil's injuries just need to heal more and he'll gain back all of his memories after that. _

I knew my logic wasn't sound, but I couldn't allow myself to sink into despair just yet. I was Quil's imprint and that wasn't something that disappeared so easily. As exhaustion overtook me I clung to the small bit of hope that tomorrow would bring a brighter day.

_Please remember me Quil…_

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Poor Claire :( Kinda angsty, but things have got to get tough before they can get better right? Anyway, thanks so so much to everyone who reviewed the last chapter! It totally makes my day :) **_  
><em>


	6. Energy

**Chapter 6**

_Seems only like yesterday, not even gravity  
>Could keep your feet off the ground when you were with me<br>How can two be as one? We've become so divided now  
>There's no use hiding from my misery, no<em>

-Energy by Keri Hilson

When I woke up the next morning I felt like I had slept for days. Grogginess filled every molecule in my body and I was so disoriented that it took a few moments before I realized I was in the room at Aunt Emily's and Uncle Sam's. Though it wasn't sunny outside—no surprise seeing as it was overcast almost constantly in La Push—I squinted a little, letting my eyes adjust to their surroundings.

_My old room. Where's Quil? Oh God, Quil. Quil. Quil. _

The brief moment of delirious ignorance I had upon waking was immediately shattered when I remembered what had happened yesterday. Quil and his impossible memory loss was all I could focus on for at least five minutes as I allowed overwhelming feelings of panic and heartbreak to course throughout my body. The episode left me struggling for breath and clutching a shaky hand to my chest, my fingers clawing at the fabric of my shirt.

_Breathe Claire. Just breathe. _

I slowly calmed down my breathing to a pace that wasn't so erratic, but my heart still beat furiously against my ribcage protesting my attempt at self-control. It was alarming how I could barely get a handle on my emotions simply sitting here alone in bed. How would I react when I was able to see Quil again? The thought of him caused my heart rate to spike to an even faster rhythm.

_Damn it, calm down!_

A few minutes and some deep calming breaths later, I was on my way to behaving like a normal human being. Well, for the most part. I may have resorted to mentally singing one of those old Britney Spears songs that Emily used to play for me as kid to distract myself from Quil. What can I say? Hit Me Baby One More Time was fucking soothing.

_Just keep it together and start moving one step at a time. _

I wasn't sure what would happen the minute I walked out of this room, but I knew I couldn't stay in here forever. With a heavy sigh I pushed myself up from the enticing comfort of my bed and shivered when my bare feet touched the cold floor. Socks would definitely be my first priority.

Shuffling over to the wooden dresser, I pulled open a familiar drawer and began sorting through the mess of random socks that I knew were a mix of mine and Quil's. My heart tugged painfully when I picked up one of Quil's giant-sized socks.

"Claire you're up!"

I paused mid-scavenge upon hearing the loud voice behind me. That voice was one I hadn't heard for a while and was one I sorely missed. Turning around, I grinned when I saw Jacob Black's bulky form in the doorway.

"Jake! Oh my god, you're here!"

His returning smile was just as bright as he quickly crossed the room and picked me up in a bone-crushing hug. I clung to him tightly, forgetting for just a moment the dark circumstances that had brought him here.

"Why are you holding that nasty looking sock?"

He was eyeing Quil's worn sock in my hand that I had apparently forgotten to let go of in my excitement. Just like that and the reality of the situation rushed back to me. Not even Jake's return could erase what had happened with Quil.

"Oh, I was just cold and was looking for something to wear," I said with much less enthusiasm in my voice.

Jake noticed the change and cocked his head to the side. "Are you not happy to see me? That hurts Claire, I've traveled so far!"

"You know I'm thrilled to see you, ya big oaf." I punctuated the last word with a punch to his over-sized arm. He winced theatrically, but I knew he could barely feel the impact.

"Such harsh treatment. No wonder I hardly visit." He was grumbling, but the twinkle in his eye betrayed him. I couldn't help but smile, which is what I could tell Jake was trying to accomplish. I knew he would be just as worried about me as the others and would feel the need to look after me in Quil's stead.

"See there we go, the infamous Claire-bear grin. I've missed it."

"Then you shouldn't wait months before visiting us!" It was easy to slip into the friendly banter and honestly, it distracted me from thinking about Quil.

"Blame Nessie, not me. She's off studying like the braniac she is and can't bear for me to ever leave her." I scoffed a little, knowing that it would take an army to drag Jake away from Renesmee's side willingly. _Or an emergency,_ my brain added as an afterthought.

_Shit. Back to Quil again._

Jake's discerning eyes must have caught my inner struggle because suddenly he was hugging me again.

"She wanted to come too, you know, Nessie I mean. But I told her it would better if it was just me at first," he spoke softly without any traces of humor left in his voice.

"I'm glad you're here Jake," I responded after a moment. He released me from the embrace and gave me another warm smile.

"It'll all work out Claire-bear. Don't worry."

I nodded even though I didn't really know if I believed him or not. Quil's sock was still bunched up in my hand and I placed it back in the drawer with more tenderness than was needed. Suddenly Jake was tugging me by the wrist toward the doorway.

"Now enough with this, I think it's time you get some breakfast in you. Guess what Emily's got cooking?"

"Please say _waffles_." My mouth immediately watered at the thought. I hadn't eaten anything since lunch the day before.

Jake pulled me after him into the hallway. "It's your lucky day kid. Emily was 'worry-cooking' and made like every type of waffle imaginable. I'm not sure if there will be anymore chocolate chip ones left for you though…"

"I will _kill_ Seth Clearwater if he's eaten all of my choco-waffles!" My stomach had suddenly taken the place of my brain and I was dashing down the hallway toward the kitchen like my life depended upon it. I could hear Jake's laughter ringing out behind me as I passed Sam and Emily's son Grayson's bedroom and finally their own master bedroom door.

_Quil's in there._

The realization brought me to an abrupt halt. Had having Jake around diverting my attention to normal activities really caused me to forget about Quil?

_No, but it feels like everything is right now. Like Quil is actually down there saving me some waffles like he always does. _

"Claire?" I could hear the uncertainty in Jake's voice as he came to a stop behind me.

"I need to see him Jake," I said before placing a hand on the doorknob. Jake's hand covered my own, dwarfing it considerably.

"Not right now okay? Get some food and sit with the rest of the family first." He was pulling my hand off the handle, but I resisted with more force than he expected and managed to maintain my grip.

"_No_. I want to see him now."

"Claire, I don't want you getting upset again before you've even had a chance to build some of your strength up," Jake answered frankly before grimacing a little like he realized he had said too much.

I stiffened. "So Quil still…he still…doesn't remember?"

Jake's grim expression verified my statement. It was almost like hearing Quil tell me he didn't know who I was all over again. Almost unconsciously I had built up a significant amount of hope that the new day would fix everything and bring Quil back to me. Accepting that it hadn't caused my heart to shatter for a second time.

_Steady. Hold it together Claire. _

"C'mon. Breakfast first and then Quil. He's with Carlisle now so don't worry." Jake pulled me away from the door and gave me a push down the hallway. Realizing that he was probably right and that Carlisle might be doing something important, I made my way toward the kitchen, albeit with considerably less eagerness than before.

The room was filled to the brim with pack members like I expected, but it was much too quiet to pass for a normal breakfast gathering.

"Look who decided to finally join us," Jake called out before shuffling past me and grabbing a glass of orange juice from the counter. I stood there for a brief moment as the rest of the guys turned toward me and awkwardly tried to appear casual.

"I saved you some chocolate chip waffles Claire." Embry's soft voice was gentle as he gestured toward a plate on the table in front of him. I mumbled a quick thanks before taking the seat next to him and halfheartedly digging in.

"So did you sleep alright?" Emily asked from her position at the stove. Her habit of cooking up a ridiculous amount of food when worried was out in full force just like Jake had said.

"Yea fine," I replied between bites of waffle.

I could feel her worried eyes on me. "I talked to your sister so she knows where you're at. Apparently your cell phone is dead and she's been trying to get a hold of you."

_Oops…_

I felt a twinge of guilt when I realized I had forgotten about Riley. "Oh thanks. I usually text her when I'm not coming home so I'm sure she was just making sure I'm alright."

"She wanted to come get you, but I told her that you would want to be here while…while Quil is…"

"Yea thanks Aunt Em." I cut her off before she could continue talking about Quil's situation. Her sad, pitying voice was understandable, but not what I needed right now. She seemed to get the hint and turned back to the stove where she busied herself frying up some bacon.

I finished the rest of my waffles mostly in silence as the guys attempted to keep up a conversation that seemed more forced than anything. It was a relief for me then when I noticed Embry perk up and look at the doorway as if he knew someone was approaching from the hallway. Moments later a strikingly handsome, but also extremely pale man entered the kitchen and I breathed a small sigh of relief. It was Carlisle Cullen.

Jake was the first to speak. "So what's the verdict Carlisle?"

I held my breath while Carlisle's eyes scanned the room before settling on me. His serious expression was unsettling, but I tried to not waver under his stare.

"I'm sure you've been worried most of all Claire." I nodded a little. "I know it's been a while since you've seen me, but I'm Carlisle Cullen." His voice was kind and gentle, so unlike the vampire I had encountered in the woods.

"Of course I remember you Dr. Cullen."

He smiled at me before replying, "You can call me Carlisle." I nodded again and he began to address the entire room once more. "As you all know, Quil has suffered a very traumatic injury and has displayed signs of memory loss."

I gripped the edge of the table as he paused for a moment.

"Now what's strange about this is the fact that his memory loss seems so…for lack of a better word _selective_." Carlisle's eyes met mine for a brief second and I saw an almost imperceptible frown mar his attractive features.

"Quil seems to have reverted back to the mental state he was in before he imprinted on Claire. Strangely, he is aware of _who_ Claire is, at least to the level where he can connect her to her Aunt Emily, but that seems to be the extent of it."

I flinched when I heard Emily suddenly set her frying pan onto the burner with a bang. She was now facing Carlisle with an angry expression that I seldom saw. "But a wolf can't forget about imprinting! It's not just a mental connection, it's-it's so much more than that!"

Sam, who had been quiet during her outburst, was abruptly at her side, running his hands down her arms and whispering something that was too soft for me to hear. She sighed a little, but still managed to shoot Carlisle a questioning look from behind Sam's body.

"I understand that it's hard to accept right now, but at this point it's more or less a waiting game to see if Quil's condition is only temporary or well…not." Carlisle's tone was even gentler as he breathed the last word.

_If Carlisle doesn't even know what to do then how do we fix this? Oh God._

A strangled sound erupted from my throat of its own accord and I cringed as everyone looked at me. Suddenly Embry was standing up and glaring at Carlisle in an uncharacteristic display of aggression.

"Don't tell her things like that! There's no way this is permanent. You don't know how Quil _feels_ about Claire, trust me, he couldn't just forget that." Embry's tone was calm, but firm and I gaped up at him in surprise.

Carlisle raised his hand in a peaceful gesture. "I apologize. I didn't intend to describe Quil's condition as anything other than uncertain. But I do think it would be wise to prepare yourselves for all possible outcomes." I knew the last sentence was meant for me more than anyone else and I took an irregular breath.

"Is everything else okay with Quil though?" I questioned, suddenly wondering about the rest of Quil's condition, memory loss excluded. "I mean, is there anything else besides the-the memory loss we should be concerned about?"

Carlisle's features softened. "No Claire, he's perfectly fine otherwise. His accelerated healing abilities seem to have done their job well."

_Thank God. At least he's unharmed right?_

"That's what's weird about it though. Why didn't our wolf healing work with Quil's brain?" Seth said with a puzzled tone lacking any antagonism. He was obviously still comfortable with the Cullens like he had always been.

"I wish I had an answer to that, but honestly it's a bit of an anomaly for me as well. Even in normal humans brain injuries aren't well understood and the healing process can be very haphazard." Carlisle's brows were squished together in concentration, his mind obviously focused on medical questions beyond anyone else's comprehension.

"In fact," he continued on, "Quil's accelerated healing, while obviously an integral part in saving his life after the head injury, may have played a role in his memory loss. It's possible that the neuronal connections related to imprinting were altered during the healing process. Obviously there's no way to tell for sure…just a theory."

I watched Jake and Embry exchange skeptical glances that told me they were confused about the science Carlisle had described, but still worried about the connotations of his statement. This wasn't just some random forgetfulness, this was fucking neurons going haywire in Quil's brain and erasing the portion dedicated to ME.

_OH MY GOD._

Speaking of neurons going haywire, mine seemed to be spazzing out inside my skull at the moment. Maybe if I was lucky, I could suddenly forget that I was in love with Quil like he had forgotten me. It had to be easier than dealing with _this_.

Carlisle must have sensed my inner turmoil because he was regarding me with a concerned expression. "Claire, I'm not trying to frighten you. There's always a chance that Quil could suddenly remember everything. It may take time though…months, perhaps even years."

"Years." I repeated flatly. "Or most likely _never_, is what you really mean."

"Don't say that Claire-bear," Jake mumbled from his position slouched against the kitchen counter.

Carlisle chose to ignore my statement and resumed his speech. "Right now Quil needs to focus on picking up with his normal life. It would be unwise to force the idea of imprinting on him when's he in such a confused mental state and doesn't even know who Claire really is. Letting him get to know Claire again may help things along though, as long as it's done gently."

I heard Emily muttering something along the lines of "he _already_ knows her", but Carlisle gave no indication that he noticed it. The conversation continued with Carlisle mentioning something about therapy sessions at the hospital, but I was no longer truly listening. All I could think of at this point was that Quil's memory loss was real, it was likely permanent, and there didn't seem to be much hope of recovery.

_What the fuck fate?_

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I realize that there wasn't any Quil/Claire interaction in this chapter, but it was necessary to get some of this memory loss info out of the way. Don't worry, next chapter Claire and Quil will definitely be in contact.. be excited :) As always, THANKS to my reviewers! You guys are seriously the best! **_  
><em>


	7. In a Manner of Speaking

**Chapter 7**

_So in a manner of speaking  
>I just want to say<br>That just like you I should find a way  
>To tell you everything<br>By saying nothing_

-In a Manner of Speaking by Nouvelle Vague

Carlisle had left the room to make a phone call to one of his old colleagues at Forks Hospital that he felt could possibly help Quil recover, leaving the kitchen in an uproar of mini-discussions. Jake and Embry were muttering in voices I knew were intentionally too quiet for me to hear, while Paul and Jared seemed oblivious to my presence as they discussed the possibility of ever forgetting _their_ imprints.

_Geeze, way to be considerate guys. _

Sam decided after a few minutes that it was a good time to send Seth, Brady and Collin out on patrol, probably just to clear up some space in the house that was currently overflowing with wolves. Then he resumed his position standing close to Emily. I watched as Sam and Emily stared at each other with almost sickening adoration and decided it was time for me to get the hell out of this kitchen.

Rising up from my chair as noiselessly as possible, I moved around the table and slipped out of the room. Apparently no one seemed to notice or mind that I had left and I walked down the dim hallway with a feeling of relief.

_I think it's time to check on Quil…_

My nerves were painfully on edge as I slowly came to as stop in front of the master bedroom door and I took a breath to try and calm myself. It was ridiculous how anxious I felt, when it was only _Quil_ on the other side of this door. Just my best friend in the entire world who knew me better than anyone and yet who would now think of me as a stranger.

_Just open the door Claire. You need to get this over with._

Steeling myself for whatever situation might come my way, I grabbed the door knob and began to turn. Unfortunately, the knob was already turning from the inside and the door flung open causing me to stumble forward with surprising momentum. The only thing that prevented me from falling flat on my face was that I collided with a hard, solid body that didn't even flinch at the impact.

Two hot hands gripped my arms and steadied me in place. "Woah there! You okay?"

I knew that deep, velvety voice almost as well as my own. It was my Quil.

"Yea. Sorry. I was just-just you know trying to open the door. I mean _obviously_. I wouldn't just crash up into you if I could help it." Oh god. Remove foot from mouth. Why was I suddenly a nonsensical idiot?

Quil's eyebrows rose in confusion or amusement. Maybe both. "Well alright then. No harm done yea?"

I nodded vigorously like I was some weird bobble-head toy before I realized what I was doing and mentally kicked myself.

"So you're Claire right?" Quil said in a way that showed he already knew the answer to his question.

I inwardly flinched a little that he even had to ask such a thing, but tried not to show my discomfort. "Yes I'm Claire."

I didn't really know what else to say. It was a weird feeling, since I usually blabbered on non-stop when Quil was around. He eyed me for a moment before hesitantly speaking again.

"So apparently I should know who you are, but my stupid brain injury is really screwing things up. I guess I'm well…sorry about that."

His sincerity was heart-breaking. "It's not your fault Quil. Everyone is just glad you're okay. _I'm_ glad you're okay."

Quil didn't seem to pick up on the earnest tone I had used in my last statement, but nodded just the same. "It seems like the guys are pretty upset about this though. Like Embry seriously looked like he wanted to punch me after he came back from taking you out of the room last night."

He frowned, obviously still confused about this, before glancing down at my face.

"You wouldn't have any idea about that would you?" He questioned softly while I struggled to keep my face expressionless. All I wanted to do was reach out and pull him into a hug like I always did.

"Well the guys are kind of protective of me and they were probably worried about how I would react to all this," I managed to say in one long breath.

Quil's face relaxed a little. "Oh okay. So since your Emily's niece, you're like a _sister_ to all us guys then?"

_Oh hell to the NO. _

"No!" I suddenly proclaimed without thinking.

"No?" Quil repeated with a puzzled expression and I gave an awkward laugh.

"It's uh just that I'm more of a _friend_ to the guys! Like we all hang out and do stuff together as-as peers."

_As peers? What the fuck?_

Quil was staring at me like I had just spoken in Japanese, but he slowly began to nod his head. "Okay. So you and I are friends?"

_And magically bound soulmates, but that part can wait til later I suppose._

"Yes! We're friends." I would take what I could get at this point. Anything had to be better than being Quil's _sister._

"Great," Quil said with a smile lacking in the usual joyful adoration I was accustomed to. It was going to be difficult getting used to that.

I cleared my throat so that I wouldn't do something stupid like spontaneously burst into tears over the loss of _my _'Quil-smile.' Carlisle had made it very clear that I needed to keep things relaxed and casual for Quil's sake. "So are you feeling all rested up now?"

I watched closely as Quil cracked his neck with a sideways movement. "Yea I'm feeling pretty good. Well except for one thing…"

_Is he still hurting? Didn't Carlisle check everything?_

Automatically my hand reached up toward him, seeking to soothe away any ailment he might be experiencing. "What's bothering you? Should I get Carlisle?"

My voice was much too panicky, but I couldn't help it and my hand finally came to rest on Quil's upper arm where it gripped the sleeve of his t-shirt. Quil looked taken aback by my reaction and leaned a little away from me. The painful fissure in my heart expanded a bit more.

"Um actually I'm just really _hungry_." Quil's stomach let out a loud rumble to emphasize his point.

"Oh of course you are," I muttered in an embarrassingly high-pitched voice. Quil's eyes flicked over to where I was still clutching his shirt and my fingers withdrew as if they had been burned.

"Sorry. I'm still kind of freaked out since the vampire incident yesterday." It wasn't the full truth, but my nerves were pretty fried from this whole ordeal. Quil's expression softened in understanding and I suppressed another urge to hug him.

"I'm sure that was really scary for you. That leech didn't hurt you, right?" He gave my body a once-over apparently checking to see if I was unharmed. It would have been comforting except for the fact that my safety would have normally been Quil's first and most pressing concern. Now I fell somewhere behind his desire to get some food.

"No no. You got there before anything could happen." I ended up whispering, but I knew Quil's sharp hearing could pick up every word.

He seemed genuinely pleased. "That's a relief."

"Yea I never said thank you for that actually. So thank you for…saving me Quil_._ And I'm-I'm so sorry I was even out there to begin with. I was stupid. And now look what's _happened_…" I was getting choked up now, the tears pooling in my eyes with alarming speed.

Quil seemed surprised again by the intensity of my emotions and ended up looking at a point over my head instead of meeting my gaze. "Don't apologize Claire." I shivered a little when he said my name. "The pack is made to protect the tribe and I was doing my job. We all know the risks that go along with this."

_Just doing his job? I'm like a stranger to him now._

An awkward silence settled over us as Quil seemed to be unnerved by my teary-eyed expression, but didn't know how to comfort me. Luckily for him however, Jake and Embry picked that particular moment to interrupt us.

"What's going on back here?" Jake chimed as he and Embry came to stand in the doorway.

Quil was instantly more relaxed in the presence of his two closest friends and he flashed a bright smile. "Just talking to Claire."

Jake grinned back at him before responding with his characteristic "Sure, sure."

"So is there any food left for me out there? I swear I smell waffles. And _bacon_." I could practically see the drool forming in Quil's mouth as he sniffed the air excitedly.

"Nope. I ate it all sorry," Jake said with a laugh and Quil reached around me to swat at him.

Embry sighed before pulling me to his side, away from Quil and Jake. "It's all fun and games until _someone_ gets hurt," he remarked with a pointed glance at the two men currently exchanging playful blows.

Quil reached over and mussed up Embry's hair affectionately. "Oh c'mon Embry you know we wouldn't hurt her!"

It was extremely bizarre hearing _Quil_ tell someone else that _he_ wouldn't hurt me. How many times had the other pack members repeated that exact statement to calm him down?

Embry contradicted himself by punching Quil in the arm in retaliation for the hair-ruffling and I felt a fleeting urge to giggle. The three of them acted like kindergartners when they were all together, reunited like this.

_Such cute giant man-children._

"Okay enough of this. I'm checking out the food situation!" Quil called out before bolting down the hallway in the direction of the kitchen. A wolf could only last so long without succumbing to the call of his stomach.

"Typical Quil," Embry muttered before glancing toward where I was standing immobile in the doorway.

"He wasn't a jerk to you, was he?" Jake asked me before Embry could say anything.

"No, he was as nice as he always is with people he doesn't know very well." My tone was sourer than I had intended, but reflected my mood accurately.

"Don't take it to heart Claire, this is only the first time he's talked to you since the accident." Jake was trying to remain optimistic, but it didn't make me feel any better. I shrugged my shoulders and gave a little huff.

"Yea he just treats me like I'm a complete stranger…doesn't even know what to say to me. No big deal." The tears were creeping up again and I cursed my weakness. This whole pity party thing was so not me, but I kept indulging in it anyway.

_Grow up Claire. This won't help things._

Embry shot a worried glance in Jake's direction before patting me on the shoulder. "C'mon Claire, he just needs everyone to help him remember. You especially."

"But how do I even start? It's kind of hard to explain that we became best friends when I was like two years old."

Jake let out a chuckle. "Show Quil some pictures of the princess makeover you did on him for your third birthday. I'm sure that'll jog his memory!"

I giggled a little as I imagined Quil's reaction to his face covered in brightly-colored makeup. "I don't know if he can handle that information just yet. Carlisle said we need to take it slow, remember?"

"True. That's probably something he wants to forget anyway," Jake said with a grin. Embry's face on the other hand was scrunched up in concentration.

"You know," he began, "that picture thing isn't a bad idea. Showing him some photos of the two of you together could help him remember something."

Jake nodded. "See, I'm pretty much a genius."

"And better yet…" Embry continued, ignoring him, "You could take Quil places that are significant to you both and see if experiencing it with you has any effect."

"Like the beach," I mumbled, the wheels already turning in my head. Embry was right. I needed to be proactive about this memory loss thing or I was going to drive myself crazy.

"That's the spirit! Operation Quil Memory Refresh commences!" Jake's giant fist was suddenly close to my face, waiting to be bumped. I complied and knocked our knuckles together, trying to be as positive about the situation as he was.

"Operation Quil Memory Refresh? God that's _terrible_," a familiar voice drawled and I looked up to see Collin in the hallway, dirt streaked across his faded cut-offs.

Jake rolled his eyes. "And you think you can do better?"

Collin's face lit up excitedly and he leaned in with a conspiratorial grin. "Duh. If you're going to start a covert operation, it needs to have a _secret_ _code name_. You can't just hatch the chicks with the wolf in the hen house!"

I laughed my first real laugh of the day and it felt surprisingly good. "That is _not_ a legitimate saying!"

Collin waved off my statement with a fluttery hand gesture. "What it _means_, is that we can't be going around saying Operation Get Quil's Memory Back right in front of him! It needs to be _clandestine_."

"Wow I'm impressed. I didn't even think you knew any three syllable words," Embry dead-panned and Collin shot him a glare.

"So what name ideas do you have for us Agent Collin?" I tried to remain as serious as possible, but listening to Collin's spiel about secret missions was just too damn funny.

He motioned for us to all move in closer and began speaking in a hushed voice. "I was thinking Operation QUICKSAND."

I could feel my forehead wrinkling in confusion. "What does _quicksand_ have to do with anything?"

"It's an acronym of course! QUICKSAND or rather 'Quil's Unremembered Imprint Can Keenly Stand Against Needless Destruction!' Isn't it brilliant? Like it explains how you can overcome anything, even Quil's memory loss…and also the idea of Quicksand is cool because it's like you're, y'know _pulling_ him back into the imprint!"

His eyes shifted around the circle, waiting for us to respond with the same level of enthusiasm. "I'll just let that sink in for a bit," he chirped when none of us responded.

_I knew he couldn't eat 20 Strawberry Pop-Tarts everyday and not somehow be affected… _

"Holy shit Collin, that's strangely awesome," Jake finally said, effectively breaking the silence.

Embry turned to him in surprise. "Wait, what?"

"You have to admit, the little psycho's idea is pretty unique. I like it." Jake clapped Collin on the shoulder and the younger wolf beamed in pride. I knew there was no way we could change the name of our 'mission' now.

"Okay then. Operation Quicksand it is," I remarked while Embry sighed resignedly. My statement was met with a little cheer from Collin and he grabbed me into a hug, spinning me around. Seriously, for being technically older than me Collin sure as hell didn't act like it.

"You'll see Claire, this is going to work. Quil will be back to normal in no time!" Collin's words warmed my currently fractured heart because I knew he was doing all of this ultimately to help me. I loved my big, cuddly wolf family.

After a brief discussion regarding secret code names—I was now dubbed 'Triple C' which stood for Chocolate Chip Claire in a nod to my love for chocolate chip waffles—the guys were pushing me back toward the kitchen to begin the first "phase" of our operation. According to Jake, Quil needed to acclimate to my presence, so I would have to casually hang around him until he got used to me again.

Unfortunately my entrance into the kitchen wasn't so casual because Collin shouted "Triple C in the house!" when we reached the doorway and gave me a shove that caused me to stumble into the back of Quil's chair. Quil promptly began choking on an over-sized bite of waffle that he had been working on and I instinctively clapped him hard on the back to help dislodge it.

"Triple C?" I heard Paul mumbling from his spot at the table. "Isn't that the street name for some over-the counter cough medicine that people trip out on?"

_Only Collin would give me a fucking drug code name._

"Well _that_ definitely makes the name more badass!" Collin called out happily while I watched Quil continue to gag on his waffle. This whole casual thing was not working out well. Noticing that Quil's glass was empty, I quickly trotted over to the sink and filled it up with water before shoving it toward him.

"Thanks," he rasped after he finished drinking and could properly breathe again.

"No problem, I save lives all the time." I grinned happily at him, basking in the close proximity to his warm body. Quil's returning smile made me melt.

"I guess now we're even then," he replied. I nodded while Collin sent me a thumbs up from across the room. Maybe this wouldn't be as horrible as I thought it would be. Quil would eventually have to see how perfect I was for him…I just had to do like Collin said and "pull him in."

_Operation Quicksand commence!_

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Yay go Claire go :) Hope you guys enjoyed it! Would love to hear your thoughts thanks! xoxoxo :)  
><strong>


	8. Waiting For You

**Chapter 8**

_Some people wait for a lifetime  
>To feel like this baby<br>They keep waiting  
>So let's take a chance<br>While it's here, while we can  
>We can make it<br>But don't keep me waiting for you_

-Waiting for You by Jordan Pruitt

I stayed at Sam and Emily's for that entire weekend, hanging around with the pack and maintaining my casual, non-threatening presence around Quil. It was still too awkward between us for my liking, but I knew it would take time to get things back to normal. Unfortunately I was still a high school student whether I wanted to be or not, and thus, on Sunday evening I knew I needed to head back to my own house.

"So who's giving Claire a ride home?" Emily asked the guys, as I stood in the kitchen waiting to depart. I glanced at Quil out of the corner of my eye, hoping he would suddenly perk up and beg to drive me. No such luck. Quil's attentions were entirely focused on finishing the last bites of a turkey sandwich and he didn't seem to have heard Emily's question.

_I never thought I would get trumped by a damn sandwich._

"Quil and I will take her. We're heading back to our place anyway and it's nearby." Oh Embry, bless him. He totally had my back regarding all things Quil. I gave him a thankful look to which he simply shrugged in response.

"Ok then," Emily said while she pulled me into a tight hug. "Call me if you need anything Claire."

"Thanks," I sighed when she finally released me. Quil and Embry were positioned near the doorway now, Quil's hands gripping a set of keys rather than his sandwich.

"Quil, remember you need to check in with Carlisle about therapy at the hospital okay?" Emily muttered while grabbing Quil into a hug as well. He rolled his eyes at the mention of 'therapy,' but nodded anyway knowing that it was pointless to argue with her.

I pulled on my sweater, preparing myself for the drizzle that likely waited outside and watched as Quil and Embry walked out of the kitchen. The minute the screen door slammed behind them, Collin and Brady were at my side, matching grins on their faces.

"Triple C!" Collin called out much louder than was necessary. "How's Quicksand going for ya?"

_Why did I agree to these code names again?_

"I thought I told you, Triple C isn't appropriate anymore now that we know what it stands for," I told Collin while attempting to take a step toward the door. He and Brady blocked my path easily however with their giant bodies.

"Oh don't be a prude Claire!" Collin's voice was filled with laughter and he pulled the on end of my long ponytail teasingly. I groaned and tried to side-step them again with no success.

"Plus secret code names are for life anyway," Brady sang out while flicking me on the nose. I shoved him back playfully, but the action just sent them into another fit of laughter.

_So mature. _

"Okay fine, I can still be Triple C, but you guys are getting code names too!" I eyed them both with a mischievous grin. "Collin, you are now Pop-Tart and Brady _you're_…hmm…you're Toaster Strudel since it's just as delicious and unhealthy of a breakfast option."

They gaped at me for a second before Brady began to huff with indignation. "Why does _he_ get to be Pop-Tart and _I'm _Toaster Strudel? Everyone likes Pop-Tarts better…"

Collin suddenly grinned. "Well it's fitting then isn't it? I mean everyone likes _me_ better than you."

Brady glared at him while I took the opportunity to make my escape. "Bye guys! Remember, code names are for life!" I shouted loudly as I ran out the door giggling like a schoolgirl. Quil's truck was across the yard, the ignition already cranked with the guys waiting inside.

I pulled the door open and hopped into the back seat. "Sorry I took so long! Pop-Ta—I mean _Collin_ and Brady were giving me a hard time so I had to show 'em whose boss."

Quil gave a little laugh and my heart soared. "I like the sound of that. Ready to go now?"

"Yep," I chirped, my eyes glued to Quil's rugged side-profile. The truck rumbled to life, passing the house and heading out to the main road that would take us back toward my place. The ride was short and filled with pointless small-talk, only made uncomfortable by the fact that it felt a little forced between Quil and I. Soon enough we were at my house where I noticed Riley's car out front.

"Quil I just realized something." Embry muttered abruptly and my hand froze on the door handle.

"What?"

"You drove here without asking directions. So you know where Claire lives?" My heart rate sped up as I watched Quil's face scrunch up in concentration.

"Oh. I don't…I don't know." He looked confused, but I waited, hoping there would be some kind of epiphany. "I just drove I guess. It's like my body knew where to go?"

_He remembered something! Or at least a part of him did. _

A wave of happiness coursed through me and I glanced up to the rear-view mirror, trying to catch Quil's expression better. My eyes unexpectedly met deep brown as Quil's returning stare was reflected back to me and I couldn't stop a blush from covering my cheeks.

_Quil…_

After a few seconds he dropped his gaze and cleared his throat, bringing me back to reality.

"So you just drove without thinking about it?" Embry's question broke the brief silence.

"Yea I think so. I guess that's a good sign right?"

"Absolutely," I spoke up, still watching him through the rear-view mirror. "So do you…remember anything else? Like do you know whose car that is over there?"

I pointed toward Riley's car and Quil regarded it for a moment. My heart sank a little when he shook his head. "No I don't. Sorry."

"Don't worry about it! I was just wondering." I tried to cover up the disappointment in my voice with a cheerful tone, but it sounded false to my own ears.

_I guess he's forgotten everything about my life, including my family. _

"The car belongs to my older sister Riley just so you know." I added as an afterthought.

"Oh okay. Thanks." Quil's voice was careful and I felt suffocated by the sudden awkward atmosphere that filled the truck. Embry remained silent, probably feeling as uncomfortable as I was with the situation.

"Well, I guess I'll get going then. Thanks for the ride guys," I sighed regretfully, opening the cab door and hopping out onto the gravel drive. I peeked back up at Quil wanting to see him once more before going inside and was a bit startled to find him staring at me.

His mouth opened and closed once before he told me "Bye Claire" and looked away. Embry gave a little wave and I shut the door before walking toward the porch. As I listened to Quil's truck backing up behind me, the front door suddenly flung open with a resounding bang.

"Claire!" Riley's petite form that was much like my own stood in the doorway. "Finally you're home! I've been so worried about you, but Aunt Em said it was better for you to just be with the pack. And even though that's a load of BS, because everyone knows sisters are pretty much _made_ for comforting one another, I just went with it…"

Hearing her worried and annoyed voice caused an unexpected wave of emotion to well up inside of me and before I could hear the rest of her tirade I was launching myself at her. Soon I was crying like a little baby as she hugged me, rubbing my back and mumbling soothing words in a way that reminded me painfully of my mom.

"How could this happen to Quil? I just don't see how this is fair," I said with a congested-sounding voice once I had finally stopped blubbering and was curled up on the couch waiting for Riley to bring me a cup of hot chocolate.

I could hear Riley's sigh as she came to stand in the doorway of the kitchen. "I didn't believe it at first either, but when Quil didn't help you out of the truck or walk you to the door like he always does, I knew it was real. I mean he's always on top of that protective shit."

"Yea," I mumbled, "It's really weird. I could probably go get a tattoo and drive a motorcycle and he would just be like 'Oh that's interesting. Now what's your name again?'"

Riley snorted and walked into the room holding two mugs that she set onto the coffee table. "Okay for one, you aren't old enough to get a tattoo and FYI I'm not signing off on that and two he knows your name."

I sagged against the couch miserably and she gasped. "Wait, he _does _know your name by now right? God if he can't even keep that straight—"

"No he knows my name, stop freaking out. It's just I want him to know my nicknames and my favorite movies and what kind of ice cream I like to get at Swirly's. I want my best friend back." I took a swig of hot chocolate and instantly regretted it after it burned off half of my taste buds. Riley was holding her mug with a thoughtful expression on her face.

"Yea, you want your _friend_ back. Righhht. I think we all know what you want Claire and it sure as heck isn't just a best buddy." Her face broke into a small smile and I tried unsuccessfully to pinch her leg with my toes.

"C'mon Ry I'm not even thinking about that! I just want him to remember who I am! Nothing else matters."

She took a sip of her hot chocolate and sighed. "Sure whatever. But seriously, have you thought at all about the fact that maybe this is a chance for you to be a little more independent?"

Anger rippled through me and I began to launch into a defensive rant before she held up a hand to stop me. "Okay wait, just hear me out! Obviously I'm upset about this whole thing too. I mean, Quil's practically a part of our family and I fully intend to help you figure out how to bring his memory back, _however_ for the time being I think you should use this opportunity wisely."

"_Opportunity_?" I all but snarled back at her.

"Well honestly you've always been so dependent on Quil that I worried about what you would do if something ever happened to him. I just think it might be good for you to try some things on your own for a while, without Quil constantly around. Maybe do some normal teenager stuff with other friends and not feel guilty because you know Quil is freaking out about it or stalking you as a giant wolf?"

"But I kinda like my stalker wolf..."

"Claaaire you know I'm right. So please don't mope around forever thinking that your life is over." She paused for a second to take a drink from her mug. "You can mope today though obviously." She nudged me with her elbow, waiting for a response out of me.

"I'll consider what you've said," I muttered before taking another sip of hot chocolate.

Riley chuckled a little. "You know I'm only saying this because I know Quil can't forget you for long. It's just not possible."

"I hope you're right."

"I know I am," she replied and I allowed her confident tone to bring me some comfort. After all, big sisters are older and wiser right?

_Sure Claire-bear._

The next day was pretty rough as I attempted to pay attention in class when all my mind wanted to focus on was the Quil situation. It got so bad after a while that I randomly answered "Operation Quicksand" when my history teacher asked me what the name of the famous German offensive launched at the end of WWII on the western front was. Apparently the correct answer was "Battle of the Bulge," and my 'attempt at humor' as my teacher put it, was not appreciated. Who the hell said I was _trying_ to be funny? Bitch.

Obviously by the time the end of the school day rolled around I was more than a little relieved. At least now I could go ponder the screwed up state of my relationship with Quil in peace.

_Wait a second…who is picking me up from school today? Quil doesn't know that he normally gives me a ride. Shit._

I suddenly felt like a complete idiot as I walked out into the parking lot. Instead of arranging a ride with my Aunt or one of the guys, I hadn't thought to ask anyone and was now stranded at school.

_Just lovely._

"Claire!" I jumped in surprise when a loud voice suddenly called out my name from close by. Turning to find the source of the sound, my spirits immediately lifted when I noticed Seth practically hanging out the window of his SUV.

"Sethy!" I called back gleefully and made a beeline for the passenger side door. "You seriously just saved my life. Thank you, thank you."

Seth let out a little laugh. "Always so dramatic."

"Nope being stuck at this school for a minute longer would have definitely been the death of me." I grinned over at him while we sped out of the lot and down the tree-lined road.

"Good thing Emily told me to come get you then huh?"

_Such a good Aunt. I should like bake her a cake or something!_

"Definitely," I replied, while my thoughts began to shift as they always did, to Quil. "So Seth, do you know what Quil's up to?"

Seth gave a fake pouty expression. "Well thanks Claire, I love you too."

"Oh be quiet I already praised you enough for the day! And besides, I'm just making sure he's adjusting well since his injury."

_Plus I already miss him like crazy._

Seth gave me a knowing smile that surprisingly shifted to a pensive look within a matter of seconds.

"Um what is _that_ _look_ for?" I accosted him when he didn't say anything he let out a sigh.

"Well I just thought about something," he mumbled, not looking at me. "Quil hasn't phased since his injury you know?"

I didn't understand what that had to do with anything, but I nodded hoping he would clarify. "So he hasn't had a chance to tap into the pack mind yet. Where all of our memories of the two of you are going to be waiting for him."

_Ohhh. _

It was something none of us had apparently considered until now, even though it was obviously right in front of our faces. Seeing evidence of the imprint through his brother's minds would definitely not fall under the 'casual, careful' approach Carlisle was advocating.

"How is he going to react to all that? I mean, what if he gets overwhelmed and like freaks out?" My questions came out urgently as I considered what this could mean for us.

Seth kept his eyes on the road and his expression stayed impassive. "I don't know. We'll have to be careful I guess and try not to give too much away when we're in wolf form?"

I scoffed at the idea, thinking about Collin and Brady attempting to control their minds. It was very unlikely, if not impossible.

"Or maybe…" Seth spoke slowly, "Maybe it'll be good if Quil phases. It could be what he needs to get his memories back, you never know. I say we just wait until he decides he feels like phasing again. I think Carlisle told him to take it easy for a while, but we both know that's not gonna stop him for long."

"Yea," I breathed, currently consumed by the thought of Quil's memory returning so easily.

_If only…_

I must have zoned out for a minute because the vehicle came to a halt and I looked up to see the familiar exterior of my house. "Okay hop out and grab your photo albums or whatever you want to show Quil and then book it back out here," Seth told me with a much lighter expression on his face than he'd had earlier.

"Why do I need to do that?"

He rolled his eyes at me in mock exasperation. "Because I'm taking you over to Quil's and you're gonna work on this Operation Sand thing or whatever Collin and Brady are calling it."

"Quicksand," I corrected him, while unbuckling my seat belt excitedly. I would get to see Quil!

Seth's eyebrows furrowed. "Do I even want to know what that's supposed to mean?"

"Don't worry it's nothing perverted or gross surprisingly!" I laughed and shut the door behind me before racing into the house and back to my bedroom where I knew my old photos would be. Grabbing a few albums, I was out of there and back into Seth's SUV in a matter minutes.

"Wow, that was like wolf-speed fast!" He exclaimed before we headed out again. Only a brief car ride later, and I was finally at the place I regarded as my second-home. It would be interesting to see how Quil would react to pages of photos that showcased us as the two peas in a pod we'd always been.

_Well, here goes nothing._

I let Seth lead the way and giggled when he made a big fuss of knocking loudly and ringing the doorbell even though we both knew the door was more than likely unlocked. Moments later a shirtless, sleepy-looking Quil was at the door glaring at Seth with a resentful expression while I stifled my laughter behind my hand.

_Damn, that boy is sexyyyy. _

I tried to keep my eyes from permanently affixing themselves to his Quil's abs, but it was a losing battle. They just couldn't be controlled.

"What the fuck Clearwater? I was napping," Quil growled out, interrupting my ogling and drawing my gaze up to his scowling face that still managed to look adorable when angry. Seth chuckled and grabbed my arm to pull me in front of him.

"Just came to drop off Claire. She's babysitting you for the day."

Quil's eyes widened as if just noticing that I was there and his hand rose up to scratch the back of his neck in what I knew to be a nervous habit. "Oh. Hi Claire."

"Hey Quil. Sorry for interrupting nap-time," I replied with a small grin. Seth laughed and started backing down the porch steps. Quil's eyes were still trained on my face and he didn't seem to notice the movement.

"Well I gotta go, have fun guys!" Seth called out before hopping into his vehicle and driving off leaving Quil and I awkwardly staring at each other. I unconsciously began inching the photo albums I had in my hands up higher and higher until they rested against my chin.

"So," I practically squeaked out, "I brought these for you." I thrust the photo albums out in front of me and he glanced down at them.

"Pictures?" Quil asked softly before grabbing them and opening up the one on top with the flip of his hand.

"Yep. Maybe we should go inside though to look at them? I can tell you about the pictures so it makes more sense." I waited nervously, hoping he wouldn't suddenly tell me to leave him alone.

"Sure, c'mon in," He replied after a moment's pause and I followed him into the house. At the sight of Quil and Embry's slightly messy living room my breath caught in my throat and I paused for a second. Only a few days ago Quil and I had been playing cards together at the coffee table and now I was trying to convince him that he knew me.

"Are you gonna come in?" Quil was staring at me quizzically, his arms crossed over his chest causing his biceps to bulge a little. I glanced down at the photo albums that he must have placed on the coffee table while I was reminiscing.

"Just taking my time, no worries," I responded with a smile that probably didn't reach my eyes. Quil uncrossed his arms and I suddenly froze again, distracted by his shirtless torso.

_This is not going to be a very productive visit if he keeps this up._

"Claire?"

I forced my eyes up to his face, but not before he noticed where I had been staring and he shifted uncomfortably. I could feel the heat rising to my face and I looked down at the ground in embarrassment.

I heard Quil let out a little cough. "I think I'm just gonna go grab a shirt real quick."

_Oh God. Now I'm a creeper._

I chanced a peek up at Quil's face and was surprised to see that instead of horrified or disgusted he looked…amused?

"Yea okay sure," I mumbled while he stepped toward the hallway.

"Just wait here Claire-bear."

_Claire-bear?_

My heart stopped.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Let the speculation on that one begin hehe. Sorry if this was kind of a boring chapter...I'm trying to move the plot along, but it's so easy to get bogged down grrr. Hopefully I can get things back to a speedier pace soon! A million thanks to all who reviewed the last chapter! Love you guys :) **


	9. Point Me at Lost Islands

**Chapter 9**

_By the look in your down-turned eyes,  
>you've had enough of these angry skies.<br>I can't wait just like you can't wait  
>until we're out, past familiar gates<em>

-Point Me at Lost Islands by Tired Pony

"Just wait here Claire-bear."

I was sure something exploded in my head as I watched Quil pad down the hallway like he hadn't just dropped a bomb on me.

_Does he remember? _

When Quil returned clad in an old shirt a few moments later I was frozen in place, likely with my mouth still gaping open in shock. He raised an eyebrow at me as he in took in my flabbergasted expression.

"Is there something wrong with this shirt? I mean I know it's old, but it's not that bad right?" He grinned at me and I sputtered unintelligibly. Did he seriously not realize that he had called me by my childhood nickname?

He cocked his head, obviously confused by my babbling. "What? English would be nice."

"What did you call me?" I managed to mutter a bit breathlessly. Quil's expression remained puzzled as he crossed his arms and leaned up against the wall.

"Um I didn't call you anything."

"No, before you got the shirt! You told me to wait here and…and…" I bit my lip, waiting for him to acknowledge that he had indeed called me Claire-bear and I wasn't just imagining things like a crazy person.

"I said 'wait here Claire' didn't I?" Quil asked me in a tone reminiscent of an older person humoring the pointless questions of a small child. I knew I should probably just drop it, but I couldn't. I needed to know.

"No you said something else…after the Claire…?" I questioned almost pleadingly.

"Uhhh…"

Realizing I wasn't getting anywhere, I let out a small sigh. "You called me Claire-bear. Like my nickname."

Quil regarded me skeptically and I felt a pang of disappointment as I internally acknowledged that he had obviously not regained any of his memory. "I did? Guess I didn't realize it."

"Yea. I mean, maybe I…heard you wrong? I'm not sure." Suddenly I was backtracking hoping to not give away how desperately I wanted him to remember. I watched as Quil shifted his weight from one foot to the other and looked up at the ceiling thoughtfully.

"Maybe it just slipped out? If it was something I called you a lot, I guess it's possible I said it without really thinking."

_I think 'a lot' may be an understatement._

"Well you _were _the one who came up with it so…" I trailed off with an amused tone. Quil's eyebrows shot up in surprise.

_Shit. Was that too much?_

"_I _came up with it?"

"Yea, you and…and the guys. A lot of them call me that too." Quil seemed to catch my overly hasty amendment, but didn't press for more information much to my relief.

"So do you want to check out the photos then?" He asked, pushing himself off of the wall and gesturing toward the albums on the coffee table. I perked up at the suggestion and nodded my agreement.

"Yea let's do this bitch!" I exclaimed and plopped myself onto my usual spot on the couch. Quil looked surprised again, before shaking his head a little.

_Crap I freaked him out again._

"What?" I questioned, genuinely interested in what he was thinking.

"You're kind of interesting," he responded hesitantly.

I frowned. "Interesting? That means _weird_, right?"

He broke into a grin and I ended up mimicking his expression with a matching smile of my own. "No, by interesting I mean you just surprise me sometimes. Your reactions to things are…unique?"

I groaned loudly. "Yep, you definitely think I'm weird!"

Quil chuckled while he walked over to join me on the couch. "I said _unique_."

"Okay everyone knows _unique_ is just polite-speak for weird as hell!" I tried to look offended, but ended up laughing along with Quil anyway. Honestly it felt kind of amazing to laugh with him again. Plus, the way his eyes crinkled up was just _so_ cute…

_Focus Claire. Need to jog his memory with those photos!_

"Okay enough with my weirdness, it's photo time!" I grabbed the first album and set it on my lap. After opening it up to the first page, I realized that Quil was too far from me to properly view the pictures up close and began to scoot in a bit closer to him. He noticed my shifting and mirrored my movement until we were only a mere foot or so apart. I could feel the heat radiating off of his body in waves and quelled my desire to snuggle into his side where I knew I would fit just right.

"So when are these pictures from?" Quil asked, pointing to the page that contained a few shots of me and my Aunt Emily and Uncle Sam from when I was in middle school. I had purposely brought some of my more recent photo albums to avoid possible awkwardness over the fact that he knew me since I was a toddler. Wouldn't want him thinking he was still my babysitter or anything like that!

"This is from when I was in the sixth grade," I responded and then turned the page, "And here's one of _you_. That's from when you and Embry were helping me with my science fair project."

Quil was viewing the photos with interest and I cringed when I noticed how chubby and awkward I looked during this stage of my life.

_A polka dot headband with a striped shirt? Seriously?_

"Wow I haven't aged a bit, have I?" Quil remarked sarcastically and I giggled.

"Well thank god _I_ have. Pre-teen Claire was kind of a fashion emergency."

Quil pointed a finger at my 11-year old self. "I don't know, she seems pretty cool to me."

I let out an incredulous snort. "Yea only a real trendsetter could pull off stripes and dots simultaneously."

"Well she did do a science fair project on the "Conservation of the Olympic Wolf," so she definitely has her priorities straight," Quil said in a very matter-of-fact voice.

"Yep. I think all of my firsthand experience with the _species_ made that one a no-brainer." I followed Quil's gaze to a photo of Embry and I holding up a shoebox containing a miniature forest and wolf pack. "Plus, Embry is a freaking genius with dioramas so my project pretty much owned that science fair."

Quil turned to me and made an incredulous noise. "What about me? I bet I could make an awesome diorama if given the chance."

"Um okay Mr. Hot-glue my fingers every five seconds—"

"You're making that up," he shot back.

Flipping the page, I smirked in triumph when I spotted a picture of Quil clutching a hot-glue gun with a grimace of pain on his face.

"You are what we like to call 'craft-challenged.' Very common among males."

Quil's expression was amused for a moment, before he glanced over to the adjacent page of pictures and his face turned curious.

"Who's that?"

"Oh that's my sister Riley. Remember I mentioned her yesterday?"

Quil gave a nod. "You guys look alike."

"Yea I guess so. We're both short, have the same hair color, and know how to have a good time!" I responded back with a chuckle and Quil turned toward me with a teasing glint in his eyes.

"I doubt she's as _unique_ as you though—"

"God, not the unique thing again!" I nudged his arm playfully with my elbow, before realizing it was probably a bit too early to be touching him. He didn't seem to notice though and just grinned while turning to the next page of pictures.

"So are these your parents?" Quil asked in a relaxed tone that should have been comforting to hear. Instead I felt my smile vanish as I looked at the old family portrait of my deceased parents, the painful ache becoming fresh again.

"Yes that's them," I responded with a thick voice that betrayed me. I could feel Quil's stare before he even spoke.

"What's wrong?"

I didn't look up to meet his gaze. "They died in a car accident five years ago."

Quil looked horrified and guilty and sad all at once. "Oh shit. Claire I…shit I'm so sorry," he said in a hurried voice. "If it wasn't for this memory loss crap—"

"Quil," I stopped him with a hand on his wrist. "It's fine. I'm totally okay, you don't need to apologize."

He looked skeptical and seemed to be searching my face for signs of an impending breakdown. "Okay. But I _am _sorry Claire."

"Yea me too. They were amazing and I still miss them. You really helped me get through the whole thing though…you know back then. You never let me give up." I realized I was being more honest with him than I had intended, but it was hard not to spill my guts when he stared at me with those warm, gentle eyes.

"_I_ did that?" He questioned softly and with a hint of disbelief that made me want to hug him. I needed to be careful though or he might get overwhelmed.

"You've always looked out for me Quil," I replied, figuring it was more or less the truth, but not intense enough to freak him out or anything. He looked away with a thoughtful expression and I realized then that I was still holding onto his wrist. I pulled my hand away with a twinge of regret.

"Please don't get all sympathetic and pitying on me now," I began in a lighter voice, hoping he wouldn't notice how forced it was. "I'm not going to lose it or anything so let's just move on to more pictures!"

"Sure," he mumbled back reluctantly.

Pages lined with photos of school plays, birthdays, and pack bonfires flew by easily, Quil occasionally asking questions or making funny little comments while I searched his eyes for signs of recognition. There didn't seem to be any, but I tried not to let it bother me.

_At least he's hanging out with me and seems pretty at ease._

"Okay so how old are you in these?" Quil's finger hovered over a group of images from a few years ago. I smiled as the memory of an old birthday flashed through my mind.

"This was at my fourteenth birthday party. I wanted to have all my friends from school come to the beach and have a big luau thing, but it ended up raining that day so I had to cancel it. To say I was upset would be a bit of an understatement."

Quil raised an eyebrow in my direction. "I don't know, you look pretty darn happy in this one."

The photo in question featured a younger me shoving a piece of chocolate cake onto Quil's face while I laughed hysterically. Another shot showed a grinning Quil retaliating by spreading frosting on my nose. Bottom line: it was as cute as a bunch of piglets having a pajama party. And it kind of made me want cake.

_Food can wait!_

"Well after the party got cancelled, you and the rest of the guys threw me this impromptu thing back at Emily and Sam's house. It actually ended up being one of the best birthdays ever."

"Did that have anything to do with the fact that you obviously got a huge kick out of attacking my face with cake?"

"You started it!" Quil barked out a short laugh in response and leaned in a little closer to me.

"I highly doubt that. You were definitely a trouble-maker… just look at that sinister expression right there!"

Without thinking, I grabbed the throw pillow near my side and whacked him in the shoulder with it. "Damn straight I was. Still am, actually!"

I registered that Quil seemed a little taken aback by how familiar and personal I acted around him, but he recovered quickly, glancing down at the photos rather than my face.

_Dammit Claire, tone down the buddy-buddy stuff._

"Why did this end up being one of the 'best birthdays ever' as you put it," he stated softly, still eyeing the images of us together. My palms were a little sweaty as I reached out to flip to the next page where I knew the answer would be clear.

"Wait, I thought you said the beach thing was cancelled?" Quil asked in confusion as he viewed the set of pictures.

"It _was_, but later on that evening it stopped raining so you, Embry and Seth went out to the beach and set up all the corny Hawaiian tiki stuff so that I could still have my luau. Then Aunt Emily brought me out there and the entire pack surprised me! It was amazing." I said the last part a bit reverently, still fond of the great memory.

Quil looked impressed. "Wow, it actually looks pretty cool. And is that…_Collin_ playing a ukelele?"

I giggled. "Yep. He was terrible though, so I don't know if it could really be considered _playing_."

"Not surprised," he muttered dryly.

"Plus," I continued in my description of why this particular birthday was so memorable, "you guys finally let me stay out all night like the rest of the pack does sometimes. At the time, that was a huge step for me."

Quil nodded his head in understanding and turned to the next page. I was surprised when he stiffened up almost imperceptibly and I wouldn't have caught it if I wasn't so attuned to his every movement.

_What's the problem?_

I peered down curiously at the album and froze when I saw the source of Quil's surprise. The scene was still from my birthday celebration, but it was obviously much later in the evening, pack members and some of the other girls huddled together on blankets around a bonfire.

_Oh crap._

I vaguely remembered that Brady and Collin had been fooling around taking pictures of people sleeping in weird positions, like Jared with his mouth wide open or Seth holding a bag of marshmallows like it was teddy bear. Instead of laughing at these embarrassing photos however, Quil was staring at one that featured him slumped against a log with me draped across his lap, both of us sound asleep. It wasn't sexual—I was 14 okay!—but the way Quil's arms were wrapped securely around my body and how I had my face snuggled into his chest looked very intimate.

"So uh we look like we were pretty close," he mumbled in a low voice and my heart rate began to spike as nervous energy flowed through me.

"We were yea," I whispered. He finally tore his eyes away from the photo and pinned me with a penetrating stare. I decided I needed to give a better explanation than that.

"I think it got pretty um cold that night so you were keeping me warm. You couldn't let the birthday girl freeze right?" I finished lamely and tried not to cringe at myself.

_Real smooth._

"Huh true," Quil replied in the same subdued tone and I twirled a section of my hair anxiously. His finger traced along the edge of the picture of us and I followed its path with my eyes in an enraptured daze.

_What is he thinking?_

"Want a sandwich?" I blurted out randomly when he didn't say anything else and the silence became too uncomfortable for me to bear. Quil seemed startled for a second before he shrugged and set the photo album onto the coffee table.

"I'm pretty much always up for a sandwich."

_Thank you lord._

I rushed to stand up, banging my knee against the coffee table in the process.

"Are you okay?" Quil asked as I hobbled off to the kitchen.

_Fucking hurts like hell!_

"Yea, doesn't even hurt!" I yelled back while yanking open the fridge in search of sandwich materials. I knew Embry usually bought ham and salami all the time so I was hopeful there would be some left. However when I rummaged through the usual drawer, I came up empty-handed.

"Quil, do you guys have any ham?" I called out with my head still practically in the fridge.

"Let me check." Quil's voice was suddenly close to my ear and I flinched in surprise. I hadn't even heard him come into the kitchen. I scooted backward a little to give him some space, but ended up brushing up against his chest in the process.

_Oh boy._

He stepped around me to search for the elusive lunch meats while I tried not to focus too much on how delicious his body had felt when I had touched him.

"Found it!" He exclaimed triumphantly and waved a bag of ham in front of my face.

"Yay time for some ham-sams!" I grabbed the deli meat out of his hands and started gathering the other necessary food supplies.

"Ham-sams?" Quil questioned in an amused voice while he watched me open a bag of bread.

"Y'know…like a Ham _sammich_. Obviously."

Quil chuckled and opened the fridge again to pull out some mustard. He turned to me then and I drank in the warmth coming from his wide grin. "So do you like mustard on your… ham-sam?"

_So. Flippin. Cute._

"Yes please," I replied almost shyly and Quil slid the mustard across the table toward me.

A few minutes later the sandwich-making process was complete and the two of us were busy digging into our meals at the kitchen table. I was still working on my one and only sandwich, while Quil was already on his second of three. Wolf appetites were no joke.

"So those pictures were interesting," he stated abruptly in between large bites. I paused my eating to stare at him in confusion.

_Interesting?_

"I mean it was weird seeing myself doing all these things I don't remember, but it looked like I was having fun for the most part."

I slowly nodded, wondering what he was getting at. "So did it help at all?"

He looked down at his almost finished sandwich with a frown. "If you're asking if it helped me remember anything then no, it didn't."

I had figured as much, but it still sucked hearing Quil confirm it. "No problem," I assured him. "It's not like I was expecting it to just all come back after looking at a few photos."

"I know," Quil muttered before taking another bite. He looked a little unsettled about the turn the conversation had taken and I silently wondered what I could do to fix things.

_Maybe he feels pressured to remember everything? I shouldn't have pushed him…_

"Claire?" I wanted to sigh at the sound of my name coming from his lips. It never ceased to affect me.

"Yea?"

"Maybe you could keep helping me out with this. Like show me more pictures and stuff sometime? Only if you feel like it though obviously." Quil's voice was casual, but he eyed me closely, waiting for my reaction.

_This is good. This is verrrry good._

I suppressed the ridiculous grin that was creeping over my face and tried to seem nonchalant. "Sure, I wouldn't mind."

Quil smiled and nodded. "Cool. I just want to get back to normal as soon as possible."

I shrugged like I was totally chill about him asking to spend time with me, but inside I was doing an elaborate victory dance.

_BOOYAH!_

"I'll stop by after school some more then if that works for you?" I asked him and then took a bite of sandwich to keep myself from smiling brightly like I wanted to.

"Sounds good." He smiled at me in an endearing way and I almost inhaled the grape juice I was drinking. All I could think about now was that I would get to hangout with Quil because he _wanted me to_! Yes, things were looking up at last.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Geeze I'm tired. I figured I should just stay up late and post this though, so if there's any weird errors blame my exhaustion, not me! Hope the Super Bowl was enjoyable for all you US readers who are actually into football...and please tell me someone laughed as hard as I did during the Madonna half-time show? It was freaking awkward as all get-out (ie-random dude with an afro doing flips on a tight-rope while madonna danced next to him? WTF? I was dying at that part).But yea back to relevant story things: I'm interested to see what people thought of this chapter since it was completely Quil/Claire stuff with no other distractions. BIG GIANT THANKS to all the lovely people who keep reading and reviewing this story! Much love to ya'll. **


	10. Realize

**Chapter 10**

_If you just realize what I just realized,  
>Then we'd be perfect for each other<br>And will never find another  
>Just realize what I just realized<br>We'd never have to wonder if  
>We missed out on each other now<em>

-Realize by Colbie Caillat

I didn't go over to Quil's the next day after school for a couple of reasons: 1. It was probably better to not go overboard with the memory-jogging. I mean, the boy could only handle so much in a short span of time. And 2. I had a school project to work on with one of my close friends, Irina.

_Yep, those are the only reasons…sure…_

Okay and more embarrassing reason 3. I was having trouble being around Quil without wanting to kiss him. After I did it for the first time before his memory loss I now knew what I was missing out on. It sucked.

Irina and I were currently hunkered down at my kitchen table with a pile of papers and books spread out before us in disarray. I watched as her hand flew furiously over a page with a purple highlighter and wondered what the hell could possibly be left to mark since she had been at it for at least 2 hours now.

"You know you're not supposed to highlight _every_ sentence right?" I muttered, waiting for her to look up at me with her signature exasperated expression. I was not disappointed. Irina groaned before throwing the highlighter down onto the book and pushing her thick-rimmed glasses up the bridge of her nose.

"At least I'm trying unlike someone else I know."

I attempted to look terribly offended. "You couldn't possibly be referring to _me_!"

My comment was met with a snicker and a piece of popcorn thrown at my forehead. "Oh please Claire, I think we both know what you're thinking about right now and it's definitely not related to _A Farewell to_ _Arms_ or any book for that matter."

_True._

"Well maybe if Ernest Hemingway had written about hot men I would be a little more interested, just sayin," I replied while tapping the cover of the book we were supposed to be analyzing. Irina shook her head, apparently surrendering to my "lack of motivation" as she so often called it.

"Speaking of hot men, where _is_ Quil anyway? Isn't he usually here at this time?"

My easy smile faltered at the question as I realized that I hadn't told her about Quil's current condition. It's not that she wasn't trustworthy or a good friend, it was just hard to explain when she had no idea that Quil turned into a wolf and fought vampires.

"He's just kind of busy these days I guess…" I trailed off in an overly casual tone that didn't go unnoticed by Irina. Her eyebrows rose above the dark frames of her glasses and she regarded me skeptically.

"This is _Quil_ we're talking about. He's never too busy for you."

I shrugged and reached over for a highlighter so that I would have something to focus on besides her questioning stare.

"Wait, did you guys like have a fight or something?" Irina's voice was immediately worried-sounding and it made me feel guilty for not explaining everything. She knew that Quil and I were best friends and also that I had a giant crush on him as well, but obviously I hadn't ever mentioned anything about imprinting.

"No, we're fine," I tried to reassure her. "We are just trying to focus on our own stuff right now though."

"Well okay I guess," Irina mumbled back, still looking as skeptical as ever. She grabbed a handful of popcorn and started munching on it with a thoughtful expression.

_Crisis averted..._

"So does this mean you'll have more time to hang out with _me_ now that you're not spending every second with Quil?"

I chuckled. "Sure. I guess you'll _have_ to do—"

"Hey be nice!" Irina exclaimed indignantly while I continued to laugh.

"You know I love you Rina. I mean, how else would I pass Calculus if you didn't force me to study with you!"

At the mention of Calculus, Irina's eyes suddenly filled with excitement and I wondered what she was up to. "What is that look for?"

"Talking about Calc just reminds me that I was supposed to tell you something!" She leaned forward from her spot at the table and began to speak in an almost hushed tone like she was telling a secret. "You know Nathan from math class?"

I nodded, still confused about the need for whispering when we were clearly alone in the house.

"Well he likes you!"

Irina sat still obviously waiting for me to react, but all I could do was shrug. She frowned and leaned forward even more. "_Claire_ aren't you excited? Nathan is really cute! I know like 10 different girls that would kill to go out with him."

_Huh. Nathan likes me?_

"Really? I guess I never noticed that he was interested." I wasn't lying. I hadn't ever paid him much attention because Quil was honestly the only guy I ever thought about.

"He's definitely interested, believe me. He told his best friend Wes, who told that bitch Shayla, who in turn told _me_ so it's legit don't worry."

I raised my eyebrows. "Right. _That_ sounds promising."

"Please don't get all sarcastic on me like you always do," Irina grumbled out with annoyance and I shrugged again. The whole thing was weird and I didn't really care if Nathan liked me or not. He was nice and all, but he wasn't Quil.

"I mean I know he's not Quil or anything," Irina began like she had just heard my unvoiced thoughts, " But give him a chance! Shayla's having that big party soon and I know he'll come if you do."

I sighed, realizing she wasn't just going to let this go. "Yea okay, maybe."

Irina squealed in excitement, obviously not caring that I wasn't sharing her enthusiasm.

"Great!" Suddenly I heard a buzzing sound and Irina pulled out her phone from her purse to read a text message.

"Ugh. I have to go, sorry Claire."

"But the project isn't even close to done!" I protested though she had already started gathering up her belongings.

"I know, but my Mom got called into work and someone needs to watch Calvin."

"Isn't he old enough to just chill by himself now?" I muttered, aggravated that I would now be stuck working on this without the fun distraction of a friend to make the time pass quicker. Irina rolled her eyes and slung her backpack onto one shoulder.

"Um Claire, he's 8 years old. He could like drink laundry detergent or something so no, he can't just 'chill by himself.' Don't worry though, I'll email you updates on the project while I'm working on it!"

Irina gave me a wave as she bounded out the side door, leaving me staring miserably at the pile of papers on the table.

_What kind of kid would drink laundry detergent? Ugh this sucks. I hate school. _

I let my face fall onto the book lying in front of me as I contemplated dropping out and bypassing the whole high school diploma thing. It didn't seem like such a bad option compared to studying the austere prose of Hemingway.

'_Austere prose?' I should write that down…sounds smart…_

I willed my hand to move the short distance to the pen lying inches away from it, but my nervous system didn't seem to want to comply. Instead, I realized how tired I actually was and started drifting off like I always seemed to do when trying to work on homework.

_Just a five minute brain-recharge. It'll be beneficial to the project._

I folded my arms on top of the book and rested my head there comfortably.

_Yesss fucking love naptime…_

I wasn't sure how long I slept there, but I do know exactly how I got woken up from my peaceful slumber. Jacob Black and Embry Call. Need I say more?

"Rise and shine Claire-bear!" Jacob's loud, obnoxious voice caused my eyes to snap open in frightened surprise. His grinning face was suddenly bent down close to mine.

"Have a nice nap?" He asked me in amusement and I raised my hand to swat him away.

"It was great until you ruined it!"

"So are you busy this evening?" Jake continued like I hadn't just expressed my anger toward him. I sat up with a loud sigh and gestured to the mess of school work on the table.

"This school project demands my attention."

"When did sleeping face-down on your book start counting as a project?" Embry piped up from across the kitchen alerting me to his presence for the first time.

"It's been an intense work session, I needed a rest!"

Embry and Jake both laughed and began helping themselves to the snacks I had spread around the kitchen. So much for my secret stash of junk food!

"So why did you guys come over here? I assume it wasn't just to bother me and steal my food," I muttered watching Embry eat the last of my popcorn.

"Well aside from _that_, we're here to pick you up! We're hanging out with Quil and you need to come too." Jake spoke sloppily with his mouth full and I cringed a little.

"But my homework—"

"It can wait!" Jake interrupted while Embry stood next to him nodding in agreement. Obviously they would not be taking no for an answer, but I knew I had to at least attempt to put my studies first.

_Well that's something you've never tried before!_

"C'mon Claire, you know how hard it is for me to be away from Nessie and yet here I am, staying in La Push to help you and Quil out! It's the least you could do…" Jake gave a pouty expression that looked out of place on someone built so large.

Embry was finally finished eating and he leaned on the chair across from my mine. "Plus Quil needs you to be there. It'll make him feel better."

Embry's words filled me with alarm and I was up out of my seat and standing before I even realized it. "What's going on with Quil?"

"He's been trying to phase all day, but he hasn't been able to," Jake responded.

My mind raced trying to come up with possible reasons why Quil would be having trouble with phasing, but none of them made much sense. "That's really weird. What did Carlisle say about this?"

_Maybe he still hasn't healed completely?_

Jake shrugged. "He seems to think it has something to do with the head injury, but honestly he's pretty much as clueless as the rest of us when it comes to this. I mean, this has never happened before."

"Maybe he just needs the right stimulus? Like getting really angry or something?" I offered, not feeling very confident in Carlisle's ability to fix the situation.

"We tried getting him angry, but it didn't' seem to do much. Hopefully it'll just take some time and he'll be back to normal," Jake sounded fairly confident, but I could tell both he and Embry were worried. I nodded as I considered what this new development meant. If Quil couldn't phase, he wouldn't be exposed to the memories of the pack mind that would show him our bond. Was this a blessing or a curse? I didn't know.

Embry—ever aware of the emotions of those around him—was watching me with a thoughtful expression and I tried to look relaxed for his sake.

"So are you coming with us Claire?" he asked while I threw an empty pretzel bag into the trash trying to distract myself from the questions bouncing around in my head.

"Yea if you think Quil wouldn't mind," I answered softly and Jake scoffed in response.

"Of course he won't mind! Whether he realizes it or not, you're the one person who can make him feel better."

I must have looked skeptical because Embry jumped in to second Jake's claims. "He's right Claire! Plus I know Quil likes you even with the memory loss."

"He does?"

Embry was nodding vigorously now like it would somehow make me believe him more. "Yes. He thinks you're funny. He told me."

"Really? He said that?" I questioned urgently, desperate for any indication that Quil was feeling something positive toward me. Jacob chuckled at my earnestness, but Embry was nice enough not to mock what was obviously important in my eyes.

"His exact words were 'Claire's funny. She calls ham sandwiches ham-sams.' And we all know that humor is _everything_ to Quil so…" Embry gestured with his hand as if to say that his point had made itself.

_Quil thinks I'm funny! _

Jake started chuckling again. "Don't hurt your cheeks from smiling too big okay?"

I hadn't even realized that I was grinning like an idiot, but I didn't care because Quil thought _I, Claire Young, _was FUNNY! I felt like I had won a gold medal or something.

"Now that you know Quil thinks you're cool, can we please get going?" Jake pleaded impatiently and I allowed him to pull me out of the kitchen to his car. Minutes later we were at Embry and Quil's house and I hopped out excitedly to run for the front door.

"Aww so excited… isn't she precious Embry?" I could hear Jacob laughing behind me and I glared at him from over my shoulder before wrenching the door open and walking into the living room. I looked around for Quil, but he wasn't anywhere to be found.

"Quil?" I called out just as Jake and Embry entered the house noisily.

"Stop moping and come chill with us!" Jake shouted in the direction of the hallway and I realized that Quil must be in his bedroom. I heard a door open and moments later Quil was standing only feet away. Just seeing him made me sigh in relief.

_I missed him._

"I wasn't moping," Quil muttered while he stretched his arms over his head.

Jake was grinning at him. "Whatever you say."

Quil's eyes fell on me and I offered a small smile in greeting. "Hi Quil."

"How's it going Claire?" He responded with a small smile of his own and I felt my heartbeat increase. Embry noticed it and glanced down at me, smirking.

"I'm great. Just getting dragged around by these two."

They all chuckled, but I really only heard Quil's.

_He thinks I'm funny. Must. Stay. Funny. _

"It's not like you wouldn't have ended up here anyway…" Jake mumbled without thinking about the connotation of his words and I watched Quil's face hoping he wouldn't notice.

"Oh you know that Claire is supposed to come help jog my memory?" Quil asked casually, obviously misinterpreting Jake's words. He didn't understand that I felt an overwhelming desire to be around him pretty much every moment of the day.

Jacob didn't let on anything as he responded. "Yea exactly."

"So how're you doing today Quil?" I asked, hoping to get away from this turn in the conversation. I immediately regretted asking however, when Quil's expression noticeably darkened.

_Shit, he's still upset about the phasing issue!_

"They told you didn't they?" Quil questioned accusingly, looking back and forth between Jacob and Embry. I held up my hands in a placating gesture that appeared to go ignored by the ticked off wolf in front of me.

"Okay you know that no one in this family can keep secrets and why does it matter if I know you can't phase anyway?"

Quil grumbled and crossed his arms. "I _can_ phase, just not right now…"

"Of course you can! It might just take some time okay?" I didn't really know what I was saying at this point, but the words seemed to mollify Quil to my relief.

"Yea, okay," Quil began muttering and he walked over to plop down onto the couch. Embry nudged me and I looked up to see his expression which clearly said 'I told you so.' He apparently believed I was still able to calm Quil down like no one else could.

_Who knows? Maybe I still do affect him a little?_

"So more pictures today?" Quil stared up at me expectantly and I felt the beginnings of an idea forming in my mind.

"Actually I was thinking it might be good to do something different."

"Different?"

I grinned over at him, excited at the prospect of my plan. "Pictures can only go so far. I think we should get out and just _experience_ the memories."

Quil's brow furrowed, but he looked intrigued by my words. "And how do we do that?"

"Grab your towel, we're hitting the beach!" I exclaimed, earning surprised looks from the guys around me.

"It's not exactly warm outside, you know that right?" Jacob intoned softly, but I shushed him with a flick of my hand. This was _my_ plan and he wasn't going to question it!

Quil's expression was difficult to read. "Why the beach?"

"We have a lot of memories there together," I answered, thinking fondly back to the countless days we had spent there over the years. "Plus it's a little bit sunny today so we should probably take advantage of that."

Embry peeked over at the window and frowned when he noticed gray skies. So my definition of 'sunny' was a bit liberally applied. Sue me. If that's what it took to get a certain amnesiac half-naked out on the beach I had no qualms about exaggerating the weather conditions.

"Well alright. Why not?" Quil finally agreed to the idea and triumph surged through me.

"What about you guys?" I turned to Jacob and Embry and watched as they silently communicated. Jacob nodded almost imperceptibly at Embry before meeting my gaze.

"Yea we'll go Claire-bear," he answered and I saw Quil perk up out of the corner of my eye at the mention of my nickname.

_He must remember that I accused him of using it yesterday._

"Great, I'll just go grab a swimsuit from Quil's room and then we'll head out!"

"From _my _room?" Quil questioned in obvious surprise and I froze, realizing my mistake.

_Oh god._

"Uh…yea I left a suit in your closet once and I think it's still there?" I explained, feeling the blush rising embarrassingly to my cheeks. Embry and Jake exchanged amused glances beside me.

"Oh, well I'll help you find it," Quil replied as he rose from the couch. I waited for him to start walking down the hallway before I followed him. When we made it to his room, I paused in the doorway taking in the familiar sight and feeling a weird sense of nostalgia. It felt like ages since I had been back here.

_Still looks the same…_

Quil cleared his throat and gestured toward the open closet. "Go ahead and look. I'll grab some swim trunks while you're at it."

I nodded and walked over to the closet where I knew one of my spare suits would be somewhere on the back shelves. Quil was rummaging through a drawer loudly behind me. I easily found the modest purple tankini and shuffled out to where Quil already had a pile of clothes lying on the floor.

"Need help?" I chirped.

Quil groaned. "I swear somebody moved my swimming trunks…they should be right here…"

_The only person who would steal them is me and sadly enough, I'm innocent.  
><em>

"You know you might not remember, but…" I spoke mischievously as a rather perverted idea ran through my head, "The swim trunks aren't necessary. You always just swam without them in the past."

Quil's head snapped around to gawk at me and I burst into laughter when I saw the horrified look on his face.

"_Joking_ Quil. Just joking."

He let out a small sigh of relief before chuckling lightly. "Good because I'd rather not be the weird naked guy at the beach."

My brain cried a little at the image that statement evoked.

"Found them!" Quil yelled proudly while holding up a simple pair of black swim trunks. "Let's go!"

We made our way back to the living room where Jacob and Embry appeared to be recovering from a fit of silent laughter. I eyed them quizzically, waiting for an explanation, but Jacob simply whipped his keys out and started moving toward the door.

"I'll drive," he called out while a bemused-looking Quil followed closely behind him. I was about to do the same when I felt Embry tug on my arm. He was having a hard time keeping a straight face.

"Did you seriously just try to convince Quil to swim naked?" He asked in a mixture of amusement and disbelief.

I shot him a devilish grin. "Well, it was worth a shot."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: ****Sorry for the long wait! I had a very busy week and then a pretty epic birthday weekend that took some time to recover from. Tequila is not my friend apparently... So hopefully you enjoyed this and I want to hear from you wonderful readers please! Think of it as a Valentine's gift? Hugs and Kisses and CHOCOLATE to youuuu! :D**


	11. Somewhere Only We Know

**Chapter 11**

_Oh simple thing, where have you gone?  
>I'm getting old and I need something to rely on<br>So tell me when you're gonna let me in  
>I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin<em>

-Somewhere Only We Know by Keane

So the beach ended up being a little too cold which kind of screwed up my plan. Instead of lounging around in my bathing suit that would accentuate my very modest curves, I was forced to wear pants and a sweatshirt that hid everything. I looked like a man actually and last time I checked Quil wasn't into that.

"Not going swimming Claire?" Jacob called over to me as I dipped my toes cautiously into the freezing cold water. The temperature difference was enough to send a large shiver up my spine and I retracted my foot away from the surf as quickly as possible.

"I think I'll pass. Hypothermia would probably suck."

"It was _your_ idea to come here remember?" Jacob's mocking laugh caused me to glare at him reproachfully.

I walked over to where the three of them were goofing around with a volleyball that I had insisted on grabbing before we left. My freshman and sophomore years of high school had included a short-lived volleyball obsession and the beach had been my favorite place to practice with Quil. It wasn't the most memorable experience we had shared here, but it was a starting point I supposed.

_If I can get them to actually take it seriously!_

"Heads up!"

I barely had time to react as the white ball sailed toward my face with alarming speed. Luckily Embry jumped in front of me at the last minute and batted it away before it could make contact.

"What the hell Jake? Were you _trying _to hit her?" Quil's voice wasn't angry or panicked like it normally was whenever one of the guys did something that endangered me. He just sounded a bit confused.

"Just messed up my aim. Sorry Claire."

I looked over at Jake and was surprised to see him grinning. _Had_ he been trying to hit me?

"Whatever," I began with a shrug of my shoulders, "Let's play a game. Two on two!"

Jacob and Embry did another one of their weird, secret nod things before Embry yelled out, "I call Jake!" and they began to set up the ratty net that we always brought along to play with.

_What is with those two?_

I turned to face Quil and couldn't help scowling when I noticed how annoyed he looked. He obviously didn't want to get stuck with me on his team.

"Hey don't start pouting about getting me as a teammate. I'm actually pretty darn good at volleyball."

Quil raised his eyebrows skeptically. "Yea, but against two wolves?"

"Part of the rules is that you guys have to tone down the supernatural athleticism so it's fair." I shot back. I hadn't even realized it, but my hands were now planted firmly on my hips and I was glaring at him defiantly.

_Nobody doubts my skills!_

"Okay whatever you say," Quil replied while a grin slowly spread over his face. I admired it for a moment before I shook my head and ran over to grab the volleyball. Jacob and Embry finished setting up the net a minute later and the four of us took our positions on either side of it.

"I don't know if this is even Embry," Jake taunted while I tossed the ball up and down in my hands, preparing to serve. "Maybe the three of us should just play together to make it fair. Claire's kind of a pro."

Quil laughed and turned to regard me for a second. "Yea she looks like a real killer!"

I bristled as I realized that Quil obviously thought I was too small and weak to play with them. Not that I was some star athlete or anything, but was it too much to ask to want to play a game with friends?

The ball was out of my hand and flying toward the back of Quil's head before I could even process what I was doing. It struck the intended target with a resounding smack.

"What was that for?" Quil rounded on me angrily while rubbing the back of his head. I shrugged my shoulders innocently, trying not to laugh like Jake and Embry were doing unabashedly.

"It just slipped from my frail fingers I guess. I'm surprised you even felt it though…my serve is very _delicate_ after all."

Quil looked a little surprised at my antics, but recovered quickly, picking up the ball and tossing it at me with more force than was probably necessary. I tried not to appear thrown off balance by the unexpected impact, but ended up wobbling a bit.

"Try to aim for the other team okay?" He said with a smirk and even though he was being kind of a jerk, it was pretty sexy.

_Focus. You need to impress him with your badass volleyball abilities._

"Can you guys stop flirting and serve the damn ball already?" Jake yelled out and I cringed before shooting daggers at him with my eyes.

"Oh shut up Black. She's just warming up!" Quil's flippant retort sounded relaxed and casual, but it caused a flash of disappointment to course through me. He obviously didn't regard what we had been doing as flirting and wasn't interested in me in that way at all. God it sucked.

"Okay I'm serving!" I alerted the guys while throwing the ball into the air and sending it sailing over the net. Embry sent it back over easily and Quil was on it before I could even blink, let alone move.

"Got it!"

"Hey, no super wolf speed allowed!" Jake shouted loudly as he dove to get the ball before it struck the sand. He wasn't quick enough however and Quil let out a victorious yell.

"1 point to us!"

Quil's remark caused Embry to shake his head in obvious disagreement. "Doesn't count if you cheated."

"I didn't cheat!"

"Uh yea you did."

I rolled my eyes at their stupid argument, but knew I would have to step in if I wanted it stop sometime this year. "Okay we give up the point!"

Quil glanced back at me, obviously a little put out by my decision. "Don't worry Quil," I assured him, "We won't need any freebies after this next serve!"

I picked up the ball again and served with as much force as possible, hoping it would at least make them work for it. Apparently Jake forgot the whole no-wolf-stuff rule though because he whacked it back over the net with so much force that it looked like a torpedo flying through the air. And it was soaring straight toward me of course.

_Fuck…_

"Watch out Claire!" Quil yelled before he jumped in front of me and tried to send it back over. The hit was much too low though and the ball ended up hitting the top of the net instead.

"Oops!" Jake called out far too innocently.

_Oops?_

"What happened to the rule asshole?" Quil grumbled as he went to grab the ball. I sent Jake a disapproving glare, but he simply winked at me in response. What the hell was going on?

"Our serve!" Embry chirped happily like I hadn't almost been nailed in the face with a projectile.

_They are __**so**__ up to something!_

The game continued with the guys getting increasingly more dangerous with each play. Obviously they weren't attempting to adjust down to my human level, but were instead trying everything possible to best one another. This unfortunately rendered my normally awesome serves ineffective against Jake and Embry and allowed them to hit back with alarming speed. It also meant that Quil ended up throwing himself between me and the ball pretty much constantly.

"Shouldn't you let Claire get one?" Jake called to Quil after he had dove in front of me once again. Quil let out an incredulous sound as he got back to his feet and wiped the sand off of his body.

"Maybe if you guys were playing fair then I would!"

Jake shrugged, grinning like Quil's accusations didn't bother him in the slightest. "Okay fine. Let's all just agree to calm things down and let Claire in on the fun."

"Um hellooo I'm right here. I think I can handle a game of volleyball thanks," I said full of bitterness. I hated when they treated me like a little kid.

Jake chuckled and twirled the ball in his hands. "Sure, sure Claire-bear. Of course you can."

"Just serve the damn ball!" I yelled, bristling with pent up energy at his mocking tone. They were so going down!

Jake complied and soon the white orb was sailing toward me once again, but this time at a more reasonable speed. I sprang forward, ready to strike and jumped up with my hands held high. Right before I could act however, Quil's body flew into my path and knocked the ball away.

"What the hell! I _had_ that one Quil!" I shouted and gave him a small kick to the back of his leg.

"Yea _Quil_, it wasn't even going fast," Embry drawled from his position across the net. Quil had the decency to at least look sheepish. He raised his hand to scratch at the back of his neck as he turned toward me.

"Sorry," he mumbled, "Just used to doing it now I guess."

It was so hard to stay irritated with him when pretty much everything he did was so endearing. I could feel my severe expression softening as I met his apologetic stare.

"Oh…well let me get the next one okay?"

Quil gave a quick nod and we were back in the game again. I was ready for Jake's next serve and Quil didn't interfere as I volleyed it back with more force than I think Embry was prepared for. He fumbled the return hit and I earned my first real point.

"Way to go Claire!" Quil cheered and slapped my hand in an exuberant high-five.

"That's right bitches!" I punctuated the statement with a fist pump and ignored Jake's eye-rolling.

The game continued back and forth, Quil and I finally working as a team rather than a solo Quil show, until the score was eventually tied up.

"Okay guys," Jake began, "This is game point. Losers have to go back to Quil and Embry's and get us all lunch and winners can just stay here and chill."

Embry piped up his immediate agreement and before Quil and I could speak, Jake was serving.

"I've got it!" I yelled and began running before even noticing that the ball was whizzing through the air with supernatural quickness.

"Claire no!"

Instead of the ball striking my face, I felt a hard body crash into me, sending me sprawling onto the sand with it on top. Quil's large form was lying completely over mine with his arms braced on either side of my head and our legs tangled up in a heap. I could feel the heat radiating off of him as I tried to control my breathing that was coming out in quick pants against his shoulder.

_Breathe in. Breathe out. In. Out. In… Holy shiznit he feels amazing!_

I inhaled through my nose and got a whiff of his musky, man scent that immediately sent my heart into a fluttering fit.

"Hey are you okay?" Quil breathed close to my ear as he began raising himself off of me.

_I don't think 'okay' is the right word._

I tried nodding my head because I didn't trust in my ability to form a coherent sentence, but it must not have been noticeable enough because Quil gave my shoulders a small shake as if to rouse me.

"Claire? Can you hear me?"

"Mmmyeaa," I rasped out with difficulty. A wonderfully hot hand suddenly moved under my neck with impossible gentleness and I shivered.

"Can you open your eyes?"

_My eyes are closed? _

I blinked and took in the sight of Quil's worried face hovering closely over mine.

_Oh, guess they __**were**__ closed. How strange._

"Are you hurt?" Quil was practically whispering to me and I continued staring at him like a love-sick puppy. It probably should have made me embarrassed, but I kept doing it anyway because I apparently have no shame.

"I'm totally fine," I mumbled while my racing heart attested to the opposite.

Quil sighed almost imperceptibly before I let him help me up into a sitting position. I finally noticed that Jake and Embry were standing close by watching our exchange interestedly.

"You know Quil, she's not a leech or anything. You didn't need to attack her," Embry remarked with a fake serious tone that resulted in Quil calling him a rather unpleasant swear word and Jake giggling like a 5 year-old.

"You guys all suck," I muttered while attempting to stand. Quil's hands were on my forearms, hoisting me up in a flash before I could even complete the action.

"I didn't mean to tackle you Claire," Quil said close to my face, "Sorry about that."

I was immediately mesmerized by his chocolate brown eyes and my nod was a bit belated as I continued to stare into them. Quil smiled in relief and stepped away causing me to make a small sound of protest against the loss of his warmth. An amused snort sounded out and I glanced around Quil to find its source. Jake and Embry looked pleased as fucking punch.

_Bastards._

"You know you forfeited the game just now, right?" Quil's voice was uncompromising as he addressed his two friends standing nearby with matching grins. "So you two are going to get lunch for us just like the losers you are."

"Fair enough!" Embry piped up and he and Jacob practically sprinted to the car.

Quil looked completely confused as he watched them pull away, leaving us standing alone on the beach. I chuckled nervously, now realizing that Jacob and Embry had obviously been planning this whole thing all along, including getting Quil to tap into his protective instinct by launching volleyballs at my face.

_I guess that's kind of nice in a misguided, asshole-ish sort of way?_

"They're being weirder than usual," Quil observed in a thoughtful voice and I shrugged, hoping to appear as naïve as possible.

"Huh yea. Who knows?"

Quil's eyes shifted to look further down the sandy expanse and I followed their gaze. "Wanna walk down the beach?" I questioned, hoping intensely that he would agree.

"Sure," he replied to my delight and I began to reach over for his hand like I always did whenever we walked like this together. Thankfully I realized my mistake and pulled my fingers back before they came in contact with his.

_Gahhh too close!_

We meandered slowly along the surf, both caught up in our own thoughts and I let myself imagine that things were back to normal between us. All I had to do was ignore the coldness of my lonely hand and it wasn't too difficult to pretend that Quil had never forgotten me or our memories.

"So did we come here together a lot?" Quil's deep voice broke the silence and I was abruptly returned to reality.

"Yes," I responded in a soft voice. "All the time."

Quil shoved his hands into his pockets and stared directly ahead while I watched him out of the corner of my eye. "What kinds of stuff did we do?"

I paused mid-step to ponder the question and Quil continued on walking. "Well, I swam and went cliff diving while you made sand castles and worked on your tan."

Quil let out a short bark of a laugh before pivoting on his heel so that he could face me. "I'm supposed to believe _that_?"

"Have I ever proven myself untrustworthy?"

Quil scrutinized me for a second. "You _did_ tell me that I didn't wear swim trunks at the beach so…."

_Yes I am in fact a perv, glad you recognize that._

I could feel a hint of color rise to my cheeks at his comment, so I turned to face the water hoping he wouldn't notice it.

"The Quil I know could always keep up with my humor!" I remarked to him from over my shoulder before I used my foot to splash some of the ocean water at his body. It barely wet his t-shirt, but he tried to appear shocked anyway.

"That's it!" He called out grinning. "I don't know about the Quil _you_ know, but _this_ Quil doesn't take shit from anyone."

I didn't have time to react before Quil was suddenly gripping my upper arms from behind and shoving me further into the water. I struggled for a second, pushing my body back against him, but he just laughed and continued forcing me forward.

"Quil! Stop it!" My cries were interrupted by ridiculous giggling that betrayed my true feelings toward the situation. Quil was touching me and he was doing it _voluntarily_. Did life get any better than this?

"It's just water Claire-bear!"

_Claire-bear? Okay yes, life __**could**__ get better._

The water was up to my knees now, effectively soaking the bottom half of my jeans, but Quil didn't look like he was intending on stopping anytime soon.

"Seriously Quil! I'm gonna be freezing after this!" I pleaded, craning my neck awkwardly to look up at him standing behind me. His eyes were lit up in obvious amusement and it reminded me so much of how we had always joked around together that my breath caught in my throat uncomfortably.

"Okay Claire," he drawled with a smirk, "I guess you've had enough for today."

His grip on my arms loosened and I stumbled forward, splashing water noisily. "Race you back to the shore!" I yelled before taking off with all the grace of a three-legged dog. Quil easily fell into stride beside me.

"You're pretty competitive aren't you?" He asked with a cocked eyebrow after we had reached the sand a few seconds later. I shrugged, unsuccessfully managing to contain the wide grin from spreading across my face.

"A little."

He snorted. "I saw your game-face during that volleyball game! You were totally in it to win it."

"Is it bad that you kind of sound like a cheerleader when you say that?"

Quil's eyebrows scrunched together as he regarded me like I was some confusing math problem. "Seriously, where do you come up with this stuff?"

_Boy, do NOT try to understand my crazyass brain._

"It's a talent, what can I say?" I responded with a wink.

"So is this what we did all the time?" Quil asked looking thoroughly amused. "You made lame jokes and I pitied you enough to be nice and tolerate them?"

"Not entirely. There was definitely some shell-finding, volleyball playing, and intense hot-dog eating in there too, but yea lame jokes were definitely involved."

"Hotdogs? I could get behind that idea," Quil intoned excitedly and I rolled my eyes.

"It's always about the stomach, isn't it?" I remarked while Quil nodded. Suddenly his countenance perked up and he turned back to where the volleyball net had been abandoned. I immediately noticed Jake and Embry walking over with bags of food in hand.

"Let's eat!" Jake shouted and we jogged over to meet them. Embry's eyes flicked between Quil and I, obviously wondering how we had handled ourselves on our own, before trailing down to my wet pant legs.

"Decided to go swimming after all?" He asked casually, causing Quil to chortle.

"_Somebody_ thought it would be funny to push me in." I looked at Quil with an accusing glare, but ruined the effect when my lips started quirking up into a smile. Jacob's eyes lit up gleefully as he observed our interaction.

"Yea I'm sure that was complete torture for you Claire," he said in a voice dripping with sarcasm.

_Dammit Jacob Black!_

"Well not eating in the next minute will be torture for _me_, so let's get on that yea?" Quil remarked, effectively saving me from more embarrassment. He grabbed a plastic bag from Jacob's hand and examined the contents inside. My mouth instantly began watering after he pulled out a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos. They were pretty much my favorite chip of all time.

"Want to share with me Claire?" Quil asked, holding the blue bag out to me in offering. The statement was basically tantamount to asking me to share a future with him for eternity. Wolves do NOT share food unless forced.

"Yes," I breathed out like I was accepting a marriage proposal. "I am unconditionally and irrevocably in love with Cool Ranch Doritos."

Jake and Embry exchanged matching confused expressions while Quil handed the bag over to me. "They're you favorite right?"

"How did you know that?" I clutched at the bag earnestly and began searching Quil's face. He cocked his head to the side and made a clicking sound from between his teeth.

"Lucky guess?"

I sighed from deep in my throat, feeling as torn as ever about what was happening with Quil's memory. Did he remember things about me or not? I don't think he even knew the answer.

"Very lucky," Jake muttered while staring pointedly in my direction. I looked away.

_Can't worry too much about forcing him to remember…_

I would have to be patient until all the small details came together in Quil's mind to form the perfect picture of me. After all, you can't rush fate.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Mehhh another longer break between updating. My bad. This chapter seriously did NOT want to be written for some reason, so if it's not up to par, that's prob why lol. Next update should be much, much sooner so look forward to that. Also random tangent: My mother bought me the Breaking Dawn dvd for Valentine's Day and I watched it this past weekend alone in my apartment. And guess what? The birth scene STILL scared the crap out of me even though I knew it was coming! Like ohmygod why is it sooo terrifying? I may have been hiding my face in a pillow, but I'll never admit to that of course. My dreams of being a mom have been forever destroyed...Thanks Stephenie M. haha :) **

**Reviews are my motivation! Please continue to spoil me with all your amazing comments! **


	12. Boomerang

**Chapter 12**

_You pull me in close, you throw me away  
>I keep coming back like a boomerang<br>You tell me to go, you beg me to stay  
>I keep coming back like a boomerang<em>

_Around, around, around and back again_

-Boomerang by Plain White T's

It was finally Friday afternoon and I couldn't wait to get out of school to see Quil again. Ever since our time at the beach a few days ago, Quil seemed more comfortable around me and I felt like we were on our way to really becoming friends again. It was all I could hope for at this point, seeing as his memory didn't seem to be returning any time soon.

_Keep it positive!_

Releasing a drawn out sigh, I glanced up at the clock hanging in the front of the classroom and noted there were still a few minutes left before I could escape.

"Claire!" A harsh whisper caught my attention and I turned toward the direction it came from. It was easy to spot my friend Irina grinning at me from a few seats over, a folded piece of paper held between two of her fingers.

I raised my eyebrows as if to ask what the hell she wanted and she extended the paper out for me to take. Trying to be as inconspicuous as possible, I reached over to grab it while keeping one eye on my lecturing teacher.

_Now what couldn't wait until class was over?_

I unfolded the note carefully and scanned it. The contents were as scatterbrained and borderline ridiculous as Irina herself was:

_Claire! Shayla's party is only ONE WEEK away! I was thinking Quil or one of your he-man friends (ie- BRADY CUZ HE IS GORGEOUS, but I'm willing to settle for any of them really) could drive us so my mom doesn't know I'm going! Thoughts? Also we need to plan outfits ASAP. I'm thinking it's time to sex you up so you can get a little action with Nathan. He would totally go for it! And don't try to get out of this because I know you don't have any plans! Watching Quil eat a pizza doesn't count as plans BTW. Sooo excited! Write back bitch._

The bell rang just as I finished reading the note and I shot up out of my seat, ready to bolt before Irina could pounce on me.

_God I fucking forgot about that dumb party! _

"Claire, don't you dare run out of here!" Irina called out to me as she suddenly placed a restraining hand on the top of my backpack. I groaned, realizing there was no way out of this now.

"I was just trying to beat the rush…you know how crowded these halls can be!"

Irina huffed. "Liar. I know you, you're trying to bail out on planning for the party."

"I never even agreed to going you know," I muttered as we exited the classroom and began navigating the short path to the exit. Irina had relinquished her hold on my backpack in order to grip her cellphone which her fingers were now fluttering over busily.

"Okay, so I texted Shayla that you and I were coming…" she prattled away, obviously distracted, "I don't think we should get there too early though. Don't wanna appear overeager or anything…"

I shook my head, wondering why something that seemed rather stupid was apparently important enough for Irina to completely obsess over. Irina had always been a somewhat nerdy, but absentminded type of person, who always wanted to fit in with the more popular group at school. Up until this year she hadn't been very involved with them, but now that they were showing her a little interest she had jumped on it eagerly.

_And I have to suffer because of it…_

"Claire, did you hear me?"

I glanced over at Irina who had paused in her relentless texting to stare at me with an exasperated expression.

"Sorry, what?"

She exhaled a loud rush of air out of her lungs before continuing on about some party details that were 'very important and not to be forgotten.' I listened halfheartedly while we made our way through the parking lot in search of our respective rides.

"So do you think one of your guys can drive us?" Irina asked hopefully as she started to open the door of her mom's van.

_I'm sure that's exactly what the pack wants to do on a Friday night…chauffeur little Claire-bear to her first house party!_

I furrowed my eyebrows to look like I was actually considering the idea, when in reality I was definitely not asking them to drive me. "Maybe…I'll ask, but they're uh pretty busy these days."

Irina rolled her eyes. "Just ask Quil. He'll do anything for _you_!"

She didn't wait for my answer and hopped into the car, leaving me muttering under my breath in the parking lot. Partying with a bunch of people I didn't especially like wasn't exactly my idea of a fun time, but I guess I would have to suck it up for Irina's sake. I spotted Riley's car a few seconds later and soon we were pulling out of the school lot and headed back home.

"Are you hanging out with Quil today?" Riley questioned as we pulled up in front of the house. I shrugged noncommittally despite the fact that I had been waiting all freaking day just to see him.

"Probably."

"Try to at least pretend to do some homework first please? I'll feel kind of responsible if you start failing classes," she replied with an airy laugh that reminded me of my mom. I pushed away the sobering thought before stepping out of the car.

"I've never failed anything so quit your worrying," I remarked from over my shoulder at her and grinned when she shook her head. Sometimes she was such an older sister.

_Now how long do I have to do homework so that she won't bug me for going to Quil's?_

The answer to that question turned out to be around 2 hours. At least, that's what I think it was…it felt more like 2 _years_. After getting Riley to finally agree to drive me over, I texted Embry and let him know that I was coming by like I had every other day this week. I didn't wait for him to reply.

_Hopefully Quil will be in a good mood…_

Though Quil had been increasingly friendlier toward me during our visits together, I could still sense a growing unease that seemed to be building up inside of him. Unfortunately his memory wasn't improving and he still hadn't phased despite great efforts to do so. Quil hadn't brought it up around me much, but I knew him well enough to recognize that he was frustrated and I wondered if there was anything I could do to help.

_Why can't he just phase? It doesn't make sense._

"Claire are you getting out or what?" Riley quipped beside me, alerting me to my surroundings. Upon seeing Quil and Embry's small house, I quickly unbuckled my seatbelt and hurried out of the car with a short 'love you, bye!'

_Finally, the best part of the day!_

"Honey I'm home!" I yelled out as I barged through the door noisily. Surprisingly, the living room was empty and I glanced around wondering why Quil and Embry weren't playing some violent video game or watching sports.

"Guys?" My voice echoed through the house, but was met with nothing. "Where the hell are they?"

I reached into my pocket for my cellphone and frowned when I saw a notification alerting me that I had a text message. It was from Embry.

_Don't come over right now. I'll call you in a few—E_

I had missed Embry's message in my haste and now felt completely puzzled. What was going on that he didn't want me visiting?

I walked hesitantly into the kitchen, wondering if my usual enthusiasm to see Quil had unwillingly caused me to make a big mistake. My thoughts fluttered through possibilities that could explain the empty house before settling momentarily on the image of the vampire that had almost claimed my life.

_It couldn't be, could it?_

A sharp current of fear pulsed through my body at the image and I froze, waiting for it to subside. I had pushed my near-death encounter to the back of my mind in favor of worrying over Quil, but now that I really focused on it I realized that the terror I had experienced was still rather fresh.

_Don't think about it. Think of something else. NOW._

My mind didn't comply with my harsh demands and I was surprised to notice that my skin had already broken out into a cold sweat. It was unsettling to say the least.

"This is bullshit!" A somewhat muffled voice sounded from outside and I immediately recognized it as Quil's. My ridiculous fear forgotten, I rushed to the window to scan the backyard and was met with the sight of Quil pacing back and forth in obvious anger.

_What's going on?_

I hurried through the house so that I could I exit out the sliding back door and noticed that Embry was out there too as I pushed it open. The sound of the door opening alerted the guys to my presence and they both turned to look at me with surprised faces.

"Claire?" Embry intoned in a low, measured voice that filled me with unease. "I told you not to come right now."

Quil let out a humorless laugh before locking eyes with me. "Did you come to watch too?"

"W-watch?" I breathed out in confusion, my eyes darting back and forth between Quil and Embry. This wasn't like Quil at all and it was starting to freak me out a little.

"Yea, you know watch the _show!_" He remarked with bitterness. "It's not every day you can see a wolf get as pissed off as possible and still not fucking phase."

Embry stepped toward him with an outstretched hand, obviously trying to calm him down. "Quil, she didn't know…"

I watched nervously as Quil shrugged him off and began stomping around the yard again. Frustration radiated off of him in waves, but I couldn't detect any of the telltale shaking and blurring that would signal he was about to phase.

"You should probably leave Claire," Embry spoke evenly to me while his eyes remained focused on Quil's pacing form.

"Why would she do that? _I'm_ definitely not going anywhere so she can keep me company!" Quil called out as he paused to look at me. His normally relaxed, easygoing countenance was distorted by an angry smirk that I immediately hated.

"What the hell is going on?" I questioned with a firm tone that made Embry shift his gaze to my direction as well.

"Embry needs to go on patrol and I'm stuck here like some useless—"

"Dammit Quil!" Embry cut him off with an uncharacteristic shout of annoyance. "I know we always patrol together, but it's obviously not happening right now. Can you please get over it and calm down so I can leave already?"

Quil and I both stared at Embry in surprise as we reeled from his atypical, impassioned speech. Embry noticed our scrutiny and sighed.

"Can you please stop trying to phase while I'm gone?" He mumbled looking pointedly at Quil. "I'd rather you not accidentally kill Claire."

The heated anger that had taken hold of Quil seemed to dissipate as he ran a hand through his hair and then nodded. "Sure."

Embry looked skeptical, but seemed pleased enough with Quil's reaction. "Great. I'm sure you and Claire can think of something to do while I'm on patrol."

He looked to me and I shook my head in agreement. "Yep, we'll be fine. Right Quil?"

Quil simply grunted as he walked back to the house and slammed the door shut behind him.

_Damn I haven't seen him this angry since Collin caused me to sprain my ankle last year._

"Are you sure you want to stay with him?" Embry questioned in a soft voice that warmed my heart. He was always looking out for me now that Quil didn't know about the imprint.

"I'm good. Don't worry!"

"Okay…call one of the guys if you need anything."

I rolled my eyes and gave him a light shove toward the nearby tree line. "Geeze you're acting like Quil used to. Just go already!"

Embry chuckled before turning to jog off. I was smiling as I looked back at the house, but it faltered when I noticed Quil watching through the glass door with a brooding expression on his face.

_What's he doing there? Is he still mad about Embry patrolling without him?_

He opened the door for me and I stepped inside, still watching him closely. I followed him to the couch where we both settled down in silence.

"Why is Embry always so worried about you?" Quil's tone was unreadable and his expression remained impassive when I peeked over at him.

"He's just looking out for me. It's what all the guys do…"

There was a short pause before Quil answered. "Yea I guess."

"You used to be like that too actually," I mumbled before even considering my words. Quil stiffened for a second, but didn't turn to look at me.

"Well if that's how the rest of the guys are with you then I'm sure I was the same right?"

_If you only knew…_

I found myself nodding to verify his statement though I wanted to do something rash like shake him instead. It was suddenly suffocating to be around him while he was clearly so indifferent toward me.

"Do you want to watch TV or something?" I asked him, hoping it would it change the subject to a lighter topic. Quil shook his head 'no' and continued to stare straight ahead like I wasn't even there. He was obviously still focused on his inability to phase with no consideration for anything else.

"Look Quil," I began to speak in as calm and comforting of a voice as possible, "I know you're upset right now, but maybe you just need some more time to recover from everything that happened."

Quil didn't respond and I placed my hand gently on his arm.

"Quil?"

He suddenly jerked away from me to rub his face with both hands. "God can't you just leave me alone! Don't you see that I'm angry right now?"

I bristled at his harsh tone, unused to Quil ever addressing me this way. "I'm just trying to help!"

"Why? Why are _you_ always bothering me? I don't need your help!" Quil shot back loudly causing me to flinch. It was like he was dealing me physical blows with each severe word he spoke.

"How would you even know that? You don't remember anything about me! I could be exactly what you need right now and you wouldn't have a fucking clue!" My voice was trembling now, overwrought by pain that I desperately tried to shove away in favor of anger. I knew Quil would never have said these things if he remembered me, but it was still horrible hearing it regardless.

Quil finally turned to face me, his expression a mixture of comprehension and annoyance. "So _that_'s what this is about? That I still don't remember? Well I'm sorry I don't. I'm _really_ sorry. But that's just the hand that life dealt me and you need to get over it!"

"Get over it? Fine! You know what? That's it! I'm so fucking _over it_," I spat back bitterly, feeling tears pricking at the corners of my eyes. I wiped them away furiously with the back of my hand. "If you want to forget about our friendship just go right ahead! I don't ev-ev-even _care_ any-anymore! You're just a b-b-big, stupid Quilpickle anyway!"

I knew my words were childish, but I was so upset that I couldn't concern myself with sounding mature. It's not like Quil was acting like much of an adult anyway.

_I need to get out of here now!_

Without looking at Quil I stood up and turned on my heel in one fluid motion. I couldn't stop the tears that were falling now as I stumbled around the side of the couch with only one thought on my mind: ESCAPE.

"Claire?" I faintly heard Quil's voice from behind me as I pushed open the sliding door and rushed out into the brisk air. Sucking a mouthful of it into my lungs, I blindly ran toward the woods, tears obstructing my vision so that everything looked blurred.

_How did things end up like this? Quil hates me!_

I only made it a few feet into the dense forest before a large hand gripped my wrist and spun me around. I yelped in surprise when I collided with a muscled chest that I knew to be Quil's.

"Claire, I'm sorry. I didn't mean—"

"Leave me alone Quil!" I pushed away from his grip, attempting to distance myself from his body, but the warm fingers around my wrist only tightened.

"No. I want to apologize. Just let me okay?" He spoke in hushed, urgent tones that did strange things to my already racing heart. I looked away from his earnest brown eyes and focused on a withered stump that stood close by.

"Why? Why should I let you do anything? You pretty much told me that you don't want me around!" My words sounded choked and I was horrified to feel more tears drip down my cheeks. Quil's eyes appeared to be following their watery descent with surprising intensity.

"I was angry and upset and just fucking stupid. I didn't mean any of that Claire," He intoned while staring at me intently. I wanted to believe him more than anything.

"Then why did you say it?" I whispered brokenly.

"I don't know," he sighed, his hand tracing a path from my wrist up to my elbow. "This whole memory loss thing is messing me up and then throw in not being able to phase and I just lost it. I'm sorry Claire, really, I am."

I didn't respond, but rather stared at the ground considering how screwed up everything had become.

_It must be harder on him than I thought…I've only been thinking about how I feel._

"Claire, _please_?" Quil's soft voice drew my eyes up to his and I was startled by how close he had leaned in toward me. "I don't like the thought of you being…well…mad at me."

"Why?" I breathed.

Quil looked thoughtful for a moment as he stared upward, considering my question. "It just feels…it feels _wrong_."

_It does?_

"Oh." It was all I could manage to respond with as my mouth suddenly felt uncomfortably dry. Quil looked unsure for a moment before he nodded with the hint of a smile on his lips.

"Yea weird right?"

"Not really," I mumbled, thinking that it was in fact the least weird thing I had heard today. I knew exactly what he meant about it feeling wrong when we were upset with each other. Personal experience had taught me that fighting didn't sit well with the imprint magic.

"Claire?" His other hand was suddenly mimicking the action of the first, running up and down my arms soothingly.

"Mhmm?"

"Can I ask you something?" He spoke so quietly that I barely heard him. My breath became uneven as he stared at me with a bemused look that made his eyes narrow and his mouth quirk in concentration.

"Yea?" I whispered back, entranced by the way his hands were gliding over my arms with feather lightness.

"Were we ever…I mean did we ever…" He paused and I moved in closer, breathlessly waiting for him to continue.

"Yes?"

"Claire! Quil! I've been looking for you guys!"

_And the Bad Timing Award goes to Seth Clearwater! F My Life. _

* * *

><p><strong>AN: So what did y'all think? Liked it? Loved it? Or didn't love it so much? Either way, inquiring minds (ie- ME!) wana know! Thanks ****XOXOX :) **_  
><em>


	13. Kickstarts

**Chapter 13**

_Start to think it could be fizzling out  
>Kinda' shocked because I never really had any doubts<br>Look into your eyes, imagine life without ya  
>And the love kick starts again<em>

-Kickstarts by Example

"Claire! Quil! I've been looking for you guys!" A loud voice startled us both and freed me from the spell that Quil had put me under with his soft touch. Quil released his grip on my arms and took a step back as Seth bounded up to us.

"What're you guys doing out here?" Seth questioned looking quickly between us for an explanation.

_What the heck __**were**__ we doing just now?_

"Nothing. What do you want Clearwater?" Quil replied without missing a beat and I was grateful that I didn't have to speak up. My voice was probably hoarse and raspy from yelling which Seth would definitely pick up on.

"You weren't answering your phones!" Seth remarked in the good-natured manner that was his trademark. "Everyone's over at Sam and Emily's so I was sent to get you."

Quil glanced at me. "Claire, are you up for it?"

"Seriously?" Seth looked at him in confusion. "There's gonna be pizza. Do I need to say more?"

"Okay we're coming," I murmured, mentally wincing when I heard my gravelly voice. Seth cocked an eyebrow in my direction before looking at Quil who was shifting his weight between his feet.

"Why do you sound like an old lady who smokes a pack a day?"

_Thanks for the imagery Seth._

I cleared my throat before responding. "I don't know…allergies maybe? There's dust and other shit floating around."

"Yea we should probably head back so it doesn't get worse," Quil added.

Seth looked entirely unconvinced, but shrugged anyway. "Oookay. _Dust_ in the air…yea. Let's go then. Wouldn't want those allergies to keep acting up."

He pivoted to the right and began walking back to the house with quick, confident steps. I moved to follow after him, but Quil put a hand on my shoulder, stopping me.

"Hey, you're okay right?"

_I would be more okay if you would just freaking hold me!_

"Yep, I'm cool."

"I still feel like a jerk though."

I smiled up at him, hoping it would make him relax. "Well you can try to make up for it I suppose…"

Quil's eyebrows pushed together. "How?"

"By helping me get as much Hawaiian pizza as possible! Brady and Collin always hog it all!"

"I think I can handle that," Quil responded with a laugh. He started to walk away when I suddenly remembered that Seth had interrupted what appeared to be an important question.

"Quil? Was there something you were trying to ask me…y'know before Seth came?" My words stopped Quil immediately in his tracks and I stepped over so that I could see his face again.

_Should I not have said anything?_

Quil's grin had vanished to be replaced by an apprehensive expression that made me nervous.

"Uh well…I don't even really remember now. No big deal."

"Oh. Are you sure?" I asked hesitantly, not yet willing to give up on hearing what he had almost said. It had seemed pretty dang important a few minutes ago!

Quil eyes didn't meet my own as he nodded and started walking again. Obviously he wanted me to drop it and I grudgingly complied. It probably wouldn't do for me to get all whiny and obnoxious on him when he still was trying to get to know me. If only we hadn't been interrupted in the first place!

_Damn you Seth Clearwater!_

The offending wolf was waiting for us in the yard and I couldn't help but scowl as we approached him.

"You're driving Quil!" he called out grinning brightly. It made me want to give him a good kick to the shin. Too bad it would probably end up breaking _my_ toes.

"You could just run there…" I mumbled under my breath, not caring that wolf-hearing would pick up on it. Seth looked at me knowingly before mouthing a quick 'sorry' when Quil had passed by both of us on the way to his truck.

_You SHOULD be sorry._

Seth must have noticed that my hard gaze hadn't changed because he continued to look at me pleadingly before using his hands to sign a dramatic 'I love you.' The goofy gesture made me giggle, however I couldn't resist whacking him on the shoulder when I moved by. He deserved a little punishment after all!

"Why are you beating up on poor Seth?" Quil teased when the three of us had all piled into his truck. Seth snickered from the backseat where I had forced him to sit.

"He told me he loved me so I hit him."

Quil looked over at me seriously. "He what?"

"Oh don't lie Claire-bear, you know you love me too!" Seth quipped from the backseat and I joined him after a moment, causing Quil to shake his head. "You guys are ridiculous, you know that?"

"But you love us!" Seth repeated again before popping his head into the space between us in the front seat. Quil grinned and together we both pushed him back where he belonged. It really felt like old times again.

When we arrived at Sam and Emily's a few minutes later, I was in high spirits despite the fact that Quil and I had suffered a pretty intense fight only a short while ago. It was just so hard to stay angry at him when he apologized with those bottomless brown eyes and more importantly when he ran his hands all over my arms. Seriously, there was no use fighting that.

_But what was he going to ask me before Seth came? I need to know!_

I bent down distractedly to untie my shoes as I pondered possible endings to Quil's unfinished question:

"_Did we ever…"_

_-fight like this before?_

_-date?_

_-fall in love with each other?_

_-get it on like Donkey Kong?_

All viable options obviously. Too bad Quil was being Mr. Secretive about it and apparently didn't want to let me know what he was thinking.

"I think that shoe is as untied as it'll ever be," a deep voice rumbled from above my head. I looked up to find Quil eyeing me with open amusement that made his eyes crinkle in the corners. He thrust his large hand down to me in a familiar gesture and I grabbed it instinctively.

"I haven't forgotten about our mission to get you the pizza you want," Quil remarked as he tugged me gently to my feet.

"Oh crap! I forgot about the pizza!" I shrieked, gripping Quil's hand even tighter. "C'mon, let's get in there before it all gets eaten!"

I pulled Quil along behind me as I rushed toward the kitchen, not stopping until I could survey the mess of open pizza boxes all over the table. The rest of the guys were crowded around, some sitting, others standing as they inhaled their food and appeared to be oblivious to our entrance. That lasted all of 5 seconds.

"Took you guys long enough to get here!" Collin chirped, winking at me suggestively as he eyed the space between Quil and me with interest.

I realized suddenly that I was still holding onto Quil's hand and I quickly broke the contact, hoping he hadn't noticed how long I had dragged it out. To my relief, he didn't seem to mind as he took a step toward the table to scope out what was left to eat.

"Bad news Claire…" He turned to look back at me apologetically and I frowned, knowing he meant that all of my coveted Hawaiian pizza had been devoured.

"Seriously?"

"...you won't get to beat up Collin and Brady," he finished before holding up a box containing a few slices.

_SUCCESS!_

I couldn't stop the little excited squeal that left my mouth as I reached for the box only to find it out of my reach.

"Quil c'mon!"

Quil teased me with it for a few moments, making me jump up to reach before he set it my hands with an impish grin.

_Why is it so quiet in here all of a sudden?_

Forcing my eyes away from Quil's perfect face, I noticed that practically all the guys were watching us with pleased expressions. Collin and Brady's mischievous grins made me nervous though.

"So Quil?" Collin called out causing me to immediately tense up in anticipation. "What are your thoughts on _Quicksand_?"

_No!_

Quil gave him a 'what the fuck' stare. "Quicksand? What does that have to do with anything?"

"Maybe you should ask Claire…I bet she knows."

_I AM GOING TO KILL HIM._

Quil glanced over at me, waiting for some kind of explanation while I tried to look as confused as he was.

"You're not making any sense Collin," I responded throwing a glare in his direction. "Why don't you go eat a _Pop-tart_ or something?"

At the mention of his code name, Collin's face lit up excitedly. "Are you sure you don't want a Pop-tart too Claire? They're pretty _tasty_ if ya know what I mean."

_This needs to stop __**now**__._

"You know I used to like Pop-tarts until I discovered that they're just stupid, untrustworthy assholes," I muttered between gritted teeth.

I could feel Quil's eyes on me and I turned to find him looking utterly lost. I tried to cover up my slip. "Like all those hidden calories and preservatives…I felt so _betrayed_ when I found out."

I gave Collin a pointed look and he plastered an innocent, confused expression onto his face.

"You should probably switch to Toaster Strudels then, I hear they're much better!" Brady quipped and he and Collin burst into a round of girlish giggles.

_Assholes._

"Am I the only one not understanding any of this?" Quil grumbled, looking annoyed.

"I don't think any of us understand those crazies, bro," Paul commented from his spot at the table, resulting in Jared seconding his statement. Seth remained silent, but I could tell he was trying not to laugh. He knew good and well about this Operation Quicksand ridiculousness.

"Want a piece?" I offered up the box of pizza to Quil hoping to change the subject. Luckily Quil's wolf-sized appetite won out over his curiosity and we were both chowing down on ham and pineapple covered slices in no time.

Eventually the pack began filing out of the kitchen to go lounge in the living room and watch some basketball game that I cared nothing about, leaving Quil and I alone with Emily. I could see her pretending to wash dishes with rapt attention while secretly watching the two of us out of the corner of her eye. There was no privacy in this family I tell you.

"Has Claire been helping you remember things at all Quil?" Emily finally gave in to the temptation to ask what was I'm sure a long-coming question. I cringed, recalling how Quil had lashed out at me only a few hours ago, accusing me of being obsessed with him gaining his memory back.

"Well, I can't say I remember much of anything, but Claire's been keeping me distracted at least."

"Distracted?"

Quil grinned over at me. "She forces me to go to the beach and stuff. It's rough, but I guess I can handle it."

"It was fun and you know it," I retorted, causing him to chuckle. Emily was staring at us with such smugness now that it made me uncomfortable. The door to the kitchen opened abruptly a few seconds later as Sam and Embry strolled in wearing their customary cut-offs.

Embry came to stand next to Quil. "Finally chilled out now?"

"I wasn't _that_ bad was I?"

Embry raised an eyebrow before he looked at me for confirmation. "I think Claire and I can both say with certainty that you were throwin a damn hissy fit."

I giggled watching Quil squirm in his seat sheepishly. "I already apologized to Claire, don't worry."

My smile faded when I thought back to our intense encounter in the woods, but tried to keep my cool when I noticed Embry's watchful eyes.

"Yea, no harm done," I mumbled after getting up to wash my plate off in the sink. Sam took my spot at the table and proceeded to tell Quil that he had spoken to Carlisle recently about the phasing issue to which Carlisle had again recommended therapy.

"That sounds stupid," Quil muttered when Sam mentioned meeting with a therapist in Port Angeles who specialized in helping individuals with different forms of amnesia.

Sam let out a heavy sigh. "I agree, but Carlisle said that gaining your memory back could be the key to helping you phase again. I don't know about you, but I think it's worth a shot if you still haven't been able to make it happen."

There was a brief pause where my thoughts ran wild and my hands continued to busy themselves rinsing off my already spotless dish. Could some professional really help Quil regain his awareness of the imprint? It didn't seem very likely to me.

"But how is this person supposed to help me if they don't know that I'm a wolf? Like how do I explain any of this if I can't share _that_?" Quil's skeptical voice echoed my unvoiced questions.

"Carlisle seems to think that all you need is the techniques this therapist uses and that should be enough. He's already made up some story about you getting in a car accident, so you would just need to go along with that," Sam replied not sounding completely sure of the idea himself.

"What is Carlisle up to anyway?" Emily's question alerted me to the fact that neither Carlisle nor Jacob was anywhere to be seen. I felt a twinge of guilt for not noticing that Jake was missing. Apparently I was too wrapped up in being with Quil.

"Jake is actually taking him to the airport today and he's heading back to Scotland to be with the rest of the Cullens."

At the mention of Scotland, I remembered that Renesmee Cullen attended the University of Edinburgh and that's why all of the clan was hanging out over there in the first place. I pondered the amusing fact that they ended up in a country famous for a mythical creature also known affectionately as 'Nessie.'

_Oh the irony._

"So I'm supposed to go to this therapist who is probably a weird old hippie lady and wait for her to hypnotize me or something?" Quil blurted out randomly causing me to burst out laughing. I could totally picture a freaky woman with a bunch of cats swinging a watch in front of his face.

"If that's the case, can I please come to these sessions too?" I remarked, leaning my weight up against the kitchen counter so that I would have a better vantage point to see Quil.

"That's probably not a good idea Claire," was Sam's serious reply. He never was much for joking anyway. "Here's the address and stuff," he continued, handing Quil a small piece of paper. "You can start going next week."

"How exciting," Quil responded flatly.

_He looks about as a thrilled as a wolf wearing vampire-patterned pajamas. _

"Geeze don't laugh Claire…"

I looked up at Quil innocently, trying to hide the grin that had made its way onto my face. My mental image was funny though!

"I wasn't!" I promised even though I knew Quil wasn't really serious anyway. My cellphone took this opportunity to buzz annoyingly loud and Embry tossed it at me from the table. Irina's text message made me grimace.

_Wana go uoutfit shopping for the party tomorrow? And have you asked one of your sexy man friends to drive us yet? I want me some Brady!_

"Hoebag, pleease."

Emily inhaled a sharp breath, looking a little scandalized and I realized that I had actually voiced that snarky thought out loud. Oops.

"Just kidding?"

Embry and Quil started snickering as Emily shook her head disapprovingly in typical mom-style and followed Sam out of the kitchen.

"So who's the hoebag?" Quil asked after they were gone. I shrugged, hoping to avoid the topic of the upcoming house party for as long as possible.

"Just a friend of mine. She has the hots for Brady of all people. I mean really? A whole pack of guys and she picks _Brady?_"

"Hey! I resent that!" Brady shouted as he ran into the kitchen, followed closely by Collin and Seth. This was probably not a good thing.

"Well Claire does have a point…" Seth's cheerful voice carried over from behind the refrigerator door where he was currently rummaging. Brady looked mildly offended for a moment, but then shifted his attention to me instead.

"So who would _you_ pick Claire?"

_Shit._

I guffawed a little too loudly to be casual resulting in smirks being thrown in my direction. "That's not even—"

"Nope you clearly must have _someone_ in mind with the way you went on about there being 'a whole pack of sexy wolves' and I'm the least attractive one."

"Okay, the word sexy was _not _included in my sentence!" I retorted, trying not to look anywhere near Quil who hadn't said a word yet. Collin seemed to notice my shifty eyes and walked over to bump me with his elbow.

"Yea Claire, tell us who the sexiest wolf is. We're all dying to know."

"I've seen all of you be gross and immature for years! Sexy is not the right word, believe me."

"_Please_. There is no way to resist all the shirtless action that happens around here on a daily basis," Brady remarked coming to stand on the other side of me. Why were they pushing this? I could not catch a break apparently. Looking over at the table, I raised my eyebrows at Embry, hoping for some help.

_I can't blurt out that I think Quil is hot. Things will be awkward as fuck._

Embry seemed to catch the hint thankfully. "C'mon guys, lay off already."

Brady and Collin protested a few times, but Embry gave them a harsh glare that sent them running off into the next room, albeit still snickering like bastards.

"Embry, you're officially my favorite wolf of the day," I sighed coming over to pat him on his head. He laughed, but then stopped abruptly.

_Weird._

Following his gaze, I stiffened when I noticed Quil staring at us, his eyes clouded with a mixture of suspicion and something else I couldn't really identify.

"So are you guys like together or something?" He muttered in a low, quiet voice.

_WELL FUCK. _

I let out a strange sound that was half-laugh, half-squeak and followed it with some random sputtering. Not very effective in conveying my point obviously.

"Why do you care?" Embry responded suddenly and I jerked around so fast to look at him that I think I suffered some whiplash. What the hell was he trying to pull? The last thing I wanted was for Quil to think that I was _unavailable_!

Quil looked taken aback by Embry's question, but then just shrugged. "No reason. I'm just curious."

_Please be jealous. Please be jealous. _

Embry smirked at him crookedly. "Sure."

Quil's eyes met mine momentarily and I tried to decipher the emotion present in them. He seemed confused more than anything. I decided I should probably intervene before he got some crazy idea that I was dating Embry stuck in his mind.

"This is so ridiculous!" I blurted out a little too enthusiastically. "Me and _Embry_?" I gave a weird, throaty laugh. "Seriously that would never happen, right Em?"

Embry didn't say anything, simply shrugging noncommittally. I wanted to choke him.

"Maybe we should go like watch the baseball game?" I suggested when Quil had sat there staring at the table like it had insulted him for too long.

"It's basketball actually," Seth piped up from across the room. I had forgotten he was still in here, apparently too set on trying to prove to Quil that I was in fact single.

"Whatever same thing. Wanna watch guys?""

Embry yawned and stood up. I froze in surprise when he mussed my hair affectionately with his hand and then threw me a wink that only I could see. "Sure Claire-bear."

I looked back at Quil, who was watching me with barely concealed interest. He stood up as well, somehow managing to brush his arm up against mine at the same time. It felt pretty freakin amazing.

"You're hard to figure out, you know that?" He mumbled before moving to follow Seth and Embry out of the kitchen.

"Keep trying?" I breathed hopefully, looking at the back of his head. He turned to give me the ghost of a smile.

"Yea, I'm workin on it."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: My life has pretty much sucked ass this past week hence this chapter coming out later than I anticipated. Please cheer me up with reviews? Yes I am shameless but ILOVEYOUGUYS. Like you don't even know. Giant supernatural wolf-sized thanks to each and everyone who reads/reviews this story. You are fab.  
><strong>


	14. Tomorrow Comes Today

**Chapter 14**

_And I have the strength to overcome  
>I have the will to carry on<br>I'm not scared to face this world on my own  
>On my own<br>Alone I face the sun  
>The burning has begun<br>A light is shining through  
>And it brings me back to you<em>

-Tomorrow Comes Today by 12 Stones

"Claire does this make me look fat?"

I groaned, burying my face into a pillow as I lay sprawled across my bed. Irina stood before me in a skimpy dress that left little to the imagination as it hugged her newly grown curves. Honestly my body kind of paled in comparison to all of that C-cup voluptuousness she had going on, but I could deal.

"I'm not answering that question. You know you don't look fat," I mumbled into the pillow hoping she would just settle on a damn outfit already. It was the Friday of Shayla's much anticipated 'parents are away, it's time to play' party and I was going somewhat against my will.

"Whatever Claire. I could be wearing a paper bag and you would say it looks fine."

I couldn't help but laugh at that image. "A bag would probably cover more of your ass actually."

Irina smacked me with another pillow prompting me to sit up on the bed just in case I needed to launch a retaliatory strike. Fortunately she had moved on to burning her hair with a straightening iron despite the fact that there were no waves or kinks anywhere to be seen.

"So are you really just gonna wear _that_?" Irina questioned while flicking her eyes over at me in obvious distaste. I shrugged glancing down at my jeans and top that I thought would be dressy enough for a party. Obviously Irina did not approve.

"I mean, you could totally wear one of my other dresses! You would look so hot in that blue one!"

I snorted before grabbing a brush that I pulled through my long, wavy hair. "We're going to a house party not some fancy club. I think casual is perfectly acceptable."

"Well true. You do look good Claire, it's just I thought you wanted to impress Nathan and—"

"Uh no. I'm not even interested in him, I told you that!" I protested, immediately thinking how no other guy could even compare to my favorite wolf, Quil. "Now stop worrying about my outfit and just be glad I convinced Riley to drive us, okay?"

Irina's sigh was half-hearted, but she nodded anyway, letting the matter drop. As I watched her touch up her make-up in my full-length mirror, I felt my phone buzzing in the pocket of my jeans and I pulled it out hastily.

_ZOMG._

My fingers clenched around the device in anticipation when I noticed that it was QUIL FREAKIN ATEARA that was currently calling me! Not that this would usually be a nerve-wracking occurrence, but it was the very first time he had ever called me since the accident. This was kind of a big deal.

"Hello?" I spoke breathlessly into the phone, waiting to hear Quil's velvety baritone answer back.

"Hey Claire, this is Quil. What's up?"

_YOU ARE CALLING ME! That's what's up!_

I tried to take on a casual, easy-going tone that wouldn't relay my excitement. "Not much. You?"

"Just hanging with Jake and Embry, so obviously nothing too exciting going on," He answered back with a soft chuckle. I could imagine exactly how his eyes would light up in mirth, enjoying the jibe against his buddies.

"Yea, sounds thrilling," I quipped, standing to walk down the hallway. I could never keep still when I was on the phone with someone.

"So, since we're just being bored over here, I—_we_ were wondering if you want to come chill with us. Embry has some movie he wants to watch that will probably be terrible, but I'm sure you would enjoy making fun of it."

I perked up at the invite, but then instantly deflated upon remembering that I had already agreed to go to the party with Irina. She would literally kill me if I tried to back out of it now.

"As great as that sounds," I began in a defeated voice, slumping against the wall of the hallway, "I already have plans with a friend of mine."

"Darn. The guys will be so bummed. Plus you could have heard all about my exciting adventures with memory therapy…oh well your loss!" Quil's tone was playful, but I almost felt like crying. He was treating me like a real friend and I couldn't even go hangout with him.

_Why is life always kicking me in the balls? Well, my metaphorical ones…_

"Oh yea your therapy started this week didn't it? It went okay then?" I muttered, realizing that I hadn't seen Quil since he had gone to his therapy session on Wednesday. That was two whole days apart!

"Yea it was fine. The therapist is cool actually, not the weird crazy person that I pictured." He punctuated the statement with a short laugh that made me miss him even more.

"Well that's no fun! You'll have to tell me about it later then..." I trailed off as Irina popped her head out my bedroom door, eyeing me skeptically. "I should probably go though."

Quil exhaled loudly. "Alright. Have fun tonight. I'll talk to you later Claire."

"Yea later Quil. Goodnight." I ended the call with a push of a button and walked back to my bedroom where Irina was surely waiting for me. A half hour later and she was primped up to her satisfaction and I was feeling fairly comfortable with my loose hair and only a bit of mascara and lip-gloss. I didn't do makeup for the most part, but this hadn't done much to change my appearance and Irina had wanted me to wear it "so, so, so much!"

_Apparently I'm a pushover now?_

Riley grudgingly tore herself away from her laptop to drive us the few miles away to Shayla's house which looked hoppin from the amount of cars parked out front. It only took a few seconds before Irina was climbing out of the car with a tight grip on my arm that forced me to follow her onto the lawn.

"Have fun guys! I'll be back to get you later!" Riley called through the rolled down passenger window and then she was speeding off, leaving us to fend for ourselves. She was actually in favor of me attending the party simply because she thought it was an act of independence from Quil and a normal teenage experience. Honestly I wasn't sure how I felt about any of this.

"C'mon Claire! Let's go inside!" Irina's voice was bubbling over with excitement and I tried to let some of her emotion rub off onto me. There was no point in moping around worrying about Quil when he was having a fun time without me. I could have fun without him too!

_Just relax and be sociable. You're not a hermit._

Our entrance into the house was not as dramatic as Irina had predicted when we were driving over. The music was thumping so loudly that it was impossible to hear the door open and the living room was too crowded for us to remotely stand out. I recognized many familiar faces from school as they mingled with each other, holding red cups that most definitely didn't contain an innocent beverage.

"Irina! That dress is H-O-T-T!"

_Oh god I've been wrong about the spelling of 'hot' for so many years!_

A mini-skirt clad girl stumbled over toward us, obviously drunk despite the fact that it was still pretty early in the night. I realized it was the host of the party, Shayla with about a pound of makeup covering her face and her hair styled into a curly mass on top of her head.

_Over the top much?_

"Your dress looks great too," Irina answered back politely. Shayla was normally a pretty girl, but her current state was best classified as 'hot mess' more than anything.

"And shit! _Claire Young_ actually made it to a party?" Shayla's wide eyes were now glued to me as she shouted her incredulous statement loud enough for probably the entire state of Washington to hear. "The hot man gang finally decided to let you go out for a change? I thought they babysat you every night or something."

I stiffened at her mention of the pack, but didn't let myself get defensive when I knew she was obviously speaking through an intoxicated haze.

"Claire just wants to have some fun like everyone else. It's not her fault that she's popular with a bunch of guys…don't be _jealous_ now Shayla," Irina jumped in to defend me before I could respond and I couldn't help but smirk. Shayla looked taken aback for a moment before she broke into a round of giggles that seemed completely out of place to me.

"You guys are like way funny. I'm so glad you came!" She exclaimed before twirling around unsteadily to ambush another unsuspecting person.

"Wow. Some people should probably not be allowed to drink."

I laughed at Irina's comment as I watched Shayla knock over a potted plant. "Agreed."

We meandered through the crowd of our peers, many of whom were just as drunk as Shayla appeared to be, until we reached the kitchen where it was much less crowded. I stood against the wall as Irina filled a cup with some beer from a keg that had been set up on the counter.

"Want anything Claire?" She called over to me, but I signaled that I wasn't interested with a shake of my head. Getting drunk was not a priority of mine tonight.

"Are you sure you don't want a drink?" A distinctly masculine voice was suddenly breathing warm into my ear. I turned my head to regard the person and was surprised to find the face of Nathan, the guy from my calculus class, close to mine.

"Uh nope. I'm good thanks," I responded while trying to edge away from the unfamiliar body that had sidled up next to me. From across the room I could see Irina watching us with a giant grin, obviously pleased that I was interacting with a boy that supposedly had the hots for me.

"That's cool. I don't drink much either really." Nathan's slightly slurred words and the cup in his hand belied his statement completely causing me to chuckle.

"Whatever you say pal."

"Pal?" Nathan questioned grinning at me in what I'm sure was meant to be a charming way. "I thought we were closer than _that_!"

I didn't have a response to that so I shrugged and glared over at Irina hoping she would come join the conversation. All I received from her however was an enthusiastic thumbs up before she latched onto the arm of a guy and waltzed out of the kitchen.

_Awesome._

"Hey, you're really nice you know that?"

"Sure. Thanks. So I should probably see where Irina went and—"

"She's with my friend Wes so she's totally fine," Nathan assured me confidently. "Besides, I want to hangout with _you_."

He looked at me with a hopeful glint in his eye, reminding me of how he had once asked to be my partner for a Calc project with practically the same expression. My resolve to ignore him faltered as I thought of how nice he always was in class. I couldn't just blow him off so quickly could I?

"Well okay…the kitchen's a fun place to chill right?"

"Definitely!"

My agreement to stay and chat resulted in Nathan excitedly talking to me about school, his job, college plans, and everything else he could think of. It was strange because I had always thought of Nathan as more of the silent, shy type but here he was blabbing away at me. Alcohol really did cause people to open up I guess.

"So you never showed up for my 18th birthday thing a few weeks ago…what was that about?" Nathan questioned me teasingly after we had been talking for a while now. I had lost track of time, but it seemed the keg was empty because no one was really coming into the kitchen for a refill anymore.

"Sorry, I've had a lot of stuff going on recently and I didn't even know it was your—" I began to respond, but stopped immediately when Nathan reached over to grab my hand.

"It's fine Claire. I was joking." Nathan ran his fingers against my palm and I shuddered reflexively. "I didn't have a real party. We all just hungout at my house. Wish you could have been there though."

"Oh okay," I whispered back, all but frozen now in shock at the unexpected physical contact. When he tried to intertwine our fingers however, I snapped back to consciousness and quickly pulled my hand away until it was free at my side.

"So uh my 18th birthday is coming up really soon too," I muttered trying to distract him. "I've sort of forgotten about it actually…" I suddenly realized that I had recently neglected the upcoming milestone in favor of other pressing matters.

_Too much Quil drama in my life geeze._

Nathan perked up at my statement, leaning in closer despite the fact that we were the only ones in the kitchen and didn't need to increase the proximity to hear one another. "Awesome we'll both be like real adults then. We'll have to hangout and celebrate!"

_No thanks._

I shrugged ambiguously not wanting to say no outright. "Hmm maybe. I probably won't be doing anything for my birthday though."

Nathan didn't seem fazed by my words and leaned in even closer to tuck a strand of my hair behind my ear. "It doesn't need to be a party or anything…it could be just me and you."

I made to move away from him and his penetrating gaze, but a warm hand was suddenly on my upper arm prompting me gently to stay in place. My phone began buzzing lightly in my pocket and I wondered if perhaps fate was trying to pull me away from this mess as well. However, I was too distracted by Nathan's face moving slowly toward me to even attempt to answer it.

"Nathan I don't—"

I never got the chance to finish my sentence because my lips were abruptly silenced by a kiss.

_OH GOD HE'S KISSING ME!_

I stood motionless as Nathan gently moved his lips against mine, trying unsuccessfully to elicit a reaction out of me. I didn't react, only registering my phone buzzing again angrily in my pocket rather than the pressure on my mouth. All I could think about was the fact that it felt utterly and completely _wrong_ to kiss someone other than Quil.

"Stop!" I managed to grunt out as I tore my lips away from his, breathing heavily. Nathan looked confused by my reaction and I noticed his hands flex against my arms where they were still gripping tightly.

"Claire I didn't mean—"

"Get off of her!" Suddenly Nathan and I were being separated by a large body that I hadn't even noticed enter the room. I gasped when I saw that it was none other than _Quil_ standing in between us, shaking with poorly concealed fury.

_Well fuck a duck!_

"Hey man, I wasn't doing anything!" Nathan choked out as Quil backed him up against the wall. I was so flabbergasted that I simply watched the scene unfold for a few terrifying moments.

"Bullshit," Quil growled in a low voice, towering over Nathan's much shorter form. "She told you to stop and you weren't letting go."

Quil's hands clenched as if he was about to deck Nathan in the face and I instinctively lunged forward to grab onto his muscled arm. Nathan didn't deserve to be punished for something he hadn't even really done.

"Quil stop!"

Immediately Quil froze, the tension in his body seeming to ease away as he turned to look down at me. The anger that had previously contorted his face was quickly replaced by shock, like he was just now registering his actions.

"Quil?" I whispered nervously while tightening my hold on his arm. He gave his head a brief shake reminiscent of dog attempting to clear its ears of water and took a few measured steps away from Nathan.

"Claire, Quil let's go," a voice commanded from behind us and I turned to see Jacob Black standing in the doorway of the kitchen looking wary of the tense atmosphere. Quil gave him a curt nod before glaring once at Nathan and then gently taking my hand to pull me out of the room.

"Wait, I should say something to Nathan before we go," I protested weakly from in between Jake and Quil as we pushed through the crowded living room. Jake pinned me with a serious stare and a barely imperceptible shake of the head that clearly meant 'it can wait.'

_What the hell happened in there? _

The three of us were out of the house and standing on the lawn in a matter of seconds and I wrenched my hand away from Quil's as my thoughts finally started to organize themselves.

"Why are you guys here?" I demanded, watching Quil's face closely.

"Riley texted Quil asking if he could pick you up instead," Jake answered before Quil could speak. "We tried calling you when we got here, but you didn't answer so we just went inside."

I nodded my understanding, but continued to wait for Quil to say something. He had practically attacked Nathan back there and hadn't said a word about it!

"Let's just go home alright?" Jacob muttered looking back and forth between Quil and me.

"Well I have to go get Irina first…" My words were interrupted by my phone going off and I glanced down at it. As if she had been listening to our conversation, Irina's text message instructed me to leave without her since her new buddy Wes wanted to take her home.

"Who's texting you?" Quil asked.

"Irina. She wants to stay and let some guy take her home, which is probably not a good idea. I should go grab her." I started walking toward the front door, but Jacob stepped in front of me cutting off my path.

"Why don't you let Quil take you home first and I'll make sure this guy actually gets her back. I wouldn't want you to miss your curfew or anything."

_Riley isn't __**that**__ strict._

I regarded him for a moment, taking in the stern expression on his face and realizing that now was probably not the best time to argue about this. It wouldn't do for another confrontation to take place between two wolves and some other drunken party-goer because I wanted to go back in there.

"Fine," I sighed resignedly. "You better watch her though."

Jake nodded with the hint of a smile, signaling something with his eyes to Quil who was standing there motionless. I could see Quil's truck parked down the street so I began walking toward it, knowing he would quickly fall in step beside me.

_This is so not how I pictured the night going._

"You weren't drinking were you?" Quil questioned hesitantly as we hopped into our respective seats in the cab of his truck. I mumbled a quiet 'no' and forced my eyes forward so that I wouldn't be tempted to stare at him. The engine rumbled to life, effectively signaling the end of my first house-party experience. It had been a mindfuck that's for sure.

"Hey Claire?" Quil spoke softly over the truck's steady hum.

"Yea?"

I watched Quil's hands grip the steering wheel tensely and I couldn't help that my eyes drifted to his face. He looked heartbreakingly guilty and confused. "I'm sorry about what happened back there. I shouldn't have…reacted like that. I don't even…"

He sighed, clearly frustrated. "It's just that I thought that guy was _hurting_ you and I freaked out. It was like I didn't even think about what I was doing at all."

"It's okay. I know you were just looking out for me," I replied back, hoping to alleviate some of his worry. Internally though, my mind was running a thousand miles per minute trying to dissect what Quil's reaction meant and if it indicated that he was feeling the imprint at all.

"No it was stupid Claire. I mean, if you wanted to kiss that guy then that's what you—"

"I _didn't_ want him to kiss me!" I all but shouted over his words. Quil's eyes shifted to meet my own, a question evident in them. "You heard me tell him to stop, right?"

Quil's nod was immediate and I continued speaking albeit a little embarrassedly. Talking to the person I loved about kissing some other guy was not high on my list of fun activities. "But he wasn't y'know really _forcing_ me or anything. He's not a bad guy, I swear. I just don't like him…like _that_."

I felt a warm blush slowly creep up my neck and I sank down further into the seat, hoping it would go unnoticed in the darkness.

"Still, I shouldn't be telling you what to do anyway. I'm your friend, not your babysitter," Quil said with a short, self-deprecating laugh. "You're a _teenager_ and I'm...well...regardless, you should be going out and having fun, right?"

His cryptic statement unnerved me and I drew in a deep breath as I noticed us pulling up in front of my house. Quil quickly cut the engine off before shifting in his seat to look at me.

"I know this is going to sound weird, but I'm just confused I guess…" His deep voice reverberated throughout the small space, prompting me to shiver. "Are you with Embry? Or that guy? Or _anyone_?"

I squirmed uncomfortably in the seat. "You mean like _dating_ them?" Quil nodded. "Then no, I'm-I'm not."

_Does being soulmates with you count as dating?  
><em>

"Okay so you're not dating _anyone_," he repeated back to me while running a hand through his hair. "I mean I know I lost my memory and stuff, so everything is weird to me now."

"What do you mean?"

Quil's eyes pinned me in place. "Like I'm hanging out with the guys and I'm wondering, what the hell have I been doing all these years? I wasn't dating anyone recently, and apparently haven't been for the past decade or so…like I look through my cellphone contacts and it's the pack, their wives, my immediate family, and _you_. It's just weird to me that I wasn't bored living like this."

Quil's breath left in a long exhale while I sat immobile with a heart that was racing out of control. He had realized that something was amiss with his lifestyle and I knew I could give him the answer he sought. This would be the perfect opportunity to jump in with a quick "actually I'm your imprint so _that's_ why you've been living like a monk!" statement.

_Do it Claire! Just tell him!_

I hesitated long enough however, for Quil to launch into another contemplative speech. "I mean was I happy that way Claire? We were obviously close…there are reminders of you practically all over the place! Like in my room—I kid you not—there are photos of my mom and _you_. You're number one in my speed-dial, I have a drawer of stuff in my dresser that apparently is your clothing according to Embry, and you had that swimsuit in my closet too. I just don't…I don't get it Claire."

_Oh. My. Lord. I am NOT ready for this right now!_

Quil must have noticed my clearly panicked expression because his eyes roamed over my face with concern. "Sorry. I didn't mean to freak out on you like that. It's just been really strange for me since the accident."

_Tell him about the imprint!_

I swallowed loudly, trying to work up the courage to say what I knew would completely change how he viewed me. "Quil, we were _really_ close. That's why you have all of that stuff…it's because…because you and I are…"

_If I tell him this, he'll feel forced into it._

Quil watched me expectantly and I tried to not hyperventilate. "Well we're best friends."

_Damn it. Not the correct answer._

"Best friends?" Quil questioned quizzically.

I nodded, trying to convince myself as well. "Yep. That's why we were so close. It makes sense right?"

"Sure. Best friends." Quil repeated in a strange voice. The air felt thick around us, making each of my breaths feel inadequate. I wanted to tell Quil about the imprint so badly, but I knew it would be an entirely selfish move. Quil had just confessed moments ago that he felt like he was practically wasting his life and I knew deep down that the reason he hadn't lived normally was because of _me_. Instead of dating girls his age, Quil had spent his time watching after me, playing games I wanted to play, and taking me to the beach every sunny weekend. I had gotten everything and Quil had gotten screwed. It was as clear to me now as if he had told me himself.

_I've been so selfish. _

"Claire, are you crying?"

I shook myself out my reverie, realizing that there were indeed tears sliding down my cheeks. "I'm just sad for _you._" I whispered back to him.

"Don't feel bad. It's not your fault I can't remember," Quil assured me quietly. "Really I'm fine. C'mon don't cry."

The feeling of guilt that gripped my heart was relentless though and I only shook my head against his comforting words. A devastating idea was taking hold of my mind. It was a realization that maybe what was best for Quil wasn't having me as imprint, but rather the freedom to live his life how he wanted. He had sacrificed everything for me and now would I be strong enough to do the same for him?

_Maybe he can fall in love with me anyway...  
><em>

"Quil?" I rasped out after he had encouraged me to stop crying again. "Can I-I hug you?"

The need to physically comfort him was so strong that I didn't care how awkward my question was. Quil appeared momentarily surprised before giving a light cough.

"Okay."

I wasted no time sliding across the bench seat until I was face to face with Quil's rugged features. I hesitated for a second and then slowly wrapped my arms around his waist, burrowing my face into his solid shoulder.

_Can't he feel how right this is?_

I expected Quil to stay stiff and unmoving, but suddenly he seemed to melt into the embrace and his arms were around me in a familiar hold. My body curled into his larger one, taking up a position that I had sorely missed out on since the accident.

_I have to do what's best for Quil._

As I basked in the warmth of his arms, I tried to focus on what I could do for him without giving away that I was his Imprint. Maybe comfort and friendship would have to suffice until he decided what he wanted.

_Oooh_.

A soft sigh of contentment left my lips of its own accord when Quil's head nuzzled gently against my hair.

_Yes, I could do this. I could stay like this for as long as he needed. _

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Hi guys. This chapter feels a bit long to me...brevity has never been my strong point unfortunately ;) Hope you still managed to get through all of it enjoyably though! Let me know what you thought about it if you don't mind. Thanks as always to everyone who read and reviewed last chapter...they really motivate me to try and crank this stuff out when I feel lazy haha. And Happy St. Patty's days in advance! Anyone else Irish like me and gonna represent on Saturday? Yeea buddy. **_  
><em>


	15. Heart Skipped a Beat

**Chapter 15 **

_Heart skipped a beat  
>And when I caught it you were out of reach<br>But I'm sure, I'm sure  
>You've heard it before<em>

-Heart Skipped a Beat by the xx

Have you ever made a decision that you thought was right and then realized that all it did was fuck yourself over more? Yea. That's how things were going for me right now.

_It's your own damn fault Claire-stupid-scaredy-bear._

Instead of telling Quil that I was his imprint, his destined lover, I told him a watered down version of the truth which was that we're best friends. Don't get me wrong, we totally were best friends since before I can even remember, but last time I checked best friends don't want to kiss the other person's face off. And I definitely want to kiss Quil. A whole freaking lot.

_Would it be sexual assault if I just pounced on him one day? Probably._

Maybe if I hadn't been so emotional in the car I could have thought up a way to convince him that it was a normal part of our relationship for me to stick my tongue down his throat. But no, I just had to put myself further into the friend zone and make him write me off romantically more than he already did.

"Claire! Claire! Play with us pleeease!"

I released a startled squeak as two small bodies launched themselves onto my lap with no small amount of force. The intruders barely gave me time to respond before they started pulling on my arms, attempting to yank me off of the couch to join them in whatever crazy game they had planned.

"Okay okay. I'll play!" I shouted in protest. "Just don't pull my arms out of their sockets geeze!"

"Yay! Come outside with us!" Grayson—Sam and Emily's young son—yelled enthusiastically and I couldn't help but smile. His voice was so damn cute and high-pitched.

"Yea Claire! We're gonna play freeze tag!" Grayson's usual partner in crime Audrey Lahote, grinned at me revealing a prominent gap where her front tooth was missing. These kids totally knew how to reel me in with their adorableness.

"Well let's get going then! Last one outside has to be tagger!"

The kids squealed as I launched myself up to a standing position and pretended to sprint toward the door after them. They were through the entrance with the screen banging behind them before I even made it across the room.

"Claire? Are you going out there too?" Emily called from the kitchen and I yelled back in the affirmative. I had been lounging around her living room watching old game show reruns for the past 2 hours and figured it was probably time to use some muscles other than those involved in blinking and yawning.

_Plus the kids just looove me. _

"Run Audrey!" Grayson's frantic cry sounded out the moment I stepped onto the porch. "She'll catch us!"

I watched them take off across the grass for a few seconds before I gave chase. "Oh you better run!"

For being so small, the little munchkins were surprisingly fast and I had to force my stiff legs forward to catch up with them, the muscles tight from sitting so long. The grass felt soft and cool beneath my bare feet as I feinted toward Audrey and then went for Grayson instead.

"Gotcha buddy!"

I grabbed my young cousin around the waist and spun him around once before depositing him on the grass in a giggling heap. Audrey was shrieking gleefully from a few feet away, obviously delighted that she had avoided capture.

_Not for long though! _

I dashed toward her, but she skirted under my outstretched arm screaming and then tapped Grayson who was still frozen in place.

"Let's get Claire!" Grayson shouted suddenly, his face lighting up with a mischievous grin I knew all too well.

_Uh-oh…_

I barely had time to react before two pint-sized bodies were attached to my legs trying to climb me like a freakin tree! Their combined weight ultimately sent me stumbling onto the ground where I protested loudly against a particularly ruthless tickle-assault.

"Stop, stop! Please…ahhhh no!" My cries went unheeded and were met only with more giggling as they pinned me to the grass. It's like personal space doesn't even exist in this family.

"Uncle Jake!" Grayson's excited squeal was suddenly ringing out over my head and I attempted unsuccessfully to turn toward the woods where the his eyes were glued. I gave Audrey a light shove, hoping she would get the hint and roll off of me, but she didn't seem to notice the pressure of my hand at all.

"Oh it's Uncle Em and Quil too!" she cried happily resulting in an immediate spike in my heart rate.

_Quil!_

Summoning up my strength, I finally pushed the attackers off of my chest so that I could roll over onto my stomach and confirm the presence of a certain wolf. And hotdamn, did I confirm that shit. Jake, Quil, and Embry were emerging from the tree line laughing and shoving each other in all their shirtless, muscled glory. Have I mentioned that my life sometimes resembles a Native American Ambercrombie and Fitch photo shoot? _Thank you_ wolf-genes!

In a brief moment of wonderful delusion I imagined that things were right in the world and that Quil was returning from patrolling with the guys, memory fully intact. It took a few seconds of shameless ogling before my brain caught up to my hormones and began to wonder what exactly they were doing that resulted in the current shirtlessness. Not that I was complaining or anything…

"Hey kiddos!" Jake yelled, disrupting my train of thought. "Is that _Claire_ you're holding captive?"

His comments resulted in more giggling and I let out a small indignant huff that turned into a sigh when Quil's eyes finally landed on me. I was suddenly very aware of the fact that my hair was tangled up like a rat's nest from being flattened on the ground.

_How attractive._

I sat up, trying my best to appear as graceful as one could with a dirt-stained shirt and pieces of grass in my hair. My eyes were still focused on Quil as he approached with a grin that grew ever wider upon taking in my disheveled appearance. I may have looked like a mess, but Quil looked HOT. Even from a distance, the ripples of his well-formed abdomen looked enticing as ever.

"Sexy…" The word escaped my lips in a breathy whisper and I cringed, desperately hoping that they hadn't heard it. Luckily the guys seemed to be more distracted by laughing at something Embry was saying rather than my slip-up. Audrey however, was looking back and forth between Quil and me with a confused expression that obviously didn't bode well.

_Better keep your mouth shut, kid!_

Grayson went running up to meet the guys as they reached the spot where I was still sitting on the ground like some weird loser. Why the hell didn't I just stand up? Oops, too late. Quil was right in front of me now.

"Need some help there Claire-bear?" Quil asked while offering a hand down to me. His eyes twinkled with amusement and I batted his hand away.

"I got this, no worries." I attempted to lithely move into a standing position, but ending up stumbling forward until Quil steadied me with a hand on my elbow.

"Yea, totally in control," he quipped with a deep chuckle. I shrugged him off, trying not to be embarrassed.

"So, what were you guys doing in the woo—"

"What does 'sexy' mean?" Audrey blurted out at the same time I began my own question. I'm pretty sure my jaw dropped all the way to the grass.

_MOTHER EFF. _

"Why would you ask that Auds?" Jacob inquired, as he and his two, over-sized counterparts stared at her completely confused. I could feel my mouth opening and closing like a goldfish out of water while I searched for the right words to remedy this situation.

"Heh heh uh huh," I began unintelligibly, earning quizzical looks from all around. "You're funny Audrey, but you shouldn't go repeating stuff you hear from…from _television_ y'know?"

Audrey's eyebrows pinched together. "But I didn't hear it from TV, _you_ said it!"

Jacob and Embry exchanged a meaningful look before dissolving into a round of infuriating snickers. I couldn't even bring myself to glance at Quil.

"I um I didn't mean...ah you know I was just…" Words completely failed me and I could feel the hot flush taking over my cheeks. Audrey stared up at me innocently like she hadn't just knifed me in the fucking back.

"But Clairey-fairy…" She continued, using the strange nickname she had come up with for me. "Why is Uncle Quil _sexy_?"

_Demon child!_

Embry let out a laugh that sounded like a cat being strangled while I died inside. There was no way out of this now. Lifting my gaze from the ground, I allowed my eyes to wander over to Quil who was staring at me in what appeared to be shock.

"I didn't say that," I mumbled uselessly, still hoping that there was some way to maintain my pride. Quil's eyes pinned me intently. "I said-I said something else. This is just stupid."

Jacob must have taken pity on me because he was suddenly at my side, nodding encouragingly. "Sure thing Claire. Now let's all go have some lunch. What do you say Grayson? Audrey?"

The kids voiced their enthusiastic agreement before running off toward the house, Jake following close behind. Embry gave me a knowing smirk and then walked off as well. That left Quil and I standing there alone.

_Can somebody say awkward?_

"So…" Quil breathed out while shoving his hands into the pockets of his shorts. I could already feel the blush getting worse.

"Want lunch?" I exclaimed and started to move in the direction of the house. Quil frowned for a moment, but then shrugged and signaled his agreement with a nod.

_That could have gone worse I suppose.  
><em>

A few seconds later we entered Sam and Emily's living room, the limited space already becoming busy with people eating. Emily paused briefly in her attempt to make the kids use napkins to direct Quil and me toward the kitchen.

"You should get your food before Sam and Paul come back!" Paul's wife Rachel said with a laugh as she passed by us on her way to the living room. Ever since that vampire had almost attacked me, the guys had been running extra patrols and even Uncle Sam had phased despite the fact that he had declared himself retired a few years ago.

In the kitchen, Embry and Jacob were helping themselves to heaping portions of a few different casseroles and salads. It was no surprise to me that their plates sagged noticeably under the weight of mountains of food.

"You know you'll probably get the chance to eat again in this lifetime, right?" I muttered, finally finding my voice again after the horrible 'sexy' incident. They turned as if just noticing me for the first time and shot me identical grins.

"Well we just want to make sure we get it while it's _hot_," Jake explained with over-emphasis on the last descriptor. "Everything's better that way_. _Wouldn't you say so Claire? You like _hot_ things?"

I glared, knowing he wasn't referring to food, but rather my taste in men. Well, Quil really. It's not like it was any secret that I checked him out on a daily basis. The only one oblivious to the fact was Quil and now he was probably confused as heck wondering why his supposed 'best friend' was going around calling him sexy.

"Can you guys just move and let me get something to eat?" I mumbled and pushed my way around Embry's large body to grab some utensils.

Embry smiled down at me. "Okay then, moving out."

I could hear them padding softly out of the kitchen while I began spooning helpings of cheesy potato bake onto my plate. Quil had remained mostly silent for the past few minutes and my mind went into overdrive wondering what he was thinking about.

"Pass me a fork Claire?" Quil's deep voice was suddenly very close to my ear. I nodded, reaching over the casseroles to grab one off of the counter.

"Here you go." I turned a little to the side and was met with the sight of Quil's chest directly in line with my face.

_Wow. _

It's embarrassing to admit, but I actually gulped audibly like a nervous little kid. It took all of my strength to force my eyes upward and hold the fork out to him.

"Thanks," Quil intoned in a light voice that suggested he was suppressing a smile. I turned away from his pecs and continued to load my plate, hoping I wouldn't embarrass myself anymore than I already had. There had to be a limit for one day, right?

_Guhhhh…_

My body froze as I felt Quil's solid chest brushing up against my back. Two brawny arms reached around me to grab a plate and heap some squash casserole onto one corner.

"Pardon my reach." Quil was so close that I could actually _feel_ his voice reverberating throughout his body. "I'm just impatient I guess?"

He chuckled softly, resulting in another delicious vibration against my back. I'm sure our proximity allowed him to feel the pathetic shiver that coursed through me in response to his actions.

"Y-yea I'm sure you're hungry after…wait what was it you were doing with the guys today?" I questioned in a breathy voice.

"Well…" Quil began and I automatically shifted around to look at him. He had his plate in one hand, but the other was braced against the countertop, effectively boxing me in. "They had patrol earlier and then stopped by my place after they were done. We decided just to run over here...you know nice opportunity for exercise."

He smiled at me revealing white teeth that seemed to gleam against his bronze skin. The image turned even sexier when he lifted a spoon up to his mouth to lick off a bit of casserole. How was I supposed to keep my crazy inner perv under control when he looked so damn fine all the time?

"Okay. Well we should probably go join the others right?"

Quil stared down at me fixedly. "Yea probably."

Why was he looking at me like that? I moved forward a bit, expecting him to step away and allow me to pass, but he didn't budge.

"Um Quil? Aren't we going into the living room?"

"I guess we could do that, but I figured since we're _best buds_ and all, we might have done our own thing?" Quil's gaze was practically burning into my face as he studied me with an intensity that contradicted his easygoing tone.

_Dude. This is gettin weird._

I squirmed under his probing stare, dropping a few crumbs off of my plate in the process. "We did stuff...on our own. Obviously…" Quil's mouth quirked up on one side as I fumbled my words. "That's what best friends do. But we ate with everyone too so yea. We can go in there if you want or if you want to just stay in here that's cool too. You're so fine!"

Quil was full out grinning now and I choked, realizing I had just mistakenly implied that Quil was fine-looking. "I mean, _I'm _totally fine. You know, with-with staying in here."

"Uh-huh." Quil replied in amused voice, his eyebrows rising closer to his hairline.

I looked down at my plate so I wouldn't have to meet his gaze any longer. It was obvious that he could pick up on my attraction to him and thought it was some entertaining joke. "I think I'll go into the living room now."

Quil finally lifted his arm off of the counter in response to my resigned tone and shifted backwards a few inches. I kept my eyes downcast walking past him, trying my best not to seem like the silly teenage girl that he apparently thought I was.

"Hey, wait a sec."

I paused in the doorway. "Yea?"

The laughter had left Quil's face to be replaced by a cautious expression. I wasn't really sure why. "I heard from Embry that your birthday is coming up and I was wondering what you want to do for it."

_My birthday huh? Can I have __**you**__ wrapped up with a big red bow?_

"I don't know," I mumbled back, picking at my food with a fork. "You don't have to worry about it really. I'm sure Emily will make me dinner or something."

"What? No, it's gotta be more exciting than _that_!" Quil moved forward to invade my personal space once again. Didn't he notice what that did to me? Sheesh!

I frowned. "I'm cool with not doing anything."

Quil was shaking his head in dissent even as the sentence left my mouth. "I'll figure something out. That's what friends are for right?"

_Friends_. There it was again. My punishment for being a fucking coward. Granted, I still felt conflicted as ever about forcing him back into an imprint that may or may not have been unfair to him, but it didn't change the fact that I desperately wanted more than friendship.

"Quil, you don't have to—"

Quil held up a hand to silence me. "C'mon Claire-bear, I _want_ to. I won't let you down as a best friend, I promise."

He was really taking this best friend arrangement seriously wasn't he? Or maybe he kept bringing up the fact that we're friends to remind me that melting into a puddle of goo every time he smiled at me was probably not appropriate BFF behavior?

"Alright. If you're that set on it, then okay," I responded, smiling when Quil's face lit up excitedly. It was so reminiscent of how he used to always beam at me that I almost forgot that his injury had ever happened. _Almost_. He still wasn't sure how to act around me; it was obvious in the way he would shift from teasing to unsure depending on how he read my expressions.

"It'll be fun Claire," Quil assured me, mistaking my pensive look for indecision about letting him plan my birthday. "Trust me."

I had to lighten up or he wasn't going to let this go was he?

"Okay Mr. Party Planner. It better be awesome then."

Quil and I both grinned at each other and I finally felt some of the tension dissipate between us. Satisfied with my positive response, Quil brushed past me, managing to rub up against my body more than was probably necessary considering how much space we had in the kitchen.

_RAWR._

I sucked in a sharp breath at the contact and was met with Quil's roguish grin before he breezed out of the kitchen. It seemed that he was now deliberately making me uncomfortable!

_What a tease! _

I pushed the embarrassment out of my mind and followed him out to the living room where I could at least pretend to focus on eating my food. Curse my stupid big mouth letting things like 'sexy' slip out within earshot of blabbermouth children.

A few hours later, Quil and the guys were gone off to do some work on Jacob's dad's house and I was left alone with Emily washing a bunch of dirty dishes. This was possibly the biggest downfall of being a supposed 'wolf-girl.' I fucking _hate_ doing dishes.

"So Claire," My Aunt began, obviously starting to launch into a probing talk. Greeeat. "I'm glad you and Quil are getting so close again."

I paused in the middle of rinsing off a cluster of spoons to glance at her. "Yep. We're pals again I guess."

"I never thought that you would have any trouble being friends Claire. A head injury couldn't break that bond." Emily had completely stopped scrubbing at the dishes and was now turned to face me. I could tell where this conversation was headed.

"So have you thought about…maybe telling him the whole truth?" Emily questioned softly.

_Of course. The IMPRINT. _

I shrugged, still focusing on my hands as they moved under the running water. "You mean, tell him about the imprint?"

"Yes. Don't you think he has a right to know?"

"I don't know."

I could hear Emily's heavy sigh and I knew she was disappointed with my open fear of telling him. "Claire, I know you're worried he won't respond well to the news, but you shouldn't be. The imprint is stronger than you think. He has to feel that connection to you still. He just has—"

"Stop!" I blurted out, finally shifting to stare at her. It was apparent by her wide eyes, that I had shocked her with my interruption, but I couldn't take it anymore. "I'm sorry…I just don't want to ruin everything by springing the imprint on him. He's already stressed out enough as it is with not phasing."

Emily regained her composure and reached over to pat me on the arm comfortingly. "I know honey. This has been so hard on you. You don't have to tell him anything until you're ready."

"Thanks," I mumbled, feeling guilty. "I didn't mean to freak out or anything…"

Emily let out a little giggle. "You think I'm not used to your dramatic ways?"

"Hey now!" I huffed jokingly and she laughed again.

"You know I'm kidding Claire-bear. But, I do think you should consider telling him soon. I heard from Embry that he's not exactly as happy as he's letting on."

_Wait, what?_

"What do you mean?" I asked becoming instantly tense. She raised her hands up in a placating gesture, apparently seeing the worry on my face.

"It's nothing big Claire, just that he's still pretty confused since the accident. Embry mentioned that he seems to want to be alone more and doesn't act as enthusiastic about doing things he normally would."

Quil was unhappy? I frowned as I remembered the conversation we'd had after he picked me up from the party. He _had_ said something about not understanding what he was doing with his life, hadn't he?

"Don't worry honey," Emily soothed. "He's doing fine, but it's difficult for him trying to adjust to everything . And maybe…" She paused for a moment evidently trying to find the right words. "Maybe if you told him about the imprint, he would realize what's bothering him."

I made a noncommittal grunt in the back of my throat. How would the imprint help anything? I could see it now: Me telling Quil that he was eternally bound to me and him being like 'Jesus, aren't you just a little teenager?'

He'd heard earlier today that I thought he was hot and what had his response been? Oh right, amusement and teasing. It would take more than the knowledge of some stupid imprint for him to actually _feel_ anything for me. Attraction would have to come naturally for Quil.

_Shit. How can I grow giant boobs and a bangin ass fast?_

"Claire?" Emily was staring at me with concern. "You're gripping that butter knife a little tightly."

"Oh." I dropped the piece of silverware into the sink with a metallic clang before examining the indents the dull edge had left on my palm.

"So I won't force you to tell him anything, you know that right?" I nodded at her. "And I know Sam won't let the guys say anything either, even though they've all been good about it so far."

"Cool."

Emily smiled and turned back to the dishes while I stood there wondering how I would get Quil to want me even without the imprint. I had already tried to bring his memory back using photos and stories with no success. Maybe I just needed to accept that it wasn't coming back and thus, neither was the imprint and our old relationship. I would have to make a new one.

_Activate sexy Claire mode!_

Somehow I would make Quil realize that I wasn't a kid, but rather girlfriend material. It was time to bust out of the friend zone for good!

* * *

><p><strong>AN**: I know. Chapter is blahh. Update is super late. My totally lame excuses: 1. I have been down South on the family farm where there is no phone service OR internet. *gasp* Yes, such places do still exist. 2. I broke my finger while playing football at aforementioned farm and it's a bitch to type with a giant metal finger brace. Apologies. I hope this chapter will at least satiate you until the next, hopefully more substantial one. THANKS A BUNCH. Reviews have been so wonderful :D And a heads up: next update may not be as soon as I would like cuz I'm heading off to Vegas for a week. You can't blame me for that right? hehe ;)


	16. Feel It in My Bones

**Chapter 16**

_What rushes into my heart and my skull_  
><em>I can't control<em>  
><em>I feel you in my bones<em>  
><em>You're knocking at my windows<em>  
><em>You're slow to letting me go<em>  
><em>And I know this feeling oh, so<em>  
><em>This feeling in my bones<em>

-Feel It in My Bones by Tegan and Sara

"Damn it damn it FUCK this is _not_ working!"

"Just like push em in there! C'mon you can do it Claire!"

I moaned in pain as I attempted to force my noncompliant feet into a pair of Riley's heels that were honestly a size too small and also taller than anything I had ever worn.

_That's basically anything taller than a pair of Converse sneakers. Heh._

My foot was smashed into what was supposedly a 'peep-toe' opening, the second and third toes protruding through the hole like some freakish marine animal coming out of its shell. I kinda doubted it was supposed to look like that.

"Um Ry, these hurt like hell…seriously how are these attractive to guys?" I grumbled while working on shimmying my other foot into the next torture device. Riley snorted in a rather unladylike fashion from where she was lounging on the couch.

"They make your ass look nice. That's about it."

With both shoes on, I began my first attempt at walking around the living room. I looked like a crippled version of that weird alien on Star Wars-Jar Jar Binks…y'know the one that bounds around being all annoying and shit.

"I think guys like heels because in case a girl wants to ditch him, she physically _can't_." I tried to illustrate my point by breaking into a jog. It only resulted in me falling flat on my ass on the thankfully carpeted, floor. "See? The minute she makes a break for it—BAM! Bitch is face down on the pavement!"

Riley started laughing so hard that she rolled onto the floor next to me, clutching her stomach and wheezing. Yea, my family has always been a tad dramatic.

"Claire," She managed to mutter in between bouts of infectious giggling that had me joining in. "This is why I freakin love you. You make putting a pair of shoes on into some insane battle!"

I grinned over at her and lifted my heel-clad feet up to wiggle in her face. "I think the shoes won this round."

"Unfortunately yes. They got the best of you, child." Riley shook her head in mock disapproval before crawling back onto the couch. I felt much too drained from my high heel throwdown to extricate myself from the floor and make the short trip to nearby furniture.

"How am I ever going to impress Quil at my birthday party if I can't even walk in these?" I complained to my sister, throwing my head down on the carpet with a sigh.

"Oh please Claire. You don't need to wear those to impress Quil. Just like tell him his fur is really pretty or something…I'm sure he'll be slobbering all over you in a second."

I knew Riley was joking, but I glared at her regardless. She just didn't take my plan to attract Quil seriously!

"You know if I mention anything about his wolf form, he'll get fussy because he hasn't phased in forever! And this is _serious business_ here! You need to focus and help me with the plan."

Riley looked like she was trying to suppress laughter with much difficulty. "Fine. So the Get At Quil _plan_." She wriggled her eyebrows around. "What was the point of it again?"

"Shock and awe, Riley! SHOCK. AND. AWE." I replied with as serious of a tone as I could manage under the circumstances. "I have to get him to realize that I'm not some little teen fangirl, but instead an irresistible temptress—"

"Wait, _temptress_? _You?_" Riley was laughing openly now and I finally forced myself into a sitting position so that I looked more dignified. "God Claire you really are over the top today. Did you eat chocolate chips straight out of the bag again? Cuz if you remember correctly, I told you those are for _baking_."

"Ugh no! I didn't touch those babies!" I yelled, getting defensive. She had agreed to help me in my mission to amaze Quil on my birthday and now was making fun of me about it. Some big sister she was!

_Maybe she'll make cookies with those chocolate chips though? I would be okay with that._

Riley stared at me skeptically, obviously doubting my chocolate chip denial. I did have a bad history with that kind of thing after all. I huffed indignantly while rising to my feet still wearing the high-heel death traps.

_FUCKIN HELL these hurt. _

"You suck Riley," I spat bitterly, not caring that she hardly deserved my bratty attitude.

"What now? That's the thanks I get for loaning you a pair of killer shoes?"

I couldn't help rolling my eyes despite the fact I knew it made me look immature, the opposite of what I was going for. "Yea they're _killer_ alright. Practically killed me just to take a fucking step in them! How do you even wear these?"

Riley shrugged, evidently not affected by my insults. "You get used to them after a while. Plus, it's not like I'm running around in stilettos at work or something. It's more for going out and stuff."

_At this rate, I'll never be going out with anyone, let alone Quileute warrior men!_

I suddenly reached down to tear the heels off of my feet. It was stupid of me to think that I could pull off something so overtly sexy.

"I just thought that if I…I don't know could show up wearing _these_ Quil would see me differently," I mumbled with no small amount of embarrassment. I could see Riley's gaze softening from my quick glances at her face.

"_Claire_. I'm being completely serious now," She began in a more earnest tone. "You need to stop worrying about growing up so fast! You're only seventeen—"

"Soon to be eighteen tomorrow!" I corrected her with lightning speed and she sighed in response.

"Fine. You're only _almost eighteen_ and while I understand where you're coming from with the whole Quil thing, I think he'll like you better if you just act like your normal, lovable self."

"But I don't want him to just _like _me!" I protested, feeling more and more distraught.

Riley scrutinized my expressed for a moment, before she padded off toward her bedroom, mumbling something about 'stupid teen hormones' under her breath. A few seconds later she was back with some clothing articles clutched in her hands.

"Here." She shoved the small bundle toward me. "You'll look hot in this outfit."

I lifted up a teal v-neck shirt that honestly didn't look like much of anything, followed by a jean skirt that was pretty short considering my usual attire.

_And holy shit!_

"Is that a push-up bra?" I exclaimed, grasping the lacy garment in one hand. Riley shot me a smirk I was very familiar with.

"Don't freak out, it's nothing too wild. Just something to make you _feel _sexy. That's what really matters most."

"Um I think the _point_ is my boobs are gonna look amazing!" I responded excitedly earning an eye-roll from my big sis. She had always been more adept in the fashion department whereas I generally kept things quite casual. I blame the fact that I was practically raised by a pack of wolves who pretty much despised wearing anything more than a pair of shorts.

_Hmm shorts. Quil in shorts. Quil being sexy in shorts..._

Riley cleared her throat. "Oookay Claire-bear. Just wear the bra with the shirt…it'll give you a little cleavage and then the skirt will showcase some leg. Happy now?"

I smiled triumphantly as my plans finally seemed to be coming together. "Yes! I'm gonna blow his mind so hard that his memories will come back crying like a lost puppy!"

My enthusiasm was met with a confused stare from Riley." Uh what the fuck? That was unintentionally sexual and wrong and just plain weird. I'm warning you again: no chocolate chips from the bag. Diabetes is not a joke!"

I waved off her comments with a dismissive hand flick and ran back to my room to change into my new outfit. And damn, she was right. I did look pretty hot.

_Well hello boobs. You are closer to my face now. _

"Hey Claire…" Riley chirped, poking her head into my room abruptly. She caught a glance of me posturing in front of the mirror and grinned. "Woah lookin fine!"

I chuckled, but couldn't help but feel pleased. My chest was now distinguishable from a man's and I even had some CLEAVAGE due to the low cut V-neck!

"Anyway, you should wear your hair down tomorrow. Loose and wavy will look nice and hmm wait a sec," she disappeared for a moment before returning with a pair of dangly earrings. "Wear _these_. They're really cute…" She paused, catching the disgruntled look on my face. "I mean they look _sexy_."

My phone started going off right after Riley walked out and I had to rifle furiously through my messy room to locate it.

"Hello?" I answered likely on the last ring.

"Hey Claire I hope you're ready to go because I'm gonna be there in like 10 minutes."

_Quil? _

I launched myself onto the bed, my heart already speeding up with excitement. "Hold up! What are you talking about?"

Quil chuckled at my incredulous tone. "I'm taking to you to Port Angeles today."

"But why?" I choked out embarrassingly before getting my voice under control. "Did we make plans or something? Because if we did, I totally spazzed and forgot all about them."

"Nope no spazzing involved. Just me making plans for you." I could definitely hear the smile in his voice as he listened to me fumble through the conversation. "I heard that you have some favorite ice cream place there?"

_OMG Swirly's!_

"Yes! I always went there with you!" I exclaimed. This was going to be the best day ever and it wasn't even my birthday yet! Speaking of which, why wasn't he just waiting to see me until tomorrow at my birthday get-together?

Quil seemed to be reading my mind somehow because the next words out of his mouth answered my question. "Great. It'll be like a pre-birthday thing since one day isn't enough obviously."

"Obviously," I repeated back to him, giddy with anticipation.

"And I was serious about being there in 10 minutes, so hope that's cool!" He didn't even give me a chance to answer before he laughed and hung up, leaving me with my mouth gaping open in surprise. Ten minutes was NOT enough time to get sexified for a kinda, sorta _date_ with Quil!

"RILEY! Quil is picking me up in 10 minutes! HELP! This is not a drill, this is not a drill!"

After Riley informed me that I should just wear what I already had on and she would find me something else for my birthday, I barely had time to get a brush through my hair and put on some lipgloss before Quil was bangin at my door.

_Eeeek!_

I almost went running to answer it until I realized it would be much smoother to face him not panting like a dog. Gotta keep it chill, man.

"Claire? Where are you?" Quil's voice suddenly sounded out through the house making me jump. Of course he would just let himself in.

"Coming!"

When I entered the living room, Quil was leaning up against the wall looking hot as usual in a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. I paused for a second to admire him and noticed that his eyes seemed to widen a little as they flicked over my body. Was he checking me out? Or was he just surprised that I actually looked like a girl for once?

"So Port Angeles then?" I remarked after a few moments of Quil not saying anything. He gave his head a little shake before focusing in on my eager expression.

"Uh yea. Port Angeles. Ready to go?"

I nodded, shouted goodbye to Riley, and then we headed out to Quil's truck. Luckily Quil was already in his seat as I clambered up into the cab because my ass was definitely hanging out by the end of the process. Jeans are just so much more practical than short skirts!

"So why the sudden urge to get ice cream?" I asked as soon as we were on the road to Port Angeles. Quil tilted his head to the side, apparently considering the question carefully.

"I just thought it would be fun to do something today," he mused. "Tomorrow the whole pack will be there trying to monopolize you."

_So he wants me for himself? _

"Yea true. Plus I'm always down for Swirly's!" The thought of my favorite ice cream parlor got me wondering about something though. "But how did you know that it's my favorite?"

Quil looked almost sheepish under his grin. "Well I actually have this picture in my room."

"Picture?" I mumbled confusedly.

"Yea. It's of…well _you_ from a while ago…I'm not sure how old you were. Maybe ten or eleven? Anyway, you have an ice cream cone in your hand with like four giant scoops on top and seriously, you look freakin ecstatic."

Quil chuckled warmly while I thought back to the day he was referring to. The memory flooded my mind: a hot summer afternoon, four delicious scoops of cookie dough ice cream, and Quil all to myself. Thinking about how much fun we'd had together made me feel a little melancholy, despite the fact that the scenario seemed to be repeating itself in many ways.

"I asked Embry where the place was at and he told me about it so yea," Quil interrupted my thoughts with his deep voice. "Hope that's alright."

"Of course it is. Thanks, Quil."

I started to bring my legs up onto the seat, but quickly remembered what I was wearing and how that posture might look a little inappropriate. Instead I settled for crossing them at the knee. The movement drew Quil's eyes downward until they rested on the exposed flesh of my legs causing me to tighten them together instinctually.

_Ummm…_

He quickly averted his eyes back to the road, but I was left feeling distinctly warmer than I had been moments ago. Honestly it was embarrassing how a simple glance could cause me to overheat.

"So how's the memory therapy going?" I questioned in an attempt to keep my mind from straying into dangerous territory. Quil's posture seemed to loosen up a bit in response to my inquiry and I briefly wondered why.

"Oh it's good. It's not what I thought it would be like…way more relaxed actually."

"So does the therapist make you lay down on a couch or something?"

Quil laughed. "No nothing like that. Basically we talk about the people and events I _do _remember for now. Apparently there's steps or something I have to go through? But anyway, it's kind of like hanging out more or less."

_Hanging out? How was that supposed to help him remember anything about ME?_

"Huh okay. Has it helped you remember stuff at all?" I asked cautiously. Last time we'd talked about the memory issue it had involved our big fight and I did not want to stir up anything.

"Well not really at this point, but Celeste says that's normal and that it could take a while before anything comes back."

"Celeste?"

"Oh sorry," Quil answered. "Celeste is the therapist I meet with."

I immediately flashed back to the image I had of a friendly, older hippy woman who made tea and smelled like tree bark. "Oh okay cool."

Soon enough we arrived at the ice cream parlor and I couldn't keep myself from bounding inside the small establishment eagerly. I could hear Quil's amused laugh from behind me, but I didn't even care if he thought I was immature; I was getting my cookie dough tower of deliciousness!

_Yesss!_

"You have the same look on your face that you had in the picture," Quil remarked after we were seated in a booth together eating our prospective ice cream cones.

"Whatever," I mumbled happily though I was far more focused on licking away at my frozen treat than Quil's observations. "It's just so damn good!"

Quil grinned at me from across the table and then laughed outright after a few more seconds of my merciless attack on the ice cream. "Geeze Claire, you just spread it all over your face!"

"What? Where?" I grabbed a napkin and started to scrub at my cheeks hoping I didn't look _that_ ridiculous. Quil kept chortling as his eyes raked over my apparently messy appearance.

"So did I get it?" I wondered after a few more wipes of the napkin. Quil shook his head and motioned for me to move forward.

"Here. Let me do it."

Both of us leaned in toward one another and I felt my pulse quicken marginally in response to the up-close view of Quil's masculine features. His brow scrunched adorably in concentration as he reached a hand up to my cheek and used his thumb to wipe at a spot near my jawline.

"Got it," he breathed, lowering his hand slowly from my face. I was probably imagining things, but I could have sworn that Quil peeked down at my cleavage as we backed away from each other into our respective seats. Even considering the idea made me blush.

The rest of our time at the ice cream shop was far less eventful, but still fun and I relished having Quil's undivided attention. I had really missed doing things like this together.

_If only we were on a real date though..._

Far too soon we were finished eating and needed to head back to good ole La Push. We had only taken a few steps out of the building however, when a cheery, female voice called out from across the parking lot.

"Quil!"

_What the…?_

Suddenly I spotted a tall, shapely woman striding purposefully toward us with a large smile stretched across her face. I was about to ask Quil if he knew this person when he unexpectedly began moving toward her as well. My feet trailed along after him seemingly of their own accord.

"Hey Celeste!" He chirped when we had reached the woman. "What're you doing here?"

_Holy Crap! __**That's **_his therapist?

Celeste was young. Celeste was well-dressed. Celeste was very attractive.

My inner bitch roared for a cat-fight. Where was the homely cat-lady psychologist that I pictured? And was _this _pair of long shapely legs the reason why Quil didn't seem to mind going to his therapy sessions that much?

_Fuckity fuck._

Celeste reached out to shake my hand and I had to resist the urge to twist her wrist into one of those painful self-defense holds Seth had taught me. Instead I allowed myself to grip her perfectly manicured, impossibly soft fingers. Of course she would have nice hands. The world just sucks like that.

I plastered a fake smile on my face as I attempted to be rational and feminist about the whole thing. What kind of woman would I be if I was immediately intimidated by one of my intelligent, attractive soul sisters?

_Just relax. _

I watched with eagle eyes as she placed a hand on Quil's forearm and smiled flirtatiously at him. Okay screw feminism, that bitch was going down.

"Hello I'm Celeste Wright, Quil's therapist," she said with a smile. Perfectly white teeth of course. Just fucking lovely. It took me exactly five more seconds than it should have to respond to her greeting. Quil noticed and cocked an eyebrow at me.

"Um yea I'm Claire. Claire Young. Quil's friend."

"Of course! I've heard about you in our sessions. I can't reveal too much about those though, can I? Patient confidentially and all that." She gave a light laugh and Quil smiled in her direction. It was nauseating and I instantly regretted eating all of that ice cream earlier.

"Yep especially if he starts revealing that he has that split personality thing…I'm sure you know his alter ego Quilly-sue. She's pretty high maintenance." I started to laugh_, _but quickly realized that Celeste was looking at me with confusion rather than humor in her gaze. Quil was shaking his head, but I could see his lips quirking up into the beginnings of a laugh.

_God Claire! BE NORMAL FOR FIVE SECONDS._

"I'm just kidding you know," I clarified when Celeste had stared at me for too long. "Maybe Quil's told you I like to um joke?"

Celeste nodded resulting in beams of light reflecting off of her shiny, dark hair. "Yes he's definitely described your _unique_ personality."

_Bitch pleeease._

Her tone wasn't outright mocking, but the way she said 'unique' just pissed me off. I peeked up at Quil who was watching me like I was an untamed animal who had been let out of its cage for the first time. Apparently my facial expressions had given me away like always.

"Well I think Claire and I should probably head out," Quil intoned casually while shifting to face Celeste. "Since we still have the drive back to La Push."

Celeste gave a slight frown before flashing her megawatt smile at him again. "Alright. I'll see you soon then Quil." She turned to look at me. "And nice meeting you Claire. I'm sure we'll see each other again!"

_Not if I can help it._

I forced myself to smile, knowing my parents had spent time teaching me manners for a reason. "Nice meeting you too. Have a good evening." _Hag._

The last word was thankfully spoken aloud in my mind only and I did regret it a little after she walked off to her own vehicle. I had always disliked when girls hated other girls simply because they thought of them as competition and now I was acting just like that.

"So that was a big coincidence huh?" Quil said nonchalantly once we were in the truck.

I shrugged, trying my best to seem indifferent. God forbid he thought I was jealous of Therapist Barbie. "Yep. What are the chances of that.. But she seems very…nice."

"Yea Celeste is cool and I think she really wants to help me out."

"Great."

I didn't want to be jealous, but the fact that they seemed so _friendly _was disconcerting for me. I knew I was probably reading too far into things, especially since she was his therapist and having a relationship with a patient had to be against like therapy-code, right?

_Most def!_

As I pondered Celeste's intentions, I finally came to the conclusion that I couldn't worry about the behavior of a woman I had no control over. What I _did _have control over was _my _actions and tomorrow my birthday would be the time to start acting like the adult I was becoming.

Eighteen years old baby! Look out Quil!

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Shootdang I managed a quick update? YOU'RE WELCOME ;) This was written on a plane BTW, so I definitely went the extra mile to make you guys happy. I just love ya'll so much and all your awesome reviews! Keep em comin please! AND NOW: VEGASSSS. **


	17. Birthday Cake

**Chapter 17**

_I know you want it in the worst way  
>Can't wait to blow my candles out<br>He want that cake, cake,  
>Cake, cake, cake, cake, cake<br>Cake, cake, cake, cake, cake_

-Birthday Cake by Rihanna

I woke up the next morning to the most amazing smell in the world: Chocolate chip muffins.

_Happy Birthday to Me!_

"Riley!" I yelled, not yet attempting to drag myself out of bed. "You made muffins?"

I heard my sister's soft laughter echo from the kitchen before her footsteps were audible moving closer to my room. A moment later her pajama-clad form was propped in the doorway, a large grin on her face.

"Happy birthday lil sis! I figured breakfast would be the best birthday gift I could give you."

I sighed happily and let my head fall back onto the pillow. She knew me so well. "So you are pretty much the best sister ever."

Riley nodded without a hint of modesty. "Oh I know. Now get your butt out of bed so we can feast!"

As I watched her take off down the hallway it hit me. I WAS EIGHTEEN YEARS OLD NOW. The revelation made me giddy enough to launch myself out of my bed, knocking a few old stuffed animals onto the floor in my haste.

"Oh my god I'm eighteen! I'm a real person now!" I exclaimed to no one in particular. I could hear Riley laughing again and the sound reminded me that breakfast awaited only a few rooms away.

"Don't start eating without me Ry!" '

My ratty stuffed duck Petrie squeaked in protest as I stepped on him in my mad rush to get to the kitchen. "Oops sorry buddy," I mumbled before running off down the hallway.

_Eighteen year-olds need sustenance yo. _

My entrance into the kitchen was met with another enthusiastic "Happy Birthday" from Riley, but this time made more meaningful by the fact that she was holding a plate of warm muffins in her hands.

"Eat up Claire-bear!" She chimed while nudging me toward the table with her foot. "Plus I have something else to give you…"

"Mmmwhaa?" I garbled out, already chewing a large bite of muffin. Riley only smiled before leaving the room to get god knows what.

_More muffins?_

I popped another piece in my mouth as my sister walked back in holding a bright blue bag.

"Here," she thrust the bag in my direction. "I bought this for you."

I clutched the blue paper and shook it instinctively. "What is it?"

Riley raised her eyebrow at me. "You can open it you know."

"Oh. Well if I _have to_," I groaned sarcastically while sifting through the tissue paper to grasp at what felt like a soft shirt. Pulling out the piece of clothing, I realized that it was actually a cute, flirty dress in a dark purple color that I immediately loved.

"Oh my god I love it! You're the best Ry!"

She beamed at me. "Now you can stop worrying about what to wear for your birthday party later. This color is great on you."

I ran my hand over the soft material, but paused when a sudden memory filled my mind. "This was mom's favorite color."

Riley nodded slowly, a cautious expression on her face. I had been known to randomly lose it over the simplest things when it came to my parents. Take for example the time I burst into tears picking out a pineapple in the grocery store just because it reminded me of my dad's favorite dessert, pineapple upside-down cake. I had gotten some weird looks over that one.

"Claire?" Riley spoke softly. "I'll...do your hair later if you want? Your party isn't for a while anyway so we have plenty of time to do whatever."

I nodded, burying the painful memories back down where they belonged. Today was supposed to be a happy day right?

"Sure. Sounds good."

After eating and lounging around for a while, we watched a few home videos of my old birthdays which had always been a tradition in my family. Usually though Quil was here to watch alongside us.

_I gotta get him back!_

Seeing my younger self happy and celebrating with Quil only strengthened my resolve to make him notice me. I had to step up my game.

Riley made due on her promise to help me get ready, styling my thick hair into long, loose waves that fell artfully past my shoulders. I put on some earrings, but decided I would skip the heels seeing as I wanted to actually _walk _into my party. Finally it came time for the dress.

_Please fit. Please fit._

I slipped on the garment and let out a squeal when it formed to my body perfectly, just the right size. I spent way too long primping in front of the mirror until Riley asked if I was planning on asking myself out and I grudgingly followed her out of the room.

_I'm kinda hot, what can I say?_

It wasn't until we pulled up at Sam and Emily's house and a few of the guys ran out to greet me that I began to question my decision to look all feminine and pretty. The pack was going to have a freakin field day with this.

_Maybe they won't notice?_

I climbed out of the car, taking care not to hike the hem of my dress up too high and automatically smoothing down the material as I stood up. I really shouldn't have bothered.

"Happy Birthday Triple C!" Collin's excited voice chirped before his body came crashing into mine, wrinkling my dress terribly.

"Is that Claire?" I heard Brady call out and suddenly he was hugging me from the other side like I was the peanut butter in some weird wolf sandwich.

"Guys!" I shouted in a winded voice. "I CAN'T BREATHE."

I felt them laugh in unison as they finally set me back down on my feet.

"Geeze are you trying to kill me?" I grumbled, attempting to move past them to follow Riley into the house. I barely made it an inch before two over-sized bodies were blocking my path.

"Oh my god. Is that a _dress_?"

_Here it comes…_

I tried my best to appear menacing as I glared up at Collin and Brady who were grinning like twin Cheshire cats…or _wolves_ I guess. Whatever.

"Well would you look at that!" Collin exclaimed in mock amazement. "You _are_ a girl!"

Brady guffawed loudly earning a proud grin from Collin. I bristled, knowing the teasing could last all damn night if I didn't put a stop to it now.

"Kiss my ass Pop-Tart."

Collin put on a show of looking terribly affronted despite the fact that he and Brady were still chortling. "Claire! That wasn't very ladylike, was it?"

"Well neither is kicking you in the balls, but I'm willing to do it."

A loud laugh that I immediately recognized rang out from behind Collin and Brady and I sucked in an excited breath. To my delight, Quil appeared between my immature friends, placing a hand on each of their shoulders.

"I think Claire means business guys," he said seriously, though his eyes were twinkling. "You probably shouldn't tempt her."

"She knows we're just playing!" Brady whined and Collin nodded his agreement. Quil chuckled before giving them each a shove toward the house.

"Emily needs help carrying food out back so get over there."

They groaned, Collin mumbling about 'slave labor' under his breath, but did as Quil said and disappeared around the side of the house. I glanced up at Quil's tall form looming over me confidently and gave a slight wave.

"Hey Claire."

"Hey," I mumbled back softly, suddenly self-conscious under his stare.

"So…Happy Birthday," he rumbled in his deep baritone voice and I think my heart did some kind of gymnastic move under my ribcage.

"Thanks."

His eyes flitted once over my body so quick that I almost missed it. "I don't know what Collin and Brady were goin on about, but you look…you look nice."

I could feel myself warming as his dark eyes met my own.

"Thanks."

Apparently that was the only response I could manage today. What the hell happened to sexy, adult Claire?

"I mean," I quickly added on, hoping to take control of the situation for once. "Riley bought me the dress and she has really good taste, y'know?"

Quil nodded and his eyes flicked downward again. "Yea. She does."

I didn't get a chance to reply because a second later Emily was at the front door calling me to come join everyone.

"I'm coming!" I shouted back before sharing another quick look with Quil who was still watching me. He shrugged slightly and gestured toward the house.

"Let's go birthday girl. They're all waiting."

_Let 'em wait!_

My hesitation must have been evident because Quil began to gently pull on one of my wrists to get me moving. The contact made me want to purr like a happy little kitten.

"Are you getting nervous Claire-bear?" he teased and I shook my head in denial.

_The only thing that makes me nervous is YOU._

"I just know Collin and Brady are gonna go on about the dress thing once I'm in there." The excuse sounded believable enough and was better than admitting I didn't want to go inside because I liked being alone with him.

"Oh." Quil paused to consider my statement. "Well that's stupid."

"Hey…" I began defensively.

"No, I mean _they're_ stupid. You know they're kidding though, right?" I rolled my eyes to signal that yes I did in fact realize that Collin and Brady were not serious. Hell, they were hardly EVER serious.

"C'mon, I won't let them bother you even though you seem to be able to handle yourself pretty well." Quil grinned down at me and I couldn't help but mirror his expression. He used his grip on my wrist to begin tugging me in the direction of the porch.

"Those assholes just don't know how to act when they see a girl looking gor—" He paused, seeming to catch himself. "Looking _dressed up_."

I regarded him curiously. "Yea guess so."

We reached the door and Quil finally released my wrist to grip the handle.

_That didn't last nearly long enough. Sigh._

My entrance was quite dramatic, with much of the pack yelling 'Happy Birthday Claire' out of sync while bumping into each other to lavish me with hugs and dreaded hair-ruffling. I lost sight of Quil when Paul and Jared crowded me, but I knew I wouldn't be getting much alone time with him here anyway.

"Come eat everyone!" Emily called from the kitchen and I followed the mob outside where a few tables were set up with what could only be described as a feast. I noticed Collin already sneaking a roll from the large basket at the end of the table while Brady was seated next to my friend Irina, trying to seem cool and non-interested while checking out her boobs every five seconds. Sadly enough, she was staring back at him like he was the most captivating thing she had ever seen in her life.

_God, really? _

"Claire, look who came for your birthday!" I turned in the direction of what sounded like Jacob's voice and watched him emerge from around the side of the house hand-in-hand with perhaps the most beautiful woman I had ever seen.

_Wait…is that…_

"Happy birthday Claire!" The woman exclaimed, breaking free of Jacob to run toward me. I couldn't help but be fascinated by how smoothly she moved and the way her bronze curls bounced with each step. My purple dress suddenly seemed rather inadequate.

"I'm Renesmee Cullen in case you don't remember," she chimed in a light, beautiful voice before pulling me into a hug. "Just call me Nessie though! We used to play together when we were younger."

"Of course I remember! I can't believe you're here!" I responded once I had finally gained my bearings again. It had been a while, but Nessie seemed to be just as friendly and genuine as she had always been. Jacob was beaming at us from behind her despite the fact that he appeared to want to pull her back into his arms as soon as possible.

"Jake was worried about me traveling alone…" Nessie began, throwing an exasperated glance back at him that wasn't convincing in the slightest. "But I haven't been back to La Push in so long and Quil really wanted everything to be special for your birthday, so here I am!"

_Quil got her to come? For ME?_

I glanced around hoping to see Quil standing close by like everyone else, but I didn't spot him in the crowd.

"And Leah wanted to be here too," Emily spoke up, coming to stand next to me. "But she really has her hands full with the new job in Oregon. She said she would be down to see you soon though."

I nodded, still a bit overwhelmed by Nessie's sudden appearance, but already feeling happy and loved by my big, strange family. Quil had asked if I wanted a bunch of friends from school to come, but honestly Irina was the only non-pack person that I cared about being around for my birthday. I was kind of lame like that I suppose.

"Look out!"

Suddenly the back door banged open and Quil and Embry shuffled through, carrying something on a large tray. It took me all of two seconds to realize that it was a giant cake with yellow icing and what I assumed to be eighteen multi-colored candles lit on top.

"Quil! Embry! The cake was supposed to wait until _after_ dinner!" My Aunt Emily berated in an exasperated voice that did nothing to deter them from bringing the tray right in front of me. From the closer vantage point I could see that 'HAPPY EIGHTEENTH BIRTHDAY CLAIRE!' had been written across the top in bright blue icing.

_Yesss._

"I know, but Quil just couldn't wait to give it to her," Embry responded, earning a swift look from Quil, obviously telling him to be quiet.

"You're okay getting your cake now, right Claire?" Quil questioned with an unsure edge to his voice. I looked up at him as a huge smile overtook my face.

"Cake is _always_ okay."

I could hear Emily's sigh from behind me, but all I could focus on was Quil and the delicious-looking cake he held right under my nose. Possibly the best combination ever.

_Yum yum yum!_

"Well fine then. Let's do the song for Claire," Emily instructed as everyone quickly gathered around me. "Someone better have the camera ready though!"

"Got it!" I heard Riley shout from somewhere to my right though I made no effort to look at her. Quil's face was so much more interesting. Someone began counting out 1,2,3 and then a loud, obnoxious chorus of Happy Birthday began.

_Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to youuu…_

Quil was staring at me over the flickering candles, his mouth singing the words quietly as I watched in an almost daze-like state.

_Happy birthday dear Claire…_

He noticed me staring and his lip quirked up one side into a charming half-smile that made me want to forget the cake and eat him up instead.

_Happy birthday to you!_

The song finished with much cheering and whistling from the guys and I finally tore my eyes away from Quil to look around the circle gratefully.

"C'mon blow the candles out Claire!"

"Yea make a wish!"

I peered down at the cake for a moment and then gave a fleeting glance toward Quil before I blew them out. It wasn't hard to decide what to wish for.

_Please let Quil fall in love with me._

More cheering rang out across the yard and the cake was quickly taken out of the guys' hands to be cut up on the table.

"So you like the cake?" Embry asked, coming over to scoop me up into a hug. From over his shoulder I could see Quil watching us and I caught his eye.

"Everything is perfect. Thanks guys."

Quil obviously realized that I was thanking him as well because he was smiling proudly as Embry set me down. I was hopeful that he might hug me too, but I never got to find out because Seth fricken Clearwater stepped in between us.

_That boy is always killin my mojo!_

"Are you excited to stay up all night Claire?" He grinned at me while I'm sure I stared at him with a clueless expression. No one had said _anything_ about an all-nighter!

"Um say what?"

Seth glanced back at Quil questioningly. "Quil didn't tell you?" I shook my head no. "You know how you always wanted to stay up all night with the pack? Well we're gonna hang out here for the night for your birthday!"

I let out a little squeal as I imagined the possibility of a big pack sleepover party. Quil had obviously remembered from our photo album sessions that being included in the pack's all-nighters used to be a dream of mine. It had only been mentioned in passing as I showed him pictures from my fourteenth birthday down at the beach, but he had apparently considered that small detail important.

_He is just so perfect._

"Quillll." I couldn't help but whine his name appreciatively as I realized how much effort he had put into making my birthday fun and exciting for me. "You're seriously the best."

Quil actually looked a little embarrassed, reaching a hand up to scratch at the back of his neck and smiling sheepishly in my direction. "It's not that big of a deal really—"

Ignoring how lame it probably looked, I brushed past Seth and Embry to finally hug Quil like I wanted. His body was warm and solid against mine and I sighed when he wrapped his arms around me to return the embrace.

"It's awesome Quil," I breathed happily, hoping he would understand how much all of this meant to me. Far too quickly we broke away from each other and I tried to disregard the stares that we seemed to have attracted from the rest of the pack.

_Nosey much?_

Quil noticed the attention as well and cleared his throat. "Let's eat?"

And eat we did.

The rest of the evening progressed mostly how I expected. Tons of eating, multiple comments on how 'girly' I looked in a dress, weird gifts from the guys—like who the hell actually uses one of those 'Bump-it' hair accessories to make a stupid hump in their hair? THANKS COLLIN—and lots of games and rough-housing.

By 3 am or so however, everyone started to lose steam. We had put in a movie to watch and most of the guys were dropping like flies, falling asleep on the floor, couches, and chairs. So much for an all-night party!

I fought my own tiredness, determined to stay up the entire night for my birthday like I had always been set on doing. As I sat on the floor in between Riley and Irina who were both completely out, I glanced around wondering if anyone was even awake anymore.

_Are Collin and Brady spooning each other? WTF?_

I stifled my laughter and made a mental note to bring up their weird sleeping position for future teasing opportunities and continued my sweep of the room. Jake and Nessie were bundled together in a big, comfy chair, Seth was stretched out on the love seat snoring softly, and I could make out the shapes of other bodies also strewn about the floor.

_Why is everyone so fucking sleepy?_

I turned around to check the couch where I knew Quil and Embry had been seated to watch the movie. I noticed Embry first, hanging halfway off of the cushions, obviously zonked out and I shifted my eyes over to see if Quil was doing the same.

_He's awake! _

Quil was sitting up holding his phone in both hands and the way his fingers were moving quickly over the device suggested he was texting someone.

"Quil!" I whispered causing his head to snap up in attention and turn toward the sound. Once he saw me, he grinned in a cute, almost boyish way that reminded me of our best buddy times from the past.

"You're awake?" he whispered back, taking a quick look around the room at everyone else sleeping.

"Duh," I mumbled sarcastically. "It's supposed to be an _all-night_ party, remember?"

Quil nodded before his face lit up with a conspiratorial grin. "That's true. We need to do this birthday right."

I could feel the excitement begin to bubble up somewhere in my throat as Quil lithely lifted himself off of the couch and extended a hand down to me. "C'mon, I have an idea."

"What is it?" I spoke a little too loudly and Quil put a finger to his lips in mock sternness.

"Just follow me."

I took his hand, allowing him to help me navigate over Irina's sleeping form and the other bodies that lay like landmines ready to go off the moment they were stepped on. We both almost lost our shit when Brady started sleep-talking about 'catching that damn leech', but somehow managed to make it to the door without waking anyone up.

_Take that bitches!_

Stifling laughter, Quil and I quietly slipped outside where he directed me toward his parked truck.

"Hurry, get in before Brady runs after us!"

I started giggling so badly that I'm pretty sure anyone with halfway decent hearing could have heard me, let alone a pack of wolves with mad auditory skills, but I just couldn't stop. Sneaking out with my favorite person in the world was kind of making me giddy.

"Go, go, go!" I exclaimed once we were safely inside the truck and Quil complied, pulling away from the dark house while I watched the front door nervously. No one ran out after us though.

"So _now _can you tell me where we're going?"

Quil laughed, a deep, throaty sound. "So impatient. Just wait and you'll see!"

I clutched the fabric of my dress as we cruised down the tree-lined road illuminated by the moonlight from above. Soon we were turning down a familiar lane and the bubble of anticipation in my throat swelled.

"The beach?" I asked Quil when we had stopped near the sandy expanse.

"It's probably the most exciting thing we have around here."

I tried my best to raise one eyebrow, but I had always sucked at that and ended up just scrunching my forehead weirdly. My struggle did make Quil laugh though so I guess it wasn't all bad?

"Don't hurt yourself Claire."

I stuck my tongue out at him before hopping out of the truck and taking off running down the beach until I had reached the water. I shrieked when the ice cold surf ran over my toes prompting me to take a few steps back and straight into Quil's body.

_Damn he made it over here quick!_

Quil chuckled and steadied me with large hands on my upper arms. "A little too cold for you?"

I stepped away so I could see his face. "Just a bit…why? Fancy a swim?"

Quil raised an eyebrow in the very manner I had tried and failed to emulate a minute ago. "Are you trying to get me to swim naked again?"

_Oh hell._

My cheeks flamed embarrassingly in response to his suggestive words and I broke eye contact to look down at the sand. "Uh you wish."

_Actually __**I**__ wish. I wish very, very much._

I chuckled in an awkward sort of way and started walking down the beach to hopefully get my mind out of the gutter that Quil had dragged it into. The wind was becoming particularly chilly close to the water and I suddenly wished I had thought to bring along a sweater.

"So how does it feel being eighteen now?" Quil muttered, falling easily into step beside me. I shrugged, not really knowing how to respond to that. Sure, I was eighteen as of today, but nothing seemed to have changed.

"It's cool I guess, but it's not like I really feel that much older."

"Yea I know how that is. You're talking to a guy who hasn't aged in over a decade." Quil ended his statement with a short, self-deprecating laugh and I paused to examine his expression in the dim light.

"You're not unhappy right?" I asked him sincerely after a moment's consideration. He looked taken aback by my tone, tilting his head a little to regard me.

"Oh…well no. I'm good. I didn't mean to sound whiny or anything."

"You weren't whiny," I assured him. "I just know being a part of the pack isn't always easy all the time so…"

I trailed off, feeling self-conscious that I had started to pry too much into his thoughts. Quil looked pretty impassive for the most part though and just shrugged.

"I don't know. I guess I can't really imagine living any other way."

I nodded, maintaining eye contact with him. "I um appreciate what you do. You know that right? I mean I know I joke and stuff, but you're like my…my best friend and you just do so much. Like this birthday thing for instance! You were just...great. I don't even…"

I knew I was rambling on and on, but I literally felt incapable of conveying the depth of my feelings with any eloquence. My hands were trembling now as the brisk night air chilled my exposed arms and legs and Quil eyed me with a concerned gaze.

"You're shivering Claire."

"Oh I'm alright," I mumbled, lifting a hand to brush away a stray hair from my face. Quil caught my hand in his before it could reach its destination however, and stared at it seriously.

"No you're not. Your hand is like a damn ice cube."

I attempted to pull out of his hold, but he wouldn't release me. "C'mon, let's get back to the car before you freeze to death. I should've brought you a sweatshirt or something."

Another gust of wind blew by us causing me to convulse violently from the frigid temperature and I decided that Quil was right. I would rather not catch pneumonia out here even if it was my birthday.

_Thanks a lot dumb La Push weather._

Quil hurried us back to his truck where he immediately blasted the heater on and forced my hands in front of the small vents. I tried to control my shivering, but my body seemed to be working against me, trembling even as I reassured Quil I was fine.

"Come here," he muttered, pulling me closer to him by my upper arms, which he ran his hands up and down repeatedly. Unfortunately the contact caused me to shiver again, albeit for an entirely different reason.

Quil must have misread my response though and yanked me even closer into a loose embrace. "God Claire you're freezing."

I shook my head, rubbing my nose against his chest. "I'm-I'm good."

"Give me your hands," Quil commanded and I shifted back a little to bring them forward. Shit, if he wanted to keep touching me who was I to deny him?

I watched, completely mesmerized as Quil reached down to grasp my hands before he lowered his head to blow warm air onto my fingers. It was more intimate than it really should have been especially when my thumb grazed his soft bottom lip. We both stiffened.

_Woah._

Suddenly Quil surprised me by pressing a light kiss onto my palm so quickly that I almost doubted it happened at all. But what else would explain the white hot jolt that coursed through my body?

Quil lifted his head up, his eyes seeming to darken as they met mine. "Is that any better?"

I could only nod because my voice seemed to be stuck somewhere down past my stomach and it wasn't coming back anytime soon.

"You still…seem _cold_ though," Quil murmured huskily right before he pulled me back into an embrace that was even tighter this time. I was completely compliant in his arms as he began running his hands down my arms, my sides, and then ghosting over the top of my thighs lightly.

_Dear god please don't let this be a dream._

I'm not sure if I was still breathing by the time Quil's nose rubbed against my cheek and then down to my jaw where his warm lips brushed once for a brief moment. I shuddered violently, willing myself not to pass out as one of my most sought after Quil fantasies came to life right before my eyes.

"Quil," I sighed his name as he placed another soft kiss against my cheek. Quil must have heard me because he drew back a fraction, permitting me a view of his half-lidded eyes and slightly parted lips that released his breath in small, barely audible pants.

_Don't wake up Claire. Don't wake up!_

We stared at each other as the air around us grew thicker and thicker with a tension that I desperately wanted to diffuse. And then it happened. Maybe it was me that moved first or perhaps it was Quil—I'm not really sure—but somehow our lips managed to connect across the short distance and suddenly we were full on kissing.

Quil and I were _kissing_. LEGIT KISSING.

I stifled a groan as his lips moved over mine in a tantalizingly soft way that left me wanting more. Raising my hands that had fisted in his shirt, I looped them around his neck, hoping he would get the hint and deepen the kiss. Thankfully Quil complied.

His fingers clenched into my hips and I felt myself move forward so that I was now straddling his lap. The change in position made my stomach clench in excitement and desire while my pulse sped even further out of control.

"Mmm.."

This time I couldn't control the moan that escaped me when Quil tugged my bottom lip lightly in between his own. I felt a pang of embarrassment, but only for a second because his tongue was now prodding against the seam of lips, seeking entrance that I readily gave.

_Holy Canoli!_

If I thought the kiss was intense before, it was nothing compared to the feeling of my tongue moving in sweet harmony with his. Fuck, it was amazing!

Quil was practically devouring me and honestly I felt like I was going to pass out from lack of oxygen, but I couldn't seem to make myself break the contact. Quil must have sensed my need for air though because a moment later he pulled his lips away from mine.

_Nooo come back!_

I sucked in a long, ragged breath. "Um…I…"

Words failed me. Maybe Quil had stolen my ability to speak by shoving his tongue in my mouth? I noticed triumphantly that Quil was panting just as badly as I was. He stared at me, seemingly shocked by what had happened.

"Quil?" I whispered, realizing that I was still draped over his body in a very, very intimate way.

"Oh my god," he muttered hoarsely while closing his eyes and leaning back into the seat.

_That better be a __**good**__ 'oh my god'! _

"Claire," Quil breathed, opening his eyes again to look at me. "Shit, I…"

I waited with bated breath, cataloging his expression as it went from shocked to worried. My thoughts suddenly flashed back to the day I had tried to kiss Quil and he had freaked out. This was not fucking good at all.

Quil looked down at me apologetically. "Claire I shouldn't have…god I'm sorry."

_DAMMIT NOT AGAIN!_

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Phew! Hope you survived this beast chapter. Soooo...any thoughts? Love you guys! **_  
><em>

**And if you do read the song lyrics at the beginning, YES I did in fact use an inappropriate Rihanna song. I just couldn't help myself ;) Ahaha. Cake cake cake cake cake...  
><strong>


	18. Drive My Soul

**Chapter 18**

_When you're gone  
>Will I lose control?<br>You're the only road I know  
>You show me where to go<br>Who will drive my soul?_

-Drive My Soul by Lights

"Claire I shouldn't have…god I'm sorry."

_Really? REALLY? _

This could not be happening to me. Again. Loosening my arms from around Quil's neck, I brought my hands down to my lap where they clenched at the fabric of my dress nervously.

"Why are you sorry?" I mumbled, hoping to god that there was some way I was misunderstanding this.

"Because I know better," Quil responded like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "I shouldn't be taking advantage of you like this."

I bristled with anger. "Taking _advantage_?"

He gave a curt nod that signaled he obviously believed that bullshit. Didn't he notice how I had most _willingly_ kissed and groped him back? The boy was crazy and needed to be set straight.

"Quil you didn't take advantage of _anything_—" I began earnestly, but was stopped by Quil interrupting me mid-sentence.

"No it's my fault Claire. I'm _older_ and you're not even…" He trailed off with a self-deprecating groan before running a hand through his short hair. "I mean you're like practically family right? And I'm just totally out of line."

_You have got to be fucking kidding me._

I was suddenly very aware of the fact that I was still straddling his lap like a hussy and quickly moved to disentangle myself from the intimate position. My dress had ridden up during our make-out session, making my movements even more embarrassing as I scooted along the bench seat away from Quil.

"Quil you're getting this all wrong," I muttered, glancing at him out of the corner of my eye. He was staring intensely at his hands clenched on each knee and I shifted my body so that I could view him better.

"Hey," I began softly while moving one of my hands toward his. "Don't be upset."

The moment my fingers brushed his knuckles however, Quil flinched away from me violently. "Sorry," he mumbled, barely looking at me. "I'm just messed up right now Claire."

_Messed up?_

Quil sighed and finally brought his eyes up to meet mine. "I mean, here you are trying to get your best friend back any way you can and I can't even do _that_ for you."

I could feel my mouth gaping open in surprise. He was literally making no sense. "That's not true Quil! You've been doing the best you can with all this crazy shit that happened to you! And who put together this birthday for me? That was _you_, Quil."

Quil shook his head, obviously disregarding my impassioned speech. "You just keep making excuses for me because of the injury. You're always trying to help me out…and how do I repay you?"

"I-I-I..." I began sputtering, too shocked to form a coherent sentence. Quil was breathing heavily and looking utterly pained as he stared out the windshield into the darkness. I could feel the intimacy we had shared earlier slipping away bit by bit.

"Claire," Quil muttered in a more controlled voice. "I know you're set on helping me recover, but maybe…maybe I'm not that person anymore."

"Wait what are you talking about?" I rasped, finally finding my voice.

"I just mean that all of _this,_" He gestured back and forth between us. "Proves that I'm an asshole. And I know you're too invested in getting me back as your friend to stop me when I do something crazy like…kiss you."

_No. Stop please stop._

But Quil didn't stop and instead continued dealing me another painful blow. "Just because I'm confused about everything with my memory loss doesn't give me a free pass to just try stuff like that out on you."

I could feel my hands starting to shake as I digested this new information. So kissing me was some stupid, fucking _experiment_ to see if his memory would come back? Embarrassment and anger overwhelmed me to the point where I didn't even think I could speak.

Quil was looking at me apologetically, like I was some poor little girl he had upset. "I'm supposed to be your _friend_ and I forgot about that for a little while. I promise it won't happen again Claire."

He gave a small, hopeful smile that I suppose was intended to be a reconciliatory gesture, but all it did was piss me off further. Quil had just succeeded in dismissing the whole incident as a big mistake on his part and now expected me to accept his lameass apology and move on.

_Screw that._

"I'm not helpless Quil, okay? I was participating too in case you didn't notice," I spat bitterly, watching as his smile disappeared.

"I know," Quil mumbled, looking uncomfortable. "I bet it's really confusing for you too."

The only thing _confusing_ me at the moment was Quil's total rejection of our kiss. It hurt like hell to admit it, but obviously kissing me was some kind of test for him and I had failed. I turned away from Quil's searching eyes so that he wouldn't see how emotional I was becoming.

"Can you just t-take me back to the house now?" I asked quietly, hoping he hadn't noticed how fragile my voice sounded.

"Sure."

Quil started up the engine and the truck rumbled down the road. I pressed myself against the passenger side door while I stared intently out the window watching the trees whip by. There was no way I could even look at Quil after what had transpired.

The minute we stopped in front of Sam and Emily's I hopped out and rushed across the lawn. It was futile however, seeing as Quil moved twice as fast as I did.

"Claire, you're not mad are you?" He whispered from beside me.

"No, why would I be?" I questioned in an acidic tone. Quil actually looked surprised. "You made it very clear that it was a mistake. So just forget about it."

I brushed past him, but he rushed up ahead of me. "Hey hey wait. What can I do to make it right?"

_Tell me you kissed me because you wanted to. Because you're attracted to me. Not because you thought it would jog your memory._

I couldn't actually say that though. "Just forget it," I repeated instead.

"We're still friends right?"

I paused, staring at Quil's face which looked oddly troubled. Why did he even care about being friends with me?

"Yea. Sure," I mumbled before side-stepping him again to make a beeline for the house. If he kept badgering me about this I was probably going to lose it and do something crazy like tell him I was in love with him or that I was his imprint.

I stepped inside the living room as quietly as possible before crawling back into my spot between Riley and Irina who were thankfully still sleeping soundly. A quick glance around the room informed me that the rest of the guys seemed to be asleep as well.

The door shut softly and I buried my face into a pillow as Quil walked through the living room back to his spot on the couch. I couldn't look at him, let alone have to talk to him again. He didn't want me and now I knew it for sure.

_Guess birthday dreams don't come true then, eh? _

I don't think I actually slept a wink the entire night, I was so caught up in my thoughts, and when morning light finally came I was sure I looked like an ugly panda face with dark circles under my eyes. A quick trip to the bathroom confirmed this assumption.

_Yep, look like hell. Awesome._

I ate breakfast as quickly as possible, avoiding any sort of interaction with Quil who seemed to be trying to make eye contact with me every five seconds.

"So do you think Irina would go out with me?" Brady whispered conspiratorially over his plate of French toast. I shrugged, not feeling inclined to meddle in someone else's romantic pursuits when mine were clearly doomed.

I felt a sharp poke against my shoulder and looked over to find Collin staring at me. "Why do _you_ look so pissed off?"

_Maybe you should ask Mr. Hit it and Quit it?_

"I'm not. I'm just tired."

Collin's eyes squinted as he regarded me skeptically. "Uh-huh."

I bit into a chunk of French toast that felt weirdly tasteless within my mouth. Maybe slathering it with more syrup would help? Or maybe everything just sucked ass today.

"Hey Brady can you pass the syrup?" I mumbled while stretching my hand out to him over the table. Before Brady could respond however, a different hand was reaching over to place the bottle of sugary liquid within my grasp.

"I've got it Claire," Quil muttered softly as our fingertips brushed together. The touch was casual, but enough to send my poor, broken heart into a fit of hysteria. My hand recoiled away from his, thankfully managing to bring the syrup along with it.

"Thanks," I breathed in a tone barely above a whisper. I could feel Quil's eyes on me and almost involuntarily I allowed myself to meet his penetrating gaze.

_Dammit._

Quil's deep brown eyes were probing mine, searching earnestly for something I was apparently ignorant of. I had no idea what he was looking for, but I was pretty sure he would notice the IMPENDING BREAKDOWN sign flashing across my forehead in bright, red letters if I let him look at me long enough.

_Calm yourself psycho!_

I allowed my tired eyes to shut close, hoping Quil would get the hint and stop this dumb staring contest before I voluntarily lodged French toast inside my windpipe.

"Claire, want to head home?"

Riley's familiar voice was such a welcome distraction that I immediately perked up at her offering. I needed to get the heck out of this awkward situation as soon as possible.

"Sure," I practically panted, struggling to contain my relief. "Let's go."

I threw out some hasty 'thank yous' and 'goodbyes' to the rest of the family, but didn't even spare a glance at Quil. He probably didn't want to be around me anyway.

"Did you have a good time C-Bear?" Riley asked casually after we hit the road. I turned to face the window so she wouldn't see the tears that had started to well up in my eyes.

"Yep," I lied. Usually I told Riley everything, but my rejection was too embarrassing to share at this point. She seemed distracted enough by whatever she was thinking about though and only voiced her agreement that the party was a success.

"So Quil seemed to enjoy being around you."

I glanced over at Riley's smirking face, trying not to give anything away in my expression. "You think so?"

Riley sighed heavily and whipped the gearshift into park as we pulled up in front of our house. "Uh definitely. Everyone can tell he likes you."

"Well I don't know…" I mumbled, unbuckling my seatbelt so that I could make a hasty exit. Riley looked exasperated as she followed closely behind me up the porch.

"Seriously Claire? It's so obvious. I mean he like planned a party for you, got everyone you care about to come and then was so excited to give you cake that he brought it out before the food was even ready!" She stared at me with a grin. "Obviously he gets you. Desserts are like the key to your heart after all."

I shook my head. "He isn't into me like that Ry. I _know_ he's not."

Riley's gaze suddenly turned inquisitive and I knew she was picking up on my underlying emotion. "Wait…what happened Claire?"

"It's nothing," I sniffled pitifully, hoping she would drop it, but knowing there was no chance in hell she would. "Quil just doesn't…he doesn't…want me."

"Ok spill it. _Now_."

There was no point trying to resist when she used _that_ tone, so I caved. I told her how Quil and I had snuck out, how we'd kissed, and then how Quil had decided everything was a mistake. Naturally it made me cry like a little bitch.

"Claire you need to tell him how you feel. Guys usually don't have a clue what's going on in a girl's crazy brain!" Riley advised after she'd called Quil a few choice words and we were piled together on the couch. She still seemed to be operating under the delusion that Quil actually liked me.

_How nice for her._

"But he'll just tell me to back the eff off!"

"Shut up. He will not."

"He basically told me I was an experiment to bring back his memory!" I yelled when she rolled her eyes at me.

"Well you won't know for sure unless you get out there and tell him the truth. So man up. And can we please focus on something way more important now…like the Spanish soap opera I've been watching this past week! I need to know if Bernardita keeps the baby or not!"

"Bernalita or whatever her name's baby is more important than your _baby sister?" _I pouted dramatically, knowing she was just trying to keep me from dwelling on Quil like a good big sis would.

"Yep," she chirped. "Pretty much. And you're gonna watch it with me so keep your mucho grande mouth shut and enjoy, k?"

I giggled at her butchered Spanish, but nodded my head anyway. "Whatever you say _amigo_."

Three hours and tons of dramatic soap opera revelations later, I totally knew I had to tell Quil how I felt! I mean, Bernardita had lied to Carlos about loving him and look what had happened? He'd been killed in that freak electrocution accident before he even knew about her feelings or their beautiful baby boy Diego! It was so damn tragic.

_I'll tell Quil tomorrow. SERIOUSLY._

I kept a steady mantra of that phrase going through my mind as I went to bed and unsurprisingly it was the first thing I thought of when I woke up the next morning. Well that and if I could get Riley to bring me home Taco Bell for dinner later. Apparently watching Spanish TV made me crave Gordita Supremes. Hopefully that wasn't like racist or anything.

_Focus! Quil needs to know that you want to be more than friends. _

I started to get ready for the day, planning to look as grown up and girlfriend-material as possible, but honestly I didn't really know what that entailed. After trying to use Riley's eyelash curler AKA eye stabbing device, I kind of just gave up on that whole thing.

_Jeans and t-shirt it is then._

Around lunch time I figured it would be safe to head over to Quil and Embry's to carry out my 'mission.' Since Riley had taken the car to get to work, I ended up walking the few miles, letting my warring feelings of anxiety and hope battle it out the entire way.

Part of me wanted to tell Quil _everything_: how I was his imprint, how I loved him more than anything else, how we were supposed to be together forever. But another part of me knew that I could completely freak him out and ruin any chance of being around him at all.

_But didn't that kind of get ruined when we made out though? _

My thoughts bouncing around erratically, I barely noticed when I finally did wander up to Quil's small home.

_Oh god. Moment of truth. _

I stared at the closed door and forced out a shaky exhale that I had been holding captive inside of my lungs. What the hell was I doing? Quil hadn't even texted me or _anything_ since we'd last seen each other. Suddenly standing outside for a while seemed like a much better option than going inside that house and facing him.

_C'mon Claire. You didn't walk all this way to chicken out now._

I took a few cautious steps until I shuffled my way up the porch steps, coming face to face with the faded door. Strangely enough, I could feel my body tensing up almost as if it was bracing itself for an impending impact.

_You can do this. _

I knocked and waited with baited breath and that odd protective stance my body had adopted. When Quil appeared, pulling the door open with a soft smile that quickly turned to surprise upon seeing me, I realized that maybe my body wasn't being so crazy after all. The impact it was expecting came harder than I could have imagined.

_Shit no. _

Behind Quil's form, I could make out someone sitting on the couch; a person with long, _feminine _legs and designer-looking boots that mocked my ratty Converse shoes.

"Oh...hi," Quil greeted in a cautious voice after staring at me for a few moments. "What's up?"

I realized I was probably gaping at him, so severe was my state of shock. "Um I just...wanted..."

"Is that Claire?" An overly cheery voice called from behind Quil, causing him to flinch. His dark eyes remained on me as he answered the mystery woman.

"Yea it's Claire."

It was probably my imagination, but the way he said my name had almost sounded _worried? _But why? I didn't understand him at all.

"Well this is a pleasant surprise!" The female voice exclaimed and Quil moved back just as Celeste appeared beside him in the doorway.

_HOLY TITS. It's HER._

Celeste's expression, while smiling, seemed to indicate that my presence was anything but _pleasant. _

"Hello," I rasped in a brittle voice. "Am I interrupting…a session?"

Celeste emitted a little chuckle that still irked me even in my shell-shocked state. "Oh no. This isn't an official visit or anything."

_Then what the hell are you doing here?_

I glanced up at Quil, hoping he would suddenly order her out of the house, but all he seemed to be capable of doing was watching me with a guarded expression.

"Um okay."

"Quil and I were just about to make some food if you wanted to join," Celeste offered with a flick of her shiny black hair. I stifled the urge to grab some of it and pull _hard_.

"Oh." I didn't know what else to say. I was literally at a complete loss for words and in danger of crumbling into a sobbing mess on the porch. That would be my second breakdown in two days yay!

"Do you want to come in?" Quil spoke finally, prompting me to look up into his torturously beautiful eyes. It was almost ridiculous how my love life was working out. I finally decided to tell Quil how I feel about him and he'd already moved on.

_WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK?_

I needed to leave immediately or Quil and Celeste were going to get a front row seat to Claire's Complete Ruination: The Musical! Only when I say _musical, _I mean the imaginary kind where in place of singing there's a shit-ton of ugly crying...y'know the kind with choking, coughing, and liberal amounts of snot.

"Um I-I have to go," I choked out, feeling tears stinging behind my eyes.

"Why?" Quil asked sharply, making a sudden movement toward me before looking down at Celeste and pausing in the doorway.

I desperately tried to keep my tone even as I answered his weirdly earnest tone. "I have some things to do…"

Quil looked unconvinced, but Celeste spoke up before he could question me further. "That's okay Claire. I hope we can see each other again soon though!"

Her patronizing tone was the last straw and I nodded, backing up until I stumbled onto the porch steps, almost losing my balance in the process. Quil was at my side in a millisecond.

"Claire, are you okay?"

I pulled away from his touch, keeping my eyes downcast so that he wouldn't see the tears. "I'm _fine._"

I forced myself down the rest of the steps, hoping Quil wouldn't follow after me, but I could feel the warmth of his body hovering closely behind mine.

"You don't have to leave," Quil's deep voice floated over my head. "I mean…where are you even going? I don't see a car here."

"I-I walked."

Quil moved in front of me, the surprise evident across his face. "You _walked_?"

"Yes," I breathed, attempting to brush past him. I knew Celeste had to be watching our entire exchange and it made it even more uncomfortable. Couldn't he just let me end this humiliation?

"I can drive you wherever you want to go Claire," Quil offered while using his girth to effectively block my path.

"That's not necessary."

"I don't mind. Not at all."

I shrugged hopelessly. "I like walking."

"But…" Quil began, looking at me almost pleadingly. "Why did you come over? Did you need to see…about something?"

_I think I've seen enough._

"No. I just thought I'd stop by. No reason in particular," I lied. Quil nodded, but kept his eyes trained on my face in a way that unnerved me. From behind I heard Celeste clear her throat, prompting Quil to glance back toward the house.

"I'll see you around Quil," I mumbled before making a hasty retreat across the yard. This time Quil didn't follow me.

_Stupid stupid stupid._

I wiped at my eyes with the back of my hand as I propelled myself forward along the side of the road. This was the ultimate rejection, the proof that I was the pathetic teenager in love while Celeste was the real woman waiting in the wings to steal the show.

I had just been too naïve to see the truth this whole time. Quil was finally getting to have what he wanted, not what his genes forced him into. It just meant that I was screwed because I was the stupid sucker who had gone and fallen in love with him.

_This is fair. He looked out for you all those years and now he gets to have his own happiness. Accept it._

But I couldn't accept it. Quil had always been the constant in my life through all the good and bad times, supporting me, making me laugh, telling me he would always be there. And now he had found someone else.

Shoving open the front door of my house, I made a beeline straight for my room where I threw myself down onto the welcoming softness of my bed. I had made it through Quil's injury and subsequent memory loss without breaking and had even survived the death of my parents those years back with Quil's help.

But _this_? I couldn't lose my parents _and _Quil. It was just too fucking much to handle.

Suddenly my phone started ringing from inside my pocket, interrupting my crazed thoughts. I half expected it to be Quil, but when I peeked at the Caller ID I was surprised to see Embry's name flashing across the screen.

_Why is he calling? _

I wanted to ignore it, but being a part of a supernatural wolf family made me paranoid that any call could be an emergency. My fingers reluctantly pressed the answer key.

"Hey Em," I greeted with as normal a voice as possible. It didn't sound like me though and I knew Embry would notice.

"Claire? Where are you?"

Embry sounded concerned and I clenched the phone wondering if something had happened. "Um home? Why?"

"Just making sure you got there alright," he exhaled, sounding relieved. "I heard that you walked over here and then just left?"

_He knew about my mortifying encounter with Quil too? How lovely._

"So you saw Celeste then?" I muttered, my voice catching a little on the last word. Embry sighed heavily from across the line.

"Yea she was...well _is _still here."

"So you can see why I left then?"

Embry made an exasperated noise. "Quil is such an asshole. How could he do that to you? I mean jesus, she's his fucking therapist isn't she?"

"Yea, but you've seen her Em, she's kinda gorgeous."

"If you're into uptight, prissy bitches I guess then yea, she's great," Embry deadpanned with his signature sarcasm and I almost laughed. Unfortunately I was still too raw from my encounter with Quil and Celeste to appreciate any humor.

"Well Quil obviously likes that so—"

"Claire no. Something is weird here..." Embry interrupted me. "Like did something happen with you guys? Because after your birthday party Quil acted really pissed off and then just disappeared for the rest of the day. He didn't come back until really late and now today he has Celeste over here. It's just really strange."

_Oh god did he disappear to go see **her**? Ughhh._

"I don't know Embry. Sounds like he's just...just dating Celeste." The words stung coming out of my mouth, my body wanted to deny any possibility that Quil could be interested in someone else.

"Maybe...but Claire, you're his imprint. He loves _you._"

It was the first time Embry had mentioned imprinting in a while and it was a painful reminder of all I had lost. "That doesn't matter anymore. He doesn't remember me. He doesn't remember...any of it."

"But it does matter because I think he feels it Claire. That's why he's acting weird and angry. He just doesn't know what's bothering him! If you would just _talk to him _about imprinting maybe—"

"No!" I admonished loudly, feeling panicked by Embry's suggestion. "I c-can't do that. I won't force him."

Embry groaned. "You're not forcing anything! Quil won't be happy without you."

_No, you're wrong. **I** won't be happy without **him.**_

"Nobody knows that for sure! He at least deserves a chance to find out what _he _wants! And if that's Celeste then...I'll...I'll..."

I trailed off, fighting back a weird pressure that was steadily rising in my throat. This was so freaking hard.

"Don't do this Claire," Embry pleaded softly.

"Just don't worry about me okay? I'm alright."

"What if _I _told him about the imprint? You wouldn't have to explain anything at all! In fact I'd _love_ to beat some fucking sense into that thick skull of his."

"Don't you dare Embry!" I shouted before he could continue with this line of thinking. "It's my place to tell him about it and my place only. No one else gets to, okay?"

Embry's voice was heavy with disappointment as he grudgingly agreed not to say anything to Quil. After a few words of encouragement, he bid me goodbye and I was left to dwell on the sensibility of my decision in solitude.

_So this is it then. My life without Quil. _

I rolled over, closing my eyes against the barrage of Quil-laden memories. The more recent ones were especially painful, as my body remembered the touch of his lips and the heat of his skin against my own. I couldn't block the sensations out. They were ingrained into me and I longed for them to return again.

_Fuck you imprinting. _

Quil had moved on, but I was stuck.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: First off, SO SORRY for this ridiculously long wait! Everything in my life got crazy busy all of a sudden and I just really didn't have the time. All the wonderful, amazing reviews definitely kept me motivated to get this chapter out though so thanks so so much :) I felt the love! Now, regarding this chapter, please don't like freak out okay? I know it's angsty. I know it kinda sucks. But it's here for a reason. Claire is still a teenage girl with dramatic teenage emotions (no offense to teens out there!) and honestly she's done pretty well so far with all the crappy stuff happening in her life. Plus you are only seeing things from Claire's POV, not Quil's so keep that in mind okay? And if you would like to share your take on it, I would be pumped to hear from you! :) MUCHO LOVE-O. **


	19. Dancing On My Own

**Chapter 19**

_I'm in the corner, watching you kiss her, ohh  
>I'm right over here, why can't you see me, ohh<br>I'm giving it my all, but I'm not the girl you're taking home, ooo  
>I keep dancing on my own<br>_

-Dancing On My Own by Robyn

I curled up in a heap of blankets on my bed, listening to the rain falling outside my window. It seemed very appropriate for the despondent mood I was in.

_God when did I become so lame?_

My phone chimed from underneath my blanket pile and I struggled through the layers to find it.

"It's Quil," I mumbled out loud when I noticed that the text message was from none other than my likely ex-best friend. I clicked 'Open' and my stomach flip-flopped nervously.

_Claire, can we talk? -Quil_

For some reason I deleted the short text immediately and hid my head underneath the blankets. I couldn't face him right now even over the phone.

_I suck._

Ten minutes later the phone chimed again.

_Did you get my text? Let me know._

I sighed and burrowed even further into my cuddly nest. Couldn't Quil just leave me alone? Apparently not, because two more texts followed in quick succession.

_Are you mad at me? _

What do you think asshole?

_Please answer Claire. I'm sorry._

I clenched the phone in my hand, staring at his words. Did he even know what he was sorry for? I hit delete with a self-satisfied 'humph.' Five minutes later, the phone started to ring.

_Shit. He's serious about this!_

I was tempted to answer and do something stupid like tell him off for hanging out with Celeste otherwise known as the Memory TheraBITCH. Get it? Like memory thera_pist_, but a skankity bitch. After a few giggles, I decided I should probably keep the nicknames to myself and proceeded to turn my phone off.

_Stop blowin up my phone loser._

I ignored the annoying voice in my head that insisted that Quil could never be a _loser_ and that I was nuts for ignoring him when he clearly wanted to talk to me and turned on my nap playlist instead. Letting the mellow jams comfort my downtrodden soul, I sunk into the bed and let sleep take over.

And thus began the period of my life I like to call "The Time Without Quil" or TTWQ for short.

_TTWQ Day One_: Attended school in zombie-like state, ignoring strange looks from other students. Trip to the bathroom revealed I still had Pop-Tart residue in my hair from breakfast. Checked to see if coast was clear and finished off the crumbs. Missed Calls from Quil: 3

_TTWQ Day Two: _Ate an entire tub of frosting on a dare. From myself. OH MY GOD WHAT IS IN THAT STUFF I AM LITERALLY CONVULSING. Missed Calls from Quil: 4

_TTWQ Day Three: _Argued with Riley about answering Quil's phone calls. Apparently the pack is worried I'm catatonic, but I'm not. I'm just super chill. Missed Calls from Quil: IDK cuz I'm that fucking chill.

_TTWQ Day Four: _ Wrote a rap today. May have found life's calling?

QUIL'S FACE _  
><em>By: Young Claire

_Uh yeah check it  
>Quil's face<br>Gettin all up in my brain space  
>Need to find a way to just fucking erase<br>Quil's face  
>Feels like I'm in a rigged footrace<br>Cuz I'm trippin and I can't replace  
>Quil's face<br>Young Claire out._

Missed Calls from Quil: fuck dat shit man.

_TTWQ Day Five_: Went to school. Came home. May try to set Guiness World Record for longest nap ever. LET'S DO THIS. Missed Calls from Quil: zzzzzzzzzz

"Claire! Wake up! _Now!_"

I felt the harsh sting of a pillow hitting me on the cheek and I reached up an arm to bat it away. "Whaa?" I groaned, lifting my head only a fraction off the bed.

"You need to get up. This is starting to be a problem."

My hair was wrapped around my face into a ratty mess, but I managed to peek through the strands enough to see Riley hovering over me.

"C'mon I'm just _resting_."

Riley snorted and yanked on my blanket. "Seriously no. This is an intervention. You haven't showered in like a week and your hair is starting to look like a hamster nest."

_Well that wasn't very nice._

"Okay I showered like a day ago!" I mumbled defensively even though she was kind of right about my hair.

"Whatever I don't care," Riley sighed before dragging me toward the edge of the bed by my arms. "I've let you mope about Quil long enough and you're not doing it anymore. You have a life outside of that overgrown terrier, okay? You have aspirations and goals!"

"Mehh I do?"

Riley nodded fiercely. "Yes and those goals do not include developing bed sores before you turn 20! So up and at 'em champ!"

It turns out that Riley was dead serious about this intervention stuff because somehow I was out of bed and in the shower in less than five minutes. The girl had serious skills.

_And these tangles are gonna need a heck of a lot more conditioner!_

After I was all clean and feeling markedly more refreshed than I had been in days, I made my way out of the bathroom, only to pause in the hallway when I heard the sound of feminine voices.

_Uhhh what?_

I shuffled toward the doorway of my bedroom and peeked inside. To my surprise, Riley and Irina were both there, taking turns raiding my closet. The two of them, I noticed, were dressed up like they were ready to hit the town for a night out.

_Oh crap._

"Claire!" Irina called when she finally spotted me creeping in the doorway. "Get in here; we need to get you ready to go!"

My eyes shifted between them, hoping for an explanation. "Uh where exactly are we going?"

"Clubbing in Port Angeles since you're 18 now! And Leah's going to meet us there! Isn't it great?" Riley chirped while throwing one of my shirts back into the closet with her nose wrinkled. I stared at her slackjawed as I digested this new information. I didn't know _how_ to club!

"God why do all of your clothes suck?" Irina huffed from her spot at the closet. "Forget this. Let's just get her into one of your outfits and call it good."

Riley nodded. "Yea probably easier since we don't have much time. We're supposed to go over and get Nessie before we leave."

"Nessie's coming too?" I mumbled, wondering how this escapade had been planned without me knowing.

_Well you have been sleeping A LOT._

"Yep! She's over at Quil and Embry's right now with Jake so we'll just swing by there on our way out."

I blinked twice at Riley's casual mention of stopping by Quil's house. "But I can't go over _there_."

Suddenly one of my old sweatshirts that Irina had been holding flew across the room, just barely missing my face.

"What the heck?" I cried, glaring over at her.

"Well don't say crap like that," she shot back with a smug look on her face. "You didn't even _tell_ _me_ Quil had a possible girlfriend even though I asked you about a hundred times this week what was bothering you. So you're going along with this whether you like it or not!"

_Woah. _

"Yea, but…"

"Nope. Tonight we're gonna have fun and you're not even allowed to think about Quil or that stupid whore!"

I snorted at her mean, but enjoyable Celeste description. "Well thanks I guess?"

Irina and Riley both grinned before coming over to pull me into an uncoordinated group hug. It was kinda lame, but still heartwarming considering how mentally destroyed I'd been the past week.

"Okay guys…I guess I can do this," I mumbled when the three of us had untangled ourselves. Riley looked thrilled as she grabbed my hand and began tugging me out of the room

"That's the spirit Claire! Now let's find some _real _going-out clothes okay?"

_Well, here goes nothing._

I wasn't sure how long it took, but it was starting to get dark out by the time Riley and Irina were satisfied with my clothes, hair, and overall 'show-Quil-what-he's-missin' look. What I _was_ sure about, was that I really didn't want to be paraded in front of Quil and possibly his new gal regardless of how dressed up I was.

"We're here!"

_Oh no. no. no._

I dug my freshly manicured nails into the plush fabric of the seat; a futile gesture of resistance. We had just arrived at Quil and Embry's and judging by the presence of Quil's truck, it seemed the dreaded wolf was home.

"C'mon Claire, you're doing this," Irina instructed while getting out of the backseat. I gave a curt nod, but otherwise made no move to exit the car.

_You have to do __this. Show Quil you're not pathetic like he thinks!_

Running my hands nervously over the dark fabric of my tight jeans, I tried to prepare myself for whatever might happen when I saw Quil. I stepped out of the car with careful, measured steps partly due to the fact that I was in a pair of high-heeled boots that I still didn't feel quite steady in and mostly because my legs were shaking with nervous anticipation.

"Claire just own it," Irina whispered as I came up beside her. She punctuated her statement with a confident thumbs-up while I tried my best to smile in return.

"You don't think the jeans are too tight do you?"

She gave me an obvious once-over with her eyes. "Um no, definitely not. Have you _seen_ your legs lately? They're like a freakin optical illusion or something!"

"That's a compliment, right?" I wondered, tugging on the hem of my deep blue blouse self-consciously. I really didn't think I had the…um…_assets_ to pull this sexy look off.

"Heck yea it's a compliment. I _meant_ your legs go on like forever."

I squinted down at said legs which to me, looked no different than normal. "Well, I guess I have always had a shorter torso…"

"Guys c'mon!" Riley yelled from her spot on the porch. "We don't have all night and Leah is already on her way."

_Guess there's no way out of this then._

Slowly, but surely I made my way up to the door, wincing as I remembered how I'd almost fallen down the steps to get away from Quil. If Riley noticed my frightened expression she said nothing of it, merely holding the door open for Irina and me to enter.

"Hey guys!" Irina chimed as we walked into the living room. A dissonant chorus of 'hellos' answered back, one of which stood out to me immediately.

_Quil. _

I could feel my legs freezing in place, refusing to move any closer to the man who had unwittingly caused me so much pain. Quil sat on the couch next to Embry, while Nessie sat between Jacob's legs on the floor appearing so comfortable and in love that it kind of hurt to look at them.

_Thank god Therabitch isn't here._

"Wow Claire!" Nessie suddenly exclaimed, jumping up so gracefully she looked like a dancer. "You look amazing!"

"Oh thanks," I mumbled, trying to look anywhere, but at Quil. I had already caught him staring at me and his expression looked dark, angry even. Did he not want me to come around anymore?

"So you gals are hittin the town tonight?" Jake chirped good-naturedly before coming to stand near his imprint. "Though I wasn't aware Port Angeles even had a nightclub?"

Riley walked over and placed her elbow on my shoulder despite the fact that we were basically the same height. "Well there's this rich, entrepreneur guy who moved there from California that decided it was time they got one. It's called _Twilight_ I think…"

Jacob barked out a laugh. "God that sounds terrible."

Renesmee glared at him, although her gaze lacked any real anger. "I think it sounds _great_! Plus apparently it's 18 and up, so Irina and Claire will be set to go."

I wondered about her age for a moment, but then figured that the Cullens had probably doctored up some fake ID for her years ago. Irina decided to use the mention of her name to join into conversation with Nessie, whom she had already grown to adore since meeting her at my birthday party. Soon Riley was involved and I watched as the three of them eagerly began discussing the details of the supposedly epic night that awaited us.

"Hey Claire-bear," a quiet voice spoke beside me and for a second I almost thought it was Quil. When I looked up however, it was Embry's cautious smile that greeted me.

"Hey Em."

He watched me closely, obviously searching for signs of distress. "You doing alright?"

"Yea," I confirmed, though I wasn't really sure I was. Embry nodded, but I saw his eyes flicker back to where Quil was still perched unmoving on the couch. He hadn't even spoken to me yet.

"You look really nice Claire," Embry suddenly complimented in a voice that was much louder than before. From my peripheral vision it seemed like Quil's hand moved a fraction of an inch against the couch cushion.

_Must have imagined it._

"Well thanks…those two forced me into it."

Embry chuckled before lifting his hand to touch the silver bracelet hanging loosely around my wrist. "And I've never seen you wear this before?"

I glanced up at him, trying to decipher his strange behavior. "Yea it was my mom's, but Riley thought it would look good on me."

"Well she was right," Embry agreed, letting his hand fall away from my own. I shot him a questioning stare, but he only grinned in response. From across the room I thought I heard a soft huff of annoyance.

_Strange._

"Thanks?" I mumbled weakly. Without warning, Embry suddenly pulled me toward him into an embrace that lifted me off the ground.

"Em...?"

"You're great Claire," he muttered from over my head. "So have fun tonight and be _careful_."

I stared at him in shock while he set me gently back to my feet. "I-I will."

Embry smiled once again before walking off in the direction of the kitchen, leaving me to wonder what the hell all of that had been about. I didn't have much time to think however, because Quil was standing in front of the couch regarding me with a turbulent gaze.

_Uh oh._

Our eyes locked as he moved toward me, not pausing until he had uncomfortably invaded my space. A quick glance around informed me that I wouldn't be getting any help from the girls; they had disappeared completely and Jake must have decided to join Embry in the kitchen. I was on my own.

"Why haven't you been answering any of my calls?" Quil finally grumbled, causing me to flinch. My nerves were seriously fried around this man. I took a deep breath, hoping to calm myself before answering.

"I don't know. I've been busy."

Quil pinned me with a disbelieving look. "Busy? With what?"

"Like school and friends and other…stuff…" I trailed off, trying to keep my composure under his intense questioning.

Quil looked really peeved. "You could have at least…I don't know, let me know or something."

_Ha. Like he actually cares!_

I placed my hands on my hips in a defiant stance as I thought of his time spent with Celeste. "I thought you were pretty busy yourself."

"What does that mean?" Quil asked in apparent confusion. I just shrugged, trying to seem as nonchalant as possible despite the fact that my heart felt like it was in a vice grip.

"Well it seems like you've been hanging out with Celeste a lot."

To his credit, Quil looked taken aback. "That doesn't mean I don't want to hang out with _you_," he explained, leaning in closer to me. "I thought we were supposed to be best friends."

_Oh man._

The sudden proximity was making me nervous and I fought the urge to back away. "I told you Quil…I've been _busy._"

He closed the space between us even more. Shit. "Well can you at least answer my calls next time? I was kind of worried…" He paused to brush one of my expertly styled strands of hair behind my ear. "…about you."

I sighed, letting my eyes flutter closed for just a moment. It was difficult to stay mad at him when he affected me so acutely.

"Well…" I whispered, cursing myself for sounding so fucking breathy. "I just…"

"Claire I _missed you_," Quil's deep baritone interrupted me before I could even finish whatever lame excuse I was planning on feeding him. My eyes snapped open in surprise, barely believing that it was still Quil talking in front of me.

"You did?"

Quil looked away from me and lifted a hand up to scratch at the back of his neck. "I guess I kind of got used to you being around all the time."

_Great. Well as long as Celeste is in the picture I can't be._

I wanted to shout at him that I missed him too, more than anything else, but my voice caught in my throat. He was just _used to me _being there. He didn't need me like I needed him.

"Huh," I muttered, finally taking a step away from him. "I understand, but like I said before, things have just gotten really, _really_ busy for me and I don't think I'll have the time to hang out as much."

Quil's face darkened once again while his eyes inexplicably flicked toward the kitchen where Embry and Jake were. "Is there…someone you're seeing?"

I practically choked at his question. He seriously thought I was dating someone?

"Seeing someone?" I repeated stupidly and he gave a terse nod. "I'm—"

"Claire!" Irina's excited voice suddenly interrupted us. "It's time to go! Club time babyyyy!"

Quil was still staring down at me expectantly, but I chose to ignore him in favor of joining the girls who were crowding around the doorway.

"Alright, I'm comin!" I exclaimed with much more eagerness than I really felt. To my satisfaction Quil seemed quite put out by my dismissal and I chuckled evilly inside even as my heart experienced a sharp pang.

_Stupid feelings. BACK UP OFF ME._

The four of us piled into Riley's car and with a few loud beeps of the horn, we were off. I tried my best not to think about Quil and eventually the giddy excitement of the other girls did end up rubbing off on me. By the time we made it Port Angeles I was actually feeling rather good about this whole ordeal. All I had to do was focus on having fun and trying to dance in these uncomfortable boots and I wouldn't even have a chance to think about dumb ex-soulmates!

"Oh my god, we're here!" Irina cried as we stopped in front of a seemingly plain building. Honestly, I was expecting something a little more…_exciting_ considering how much she'd gone on about it.

_Huh. So this is it?_

"Leah texted me she's already inside, so I'll just park and we'll meet her in there," Riley explained while pulling up to a metered parking spot. The four of us vacated the car a few moments later and soon we were up to the door where a muscled bouncer guy waited to check our IDs.

_Oh no._

And that's when I realized it. In my haste to get away from Quil I had somehow left my small clutch containing my license and money back at his house!

_How the hell am I going to fix this?_

"Um guys?" I whispered nervously as we waited behind another group. "I kinda don't have my ID."

Riley and Irina rounded on me with identical looks of incredulity. "You _what_?"

"Yea I must have left my purse at Quil and Embry's. I'm really sorry?"

Irina looked like she wanted to whip off one of her high heels and stab me with it, but luckily Nessie spoke up before she had a chance to.

"I'll figure something out Claire," she whispered confidently. "Just give me a second to talk to the bouncer."

Watching Nessie saunter up to the man with her signature glowing smile, I knew he was total goner. Dude didn't stand a chance against all that hybrid-vamp beauty. She easily launched into a convincing story about my lost ID, while I stood motionless, hoping my true legal age would shine through. I needn't have bothered though, because the man never tore his eyes away from Nessie even when she started gesturing toward me.

"Thanks so much!" Nessie chimed suddenly, beckoning the rest of us forward with her hand. "Let's go ladies."

_Shit it worked!_

Realizing Nessie had actually succeeded, Irina and Riley happily grabbed me from either side and we shuffled into the club excitedly. The first thing I noticed about the place was how incredibly loud the music beat around us, followed by the distinct smell of alcohol. It wasn't exactly pleasant.

"Hey there's Leah!"

Riley's eager voice shifted my attention away from the dance floor which was fairly packed with people to the bar off to the side. It was easy to spot our she-wolf friend, her tall form seated imposingly on one of the bar stools and a drink in her right hand. She looked gorgeous as always even as she scowled over at a man trying unsuccessfully to chat her up.

"Leah!" I called out before she had a chance to like punch him in the nose or something. She turned at the sound of her name and immediately broke into a wide grin upon seeing us.

"Finally!" She responded cheerfully, coming over to pull me into a tight hug. " I was about 30 seconds away from putting Casanova over there in his place."

We all giggled as the aforementioned man winked at Leah and she flipped him off in response. I seriously loved this woman.

"Whoa Claire when did you start looking all grown up?"

I shrugged under her scrutiny. "It's all their doing. These aren't even my clothes!"

Leah laughed. "Well I would've never guessed. You're a total babe."

Nessie seconded her statement before asking all about Leah's work and social life away from La Push. It had been a while since any of us had seen her, especially Nessie, so there was definitely a lot to catch up on.

"So I hear Quil's being a dick these days?" Leah asked me after Irina had dragged Riley and Nessie onto the dance floor. I had eagerly volunteered to stay behind and guard our non-alcoholic drinks, but now that the topic was back to Quil, dancing didn't seem so bad in comparison.

"Not exactly," I mumbled. "It's not like it's his fault or anything."

Leah nodded pensively and took another drink of whatever that clear liquid that most definitely wasn't water was. "True. But honestly Quil's always been kind of a moron, brain injuries notwithstanding."

I bristled without thought. "Hey that's not—"

"Kidding Claire," Leah interrupted with a chuckle and I immediately felt like an idiot. Was I still that obsessed with Quil that I needed to defend him from a harmless joke?

_So whipped._

"Hey, don't go over-thinking things. I know this has been a really terrible situation for you guys, but at least he's okay right?"

I nodded and she continued on. "And yea I'm probably not the best person to discuss imprinting stuff with, but the way I see it…if you and Quil really are supposed to work out, then it'll happen regardless."

"I don't think that's going to happen," I admitted in a quiet voice. "There's someone else he wants."

Leah's dark eyes shifted over to me, eyebrows raised. "Yea I've heard about the supposed lady friend and I'm not exactly convinced."

"But you didn't see them together!" I protested loudly, earning a few looks from the people next to us. Leah didn't seem to mind though.

"Well if that's the case then fuck em. It's not like you have to stay with Quil just because he imprinted on you," she began in a very matter of fact tone. "I mean, maybe you and Quil should be together or maybe not. At least now you have some time to figure it out without Quil going nuts if you even _look_ at another guy or god forbid try to leave La Push and do something."

_Well, when you put it that way…_

She took another long drink and sighed. "But I do know you're crazy about the pup for some reason so whatever you feel like doing is up to you. Just remember you're awesome, with or without an imprint."

"Aww thanks, I feel all warm inside," I cooed dramatically earning a painless slap on the arm. Leah wasn't exactly the most touchy-feely person and I knew it must have taken a lot just to say everything she'd told me. "But seriously Leah, thanks. It means a lot."

She flashed me a soft smile in return. "Okay enough of this. The least I can do is buy you a drink…I think you've earned it with all this Quil memory loss shit!"

I didn't see the point in arguing with that logic despite the fact that I was legally three years too young and soon enough I was sipping on a rum and coke.

_Yeeah buddy gettin my drink on._

Once the other girls came over, Leah decided to buy shots for her and Riley, assuring my big sis that her werewolf metabolism would burn off the alcohol quickly and she could serve as the designated driver instead.

"Hey Claire let's dance!" Irina called to me with a wiggle of her scantily-clad behind. I downed the rest of my drink, relishing in the slight burn it caused within my throat. Suddenly dancing didn't seem like too bad of an idea.

"I'm all over this!"

I wouldn't classify myself as much of a dancer, but for some reason the thumping bass and flashing lights really spoke to me. Plus the music was so loudly permeating my skull that I couldn't even make myself focus on Quil.

"Hey what's your name?" A deep male voice purred into my ear from behind me. A bit taken aback, I attempted to turn around smoothly, but my high-heeled boots ended up causing me to stumble instead. Two hands steadied me and I swear I didn't even notice that they weren't as warm as a certain pair of hands I knew. Didn't notice one fucking bit.

"Whoa, you okay?" The man asked me with a grin. He was actually kind of good-looking when you dismissed the whole 'he couldn't hold a candle to Quil' thing.

"Yep I'm good thanks," I assured him. He leaned in a little closer, his eyes lingering on my lips.

"I'm Mitch and you are…?"

_Should I really tell this dude my name? _

I struggled with the decision for a moment before it was taken completely out of my hands by Irina's big mouth.

"Claaaaire! This guy I just met bought the two of us shots! Isn't that awesome?"

Mitch let out an amused chuckle as we watched Irina pull on the arm of a young guy holding a tray of small shot glasses. He was at least six inches shorter than her and seemingly enthralled by her antics.

"Okay," I began, unsure about what to do. Taking shots from some random person probably wasn't a good idea. "I don't know about this…"

I felt Mitch's hand brush lightly across my arm. "Hey, I'll do one first and make sure it's alright if you want?"

Irina's alcohol provider did not look particularly pleased with this idea, but Irina was already voicing her agreement and handing Mitch a glass before anyone could object. I watched as Mitch threw back the shot with ease, flashing me a grin after he finished.

"It's good stuff Claire," he promised me. "You'll like it."

_Quil would not approve._

I grimaced, as thoughts of Quil reprimanding me for my dangerous behavior flashed through my mind. That's what he would have done before at least. Now he wouldn't even care.

I pushed the painful thoughts aside and reached for the tiny glass. "Hell why not?"

_Fuck that stuff burns!_

The liquid surprised me by leaving a fiery trail all the way down my throat and into my stomach where it settled into a ball of warmth. The feeling wasn't entirely unpleasant, but the taste was kind of god awful. And shit, Irina was handing me another one now.

"Bottoms up!"

I sighed, but grabbed it anyway. "Fine, but no more after this! Riley will kill us if she finds out."

The second shot didn't go down any easier than the first, but it did increase the ball of warmth in my stomach. In fact, the warm feeling seemed to be spreading throughout my body at an alarmingly fast rate. I dismissed it and continued to chat and drink with our new little group for a while until suddenly it hit me.

_I JUST WANT TO FUCKIN DANCE._

It was like the stars aligned or something because the perfect song came on, I was with exactly the right people, and I didn't even notice the pain caused by my stupid boots anymore. Quil Ateara could shove it for all I cared!

"Claire? Irina?"

I was singing so loudly with the lyrics of the current song that I barely heard the soft, feminine voice calling my name.

"Huhh?" I mumbled, pivoting to find the source of the voice.

_Whoa. The ground like moved._

Nessie was right up in my face, concern etched across her perfect features. "Are you guys doing okay? You seem a little…off."

"I'm completely okay. I'm like _better_ than okay!" I tried to reassure her despite the fact that my tongue felt rather heavy in my mouth. "You can tell Quil that too. Y'know that I'm having so much fun without him."

_Oops not Quil again!_

"This is Match by the way," I offered, gesturing toward my new friend. Nessie glanced up at him in confusion.

"Well okay…nice to meet you _Match_?"

I heard his deep chuckle from behind me as he stuck out a hand for her to shake. "It's Mitch actually. And who are you?"

Nessie regarded his hand like it was a dead fish. "I'm the one in charge of these two and we're leaving now."

She didn't even give us a chance to properly say goodbye to the guys, dragging us along with her super half-vampire strength that we were helpless to struggle against. We didn't stop moving until we were at the door where Leah stood with Riley who looked a little unsteady herself.

"Oh god what happened to these two?" Leah groaned the moment she laid eyes on us. Honestly I didn't think we looked _that_ bad…

Nessie sighed and pulled us toward the exit. "Shots apparently."

"Your hand is soo small Ness," I found myself remarking as we stepped into the cool night air. "It's like a china doll. Except you could kill me and the doll can't."

Riley and Irina burst into a round of giggles that turned out to be infectious. I almost lost my balance from just laughing so much. Or maybe the sidewalks in Port Angeles just liked to move around weird like that?

"Geeze how many drinks did you guys have?" Leah muttered once we were all settled into Riley's car.

_Like 4? 5?_

"Guys my brain can't do math, is that bad?" I asked, snuggling up against Irina who was still laughing about the china doll thing. She was sooo lame sometimes.

We had finally made it to my house when I remembered that my purse was still over at Quil's. I wasn't feeling as euphoric as I was earlier and I still felt kind of dizzy, but I knew one thing. I wanted that freakin purse and I wanted it now.

"I'm just gonna walk to Quil's to get my purse…" I informed no one in particular as I started to move unsteadily toward the doorway. Nessie was the only one in the living room to notice, seeing as Riley was already passed out in her bed and Leah was watching after Irina who was totally ralphing up everything in the bathroom. She blocked my path easily.

"No you're not."

"But I really, really want my stuff Nessie! I can't stop thinking about it."

Nessie fixed me with a quizzical stare. "This isn't just about seeing a certain person, is it?"

"No of course not silly!" I exclaimed with a laugh. "I just want my stuff. I have like chapstick in there that I need."

_It's not about seeing Quil. Definitely not!_

"Well fine, if you really feel that strongly about it…I'll drive you."

I squealed in triumph and hugged her tightly. "You're the best!"

It only took like five seconds to get to Quil and Embry's and we barged into the house easily since the door wasn't even locked. Quil and Jacob were in the living room watching TV and they both stood as we entered.

"Oh great you're here!" Jake exclaimed before coming over to pull Nessie against him in a hug. Quil and I just stood there looking at each other awkwardly.

_Freakin imprints looking all imprint-y and in love._

Jake pulled back to look at Nessie. "Why don't we drive back to your old place…I'm like dead and the beds there are way more comfortable than the couch in this dump."

"Hey that couch is perfectly fine!" Quil exclaimed indignantly and I couldn't help but giggle. Jake shrugged before staring me down with a grin.

"Well somebody definitely had a fun time tonight."

"Yep and I made some new friends!" I responded back excitedly. "Guys are really nice at the club!"

Jake's grin widened even more. "_Guys_? You hear that Quil? Claire-bear made some _friends_ at the bar."

I glanced over at Quil, expecting him to smile or something, but he didn't look very happy at all.

_Geeze grouchy much?_

"Well get your stuff Claire and we'll drive you back before we go to the Cullen place," Jake instructed me and I nodded.

"Why don't I just drive Claire back?" Quil suddenly interjected. "Her house is in the opposite direction so it'll be easier that way."

Nessie looked skeptical, eyeing me questioningly as she spoke. "What do you think Claire?"

I didn't really care. I just wanted my purse and my chapstick. Right?

"I'm down with whatever!"

My flippant reassurance must have satisfied her though because a minute later Quil and I were all alone.

_ALONE. TOGETHER._

"Where's Embry?" I asked abruptly and Quil's mouth clenched into a thin line.

"He's out."

"That's weird."

I started to move toward the couch, thinking my purse would be nearby, but my steps were annoyingly shaky. That coupled with the way I felt the need to just blurt out whatever I was thinking at any particular moment told me I probably wasn't sober. What was in that drink stuff?

"So are you feeling okay? You look a little unsteady."

I shook my head as if trying to clear it from the alcohol-induced fog it was under. Why was he asking me stuff anyway? He had Celeste to worry about, not me!

"I'm not really drunk," I muttered as the negative feelings started to resurface again.

"Here, let me get your purse for you."

Quil started to move past me, but I stopped him with a hand on his ridiculously muscled arm. I couldn't take this stupid polite shit anymore!

"You really…you really _suck_ Quil," I told him determinedly, rejoicing when he froze in place. "Do you know that?"

He shrugged out of my grip to look down at me with dark eyes. "C'mon Claire, I'm not that bad."

I felt myself warming under his gaze, but broke eye contact before things got out of hand. "No! Don't try to use your wolf sexy thing on ME!" I wailed, cringing when Quil's face broke into a full blown grin.

_Not cool!_

I sucked in a breath and continued as eloquently as my addled brain could manage. "Because that doesn't…even..work most of the time. I don't care if you have a 20 pack of abs or those pec things that look really good when you wear that one gray shirt…you know the one that shrunk in the wash that time Brady did your laundry?"

Quil was laughing and staring at me like I was crazy. What was the problem? Did he NOT remember when Brady did his laundry? Way to forget important life details Quil.

"So you think I'm sexy?" He practically growled. I knew he was a wolf and all, but it still took me by surprise. Breaking eye contact, I forced my mind to focus on the matter at hand rather than Quil's stupid growling. He needed to know how mad I was him dammit!

"No! Even if you kissed me I wouldn't care!" I shouted and Quil's eyes narrowed in on me.

"Is that so?" He took a few steps forward prompting me to take a few in the opposite direction.

"Uh-huh," I breathed when I felt my back hit the wall. Quil loomed over me like a big, sexy giant.

"You're so Quil," I mumbled when his hand came up to trace my neck.

He grinned. "I'm 'so Quil'?"

"Yea…like you're just so _you._" I giggled when he leaned forward to tug on my ear with his canine teeth.

"That-that tickles Quil!"

"I thought you said I couldn't affect you at all," Quil mocked with amusement in his deep, brown eyes. They looked like molten pools of chocolate and I wanted to dive in and swim around in them. Woah…imagine swimming in someone's eyes! Like 'everyone come down to the cornea pool. Oh wait kids let's go down the optic nerve water slide!' OMG that's fucking nuts.

"Why are you giggling Claire?" Quil whispered to me. He was still so, so close. I could smell him and I didn't even have wolf senses so that was saying a lot!

"It's just…your eyes…are like chocolate Jacuzzis."

Quil laughed and I couldn't stop the answering grin that took over my face. "You're crazy, y'know that?"

"Well so are you!" I exclaimed defiantly. "You have a therapist and everything…I don't have that!"

Quil's smiled faded as he digested my statement. He looked so serious when he went and did that.

"You're right. I must be crazy..." he breathed as his gaze seemed to fall on my lips. It was either that or the space _between_ my lips and nose and I figured that wasn't as interesting.

"Are my lips jacked up or something?"

Quil shook his head slowly. "No they're perfect."

"It's genetic I think. Like the DNA from my parents made them look like that…" I explained to him seriously as he broke into another one of his infuriating grins. I tried to control my traitorous heart, but I swear it flip flopped every time he looked at me like that.

"Well they should be proud. You have some good DNA right there."

"You're so sweet." God I wanted to kiss him. "Hey Quil your lips are pretty nice too."

"Are they?"

"Yea. I want to like touch them." So I did. I rubbed my fingers over his bottom lip and I think he groaned. Or my stomach rumbled or something. There was a noise is what I'm trying to say.

"They _feel_ nice too," I whispered, enjoying the sensation.

"But I don't affect you, right? Not at all?" Quil asked huskily.

"No way! I just think your DNA did a good job. Y'know like mine did." That was a lie but Quil couldn't tell right? RIGHT!

"Maybe our DNA should meet up close," Quil mumbled before lowering his lips onto mine. When the need for oxygen became too great for me to handle, we broke away and Quil continued kissing down my neck.

"That feels…really good Quil," I gasped, fisting my fingers in his thick hair as he left a path of fire along my throat. It was beyond amazing, but I wanted his lips against mine again. Thankfully he allowed me to pull his head up so that I could push forward to reach my goal.

_So perfect._

I couldn't keep from gasping into his mouth when he suddenly hoisted me up by the waist and pressed me back into the wall. _  
><em>

"Dammit Claire," He ground out between clenched teeth. "We shouldn't."

I pulled on his neck until I could suck on his plump bottom lip again and he made a strangled hissing sound. Hopefully that meant he liked it?

"Shut up Quil," I ordered. "Just kiss me okay?"

Quil's fingers clenched against my hips and before I could repeat my request, his lips were against my own.

_Finally!_

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><p><strong>AN: Well huh this chapter kind of took off and just got like out of control and way long. Some important points: 1. I do NOT advocate underage drinking! However, it does happen in the real world and they did use a DD, so remember that kids. Safety first! 2. Quil is NOT going to take advantage of a drunk-ish Claire...cuz that's just y'know completely wrong. Next chap will explain. Sorry if anything that did happen in the chapter offends, but it is rated mature sooo chill :) AND OMG GUYS! 300+ reviews? I'm shocked. And giddy. Never thought anyone would even read this crazy thang let alone review it haha. I appreciate every one of you so much. Have amazingly wonderful weekends, okay? XOXOX  
><strong>


	20. Love is a Drum

**Note: Hey sorry about the confusion with getting this chapter out! I've been having some major problems uploading stuff today IDK what's up with my account. Hopefully it worked okay this time? And can anyone let me know if you actually received the New Chapter Alert for this chapter? Just want to make sure! Thanks!  
><strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 20<strong>

_I'm just gonna follow your heart _

_I'm just as scared as you are _

_Love is a drum hear it beating, beating_

_I'm just gonna follow your heart _

_And I don't care where we are _

_Love is a drum hear it beating for you_

-Love is a Drum by Cider Sky

My mind was a jumbled, blurry mess. All I could focus on was the sensation of Quil kissing me and his hands holding my body tightly against his in a practically scorching embrace.

_Gah this is too much to handle!_

Suddenly though, Quil pulled away from me, breathing heavily. "We…really…_really_ have to stop this."

I was going to respond, but suddenly became distracted by the way he was biting his lip with his teeth.

_So hot..._

"C'mon Claire, I should take you home, shouldn't I?"

"No!" I gasped as his hands fell away from my waist and he moved back from my body. Quil's lip quirked up at my exclamation.

"You _don't_ want to go back to your house?"

"Not so much," I whispered, delighting in the way he seemed to perk up at my answer. "I'm feeling kinda dizzy…and…I don't think…"

"You can stay here," Quil interrupted before I continued to make a fool of myself. I jerked my eyes up to his even though I knew I looked eager as hell.

"I don't want to like _impose_, but that would be pretty ballin."

Quil laughed. "Did you just say 'ballin'? Wow. You really did drink a lot didn't you?"

I attempted to put my hands on my hips and glower at him, but my stupid boots tripped me up and I ended up falling into him instead. One of Quil's giant hands slid down my arm until he was gripping my fingers gently.

"C'mon, you can sleep in my room."

_WHAAAT?_

Quil must have noticed how my face contorted like I was having a brain aneurysm because he started shaking his head. "_I'll_ sleep on the couch."

"Oh…um…oh."

Apparently my drunken babble from earlier was now being replaced by a complete lack of speaking ability. I blamed all that ridiculous, amazing kissing.

_Maybe it's a good thing we stopped because I might not have a brain right now if things kept going. _

I followed Quil back to his room, pausing in the doorway as he busied himself with making sure there were enough blankets for me on his bed.

_**HIS** BED. OMG._

"Come here," Quil muttered, motioning me forward with his hand. I complied like a brainless moth following a light source that likely would turn out to be one of those fly zapper things.

_Buzzzzzz._

I stopped at the edge of the bed and waited for him to move away so that I could slip underneath the covers and hide my blushing face forever. Instead of giving me space however, Quil stepped toward me instead.

"You'll be warm enough in here right? And you feel okay? Not getting sick or anything?"

I shook my head, wincing as it caused the room to shift somewhat out of focus. "I'm okay I think. Just feel…a little weird."

"You should sit down then," Quil suggested while simultaneously guiding my body into a seated position. "And you should probably take off those boots too."

"Yea they kinda hurt," I conceded and together we managed to yank the shoes off of my feet. A few moments later I was underneath the covers and a little too warm for my liking due to Quil's insistence that I sleep with four different blankets.

"Okay then. I'll be in the living room if you need anything."

I watched him standing by the doorway with his hand on the light switch and experienced a flashback to my younger days when Quil had tucked me in for the night. It was kind of strange considering that we'd just kissed the crap out of each other only minutes ago.

_Oh my gosh…what is going to happen now?_

"Hey Quil?" I whispered as my eyelids sagged tiredly. I knew I needed to talk to him about all of this, but my body was practically shutting down by the second.

"Yea?"

I stifled a yawn. "Don't be…mad okay?"

Quil's eyebrows pinched together as he regarded me with confusion. "Why would I be mad?"

"Just because...because..." I yawned spectacularly, bringing my speech to a halt.

"You need to sleep Claire," Quil told me with a gentle voice. "I'll talk to you tomorrow okay? Just don't worry about anything right now."

I'm assuming that I nodded my head in agreement because suddenly the lights were off and Quil was gone. Obviously the talking would just have to wait until the next day.

_Tomorrow…talk to him tomorrow…_

It was light outside when my body finally jolted awake from what felt like not nearly enough sleep. Rubbing my eyes my eyes with the back of my hands, I squinted around at my surroundings and froze when I realized where I was.

_Shit. I'm in Quil's room. Apparently that was **not** a dream._

Suddenly my mind was bombarded with images of last night; how I'd acted like a drunken idiot in front of Quil, somehow goaded him into kissing me, and then basically taken over his bed, relegating him to the much less comfortable couch.

"Fuck," I swore out loud as embarrassment washed over me. What the hell had I been thinking coming over here last night and engaging in that gropefest with Quil? So much for trying to forget about him.

I attempted to sit up, but swore again when my head pounded in protest against the movement. The morning light shining through the window only exacerbated the agonizing headache I had so I forced myself to get out of bed and pull the blinds down.

_So is this what that hangover shit is all about?_

I moved to throw my lethargic body back onto Quil's bed when I caught my reflection in a mirror across the room.

_Aw fuck. _

A quick assessment of my present state revealed that I had slept rather fitfully because my hair was hopelessly tangled and my clothes rumpled more than I would have thought possible. Combine that with my bloodshot eyes and an imprint of my bracelet across my right cheek and yea, I was on my way to looking like one of those before/after meth addict photos. Me being the _AFTER_ photo obviously.

_Quil cannot see me like this!_

It took a few minutes of combing my fingers furiously through my hair before it managed to flatten down, but there wasn't much I could do about my eyes or face while still in Quil's room.

_Whatever. I'm sure he can hear me moving around anyways. Might as well get out there._

Grabbing my boots from beside the bed, I padded softly to the door and winced as it creaked open noisily. After peeking down the hallway like a scaredy cat, I forced myself forward to the living room where I figured Quil would be waiting for me.

But he wasn't.

Aside from the wrinkled pillow lying on the couch, there was strangely no sign of Quil anywhere.

_Weird._

I clutched my boots tightly in my hands and walked into the kitchen, assuming he would be there instead. Again however, there was no one.

"Quil?" I called out in a raspy voice. "Where are you?"

I was met only with an eerie silence.

"Quil!"

Still nothing. I walked throughout the house, even checking Embry's room, though I knew Quil's supernatural hearing would have picked up my voice long ago.

_So he left me here? _

A cold, empty feeling overtook me as I decided it was time to leave just like Quil had for whatever reason. Grabbing my purse off of the coffee table, I rushed out the door and paused when I stepped out onto the porch. Quil's truck wasn't even in the driveway!

"You're kidding me..." I whispered to myself in total shock. There was no way I could rationalize my way through this one when the evidence of Quil's escape was so apparent.

With wooden steps, I clambered down the porch and onto the driveway where I took a moment to lean heavily against Embry's car. I felt like shit, Quil had ditched me, and now I was stranded here at his house.

_Crap how am I getting home? _

I grudgingly pulled out my cellphone to call my sister, but paused when I noticed a text message from Leah. Apparently she and the other girls thought I had gone to stay with Nessie since the both of us were missing. This was definitely not going to be a fun phone call..

"Claire? What's going on?"

I flinched upon hearing a surprised, masculine voice and spun so that I could see who it was standing behind me. Unfortunately it wasn't Quil, but rather Embry who now waited for me to explain myself. But how was I going to do that?

"I um…need a ride?"

Embry stared at me blankly. "You need a ride?

"Yea. So can you take me home?" I mumbled, avoiding eye contact with him. The whole situation was just so awkward.

"Well alright," Embry responded carefully. "But Claire…why are you even here right now? Is something wrong?"

_Y'know just freakin everything!_

"I sort of stayed over here last night," I admitted quietly while Embry's eyebrows rose to his hairline.

"Why'd you do that?"

I shrugged in what I hoped was a nonchalant gesture though I doubted I could truly pull it off in my current state. "I left my purse here so I came to get it and well…I was kind of _intoxicated_ so Quil said I could sleep in his room."

"_What_?"

"He slept on the couch of course!" I added hastily upon seeing the alarm in Embry's expression. He seemed visibly relieved by my statement, but then began looking around the yard in confusion.

"But why is Quil's truck gone? Did he go somewhere?"

"I don't know," I admitted with no small amount of embarrassment. "He was gone when I woke up. That's why I need a ride home…"

Embry's eyes flashed dangerously and his large body appeared to tense. "Seriously? He just left you here? After all that shit he pulled last night, this is how he treats you?"

I wasn't completely sure what he was talking about, but it seemed important. "What are you talking about Em? What happened last night?"

"Quil and I sort of had it out," Embry muttered, sounding a bit ashamed. When he didn't appear to be continuing with his explanation, I nudged him with my elbow until he elaborated. "Basically after you left Quil was all pissed at me for no reason. Well…that's not true, there _was_ a reason, but he just didn't want to admit it."

_I am so confused._

"What reason?"

"You of course." Embry gestured to me like it was the most obvious thing in the world. Honestly it really freaking wasn't.

"What do you mean, 'me'?"

"Quil was jealous that the two of us seemed close."

_Really?_

I sputtered unintelligibly for a few seconds before Embry decided to keep going.

"And I may have yelled at him for causing you to walk home the other day when Celeste was here," he confessed a little sheepishly. "He totally deserved it though. But yea, Quil didn't take that very well."

"What did he do?"

"He accused me of meddling in other people's business and always worrying about how he treats you. I mean, it was classic jealousy all the way, especially when he told me that I didn't understand his relationship with you or something like that."

_HOLD UP. Relationship?_

Embry sighed wearily and shook his head. "Like _he_ even knows what he's talking about…memory challenged asshole."

I was barely even listening to Embry now as my brain dissected Quil's cryptic words from their argument. What was Quil thinking? Did he really have romantic feelings toward me and if so, why would he see Celeste then? And why would he leave me here with no explanation? It just didn't make sense!

"Embry," I croaked after a period of silence. "Please just take me home. I can't be here right now."

Embry nodded, before pulling out his car keys. "Okay then. Let's go."

After we arrived at my house, I quickly went inside, trying to be as quiet as possible in case the girls were still sleeping or something. I needn't have bothered though because the moment I entered the living room, I could hear voices coming loudly from the kitchen.

"Why don't you have any bacon?"

"I wanted to be vegetarian last week. I don't know."

I gave a weak smile as I heard Leah and Riley's grumbling exchange about our lack of breakfast meats and decided I should probably alert them to my presence sooner rather than later.

"Hey guys," I greeted casually when I strolled into the kitchen. Irina was seated at the table with her head down, while Riley and Leah hovered around the fridge searching for food options. All three of them perked up at my entrance, but didn't seem too surprised to see me.

"Oh did you just get dropped off by Nessie and Jake?" Riley questioned absently before rummaging through a drawer again. I froze, unsure of how to proceed.

"Well I—"

"Claaaire, I feel _terrible!_" Irina saved me with her dramatic interruption and then threw her head back down on the table.

_Yea. Tell me about it girlfriend._

"Dammit. I am _not_ eating freakin cottage cheese for breakfast. Let's go."

Leah pushed the refrigerator door closed before Riley could protest and gave Irina a nudge on the shoulder.

"We're going to the diner ladies."

Leah's determined gaze swept around the room as if challenging us to object, but Riley and Irina seemed pleased enough with the decision. I, on the other hand, knew I could only keep this Quil thing a secret for so long and I wasn't yet ready to discuss it, especially in a crowded restaurant.

"Uh I'm not going to the diner," I told them as we all filed into the living room. Riley regarded me with a confused stare. She knew me well enough to know that I wouldn't turn down food without a good reason.

"Why not lil Claire-cub?"

I bristled, momentarily forgetting to respond to her question. "Okay seriously…I _hate _when you call me Claire-cub. I mean Claire-bear is bad enough without it getting even _more_ cutesy!"

"What about Claire-the-grizzly-bear?" Irina mumbled thoughtfully and I glared at her. "I mean, that's not cute right? It's badass. Scary even!"

"Okay _this_ is why I'm not going to the diner," I growled earning a few snickers from my annoying audience. "And I…I ate already so yea."

_Lies. But whatever. _

"Oh fine," Riley conceded while she tugged on a pair of sneakers. "We'll see you after we're finished, ya grouch."

"I'm _not_ a grouch."

"You tell her Claire!" Irina cried. "You're a motha effin GRIZZLY."

"_Irina_."

"Kidding, kidding. Love you, byeee!"

Once they we're finally out the door and had driven off, I let my body sag under the weight of all the stress it was under. They obviously still assumed that I had stayed over with Nessie and I hadn't bothered to correct them. I could just imagine how the conversation would've went if they knew where and _who_ I had really stayed with.

_Ugh. Stupid Quil. Why can't things ever go the way I want with him?_

I couldn't stop the snort of annoyance that left my mouth as I dragged my feet down the hallway toward the bathroom. The shower was kind of calling my name and I knew it would make me feel at least a little bit better if I cleaned off.

_Plus I'll look more like a human being._

Thirty minutes later and I was fresh again, but still miserable because of what had happened with Quil. Freakin story of my lame, Quil-obsessed life.

_Speak of the devil..._

As if he somehow knew I was wo

rrying over him, the wolf in question decided now was the opportune moment to grace me with a phone call. I was tempted not to answer, but why give him the silent treatment when I could be a bitch instead?

"What?" I spat bitterly, rolling my eyes at the surprised huff that Quil emitted.

"Where are you?"

"I'm at home right now. Embry brought me."

"You're with _Embry_?" Quil questioned in a clipped tone that revealed his displeasure with my answer. I didn't understand why he put on this dumb jealous act when he clearly didn't care enough to refrain from abandoning me in the morning!

"Well he's not here right now if that's what you're wondering," I drawled with as much nonchalance as I could muster.

"Good. I'm coming over right now and I need to talk to you."

_Oh __**now**__ he wants to talk?_

"Whatever. I don't care."

Quil made a weird growling noise, but when he spoke his voice was calm. "Okay then I'll see you in a minute. Bye."

After we both hung up I considered giving Quil a dose of his own medicine by disappearing from the house, but decided against it seeing as we really did need to talk. I had no clue what he was planning on saying to me so I tried to prepare my own speech while I waited.

_Quil. I know everything is really weird between us and I haven't always been honest with you, but that needs to change. You can't just treat me like I'm some stupid girl you can mess around with on the side while you're actually dating someone else. It's not right and I deserve better! In fact I'm..._

A swift succession of knocks on the door interrupted my inner monologue, promptly causing all of it to flee my brain. I didn't have time to worry about it though because my fingers were already turning the door handle seemingly of their own accord. Quil's tall, imposing form was suddenly in front of me in the doorway, clad in a pair of shorts and a black t shirt that stretched tight across his chest.

_Why does he always have to look so good? Damn him._

"Claire," He breathed, sounding relieved. I swallowed down a nervous lump in my throat as his chocolate eyes skimmed up and down my body that was tensed up against the open door.

"Quil," I mumbled in a weaker tone than I had intended. I paused so that I could make my voice more commanding for the next question. "Where the heck were you this morning?"

Quil looked surprised. "You didn't see the note?"

"What note?"

One of Quil's hands reached up to tug at his hair and I followed the path of it with my eyes. He was obviously distressed by my reaction to this note business.

"I left you a note on the nightstand that I had to go somewhere, but I would be back really soon," Quil explained quickly. "Honestly, I didn't even think you would wake up until I was back. You were pretty out of it last night."

My mind went blank at this unexpected revelation. I hadn't seen any notes this morning, but then again I didn't recall even glancing at the nightstand in my haste to close the blinds.

"Oh. I didn't see it."

Quil sighed in a manner that suggested he was upset with himself. "Well I should've made it more obvious I guess. Sorry."

"Yea I'm not that perceptive."

We both stared at each other for a moment before Quil's brow furrowed in concentration. "So is that why you left with...with Embry then? Because I was gone?"

_Weird question. _

"Pretty much," I answered with a slight shrug. Quil's eyes that had been trained on my face turned away to stare instead at the worn door jam.

"I was just worried I guess," he admitted in a soft voice that inexplicably startled me. "That you would misunderstand about last night."

_Oh no. He's actually calling me out on my feelings for him!_

I sucked in a shaky breath that didn't feel close to adequate while my hands fidgeted with the doorknob. "Misunderstand?"

His eyes remained firmly away from mine. "You know...about what happened with us. I didn't want you to get the wrong idea."

I flinched as my heart seemed to plummet from my chest down to the soles of my feet. Was this how Quil planned to tell me he was seeing Celeste and that kissing me had been some big mistake? I seriously couldn't handle that rejection again.

"You know what Quil? I'm tired of this," I declared quietly, but firmly. "I know I was drunk and I'm sorry for forcing you to look after me. I-I shouldn't have done what I did."

Quil looked at me like I had slapped him. "Wait you really mean that? It was just a mistake?"

"Isn't that what you told me last time we kissed? What's the difference!" I yelled back as the anger and hurt bubbled up inside me, demanding to be unleashed. Maybe I would lose Quil's friendship forever over this, but I couldn't keep pretending anymore.

"I was stupid Claire. I just didn't know how to deal with all of it," Quil tried to assure me with a pleading edge to his deep timbre. I refused to let myself be affected by it and plowed forward with my speech.

"Well I'm making it easy on you this time. You don't have to worry about me anymore because I'll be just-just _fine_!"

Quil's body began to subtly lean toward me. "That's not what I meant Claire. Give me a chance to exp—"

"Just save it!" I hissed angrily. "I'm sure you have _Celeste_ waiting for you anyway and I wouldn't want to take up your time."

"_Celeste_? You really think I'm dating her?"

I crossed my arms across my chest and leaned my side even more firmly against the door. "And you think I'm actually seeing _Embry_?"

"Are you?"

"Well are _you_ with Celeste?"

Quil groaned in exasperation. "Seriously? She's my therapist Claire. I can't date her! And even if she wasn't, I don't think of her like that. She's just someone to talk to that's outside of the pack…" He paused like he was searching for the right words to say, while I held my breath nervously. "I guess sometimes it's nice to be around people that don't know how I was before the accident. I don't feel like I'm expected to be the _old_ Quil or whatever. I don't know."

_Huh? _

"Wait so you're…you're _not_ interested in Celeste?" I muttered after a brief silence settled over us. Quil's eyes flickered with a strange emotion as his gaze lingered on my face.

"No. I'm not."

I knew it would sound utterly pathetic, but I couldn't stop myself from asking. "Why?"

"Because," Quil replied seriously before moving even closer. "I have feelings for someone else."

_OH. MY. GOD. _

"Oh? Well that's…interesting…"

"_Interesting_?" Quil repeated with a hint of amusement in his voice. There was no hiding the way he affected me as my whole body shuddered when his warm hand reached up to brush my cheek.

_Note to heart: Do not beat out of chest. Death may result. _

Suddenly however, Quil's warmth was moving away from me and I reeled at the loss of contact. When I stared up at him, his face had become chillingly serious and I struggled to understand why.

"Quil, what is it? What's wrong?" I whispered, though I was afraid to hear his answer. Quil's strong jaw clenched before he spoke.

"I like you Claire. I _really _like you."

My heart may have stopped beating altogether. "You do?"

Quil nodded, but looked decidedly conflicted by the affirmation. "I know I shouldn't because you're part of the family and we were best friends before everything, but I _can't_…dammit I can't help it anymore."

I was stunned speechless by his admission, reduced to simply gaping at him in shock. Thankfully Quil decided to use my silence to continue blowing my motherlovin mind.

"And I know you're kind of _attracted_ to me, but that doesn't have to mean anything more if you don't want. You're still pretty young after all…"

_Not this shit again._

"Um no. I'm going to stop you right there," I muttered as my voice decided now was a good time to return. "I'm not some stupid kid with a crush on an older dude!"

"I just mean that you—" Quil attempted to explain, but I cut him off.

"No! I lo—_like_ you too Quil. Quite a lot actually." My cheeks reddened, but I forced myself to maintain eye contact with the surprised man in front of me. "And I'm 18 years old by the way. That's considered being an adult last time I checked."

Quil's breath left in a long exhale as if he had somehow been holding it in for the past five minutes. "Oh. Well yea."

_That's all he has to say? _

My newfound confidence faded a bit under his oddly blank stare, however there was no way I could back down now. I had to know what he really felt about me. "So do you mean it then? You uh...you like...you really like me more than just a friend?"

"Yea. I do," Quil told me, suddenly sure of himself again. "I like you quite a lot actually."

I giggled at his imitation of my words, but the mirth didn't last very long because Quil was moving toward me only a moment later.

"Well then if we both feel the same way…then maybe we could just try this out? See if we can be more than friends?"

"I'm down," I sighed, when his hands came to rest on my waist.

"Good. Because I really don't think it would be appropriate if I kissed my _friend_ right now," Quil murmured huskily, stopping in his forward progress to press his forehead against mine. "And I really need to kiss you Claire."

_This can't be real right? Quil didn't actually tell me this stuff, did he?_

But when our lips met together in a sweet, gentle kiss I knew it wasn't a dream. There was no way I was creative enough to come up with all of this stuff. No freakin way!

And as he pressed me against the open door, molding all of his hard muscles against my…well kind of pathetic curves, I think a firework explosion happened in my brain or something. There was a good chance it was due to the mass message every single one of my neurons was flooding my body with:

_ATTENTION: QUIL ATEARA FUCKING LIKES ME! _

Yea. I could definitely get used to this.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Oh my goodness..there's FEELINGS? And they're out there in the open? Kinda blowin your mind isn't it? ;) Well my brain is basically dead right now, so hope yours is cool. Reviews may help revive me? idk. just a theory. I love you guys! And as always, heaps of thanks for your support :D<strong>

**AND TO ALL MY AMERICAN BRETHREN: Happy 4th of July (belated)! yay AMURRICAAA. Yay fireworks! Just don't get yourselves burned. Being patriotic is NOT worth that. Jus sayin.  
><strong>


	21. Lucky

**Chapter 21**

_I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend_

_Lucky to have been where I have been _

_Lucky to be coming home again_

-Lucky by Jason Mraz and Colbie Caillat

"So do you remember calling my eyes 'Chocolate Jacuzzis' last night?"

My face immediately heated in response to Quil's mocking question and there was nowhere to hide when we were sitting so close to each other. "Oh my god. Stop _now_."

"Why? It was maybe the best compliment I've ever received," Quil teased, ignoring my request completely.

"Quil just shut up," I sighed with only a hint of exasperation. It was really hard to feign true annoyance when I was this deliriously happy.

"Fine, you're no fun."

We managed to glare at each for all of five seconds before those adorable, dopey smiles appeared once again on our faces and Quil shifted my body even closer to his on the couch.

_We are just too frickin cute huh?_

Riley and the rest of the girls were out eating at the local diner, leaving Quil and I to indulge in the novelty of finally being…well _together_. Honestly, I was still having trouble comprehending the fact that my unrequited love wasn't as unrequited as previously thought, though I knew Quil's feelings probably weren't anywhere as deep as mine.

_Not that I'm complaining!_

I shivered as warm fingers brushed lightly over the skin of my arm, eliciting goosebumps in their wake. It was kind of ridiculous how easily Quil affected me and I knew I needed to focus on something else if I didn't want to embarrass myself by like moaning or something.

"So um… where did you have to go this morning?" I wondered, causing the hand that had been rubbing comfortingly down my upper arm to pause.

"It doesn't really matter," he mumbled cryptically. Such a dumb wolf, now I _had_ to know.

"C'mon, I want to know."

Quil glanced down at me while I gave him my best puppy dog eyes. "_Please_ Quil…it obviously was important if it could drag you away from _me._"

"Fine," Quil relented with an unconvincing sigh of exasperation. "I had to meet Celeste to clear something up."

_CELESTE?!_

Though Quil had assured me earlier that he had no interest in her, it was still unsettling and surprising to hear that he had left me to go see _her_.

"Oh. Why did you need to meet up?"

Quil must have noticed the discomfort in my tone because he gave my shoulder a calming squeeze. "I wanted to let her know that I won't be coming to therapy sessions anymore."

"And you needed to tell her _in person_?"

I could feel Quil fidget next to me. "Well...I thought it would be more polite that way."

_Yeeea. Not buying it._

"What aren't you telling me?" I questioned after an awkward silence where Quil seemed to be trying to avoid eye contact with me. "Wait…oh my gosh…were you having a secret _tryst_!"

Quil actually laughed for a second before realizing that I may have been totally serious and then he shifted to shaking his head vehemently back and forth.

"God no. Definitely not a 'tryst'!" His lip quirked up in amusement. "But seriously who even says _tryst_?"

"Tons of people," I replied defensively. "And that's not the point! What was so important that you needed to tell Therabi—I mean _Celeste_, in person?"

Quil stared at me for a moment and then threw his head back against the couch with a heavy sigh. "Okay I'll tell you, but you can't get mad, okay?"

"I won't," I promised immediately, though there was no telling if I would hold true to it.

"So I met up with Celeste because…well because I _did _need to tell her that I'm not coming to therapy sessions," Quil began and then paused until I elbowed him in the stomach to continue. "But I also needed her to understand that I'm not interested in her…like _that_."

I could feel my eyebrows rising in surprise. Not that I was actually shocked that Celeste would have her eye set on Quil, but I guess I had assumed that wasn't the case when Quil had assured me he only thought of her as a friend.

"But I thought you guys were just _friends_?" I questioned in a soft, unsure voice.

"She is just a friend! It's just that she uh may have started to want something a little more out of it."

_Of course. There was no way she acted that flirty without having ulterior motives._

"I didn't even notice until recently, but even then I never…I mean I didn't ever reciprocate obviously," Quil muttered, giving me a pointed stare. He seemed rather intent on making sure I didn't misunderstand this Celeste thing and honestly, it was kind of cute watching him fumble through it.

"Are you sure?" I teased though Quil seemed to take it as a serious inquiry and proceeded to gape at me in disbelief.

"_Claire_, of course I'm sure. Why do you think I drove to Port Angeles to tell Celeste I couldn't see her anymore? I just figured it would be better to do it in person…you know, since she _was_ really nice to me all this time."

_This is adorable._

"Well, it's not like you have to stop hanging out with her on account of me. If you want to be friends with her I guess I could—"

Quil stopped my speech with a swift peck to my lips before he pulled away with a grin. "Oh give it a rest. You totally hate her. Plus, I don't think she really wants to be my _friend_, especially after I set her straight."

"What did you tell her anyway?" I wondered as I stifled a giggle at Quil's roguish behavior. He was really making it hard not to just burst into a fit of giddy squealing.

"I told her I kind of have a thing for this one girl; she's kinda short, crazy, eats a lot…" I cut him off with a sharp slap to his arm, which he threaded around my waist to pull me onto his lap.

"Hey! That's not very—"

"You didn't let me finish!" He admonished with a deep laugh. "As I was going to say…_this girl I like_…" He paused to raise an eyebrow at me suggestively. "Well she's pretty cool. She makes me laugh, maybe not always on purpose, but still…"

His grin widened and I felt my heart flutter excitedly within my chest. "And she's a pretty badass volleyball player. Kinda scary when she gets going actually."

"I'm not scary, I'm _passionate!_" I declared, pointing a finger into his rock hard chest. Quil only smirked as a playful glint filled his eyes.

"Who said I was talking about _you_?"

Even though I knew he was only being facetious, I couldn't help but blush at his comment. He totally noticed too, the big jerk.

"You suck," I grumbled while trying to move off of Quil's lap. His giant hands fastened firmly to my hips however, urging me to stay in place.

"And she's not very creative with insults," he added to the list of qualities that I knew described myself. "But…" Quil continued, looking me squarely in the eye. "I like all of that apparently."

The way he was staring at me caused another round of heart palpitations that I tried my best to ignore, albeit to no avail.

"Plus it kind of helps that you're gorgeous," Quil mused in a soft, nonchalant voice that belied the gravity of his words. It took me a second to regain speaking ability.

"I-I thought you weren't talking about _me_," I mumbled throatily. Obviously I mega failed at being cool and collected.

Quil tilted his head to the side as if deep in thought. "I may have been after all."

"Oh really?"

We steadily moved in closer until our faces were only inches apart and Quil's chest was pressed against mine. It was rather heavenly.

"Yea," Quil mumbled, brushing our lips together. "Here, let me prove it…"

_Gahhhhh._

After Quil successfully distracted me for another few minutes, we both determined that it would be best if he went home before the girls got back and questioned the crap out of us.

"Bye Quil," I mumbled into his chest while hugging him rather tightly. It was hard to let him go now that I knew he wanted to be with me too.

"I'll call you later," Quil assured me before loosening his arms from around my body and stepping near the open door. I watched him stride across the lawn toward the woods a few moments later, only closing the door when he was out of sight.

_So…_

Now that Quil was gone, my body seemed to finally register the gravity of what had just happened between us.

_Sweet baby Jesus! This is REAL LIFE._

There was no point stopping the ecstatic squeal that escaped my lips as I succumbed to the overwhelming urge to jump up and down like an excited child. And what began as simple celebrating soon turned into a full-on crazy-happy dance on the coffee table.

_Screw it. I've waited practically my whole dang life for this._

Unfortunately that's when my sister and friends decided to barge into the living room grumbling about how stuffed they felt from their grease-laden meals.

"What the hell?"

My legs froze on the table as the trio eyed me with varying looks of confusion and concern. "Uh hey guys."

"What are you doing on there?" Riley questioned as I jumped down to the carpet.

"There was…a…bug!" I lied. "Y'know on the floor. It was…like scary and stuff?"

"Ew gross!" Irina exclaimed, suddenly scanning the ground with watchful eyes. Leah on the other hand, only shrugged before declaring that she was glad I didn't weigh much or the rickety table probably would have collapsed underneath me.

"So just don't climb on furniture, okay?" Riley seconded Leah's concern and I shrugged. It's not like I hadn't jumped on the table before or anything.

"And you may want to brush your hair before we go over to Emily's later…it looks kind of rumpled."

I blushed, remembering exactly the reason for my disheveled state. "Emily's?"

Riley gave a quick nod. "Yea she wants to make dinner since Leah's visiting. I'm sure a bunch of the guys will be there."

_I have to interact with Quil in front of the whole pack right away? Dangit._

"Well I'll see you guys later then," Irina sighed as she began gathering up her belongings. " I have to watch the little bro today unfortunately."

We all said our quick goodbyes before she drove off and then I made my way down the hallway to my room to ponder the upcoming visit to Emily's. I paced around for a moment before pulling my cellphone out to text Quil. But then I wasn't sure how to address him:

_Hey lover! Shall we rendezvous at Emily's and profess our devotion to one another in front of the family? Love Your Claire_

Ehhh too intense? Perhaps a more casual approach?

_Sup buddy? Me. You. Emily's. BE THERE. _

No, no. Now it was _too_ casual. Try again.

_So will I be seeing you at Emily's later? xo Claire_

Whatever. Close enough. I hit send and tossed the phone onto my bed, following it with my body a few seconds later. Luckily I didn't have to wait long for Quil to respond otherwise the softness of my fuzzy comforter may have lulled me into more sleep.

_I'll be there if you are :) _

He was so cute! My face split into a wide smile as I read Quil's short message and I let my head fall back against the pillow happily.

_Good to hear. I already miss your weirdo face for some reason hehe :P_

I giggled when I received Quil's practically immediate reply.

_Don't lie. We both know you only want me for my body…_

_Dangit how'd you find out?_

_Another one of your drunken admissions._

_Shit. I suck._

_I still like you. Suckage and all._

_:D I'm jumping for joy!_

_Are you really? I bet you're just lying there in a ball._

I glanced around, cursing the fact that he was totally right. Apparently I'm kind of a sloth.

_Well I don't have a 'passed-out-on-the-bed' emoticon sooo…_

_Okay. You win. _

_YESSSS. _

_I'll see you soon :)_

_Later gator xoxo_

So I definitely ended up falling asleep after that and remained that way until Riley stubbed her toe on something and cursed so loudly I thought there was an intruder coming in the house. After joining her and Leah again in the living room, we watched some TV for a while and then eventually made our way over to Sam and Emily's house.

"Looks like we're the last ones here," Leah commented as we walked into the crowded living room, but I noticed that the one person I was interested in seeing didn't appear to be among the group. Our entrance resulted in a bunch of the guys immediately coming over to greet Leah and I used the opportunity to discreetly slip away from the throng in search of Quil.

"Hey Claire-bear!" Seth's cheerful voice stopped me as I moved to enter the kitchen. I mumbled a quick 'hey' before attempting to side-step his giant body.

"Wait a second, the food's not even ready yet and you haven't seen me in forever!" Seth managed to let a slight frown cloud his usual sunny expression, effectively stopping me in my tracks. I guess I couldn't let my Quil search trump my other friendships right?

"Yea I know. It's been weird lately huh?"

Seth gave a quick nod and his easy smile fell into place once more. "Well the guys were getting a little worried about you this past week seeing as you didn't seem to want to leave your house and all, but you're here now so that's a relief."

"Thanks Sethy. I'm great, I swear," I responded back truthfully. This really was the greatest I had felt in a while and I'm sure it was evident all over my face.

"You do look really happy," Seth remarked, staring down at me with a thoughtful gaze. "Did something happen?"

My responding blush was more than telling, but I simply shrugged, hoping he would somehow miss it. Wishful thinking on my part. He didn't miss a freakin thing.

"What?"

I coughed. "What do you mean, _what_?"

"Not that it's not a good look for you, but you're as red as a tomato. What's that about?"

_Cut me a break Seth!_

"Oh am I?" I muttered with a fake chuckle. "That's weird. Guess I should go to the bathroom and splash water on my face or something."

This time I breezed by Seth successfully, not stopping until I was halfway down the hallway that led to the bedrooms and bathroom.

"Hey Claire!" A high-pitched voice startled me as little Grayson Uley burst forth from his bedroom clutching a toy truck in his hands.

"Oh hey buddy," I answered back, giving his hair an affectionate ruffle. "That's a pretty sweet lookin truck you got there."

Grayson grinned at the compliment. "It's just like Uncle Quil's!"

"Sure is," a much deeper voice seconded my young cousin's comment and I was surprised to see Quil walk out of Grayson's bedroom as well. Immediately our eyes met and I found myself smiling like a complete idiot.

"Why don't you show your truck to Uncle Embry too?" Quil suggested, prompting an enthusiastic reaction from Grayson who took off down the hallway a moment later. We were alone. And for some reason I was nervous.

"So…" Quil breathed out, eyeing me from across the hall. He had verified his feelings for me this morning and yet I still felt like any second he was going to change his mind.

"So…" I echoed back, fighting the butterflies that were flitting around in my stomach. Quil slowly pushed his body off of the wall and moved so that he was directly in front of me.

"Hi."

Before I could react to his random greeting, his lips had descended onto my own for a short, but impossibly sweet kiss. He pulled away and glanced down at me with a playful smile that made my body fill with tingles.

"H-hey," I mumbled, feeling a bit flustered by our exchange. This whole intimacy thing was still novel for me.

"You okay?" Quil questioned and I nodded back. "You look a little _flushed."_

_Yea I know. Thanks._

"It's your fault," I quipped with fake annoyance. Quil raised one of his dark eyebrows in my direction, obviously enjoying this.

"How so?"

He lifted a hand to my cheek, tenderly brushing the warmed skin with his knuckles and I actually shivered.

"I think that's your answer."

Quil leaned over a bit more, so that we were practically flush against one another in the dim hallway. "I just can't help it. You're so cute."

I stifled a pleased giggle that threatened to escape when he flicked me on the nose playfully and retaliated by swatting his giant arm. Our flirting was cut short however, when another figure in the form of one Embry Call, appeared in the hall. Ha, that rhymed.

"Oh there you guys are," he muttered in a casual voice. "So what're you two doing back here?"

His eyes flicked back and forth between us, obviously taking in our close proximity and guilty expressions. Well, at least _my _expression was guilty; Quil seemed composed enough to simply shrug off his prying.

"Oh you know, just hanging out. Is the food ready?"

Embry nodded slowly as a knowing smirk worked its way onto his face. "Yep food's done. But no rush or anything. You guys look kinda _busy_ anyway…"

I tried not to blush again at his suggestiveness and instead grabbed Quil's hand and pulled him after me toward the kitchen.

"No we're hungry right Quil?"

"Yep."

I ignored Embry's chuckle from behind us as we made our way into the bustling room that smelled of a delicious meal to come. Quil and I ended up sitting at the kitchen table with Brady and Collin who annoyingly wedged their way in between us. I had hoped that I could at least hold hands with Quil under the table or something since we obviously weren't announcing our relationship to the family right away. Now I could only share covert glances with him across the table. How lame.

_There's always footsie…_

Smiling inwardly at the thought of playing footsie under the table with Quil, I stretched my foot forward until I reached the target I was looking for. Without looking up, I ran my toes lightly over the exposed skin of Quil's foot and grinned down at my plate.

"Uh who just rubbed me?"

_Crap._

Collin was glancing around the table with a confused, yet amused expression. Dammit. I should have known better than to attempt any form of flirting around these two.

"Was it you Claire?" He accosted with a teasing smile. "Cuz it felt like a girl's foot and as far as I know, you and Brady are the only girls here."

"Hey!" Brady exclaimed, looking a bit scandalized. "I didn't mess with your nasty feet."

"Guess it was Claire-bear then!"

"No, definitely not—" I began a bit too defensively. From across the table Quil's lips began to quirk up as he realized my mistake.

"_Claire_," Collin interrupted my denial with an exaggerated exhale. "I know I'm ridiculously attractive and all, but can you please restrain yourself while we're eating?"

Brady snorted into his glass of milk, while I rolled my eyes at their immature antics. This just further proved that it was probably better if Quil and I kept the fact that we were like groping each other and stuff on the down low.

_Definitely the smart choice._

Eventually the awkward meal ended and we all migrated to the living room where I ended up squished between Riley and Quil on the couch. While Riley rambled on about some medical conference that the Health Clinic would be sending her to in the next month, I was thoroughly distracted by the way I could feel Quil's muscular leg pressed against mine.

_Is it getting hot in here or is it just me?_

Riley must have noticed my indifference to her conversation because she began talking to Nessie instead while Quil and I started mock fighting over the last of the brownies that Emily had set on the table.

"You've already had _two!_" I admonished with a slap to Quil's hand when he reached for the final, chocolately square. "I only got one!"

"But I'm bigger than you," Quil reasoned, grabbing the brownie anyway. I tried to glare, but ended up giggling when he dangled the dessert in front of my face, whipping it away each time I tried to grab it.

"Stop being a dork and hand it over!"

"Just take it Claire-bear, it's right there!"

Soon the poor brownie ended up falling to pieces due to our squabbling, causing me to laugh so hard that it took me a moment to notice how everyone seemed to be staring at us.

_Awkwarddd._

"Well aren't you guys cute?" Collin chirped from across the room, causing Emily to glare over at him reprovingly. I assume she was trying to spare me any embarrassment regarding what she figured to be a friends-only relationship, because she shifted the conversation to how Leah had gone clubbing with us the other night.

_Too bad the events of that night are probably just as embarrassing._

Thankfully, Leah took over the discussion with details about how lacking the Port Angeles nightlife scene really was and I rested easy knowing she wouldn't spill the beans about how drunk I had gotten. My peaceful state didn't last long however, as I registered Jacob recounting something about the drive back to Nessie's place that night.

"So we're driving over to the old Cullen place at like 3 am and we get to that one really sharp turn, y'know the one right before their driveway?" Jake rambled on, looking around the circle to receive unnecessary affirmation. "Anyway, we round the turn and BAM! There's like an entire raccoon family just hanging out there, having a little nighttime party in the middle of the road."

"It was so adorable!" Nessie chimed in, earning an affectionate look from her imprint.

"It was bad news, is what it was," Jake continued with a fond grin. "Honestly, I didn't want to mess up my car and I was prepared to just take em out… "

"Oh please, you wouldn't have killed those raccoons in a million years!"

Jacob chuckled, but shrugged off Nessie's interruption to proceed with the story. "But yea Nessie wouldn't stand for it, so I ended up having to swerve around them and ended up clipping my passenger side mirror on a tree or something."

"Guess the brand new car isn't so brand new anymore?" Quil teased from beside me and Jacob managed an unconvincing scowl. On my other side, I could feel Riley shifting her weight on the couch cushion.

"So did Claire freak out when you went all fast and furious around the raccoons?" She questioned in a light, playful manner that shouldn't have made my heartbeat stutter. I held my breath as Jacob regarded her with a confused stare that pinched his brows together.

"It was after we left Quil's so she wasn't with us at that point. Probably a good thing, right Claire-bear?"

"R-right," I mumbled hoarsely while Riley and Leah exchanged pointed looks with each other and then over in my direction.

"Oh. So you didn't drive Claire home then?" Riley pressed.

_Oh my god. Why here? Why now?_

Jake obviously didn't pick up on the seriousness of the situation because he simply shook his head and casually threw an arm over Nessie's slight shoulders. "No Quil did, right?"

Suddenly everyone seemed to be completely silent. It was fucking scary. I could feel my Aunt Emily's eyes boring into my face, but I refused to look at her

"Yea. That's right." Luckily Leah decided to intervene before Quil and I had to flub our way through a lie about how I didn't stay over his house that night. Emily regarded us shrewdly for another few moments, but seemed appeased enough to drop the matter and move onto something else.

Unfortunately Riley and Leah now knew that I hadn't slept over at the Cullen's with Nessie and Jake like they had assumed and there was no way out of the interrogation that would most definitely follow our family gathering.

_Greeeat._

"Well we should probably head out," Leah informed everyone after the evening had started drawing to a close. She still had to drive back to her place in Oregon and that was at least 3 hours away.

"We should have a bonfire or something soon and you can come up again," Emily told Leah as they hugged each other by the doorway. I barely registered Leah's response though because Quil decided to hug me at that very moment, whispering a quick 'I'll call you later' in my ear before he released me. I was sure that the commotion of goodbyes around us was enough to even evade wolf-hearing, but Embry and Jake both grinned at me strangely as I skipped down the porch toward the car.

_Do they know?_

I must have been thoroughly fixated on the guys' odd reactions when I slipped into the backseat because I didn't even consider the two women who were currently ready to ambush me.

"So Claire…" Riley's chillingly calm voice echoed throughout the car, breaking me from my reverie. "Is there something you want to share with us?"

_Oh shit._

The secret was pretty much out by this point, but in a moment of panic I just blurted out the first thing that came to mind. "I didn't do anything!"

Wow. That wasn't incriminating at all.

Leah snorted while Riley just shook her head and peeked at me from over her shoulder. "So you might be the worst liar in the world Claire. Just saying…"

"She's right," Leah agreed, "So just tell us how you ended up sleeping at Quil's and get it over with."

I sighed heavily, knowing I had to tell the embarrassing truth. "Oh fine. I was drunk, I wanted to get my purse from Quil's so Nessie drove me, but then she left with Jake and I was _supposed_ to get driven back home, but like stuff…happened…."

Riley and Leah exchanged glances. "_Stuff_?"

"Y'know…I was too drunk to really do anything except pass out so Quil let me stay there." I tried to sound nonchalant about everything, but I knew neither of them was buying it.

"Something else definitely happened," Riley accused shrewdly, throwing me another glance from the front seat. "Just spill it."

"Ughh geeze. Okay. Don't freak, but we maybe sort of kissed for like a second."

"Oh my god I knew it!"

"You did?"

Riley nodded triumphantly while Leah appeared to stifle another amused snort. She totally did not take my love life seriously.

"So what happened after that? He better not have tried anything with you…I mean you _were_ drunk. "

"No, nothing like _that._ I just went to sleep and he stayed on the couch. And then the next day…well he told me he wanted to like 'try things out' with us…so yea. We're uh doing that," I mumbled, suddenly feeling a little embarrassed. It didn't help that Riley was simultaneously being the excited big sis and the overprotective parent. After my last statement though, she seemed to decide on her true role.

"Ahh! I told you! He could _not_ resist your charms…totally runs in the family you know."

_I guess she's cool with it then?_

"Yea…those charms…they'll get ya every time."

Riley and Leah didn't even appear to be listening to me as they began discussing the implications of my new relationship with Quil.

_What is our relationship now?_

I propped my head up against the window as I considered that question. Quil and I had always fit together so easily, so naturally, that I had never imagined things could change and become so complicated between us.

_That was before hormones and memory loss..._

After everything that had happened recently and even now that Quil and I seemed to be on the same page about wanting to possibly be together, it was still confusing. But maybe that's okay. Nothing good ever comes easily right?

"God Claire what's going to happen when the whole pack finds out about you two?!"

Right. This was definitely NOT gonna be easy.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Oh my gosh guys I totally suck : Sorry to keep everyone waiting for so freaking long! I just moved to a completely different state to start grad school and I'm like stressed to the max. I'm super far away from all my family/friends for the first time really soo yea it's really weird. I've missed writing and all y'all though so I'm happy to at least get an update out! Apologies for lapse in quality/excitement level with this chap...I figured you would rather me just get this chap out so it's not my best. I hope to do better on the next one. And THANKS SO MUCH to everyone who has been reading/reviewing so far! I love you guys :) I hope some of you continue to stick with me despite my terrible wait times haha. Take care!**


	22. Fall For You

**OH HI THERE. This chapter is kinda looong...hope that's cool :D**

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 22<strong>

_But hold your breath  
>Because tonight will be the night<br>That I will fall for you over again  
>Don't make me change my mind<br>Or I won't live to see another day  
>I swear it's true<br>Because a girl like you is impossible to find  
>You're impossible to find<em>

-Fall for You by Secondhand Serenade

A week had passed since Quil and I had started covertly "seeing each other" and I'll admit, I was starting to get a little worried that he was never going to make it official. Not that I didn't enjoy the lack of scrutiny that would surely change once the pack found out, but I guess I always imagined proclaiming our undying love for one another at one of the bonfires or something ridiculous like that.

_Just be happy that Quil wants to be together duh._

I sighed resignedly, willing myself to stop thinking about stupid things like Quil not actually wanting to date me…

_Fuck what if he really doesn't want to date me? Maybe I'm just a fling?_

"STOP IT," I berated myself out loud, hoping it would slow down my ride on the crazy train. There was no point in acting like a low self-esteem loser when just yesterday Quil had told me I was 'amazing.' Sure, it may have been after I made him waffles for dinner, but still…the boy was hooked.

"Claire?!" My sister's voice echoed from down the hallway, abruptly interrupting my thoughts. "Quil's here!"

_Crap, he's early._

"Coming!"

I grabbed a sweater out of my closet and quickly glanced at myself in the mirror before rushing out to meet my "non-boyfriend" in the living room. Despite knowing that he was into me now, seeing him standing there waiting for me still caused my stomach to flip flop.

"Took you long enough," Quil teased with his signature grin.

"You're early," I quipped back, but started moving toward him all the same. "Just couldn't wait to see me, could you?"

Quil's grin widened. "Damn. You've figured me out Claire-bear."

I was finally close enough to touch him now and reached up to lace my arms around his neck. Before I could move in to kiss him however, a long sigh sounded from the kitchen.

"Could you guys take your flirting elsewhere? It's kind of sickening," Riley's amused voice called out, resulting in Quil and I immediately jumping apart. I couldn't help but scowl as my sister sauntered into the living room with a devilish grin on her face.

"Sooo…" Riley crooned in a knowing tone of voice, "What's the plan for tonight? Dinner? Movie? Some other secret activity?"

I narrowed my eyes at her threateningly. "We're just hanging out."

"Sure. Just make sure you _hang out _only until 10 because I'm pretty sure there's school tomorrow."

Quil chuckled from behind me obviously catching on to the fact that Riley was totally aware of our dating arrangement. "Don't worry, I'll make sure she's home then. I know how much she _loves_ school."

_Jerk._

"I hate you both," I grumbled, moving around Quil to slip some shoes on. Quil and Riley joked at my expense for another minute before I dragged my sexy wolf man out the door to begin our date.

"So you still wana do the Truck Stop for dinner?" Quil asked me as we sped along the tree-lined road into Forks.

"What? I thought we were going to Formaggio's?!" I exclaimed incredulously and threw him a sharp look. When he busted out laughing though I knew I was just getting teased once again.

_Do I have 'gullible' written across my forehead or something?_

"You're pushing it today you know that?" I teased back while simultaneously poking him in his rock hard abs. I was rewarded with a sunny smile that warmed me to the core. Quil was just so effin cute.

We arrived at the small Italian restaurant in Forks after a relatively short drive and soon were seated at a comfortable booth in the back. Quil ordered about half of the items off of the menu while I stuck with a single plate of baked ziti that I knew was totes not weight watchers appropriate! Oh wait, I never do that dieting shitttt.

It only took the waitress a few minutes before she came back with a basket of warm breadsticks that we both eagerly attacked. In between bites of delicious, buttery goodness I eyed Quil's imposing form seated across the table from me. He looked adorably content chowing down on a breadstick that looked tiny in his huge hand.

"What are you looking at?" Quil asked after he caught me staring at him like a love-sick idiot.

"_You_."

"That must be exciting."

I nodded, still openly checking him out. "It is. You're like having a relationship with that breadstick."

That earned a laugh from Quil, who then proceeded to flick a straw wrapper in my direction, successfully hitting me in the face.

"Don't tell me you're jealous of a baked good Claire..." He teased, raising an eyebrow, "You know you're the only one for me."

_Awww._

I felt my face warming under his stare that had suddenly gotten a bit intense, but I tried not to appear overly pleased with his words. Getting compared to a breadstick wasn't exactly the definition of romance.

"I don't know," I mused, "I've never seen you look at me like you looked at that bread…"

Quil nodded seriously. "True. You may have to settle for being second best. But at least you're alive and not floating around in someone's stomach acids."

"Ew gross Quil!"

He laughed again and shrugged, obviously not finding anything remotely wrong with his choice of words. We continued to talk and laugh until the waitress returned with our meals that she seemed to be having trouble balancing due to the sheer number of dishes Quil had requested. Poor gal.

"This is the best pasta I've ever had," Quil mumbled after a few bites and I eyed him skeptically.

_Not likely._

"That's because you haven't tried the baked ziti. It's awesome! Here, take some."

I held my fork out in offering and he dutifully took a bite while I waited for his reaction. Of course it was just as I had expected.

"You weren't kidding. That's freakin delicious!""

"Duh Quil," I drawled, batting his hand away before he could snag more of _my _pasta, "I always got ziti and you purposefully never did so you could be a brat and steal a bunch of mine. Remember?"

Quil's grin faltered for a moment and the stupidity of my words hit me like a wrecking ball. Of course he didn't fucking remember! Everything remotely tied to me and our time together was gone now and I still needed to accept that.

"Uh I'm…I didn't mean to…" I stuttered, trying to backtrack before he had to respond.

"It's fine Claire," Quil interrupted me. "You don't have to feel bad about remembering things. I mean, yea _I_ don't remember, but I really wish I did."

"You do?"

Quil looked at me like I was crazy. "Of course. Why wouldn't I want to remember?"

_Well maybe you're better off without all the imprinting crap…_

I didn't say any of that obviously and I knew Quil's question was just rhetorical, but I couldn't help, but feel a little guilty. All this time now and he still didn't remember. Plus I hadn't mentioned anything about the imprint.

"Don't over-think it Claire," Quil was suddenly assuring me with a tentative smile. "I still feel like I've known you forever. It's almost weird how that worked out so easily."

_Oh geeze._

"Yea…weird…" I mumbled, looking down at my plate. His words were actually having the opposite effect than he had intended, making me feel even guiltier that I hadn't explained our supernatural bond.

_Shit._

Quil was staring at me curiously and had just begun to open his mouth when the waitress returned with our check. I was saved for now.

"So do you want to walk over to that candy store place?" Quil asked me as we exited the restaurant. At the thought of chocolate and other delicious treats I immediately perked up.

_I'll take ya to the candy shop…I let ya lick the lollipop…go head boy don't you—okayyy probably should not be doing my 50 Cent impression right now._

"Yes! That sounds amazing!"

Quil grinned down at me and I felt my heart flutter beneath my ribs. "Great. Let's go Claire-bear."

_Eeeeeek!_

Suddenly Quil's warm hand brushed against my own and then he went all out and intertwined our fingers. I smiled up at him shyly, acting like a 13-year-old girl holding hands for the first time, but I didn't care. Walking hand in hand with Quil in the dusky twilight was making me feel like the luckiest person in the world.

After our little excursion, we decided to call it a night and walked back to Quil's truck to begin the drive to La Push. To my surprise, Quil became fairly quiet for the most part, only responding to my rambling about how wonderful the chocolate peanut-butter cups had been with a random grunt here and there.

_Is he bored of me already?_

"What's wrong?" I asked him after a long stretch of silence that I couldn't keep from interrupting. Quil glanced over at me like he had just now noticed my presence in the truck.

"Oh sorry. Nothing. I'm just thinking about…stuff."

"Like what kind of _stuff_?" I pressed, growing uneasy. What if he was flashing back to the awkward moment at dinner when I had brought up his memory loss again?

"Y'know. Just random things," Quil answered cryptically causing me to worry even more. Was he trying to hint that he was getting tired of going out with me or that he just wasn't feeling a spark between us?

_OH MY GOD I knew this was too good to be true!_

"Did you like not have a good time?" I questioned a bit breathlessly. "Because if you didn't and you're getting bored or something then you know I won't be mad right?"

Quil tore his eyes away from the road to regard me and when I saw his complete confusion I heaved an inner sigh of relief.

"Claire, seriously, I had a great time."

"Oh okay. That's uh…that's good."

_So eloquent. _

The familiar driveway to my house appeared ahead and soon we were pulling up in front of the worn, wooden building. Quil quickly shut off the ignition, but made no move to get out of the car.

"Sorry I sort of zoned out back there," he muttered. "I didn't mean to act like I didn't have a good time or anything, but I was kind of preoccupied."

I nodded, but had no clue what he was talking about. "Oh, with what?"

"I wanted to ask you if you wanted to ah be my…well girlfriend…"

_Holy tits._

I stared at him in shock for a few moments, while Quil's eyes remained trained on my face, waiting for some sort of reaction. Then it finally hit me that Quil wanted _me_ to be his bona fide GF and I couldn't contain the ridiculous grin that took over.

"Of course I will," I assured him, teetering dangerously on the edge of a happy giggle fit. "Um yea. That would pretty much rock my world."

Quil shook his head and laughed, but I was pleased to note that his hands had already started moving toward me and were now being used to pull me close.

"Good choice," he told me in a huskier voice than before and I braced myself for his lips to connect with mine. I was not disappointed as Quil bent down to slowly kiss me in a way that turned my legs to jelly. I ran my fingers through his short hair, marveling at how soft it felt and nipped at his bottom lip earning a soft growl from Quil.

"I should…ah…probably get back…" I mumbled as his lips left mine to trail down my exposed neck.

_Wait why do I need to go back again?_

"Mmhmm," Quil agreed in between kisses, but failed to show any signs of stopping. Maybe it was the new designation of being Quil's girlfriend or simply being alone in the dark together, but things seemed much more hot and heavy than usual. Regardless, I needed to focus and break it up before Riley noticed how long we'd been out here and had a 'mom moment.'

"For real dude," I mumbled trying to disentangle myself from the heaven that was Quil's arms. "Riley is gonna call us out in like 2.5 if I don't go now."

Quil sighed, but nodded his agreement, only pulling me down for one more deep kiss before he released me.

"I'll see you tomorrow then," he assured me and I had to combat the urge to jump him again. Instead I opted for opening the passenger door and standing beside it to bid him goodnight.

"You most definitely _will_ see me tomorrow boyfrienddd!" I crooned at him exaggeratedly and then ran off toward the house before he could make fun of my weirdness. We waved dorkily at each other one last time and then I let myself into the living room where Riley was stretched out on the couch.

"Oh my god I'm Quil's girlfriend!" I squealed, throwing myself on her rather forcefully. She let out a yelp of pain and tried to push me off albeit with little success.

"Geeze Claire, try and kill me why don't you?"

I only laughed and burrowed my face into her side. "Quil asked me out…Quil asked me out…Quil asked me—"

Riley pushed my face away from her and sighed. "Okay fine. _Congratulations. _You and Quil are finally legit now. I forget you've only been waiting since you were what—2 years old?—for this."

My smile turned into a half-hearted scowl. "It wasn't _like that_ you grouch, but yes this is perhaps the best day of my 18 years of life. I can go die in peace now."

"Always so dramatic," Riley muttered from above my head, but I could tell she was grinning despite her best efforts. "Now can you please go to bed or something? I don't want you to oversleep and miss your alarm like you did last week."

I groaned and forced myself to get up from the couch where I wanted to stay. "Fine, but I probably won't sleep anyway from all the excitement!"

"Sure. I give it 10 minutes tops before you're face-down on your pillow, asleep."

"Whatever. Love you sista-friend!" I chimed as I skipped down the hallway to my room.

"Love you too!"

I refuse to verify whether I sleep face-down or not, but Riley may have been right about that whole 10 minutes to fall asleep thing. The next morning came much too quickly and before long I was wasting away in the dreary classrooms of La Push High, waiting for the bell to ring and signal my freedom.

_Dear god I hate school._

Luckily the bell did ring and I managed to escape high school hell before my brain turned into an unsightly puddle of goo. After bidding goodbye to Irina, I took off across the parking lot toward Seth's SUV and hopped inside declaring a cheery 'hello.' To my surprise however, three male voices answered my greeting rather than just one.

"What's crack-a-lackin Triple C?!" Collin shouted from the backseat where he and Brady were seated.

"You're lookin pretty chipper today!" Brady added before I could respond. I glanced over at Seth who simply shrugged good-naturedly.

_Is it wolf field trip day or something?_

"They wanted to get out of helping Emily get stuff together for the bonfire tonight," he explained, gesturing toward the two younger wolves. "I'm sure Sam will make them pay for it later."

Collin made an exasperated sound in his throat. "Well then you can just calmly explain to dear old alpha that we had a special errand to run and—"

"I don't think picking me up from school counts as a _special errand_ Collin," I interrupted with a giggle. "But anyway, I didn't know we were having a bonfire tonight?"

Seth nodded as he began steering us out of the parking lot and onto the road. "Yep. It's a last minute kind of thing, but the weather is so clear today that we figured it'd be a great night for it."

I glanced outside, noticing the lack of customary drizzle and voiced my agreement.

"You can uh invite _friends_ to the bonfire if you want to…like they're more than welcome to come…" Brady awkwardly tried to appear nonchalant, but I knew he just wanted me to invite Irina, whom he had some weird ongoing flirtation with.

"Suuure," I drawled, turning around to smirk at him. "I can text Irina if you want. I'm sure she'd love to have her boobs stared at for another evening."

Collin and Seth busted out laughing while Brady scowled at me in what I'm sure was supposed to be a threatening way, but failed completely.

"Oooh diss bro," Collin called out, still chuckling. "Who knew lil Claire-bear could be so harsh?"

"She's just jealous that Quil doesn't stare at _her_ like that," Brady mumbled and I couldn't resist the urge to pester him some more.

"Oh please, Quil's just not creepy about it like you are."

Brady scoffed. "Righhhht 'cause pining after a toddler is _so_ not creepy…"

I went silent as the tone immediately shifted from jokey and fun to plain-out awkward. Brady had definitely taken that one way too far.

Collin let out a soft whistle. "Dude, not cool."

I heard Brady clear his throat from the backseat, but I refused to turn around and face the jerk.

"Claire? Dammit, I didn't uh mean it like—"

"Just can it Brady," Seth chastised in an uncharacteristically stern voice. "She knows you're just an asshole sometimes."

"Yea Claire," Collin piped up, "_Total_ _asshole._ One might go as far to say douchebag, jerk-off, perhaps even dickhead or—"

Seth cut him off with a sharp look, but his stupidity had done the trick. I was practically smiling now despite my lingering annoyance with Brady.

"I'm sorry Claaaire," Brady whined and I gave him the evil eye from over my shoulder. He obviously took that as a positive sign however and began poking me in the arm every five seconds.

"Don't be mad! I'm just jealous that _I_ don't have an awesome, amazing imprint like Quil does! I mean even though _he _doesn't exactly like know that right now…uh...shit I mean…"

_Jesus Christ!_

"Seriously man, just stop while you're behind," Collin looked at him disbelievingly. It was kind of ridiculous how many times Brady could succeed in sticking his foot in his mouth. He refused to heed Collin's advice however and continued on with his poorly thought-out speech.

"What I _meant_ is that he totally remembers you like in his…I don't know…somewhere deep down, but he just doesn't get it yet? So that's why he hasn't y'know come around yet and asked you out—"

_I cannot take this anymore!_

"Oh my frickin god Brady, Quil DID ask me out! I'm his girlfriend now! You happy?!"

After a moment of silence, I realized I was panting slightly after my mild outburst and that all of the guys were staring at me wide-eyed.

_Fuck. Oops._

"Wait WHAT?!" Collin practically screamed from the backseat, clawing onto my shoulder like some freakish little monkey. "Are you shittin us right now?'

Now that I had spilled the beans it seemed like there was no other option, but to tell the truth. "Nope. It's true," I confirmed quietly as an embarrassing blush began to bloom across my cheeks. Collin and Brady let out some weird cheer thing, while Seth mumbled something that sounded like "it's about time," before grinning over at me happily.

"Aww guys, Claire-bear's in loooove," Collin sang in a sappy voice that made me even more embarrassed. "So when's the wedding? I always pictured you guys having a beach ceremony and then a tent for the reception and…"

"What the fuck dude?"

"_What_?! Somebody's gotta think ahead!"

I sighed, wondering for the millionth time why I put up with them. "There is no wedding okay? We are just _dating._ That's it. End of story. Not a huge deal."

Brady and Collin looked at each with devilish smiles before Brady decided to voice what they obviously both were thinking. "Righhht Miss I-Have-Been-Dreaming-Of-Dating-Quil-My-Entire-Life. Not a big deal, my ass."

That got a laugh even out of Seth and I tried to hide my grin by watching the scenery pass by the window."Okay fine. I'm like freaking out about it. Just don't tell Quil."

"They won't," Seth assured me as we pulled up to Sam and Emily's house. I was supposed to hangout and play with Emily's son after I finished up with school for the day, but now I was sure I would get roped into making food for the bonfire.

"Can you guys not make a big deal out of this please?" I pleaded after Collin and Brady expressed how excited they were to tell everyone in the pack about my new relationship status. "I don't want Quil to think I blabbed on about it like some ridiculous girly girl."

Collin grinned, hopping out of the SUV at the same time I did. "You know we have to tell everyone eventually! They'll see it in our minds the minute we phase…might as well just spread the good news right off the bat!"

"But Quil might—"

"Operation QUICKSAND has officially succeeded and can now be terminated. See ya Claire!" Collin interrupted me before I could finish and took off around the back of the house with Brady hot on his heels. Seth must have noticed my defeated posture because he came over and placed a comforting hand on my shoulder.

"Sorry Bear, looks like the idiot twins might get their way this time. But don't worry, I'm sure Quil won't care."

_Or he may just dump me on the spot._

I gave him a weak smile in response and meandered into the house where I knew my Aunt would be busy and needing help. Not surprisingly I found her in the kitchen shuffling back and forth between assembling shish kabobs and checking on something in the oven that smelled rather heavenly. Upon seeing me, she breathed a sigh of relief and directed me toward the shish kabob table.

"Can I put pineapple on some of these?" I asked after I had been instructed on proper assembly technique.

"Sure, that sounds yummy Claire. How was school?"

_Fuckin awful._

"Great," I lied, skewering a piece of chicken with more force than necessary. "I'm excited for the bonfire though. We haven't had one in a while."

"Yea I thought so too that's why—"

Suddenly the back door banged open, scaring the living daylights out of both of us. My initial thought had been VAMPIRE ATTACK, but luckily it was just Paul and Jared grinning like a pair of fools.

"So I hear Claire-bear finally got herself a boyfriend?" Paul teased, coming over to ruffle my hair. I pushed his hand away and tried to avoid looking at Emily who was gaping at me in shock.

"Claire you-you what? Who?"

"Who?" Jared scoffed, also giving in to the very annoying urge to pat me on the head. Seriously what was with wolves and hair ruffling?! "It's _Quil_ obviously! Who else?"

Emily's eyes bugged out almost cartoonishly and I stifled a laugh. "But Quil doesn't remember…I mean I thought you two were just friends right now?"

"Well, it kind of just happened. I don't know," I admitted sheepishly under their watchful stares. Jared and Paul both chuckled, but Emily only continued to stare at me. It was unsettling, considering I thought she of all people would have been thrilled for this to happen.

"So you still haven't told him about the imprint?"

_Way to be a buzkill Aunt Em._

I shook my head slowly, avoiding her searching eyes. "Um no, not exactly."

"_Claire_…" She began, but I never got to hear what she was planning on saying. Collin and Brady barged in at that very moment and pulled me away from the table declaring that I needed to come outside immediately. I allowed myself to be dragged along partly because I didn't want to be accosted anymore by Emily and partly because I couldn't really stop a wolf on a mission even if I wanted to.

"What's so important that I need to come out here?" I whined as the backyard came into view. My eyes focused first on the gaggle of children running around screaming and chasing each other and then on the three giant men standing nearby.

_Oh_.

Jacob, Embry, and Quil had obviously just arrived and Collin and Brady were eager to see how I would react in the presence of my new boyfriend. Before I could plan out a course of action, Collin shoved me forward so that I stumbled out in front of the group.

"Hey guys, look who it is!" He announced loudly, making me cringe. The three of them stared at me, looking amused as I gave an awkward wave in their direction. Quil and I made eye contact and he smiled at me in a way that made me blush.

"C'mon Quil," Collin sighed dramatically, "Aren't you going to like kiss her or something?"

Jake and Embry laughed, but didn't seem at all surprised by Collin's statement, leading me to believe that they already knew about Quil and me. Not like it mattered, since Collin and Brady seemed determined to announce it to every single person in the pack as quickly as possible.

"She's waiting," Collin continued, giving me another nudge that unfortunately sent me stumbling again.

"Give it a rest Collin," I muttered, hoping Quil didn't suddenly change his mind and flee the scene. To my utter delight however, Quil chose to move toward me until he was close enough to grab my hand in his.

"Hey," he greeted softly, interlacing our fingers together. After a second, his gaze swept over my head until he was looking at Collin. "Push my girlfriend again and I'll kick your ass."

_OMG!_

A chorus of "ooohs" rang out as Collin tried to go on about being tough enough to take Quil, but I didn't even pay attention to the noises around me. Quil had stood up for me, had verified that I was his girlfriend, and was now holding my hand in front of everyone. I was practically overflowing with happiness.

"Claire?" Quil was suddenly staring down at me and I realized I had zoned out.

"Huh?"

"I think Emily wants your help again with the shish kabobs."

I nodded, reluctant to move away from Quil even if it was only a short distance away. "Well okay. I guess I should go inside then…"

Quil smiled at me before bending down to kiss me on the nose. "Put pineapple on some of the kabobs for me, okay?"

"Deal," I responded with what I'm sure was a besotted expression. We were so damn alike with our pineapple preferences. If that wasn't love I didn't know what was.

Ignoring the catcalls from some of the guys, I skipped off to the kitchen with a markedly improved mood and a renewed fervor for shish kabob making. Luckily Rachel and Kim had arrived and were chatty enough that Emily didn't have a chance to bring up imprinting again, despite the fact that I knew it was a valid point. I just didn't know how to handle it right now and felt panicked thinking about how Quil might react to the news.

_Ugh just forget about it and enjoy the rest of the day._

It was easy enough to take my own advice, and soon I was focusing on having a good time with everyone. The bonfire started once the food was finished and the sun began to retreat below the treetops around Sam and Emily's property. It felt just like it always had with the whole pack together, talking, laughing, and remembering funny stories that never seemed to get boring despite how many times they were retold.

The only difference from old times was that now when I leaned up against Quil, I didn't have to pretend it was just because I was cold and needed to be warmed up. Now I could trace patterns on his forearm with my finger and delight when he gave the tiniest of shivers under my touch. Maybe it should have been more awkward, but it seemed so natural and right to be with Quil this way that I simply savored being with him and ignored any of the good-natured teasing from the pack.

_I know they're happy for us anyway._

After the bonfire ended, Quil drove me back to my place and I enjoyed a few lingering kisses with him before I went to bed a very happy girl. My good mood continued to last for the rest of the week as I settled into to really being Quil's girlfriend and we spent most of our time together.

After school on Friday however, I went over to Sam and Emily's again to make up for the play date with Grayson that I had missed out on the day of the bonfire. Quil was helping Embry and Jake work on some car thing that I didn't remotely understand, so it was the perfect chance for me to hang out with my crazy little cousin who pretty much adored me. The kid has good taste, what can I say?

"Hello!" I shouted when I walked into the living room of the Uley house. "It's Claire!"

"In here." I heard Emily's voice drift from the kitchen, prompting me to join her. She was seated at the table looking over some coupons in the newspaper and barely looked up when I sat down next to her.

"Where's Grayson?" I asked, not noticing him in the vicinity.

"He had a doctor's appointment today and the office is running late. Sam should be back with him soon though."

I nodded and reached across the table to grab an oatmeal cookie off of the plate where they were piled high. Emily seemed strangely quiet and my reaction was to occupy myself in any way that I could and that included eating.

"Soo…" I mumbled, after a few bites. "Is Grayson like sick or something?"

Emily's eyes remained focused on the advertisement in front her as she answered. "No, it's just a routine check-up. Nothing to worry about."

"Oh good to hear."

She nodded, but didn't speak any further. Honestly, it was really starting to creep me out. Emily was usually one of the sweetest, friendliest people around and it felt like she was giving me the cold shoulder.

_Is she pissed at me or something?_

"Is everything…okay?" I accosted quietly and she paused in her coupon clipping. Finally, she raised her eyes to look at me and I was surprised by the seriousness in her gaze.

"Yes. I mean...no, not exactly," she answered me after a moment's pause. "I guess I'm just worried Claire."

"About what?"

"About you and Quil."

I stared at her blankly, not comprehending the reason behind this conversation topic. "Um okay…well why are you worried about us?"

"Well for one, he still hasn't regained his memory and who knows what's going through his head exactly," she began and then drew in a deep breath. "And two, you still haven't told him about the imprint."

_Oh. This again. _

I let the weight of her words sink in before I responded truthfully. "I know I should tell him Aunt Em, I know, believe me. And I've come close to doing it so many times, it's just…it's just _so hard_ to lay that on him when what we have right now is still so fragile. I really don't want to mess it up y'know?"

Emily's face softened with compassion and she reached across the table to pat my hand. "I understand Claire-bear, but don't you think it's unfair to keep it from him? Especially now that he seems so attached to you?"

"I know," I mumbled miserably. This was definitely not how I had pictured the afternoon going. "But he's going to get overwhelmed by it all. I mean, imprinting is serious shi—_business_. It's supposed to be...forever."

"It _is_ forever Claire. And I know his accident won't change that, but he might just need some help from you to get him to understand how deep of a connection you guys really have. If he knows about the imprint then—"

"But then he won't be able to just date me like a normal guy!" I interrupted her, getting exasperated at the direction the conversation was headed. "Can't I see if he really likes me before I drop the I-bomb on him?"

"But _Claire,_ he does like you," Emily continued on undeterred, "All you need to do is verify to him that what he feels isn't just some normal attraction, it's fate."

_Seriously?_

"Well fate screwed us over once, so forgive me for not trusting the imprint spirits to do their job properly this time around," I spit back rather spitefully. I immediately regretted my tone when I saw Emily's expression falter and I forced myself to stare anywhere else to avoid seeing her disappointment.

_Dammit now I'm just being a bitch._

"I get it Claire. I really do," Emily's gentle voice forced my eyes back up to hers. "But you're wrong about this."

I suddenly felt more child-like and alone than ever. "What if I tell him and he doesn't want to be with me anymore? He was able to forget about the imprint and maybe that's…what he truly wanted…deep down."

"I'm not going to let you believe these lies that you've made up for yourself," Emily told me urgently, "Quil loves you. Quil's _always_ loved you. You're his _imprint_ Claire."

"_What_?"

A masculine voice suddenly echoed throughout the room and I flinched in surprise. To my complete and utter horror, Quil's large body was standing in the doorway and neither Emily or I had apparently noticed him enter the house at all.

_This cannot be happening…_

"How long have you been there?" I questioned in a breathless voice. Quil's eyes bore into my own with an almost overwhelming intensity as he searched them for answers.

"You're my _imprint_?"

* * *

><p><strong>AN: So the Imprint is OUT. Phew. And yay I finally freaking updated! Sorry this is becoming a trend with me, but I'm trying I swear. Thanks for all your sweet, encouraging reviews. And now without further ado….THOUGHTS ON BREAKING DAWN PART 2 (beware spoilers): OMG I haven't laughed so hard in a looong time. There were so many things to make fun of: 1. Computer animated creepyass baby Renesmee 2. Jacob staring at little Renesmee in like every scene with a "yeea I'm gonna have sex with you someday" expression. 3. Bella's burst of light orgasm moment. 4. Aro's demented laugh…actually basically <em>anything<em> Aro did. 5. The! Final! Battle! SERIOUSLY when Carlisle's head got ripped off I screamed and then launched into a psycho fit of laughter for the rest of the movie. I mean they totally got me! That entire scene was maybe the best thing I've ever seen in my life. The movie went from being pretty lame-o to awesome and hysterical…too bad they didn't let that actually happen. Stephenie M. really did need some more gore (childbirth aside) and death in that book. Jus sayin. Anywhooo LOVE YOU GUYS! xoxo**


	23. Gravity

**Chapter 23**

_Set me free, leave me be._

_I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity._

_Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I'm supposed to be._

_But you're on to me and all over me._

-Gravity by Sara Bareilles

"You're my _imprint_?"

_Oh my god. Oh my god. _

This had to be some awful nightmare that I was about to wake up from because Quil couldn't really be standing there, staring at me, waiting for answers. I closed my eyes for a second hoping he somehow might disappear, but when I reopened them, nothing had changed.

_Shit shit shit._

With a shaky breath, I willed myself to speak and explain the situation.

"Quil…I can…I can explain," I began in a voice barely above a whisper. Quil's eyes narrowed in on my face, still watching and waiting. "It's not so simple. I mean it's…I'm…"

"Just answer the question Claire," Quil interrupted in a chillingly calm tone. There was no way out of this now and both he and I knew it.

_Well, here goes everything…_

Swallowing thickly, I allowed the answer to drift up to my lips at last. "Yes. I'm your…your imprint."

Quil stared at me for a few long moments more and then suddenly turned around and left the kitchen without saying another word. Next to me, I heard Emily gasp and attempt to speak, but I heard nothing as I was already rising from my chair and attempting to run after him.

"Quil!" I shouted, stumbling out the front door and down the porch steps. "Quil, wait!"

He was already half way across the yard, but my yelling seemed to be distracting enough to slow him down. I capitalized on this and full out sprinted until I could grab onto one of his arms. Quil immediately shrugged me off, but I clutched the edge of his t-shirt and hung on until he turned around angrily.

"Quil please let me—"

"Dammit Claire!" Quil pushed my fingers away again and this time I let my hand fall back to my side. He looked so torn up and confused that my plan to apologize just seemed futile now.

"I…I'm so, so sorry," I began, but Quil held up a hand to stop me.

"You're _sorry_? For what? For lying to me this whole time? Or for playing along as I wondered why I was so drawn to you?" Quil let out a humorless chuckle that made me wince. "It must have been so entertaining to watch me look through all those photos of us together, asking you dumbass questions about your birthdays and why I had all your fucking photos around my place—"

"It wasn't like that Quil! I _wanted_ to tell you about the imprint, I swear!"

Quil shook his head, ignoring my desperate pleas to listen. "Well it sure as hell doesn't seem like it."

"It's just really complicated," I tried to assure him, cringing when he looked away from me. "I wanted you to know, but then I-I _didn't_ want you to know at the same time…"

My last statement caused a change to go over Quil's face and his eyes flashed dangerously. "Why not? Were you trying to get out of the imprint or someth—"

I moved so quickly to clutch his arm that I barely noticed myself doing it. "No! That's not it at all. I just didn't want you to feel forced or stuck with me. You were confused enough as it was."

My hands clenched nervously at my sides as I fought the urge to reach up and smooth away the tense wrinkle between Quil's eyebrows. He was regarding me with a strange look that bordered on confused, even incredulous.

"You…you thought that?"

"I thought I was doing the right thing. I didn't mean to lie to you Quil. I didn't," I replied earnestly, hoping I would appear as sincere as I felt.

Quil however, only sighed and looked away from me. "It just changes everything."

_Ouch._

"But why?" I whispered in a choked voice. "It doesn't have to!"

"But it does Claire. You should have told me."

I nodded, knowing that he was right and hating myself for it. I should have told him. Instead I had been selfish, thinking only of my own happiness and the possibility of Quil falling for me without the imprint.

"I know," I told him, my voice sounding dejected and frail. "I should have been more honest and I'm truly sorry. But if you let me, I promise I'll make things right. I'll do _anything_."

Quil rubbed his face with both hands before letting out a long, weary exhale that didn't sound very promising. Gone was the anger that had boiled through him earlier, replaced instead by mistrust and disillusionment. It was so much worse than the yelling.

"Claire," Quil finally spoke, "I don't think I can be…around you right now."

_Oh no._

His words caused my heart to fall down to the soles of my feet, landing with an agonizing thump. Sucking in a shallow breath, I reached out to him hoping that I could change his mind if I could be close to him again.

"Wait, please I can explain this better. I can—"

Quil brushed me off, backing away as I advanced toward him. "No Claire. I can't do this right now."

"But…"

"I have to go," he told me seriously and before I could stop him, he was walking into the nearby woods, out of sight.

_Wow. _

My body felt numb as I stood there staring at the place where Quil had disappeared, trying to comprehend what had just happened. I vaguely recognized the sound of my Aunt's voice hesitantly calling out to me, but I didn't turn around to answer.

_Shit. Shit._

"Claire? Honey, are you alright?"

Emily was close now, cautiously attempting to approach me and I finally snapped out of my catatonic stare.

"Um…he…Quil just..." My voice faded slowly as the meaning of what happened started to sink in. "Quil left. He doesn't want to see me."

I covered my face with my hands and pressed my fingers against my eyelids until strange patterns flashed in front of my closed eyes.

"Claire?" Emily questioned tentatively, probably concerned by my strange reaction. I'm sure I freaked her out even more when I let out a slightly hysterical chuckle that sounded scary even to my own ears.

"Oh my god I really fucked this up didn't I? He's never going to want to talk to me again."

It was a sign of how worried Emily was that she didn't even bother to reprimand me for my inappropriate language and instead tried to assure me that Quil didn't hate me, but was just confused and upset. I barely heard a word of it.

"Um can I just go now?" I mumbled after a few minutes of agonizing advice from her. "I need to like do something…I don't know what yet, but something."

Emily looked confused, but thankfully didn't pry further and offered to drive me home which I readily accepted. Both of us were silent as Emily turned off of the Uley drive onto the main road and I secretly hoped it would remain that way for the rest of the short trip. Only a few seconds later however, Emily's phone started ringing and she sighed before grabbing it from the console to answer.

"Hey," she breathed distractedly, but I could still hear the tenderness in her voice indicating it was Sam on the other end.

_Must be nice to have an imprint that actually worked out…_

"What?!" Emily's frantic exclamation caused me to jump and I looked over at her for an explanation. "It was that close?"

"What was close?" I interrupted, thoroughly confused and frightened by her panicked expression. She only glanced at me though, still absorbed in her conversation with Sam.

"Yes, of course we'll go there. Claire's with me right now and we were driving over to her place anyway so we're close."

_What the hell?_

I remained silent as she inquired about Grayson's safety and then said goodbye to Sam, but immediately bombarded her with questions after she hung up.

"What was that about? Where are we going?"

"To Quil and Embry's," she responded calmly, but I could tell she was worried by the way she gripped the steering wheel. "There's been a vampire sighting nearby and Sam just wants to make sure we're somewhere safe."

At the word _vampire_ my blood ran cold and I suppressed the urge to physically shiver. My last encounter with an unfriendly bloodsucker had been the scariest experience of my life and wasn't something I hoped to repeat anytime soon.

"Is anyone hurt?" I whispered, momentarily paralyzed by fear.

"No Claire, no one's hurt. Collin and Brady were patrolling and chased it off of the reservation."

_Thank god._

"What about Riley? She's at work and—"

"Sam is there at the clinic for Grayson's check-up remember?" Emily reminded me, "She's fine."

I let out a shaky sigh of relief. "Oh okay…that's good."

Emily nodded, clearly lost in her own worried thoughts while I tried to digest the clusterfuck that today was turning out to be. First the devastating imprint reveal with Quil and now vampire drama; it couldn't get worse right?

"We're here Claire."

The car came to a stop and I glanced up, realizing where we were.

_Oh wait it can get worse…Quil's probably here and he hates me. _

I reluctantly followed my Aunt up the steps to Quil's front door and did my best to hide behind her as she let herself into the house. Peeking around her shoulder like the scaredy cat I was, I was relieved to only see Embry standing behind the couch regarding us curiously.

"Are you afraid a leech is in here Claire?" he asked me with a playful grin, "You look a little freaked."

"Where's Quil?" I asked nervously, completely ignoring Embry's teasing.

"He's not here. I thought he was going to Emily's place, but seeing as you're not there, he's probably on his way back."

"What?! But the vampire could be out there and he can't phase and…" I trailed off helplessly as visions of a defenseless Quil walking around the vampire-ridden woods suddenly assaulted my brain. Emily placed a comforting hand on my shoulder that did little to ease my guilt.

"Don't worry Claire," Embry began hesitantly, still unaware of the reason behind my anxious mood. "The guys took care of things and that leech should be long gone by now. Sam just wanted to make sure you both were completely safe…you know how he worries."

I shook my head. "You don't understand. Quil is probably losing it right now and it's all my fault."

"What are you talking about?"

"He found out…about the imprint."

Embry's eyes widened in surprise, but his natural introversion prevented him from showing too much of a reaction. Instead he stood still for a moment processing the information before letting out a small sigh.

"Well you knew it was going to happen sooner or later Claire. It had to."

"But it was terrible how he found out!" I objected miserably. "He overhead us talking about it and he was really upset."

Embry moved around the couch until he stood close enough to pat me on the head. "It's okay Claire-bear. We both know Quil can be a drama queen at first, but he gets over things soon enough. I'll go find him and try to explain stuff if you want."

_And this is why Embry is my bestie!_

"Would you? I'm kind of worried about him wandering around out there so soon after the vampire thing."

"Of course. Seth just got here so you guys sit tight for a little while."

My normal hearing hadn't picked up on anything, but sure enough Seth burst in through the back door only a few seconds later. After a brief exchange, Embry jogged outside leaving the three of us alone in the house.

"How are things going out there?" Emily asked him calmly though I could sense the unease lurking beneath her composure. Sam had given up phasing already, but any chance of a fight put her on edge.

"No worries guys," Seth answered with his usual cheerfulness. "Brady and Collin actually did something right for once and chased the creepy dude out of here."

It was almost impossible not to smile when Seth talked, but under the current circumstances I managed it. And dangit, he noticed.

"Uh Claire? A vampire getting run out of La Push is a good thing, okay? You can be happy."

_Gah. Here goes round two of explaining my current misery. _

After describing the situation to a sympathetic Seth, Emily and I stayed at the house for a while until she got word that her husband and son were back at their place. I was surprised that Embry and Quil were still gone, but I figured going to look for them would be a bad idea no matter how desperate I was to talk to Quil again. Instead, I let Emily drive me home and waited for my sister who always seemed to make me feel better.

_She won't be able to fix this mess though. _

I sat down on my bed and played with my phone for a while, even torturing myself by looking at some recent photos I had taken with Quil. Luckily I didn't waste too much time with that however, because my phone rang, effectively scaring the crap of out me.

_It's Embry! _

"Hey what's up?" I greeted him as casually as possible though I was instantly eager for information. Embry's weary intake of breath was telling and I knew what was coming wouldn't be good.

"Well your boyfriend is a little more upset than I would have thought."

_Crap._

"What happened?"

"Let's just say punching was involved. And I was on the receiving end," Embry told me with a dark chuckle. "I'll admit, I didn't help things when I wouldn't leave him alone when he told me to, but I didn't realize he was pissed at _me_."

"Well he shouldn't be! It's our imprint, not yours," I interjected, feeling defensive even as my guilt continued to mount. I mean, I know I lied, but still…Embry didn't have to suffer for it.

"Yea, tell him that. Quil seems to think that everyone was in on it together, especially me since I'm his best friend and I'm so close to you too."

I let out a dramatic groan that made me seem fourteen years old rather than the eighteen year old "adult" I was supposed to be. "I'm sorry Em. This is turning into a fucking werewolf soap opera and it just…y'know _sucks_! Seriously, I think Quil and I may win shittiest imprint of the year at the rate things are going."

I could hear Embry laugh softly on the other end and I buried my face in the pillow. "You think he would answer if I call him?"

"All you can do is try," Embry advised neutrally. "I think he's just really confused right now. I mean, I would be too if I found out my girlfriend was my imprint after trying to figure out what she meant to me all this time."

_And now it might be over completely. _

"Yea," I agreed in a voice half muffled by the pillow. "I guess I'll call him then. The worst he can do is just tell me he hates me, right?"

I was aiming for a jokey tone, but that last bit came out much more pathetic than I would have liked.

"Are you sure you're okay Claire?"

_No. Duh. _

"Definitely. Couldn't be better. I feel like skipping actually."

I could practically hear Embry's eye roll. "_Claire…_"

I sighed heavily. "Fine. I'm fucking distraught, but what else is new? Imprinting kind of does that to you."

"Well at least you're not skipping. You're way too uncoordinated for _that._"

That finally got a laugh out of me and apparently it was satisfactory enough for Embry to let me off the hook and end the phone call. Strangely enough, I actually did feel calmer about calling Quil and I quickly acted before the feeling faded.

_Please pick up…please pick up…_

Four rings later and all traces of calmness were gone.

_Fuck he hates me!_

"Hello?"

_Omg he answered!_

"Uh hi," I responded, sounding weirdly out of breath. "It's Claire."

There was a long pause that I was sure meant Quil had hung up.

"Yea…I know."

_WHY AM I SUCH AN IDIOT OF COURSE HE KNOWS! _

"Good…I mean, I just needed to talk to you about…all of this. If you want to that is."

Again, Quil's response took a painfully long time. "I don't really want to talk Claire."

"Oh, um okay," I answered weakly, already feeling the urge to cry. "Can I just say again that I'm really sorry? No one was trying to hurt you or make you feel like an idiot, it's just what we thought was best—"

"I get it," Quil cut me off, "But it doesn't change how I feel right now. And I just want to be alone."

The betrayal in his voice was hard to hear and I knew there was nothing more I could say at this point.

"Then I won't bother you anymore," I told him, swallowing against a thick, constricted feeling in my throat. "Bye."

I knew he deserved to get the last word more than me, but I hung up before I could hear his response. I couldn't force him to accept my apology nor could I convince him that the imprint didn't matter to me anymore.

The rest of the day passed rather uneventfully; I complained to Riley when she got home and then helped her pack some stuff for the medical conference that the Health Clinic was sending her to in a few days. I wasn't looking forward to being home alone for the week she would be gone, but I wouldn't ruin Riley's plans just because my love life wasn't working out.

Quil didn't contact me the entire weekend, but according to the guys he was avoiding just about everyone. Luckily, the pack was still on high alert due to the vampire sighting and were thus too busy with patrols to worry over me too much. They would mean well, but would just want to talk about Quil and how stupid he was being and how they would talk to him if I wanted…blah blah. I didn't know where I stood with Quil, let alone if I was even his girlfriend anymore. All in all things really sucked.

"You better take care of yourself while I'm gone," Riley warned me as we stood next to her car the following Monday morning.

"You know I'll be fine."

Riley shot me a pointed stare that indicated she didn't agree. "Seriously, if you do something stupid like throw yourself off a cliff because Quil breaks up with you, I will kill you."

"Wouldn't I already be dead if I threw myself off a cliff?"

"Shut up you know what I meant," she brushed off my facetious question and pulled me in for a tight hug. "I love you Bear."

"Love you too. And I already have plans with Irina for tonight, so don't worry about me getting depressed. She won't allow it."

Riley laughed, finally releasing me from the hug and gesturing toward my school that we were parked outside of. "Now get inside there and learn somethin!"

"I can't make any promises!" I yelled over my shoulder as I walked off. I heard her honk twice at me and then she was gone leaving me to face the dreaded institution of learning.

_Ah, High School. We meet again. _

After classes were done for the day, I walked with Irina to her house and enjoyed the distraction of dinner with her family and doing girl things that I wasn't particularly good at like nail painting. I also got to hear about how cool Brady was and saw some of the weird shit that he texts Irina on a regular basis. Apparently a text at two a.m. asking if she liked Taco Bell's new late night menu was somehow charming? Whatever. It must work for them.

"I asked Brady if he knew what Quil was up to since he's being a dick and blowing you off and all he said is that Quil is being emo and he doesn't know. What do you think Claire?"

I looked up into Irina's expectant gaze and shrugged. She couldn't know the specifics of imprinting so I had to be vague.

"I'm sure he has his reasons Irina…don't worry about it."

"If you say so…" She clearly wasn't pleased by my subdued response, but let the subject go anyway. I ended up coming to her place after school the next two days as well and it was nice to be surrounded by a 'normal' family environment for a change. My Aunt Emily insisted on calling me every day however, just in case I needed to talk about how my life was crumbling to pieces without Quil.

"You don't need to tell me about Quil," I informed her during our now customary evening conversation. "I talked to Jake and Nessie yesterday and apparently they saw him and he was alright."

"He is _not _alright and he won't be until he accepts the imprint," Emily insisted vehemently. "Lord. I wanted him to find out, but this is getting out of hand. He should be _happy _about this!"

I was getting tired of having this same discussion over and over. "Well he's not so yea."

Emily made some kind of worried noise that seemed to come naturally to moms. "Why don't you come stay with us for the rest of the week while Riley's gone? I'll make breakfast for dinner like you like and it'll be safer here."

"Irina's place is perfectly safe. Her dad has a gun I think."

"That's not what I meant Claire," she explained seriously, "Didn't you hear about the vampire sightings near the borders of the rez?"

I ignored the lame heart flutter I always seemed to feel when we discussed our blood-sucking enemies. "Jake said something about a vampire thing, but I thought it wasn't a big deal?"

"It's not…at least not yet. You just need to be careful."

"I am. And yea maybe I'll come by tomorrow or something," I told her, already wondering if Quil would possibly be around then. After a few more minutes, Emily and I said our goodbyes and I settled in for the night. Unfortunately my dreams were of vampires trying to kill me, but they were still an improvement from my Quil rejection scenarios.

_That's kind of messed up, huh?_

The next day I got out of school and let Irina's mom drive me back to my place. It was already turning into a wet, chilly day as the rain continued to steadily beat down on the roof of our little house and I pulled on an oversized sweatshirt to keep warm.

_Of course it's one of Quil's old ones. Damn him, he's everywhere._

I thought about changing for about half a second before deciding that a third of my wardrobe consisted of Quil's old stuff and I would be steadily out of clothes if I went that route.

_Guess I can call Emily and see if she still wants me to come over…_

I knew the answer to that would be an enthusiastic 'yes', but couldn't help hoping she would let me chill alone for a while. Glancing around, I looked for my cellphone and froze when I realized it wasn't in the pocket of my jacket where I'd left it.

"Shit!" I cursed loudly before beginning a frantic rummage through my bedroom and eventually the other rooms of the house. I thought back to the car ride where I had answered a text message from Seth so I definitely had it then.

_Maybe it fell out of my pocket onto the seat?_

It was the most likely option and unfortunately I didn't have a home phone or Riley here to call Irina and ask her to check. Acting impulsively, I pulled the hood of the sweatshirt over my head and slipped on some shoes before running out the front door into the rain.

_Ugh it's cold. _

For a second I thought about walking all the way to Irina's, but realized it would be much smarter just to walk the short way to Sam and Emily's and figure things out from there. I headed toward the path that leads through the woods only to pause after walking a few feet in.

Emily's warning about vampire sightings as well as my last experience trekking alone through the forest was enough to convince me to use the more exposed route along the road. Turning around abruptly, I hastened across our yard and up the drive until I could walk on the grassy border area.

_Just hurry up and get there. It's not far._

I tucked my head down in an effort to keep the rain out of my eyes and walked forward as fast as I could without losing my footing on the slippery grass. Hearing a vehicle approaching from behind, I moved away from the road in order to avoid any spray from the tires and waited for them to pass by.

Only they didn't.

_What the…?_

A very familiar black truck slowed down to a stop until it was in front of me on the roadside. I would know that truck anywhere…it was Quil's. I froze in surprise for a moment before deciding to walk over to the passenger side door and open it.

"Quil?" I mumbled, staring up at him.

"Get in," he instructed in a tight voice. He seemed aggravated, but I was too wet and cold to turn down a ride even if it would be awkward as hell.

"Can you take me to Emily's?"

Quil glanced over at me. "What the hell are you doing walking alone like that? It's raining outside."

I shrugged, cataloguing the dark circles under his eyes and the slight stubble on his chin. Was this separation as hard on him as it was on me?

"It's not a big deal. I won't die from a little rain."

Quil's hands clenched the steering wheel. "Did you forget that there are bloodsuckers running around out there? It could have been…"

He trailed off, gritting his teeth to prevent himself from saying more.

"I heard they've got it under control for the most part. None of them have been on the Rez at all."

"That doesn't mean it's safe."

I sighed, turning away from him to watch the rain fall steadily against the window. Why did he bother worrying about me now? He didn't seem to want anything to do with me.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, still facing the window. I couldn't bear to look at him, but I hoped he understood I wasn't just apologizing for being careless. The apology applied to everything I had done to him by lying.

I heard his weary intake of breath. "Just don't…don't walk alone right now. You need to be careful."

"Okay."

I chanced a peek over at him and our eyes met for a brief moment before he looked back to the road. Maybe now was the time to try to talk to him about the imprint again? I had him alone for the first time in days…

"Quil…" I began cautiously, softly. I could feel his eyes on me again. "I um…I want to—"

A loud ringing sound interrupted me before I could go any further and Quil looked away to grab his phone out of the cup holder.

_Figures._

"Hey," Quil breathed absentmindedly. I watched his face, noticing how his expression grew darker as he listened to whoever was on the other end.

"Yea, I actually have Claire with me. I'll take her over there," Quil told the caller. "You too. Bye."

Dropping his phone back into its spot, Quil finally shifted his attention over to me. I immediately tensed under his serious stare, but couldn't look away. Something was obviously wrong.

"What is it?" I asked, hating the suspense.

"Vampires, Claire…they're in La Push."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Hey! I'm not dead after all :) It's only been like...uh 5 months? But whose counting right?! Seriously though, I feel terrible about making you guys wait so long for an update and I'm glad I was able to get something out. I am so thankful for everyone who reviewed (especially the ones who kept prompting me with 'UPDATE!' haha)...it really motivated me to come back and make some time to write. I hope some of you guys have stuck with me and I'll try to get this story finished up in a more timely manner. An I know some people were actually concerned about me due to my absence (ya'll are so sweet!), but everything is fine! I'm just really busy with school and starting an internship in a big city wooh! Excuses, I know ;) Hope all of you guys are having a great Memorial Day Weekend if you're in the US and just an amazing regular weekend if you're elsewhere! XOXOX times a million! <strong>


	24. Can't Stop

**Chapter 24**

I don't want to live without you  
>I can live without you half the day, heeeay hey<br>I don't want to live without you  
>And put life off for another day<br>-_Can't Stop _by OneRepublic

I was having trouble breathing.

It was if an invisible hand was clutched around my throat, constricting airflow to barely half the amount needed to provide an adequate breath. Thankfully Quil hadn't noticed yet; he was too preoccupied scanning the road for signs of vampires and driving as quickly as possible to Sam and Emily's house.

_Vampires…_

The word sent a fresh wave of panic through my already nerve-wracked system. It was strange. I never used to react to these kinds of threats this way before, but now I was freaking out. It had to be related to what had happened to Quil and the fear I had felt in that horrible moment when I thought he was dead.

_Don't think about that! _

Flashbacks of that life-changing day filled my mind and I closed my eyes, trying to focus on something other than vampires, fighting, and Quil getting hurt.

"Claire?" Quil's deep voice caused my eyes to snap open. "Are you okay?"

I glanced over at his concerned face and managed to nod, albeit rather stiffly. It was embarrassing how panicked I was feeling and I didn't really want him to worry about it.

"Are you sure? You don't look right…"

Obviously nonchalance wasn't going to work. I inhaled a shaky breath to prepare to speak.

"I-I'm just worried," I managed to reply somewhat breathlessly. Quil's eyes narrowed in on my face, clearly concerned.

"It's gonna be okay Claire, just calm down okay? Take some deep breaths."

I nodded again and focused on breathing as deeply as possible. I was surprised however, when one of Quil's hands reached over to loosely grip mine, infusing warmth into the coldness of my damp skin. His touch instantly helped to calm me and I could feel my racing heartbeat begin to slow to a more normal pace.

_Seriously, how does he do that?_

Only a minute or so later and we were pulling up to Sam and Emily's familiar house-a sight that filled me with relief.

"See, we made it," Quil spoke softly over to me.

"Thank god," I replied back, finally seeming to find my voice again. For a moment I forgot that things were supposed to be tense between Quil and me and simply enjoyed the feeling of his hand holding mine.

"We should probably go inside…"

The moment ended quickly however as Quil pulled away and hopped out of his truck. I sighed before opening my door and allowing him to hover close by as we walked up to the house.

_Why can't things just work out? _

"Claire, Quil! Thank goodness you're both here."

Emily hugged me tightly as Quil closed the front door behind us.

"Why are you soaked Claire?" Emily asked, frowning as she pulled away. "Go and change into some of your old clothes before you get sick."

I listened to her advice and brushed past Quil who seemed to be avoiding looking at me again. Just fucking great.

"Okay, be back in a minute," I told them over my shoulder and headed toward the hallway that led to the bedrooms. My old room was at the very end of the hall, seemingly left untouched by the Uleys except for some few stray toys that Grayson must have carried in. I grabbed an old t-shirt and some sweatpants that were a little snug for my apparently larger backside and finally changed out of my dripping clothing.

_Much better.  
><em>

"Where's Claire?!"

A slamming door and excited voices alerted me to the arrival of another imprint wife with her children who were apparently asking about me. Tying back my damp hair, I shuffled out of the room into the main living area where almost everyone seemed to be gathered.

"Hey Audrey!" I greeted Paul and Rachel's young daughter, scooping her up into a hug. Her older brother Evan karate chopped my leg at the same time, sending them both into a fit of giggles that belied the tense atmosphere around us.

"C'mon kids," Rachel called them over to the TV after a few moments of silliness. "Eat some snacks with Grayson and watch the movie he picked out."

_Why can't I be a little munchkin oblivious to all this shit?_

The Uley household was bustling with activity as Kim and her two kids joined the group to seek safety from the threat lurking outside. Sam and Quil were the only members of the pack left behind as the others roamed the woods in search of the vampires that had disrupted our peace.

_Speaking of Quil…_

I glanced around, noting his absence in the living room and decided he would likely be in the place wolves loved most: the kitchen. It only took a few short seconds to walk into the brightly lit room that already appeared crowded with just two large men in it. Uncle Sam and Quil were speaking to one another in hushed voices though they paused as soon as they noticed my presence.

"Everything okay guys?" I questioned after a moment of awkward silence.

Sam shrugged while Quil merely stared at me like a deer in the headlights. "As good as things can be with a bunch of vamps running around."

"Sure." I stood there awkwardly for a few long moments and then decided I was over this weird bullshit. "Well sorry if I interrupted something, but I'm hungry. And this is the kitchen soo yea."

I made my way over to the fridge and began rummaging for something tasty although I wasn't feeling very focused. To be honest, I was much more concerned with my kinda-not-sure-if-we're-still-together-boyfriend standing silently behind me.

_How do I freakin fix this?_

Grabbing some shredded cheese and tortillas, I finally turned around to face the guys. "Either of you want a quesadilla?"

"No thanks," Sam responded distractedly. "I'm gonna step outside and phase so I can check-in on the rest of the pack."

"Alright...what about you Quil?"

Quil was staring after Sam's retreating form wistfully and only seemed to notice me once the door closed and Sam was out of sight.

"Yea I guess I'll have one," he muttered after a moment's deliberation. I watched him take a seat at the table while I began making the food, wondering why he seemed so despondent.

_It can't just be about the imprint stuff, right?_

"So any idea what's going on out there?"

I glanced back at Quil who was staring at a spot on the table, seemingly lost in his thoughts.

"No, not really."

"Well why do you look so damn depressed then?"

Quil's eyes finally rose to meet mine and I didn't like what I saw there. "You don't get it Claire. I'm fucking useless now."

"Useless?" I shot back incredulously. "What the hell does that mean?"

He gave an exasperated huff like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Look around. Where's the rest of the pack? Oh right. They're all out doing their jobs…_protecting the tribe_."

_He wants to be out there fighting. Of course. _

"Yea that's true, they are out there. But you look around too…this is what all the rest of us had to endure while you guys got to be the heroes in this screwed up action movie."

"That's not the same—"

I stopped his interruption immediately. "Yea it is! It's bullshit getting left behind wondering if people you love are getting killed and not being able to do anything about it! Welcome to my world. It fuckin sucks."

Quil gaped at me while I went back to microwaving the quesadillas. I knew I was being kind of harsh, but this self-pity crap wasn't helpful to anyone and honestly, I _wanted_ to yell at him. At least he wasn't ignoring me like he had been.

"Sorry," I heard him murmur quietly, prompting me to turn around.

"For what?"

He shrugged. "I guess I never thought about it that way. You're right…being left behind sucks ass."

We shared a slight smile, but before either of us could speak again, Sam burst through the door.

_Jesus Christ!_

"Well Paul's hurt," he told us brusquely. "Nothing too serious, but he's on his way back here."

I breathed a sigh of relief, though my heart still raced at the thought of someone injured. Rachel was so going to freakout when she heard this.

"What's happening out there?!" Quil demanded, rising from his chair to face Sam. "Do we know what these leeches came for?"

Sam glanced at me briefly though he must have accepted that there was no way I was missing this because he carried on. "It's a nomad group. About six of them: four men, two women. Though two have already been eliminated."

_Six?! Fuckin SIX?!_

Quil looked furious. "What the hell are they doing here?"

"It seems like they had contact with the vampire from before…" Sam looked over at me once again, concern etched across his stern features. "From the _accident_. They apparently knew the one that Quil killed."

_Oh._

The plate that I had been clutching in my hand suddenly clattered to the floor, breaking into pieces noisily. I barely even registered it.

"Shit!" I heard Quil exclaim and suddenly he was by my side. "Are you okay?"

I glanced up at him, trying not to remember the image of his unmoving wolf lying in front of me, the blood across his forehead from that terrible blow.

"S-sorry," I mumbled, bending down to grasp a shard of porcelain. Quil's hand stilled my progress and pulled me up to my feet again.

"Don't," he warned gently. "I'll do it."

I nodded and sidestepped the mess, feeling like a complete idiot. The noise must have been loud enough to be heard throughout the house because Emily appeared in the kitchen a moment later. She surveyed the scene impassively before grabbing a broom and dustpan from beside the fridge.

"What happened?"

I began to speak, but Quil interrupted. "I dropped a plate trying to make food. Sorry."

Emily looked skeptical, but shrugged and handed the supplies to Quil. "Are you alright Claire-bear? You look pale…"

She moved toward me, but Sam blocked her path. "She's fine. Just shaken up…Paul's hurt. He's on his way here."

I heard her gasp in surprise. "Is it bad?"

"No, thankfully," Sam replied, reaching to grab her hand. "But he needs some time for the injuries to heal."

I watched Emily's expression shift into determined-mother mode and soon she was rattling off orders to everyone in preparation for Paul's arrival. My job was to supervise the children back in Grayson's bedroom with Kim while Emily and Rachel got first aid supplies ready and Sam waited out front.

_They seem so used to this._

After a few minutes of entertaining the kids, I heard the front door open and the sound of Rachel worrying over Paul.

"Of course I'm okay you idiot!" She admonished him, though her voice was shaky. "Worry about yourself, not me!"

I chuckled in spite of myself, though the kids were staring at each other with wide eyes.

"It's fine guys," I reassured them and Kim quickly echoed my sentiments. Grabbing some electronic car thing I tried to distract the youngest of the bunch, succeeding for the most part.

"Claire?" I heard my Aunt yell from the living room. "Can you bring us a towel from the linen closet?"

"Sure," I shouted back. "You cool with all the munchkins, Kim?"

She rolled her eyes. "Trust me, I can handle it."

I gave Grayson a pat on the back before pushing myself up to a standing position and leaving the small bedroom. Making sure to close the door behind me, I made my way to the closet at the end of the hallway and grabbed a few oversized towels that had definitely seen better days.

_Wouldn't want to get blood on the nice ones, right?_

"Claire?" My aunt's voice drifted down the hall once more.

"Yea coming!"

I walked until I reached the living room where Rachel, Emily, and Sam were gathered around the couch. Through their cluster of bodies I could make out Paul's large form stretched out across the cushions and as I moved closer, I immediately saw the need for towels.

_So much blood…_

"Clai—oh!" Emily paused in her attempt in summon me once again. "What are you doing just standing there? Give those towels to me."

I held them out to her, but continued to watch the scene in front of me. Rachel was wiping away blood from Paul's forehead, while he grimaced in pain as his numerous cuts undoubtedly began the accelerated healing process. He didn't seem to be in too bad of shape considering how much bleeding had occurred, but Rachel was obviously freaked. That was the natural reaction for imprinted couples, so it wasn't surprising.

_Imprinting. What a frickin mofo. _

As Emily and Rachel tended to Paul's injuries, Sam turned away, apparently satisfied with the progress of things.

"I'm going outside to check-in on the pack again. Let me know if you need me for anything."

He moved toward the front door, but Emily stopped him with a hand on his arm. They exchanged a long, imprint-y look that seemed like they were trying to memorize each other's faces. It was weird to watch and I felt intrusive, yet oddly jealous at the same time.

_I'm not one of them anymore._

Though Sam left a moment later, I was still uncomfortably close to another imprinted couple that while different than Sam and Emily, still reminded me of what I was missing out on with Quil. Rachel's touch may have been tender, but her words toward Paul were quickly becoming reproving and agitated.

"What were you thinking?! You have _two children_! You can't just throw yourself in front of a bunch of vampires like you're sixteen again!"

"I'm fine! You know I wasn't _trying _to get hurt…Jesus woman!"

They continued to gripe at each other like they usually did and I considered heading back to join Kim and the kids where I wouldn't be surrounded by reminders of imprinting.

_Speaking of imprints…_

I sucked in a breath as Quil walked into the room, a slight smile on his face.

"From the sound of things, Paul must be just fine," he announced to no one in particular.

Rachel gave him a glare from over her shoulder. "Don't get me started."

Paul emitted a sound of annoyance that turned into a moan of pain as she pressed on a particularly tender spot on his abdomen.

"Sorry, sorry," Rachel told him frantically. "God Paul why do you have to be so stupid sometimes? You could have been _killed. _And then what would I…I mean how could I…I…"

Paul's expression softened instantly from exasperated to adoring as he witnessed her begin to lose control of her emotions. It was seriously the last straw. I couldn't watch another couple fawn over each other when my own imprint could barely stand to be in the same room with me. Turning away from them, I tried to avoid meeting Quil's eyes and make my exit as swiftly as possible. Too bad he chose that moment to decide he wanted to finally acknowledge me again.

"Any other updates on what's going on out there with the guys?"

I shrugged and tried to side-step him. He didn't let me.

"Wait…what's wrong?" He asked, finally taking notice of the suffering written all over my face.

"Nothing," I lied weakly, feeling horrified as tears began to well up against my will. His eyes scanned my expression for a long beat, but I looked down to avoid giving more away. "I'm just gonna go to my room."

Without giving him a chance to answer, I brushed past him and made a break for the back bedroom whose familiarity would hopefully give me some comfort. I had just began to close the door behind me however, when I felt it push open.

"Claire?" Quil's deep voice drifted over my head. "Please tell me what's wrong…something's obviously bothering you."

_Don't cry. Don't cry. _

He slid into the room soundlessly, closing the door behind him with a soft click. I took in a deep breath and attempted to control the sob I felt rising in my throat.

"Um…" I began in a horrible, choked sounding voice. "I…I'm fine. Really."

"No you're not."

_Don't cry. Don't you fucking cry!_

"Yes I _am_."

On the word 'am' my voice cracked and suddenly the tears were falling Niagra-Falls style down my cheeks. Dear lord.

"Oh Claire," Quil breathed almost inaudibly and then warm arms folded around me and pulled me up against his solid brick wall of a chest. It felt perfect and right and comforting in a way that I needed just at that moment, but something held me back from fully giving into the embrace. I pushed against his arms, prompting him to release me.

_This still isn't right between us._

I shuffled away from him, feeling the pain with each inch of separation, but knowing I had to set things straight. Finally, I faced him.

"You can't just hug me like that," I mumbled, wiping my eyes with the back of my hand. "You can't ignore me and then hug me and then leave me alone with all the other imprints obsessing over each other…it's just confusing…and I can't handle it."

Quil's expression slowly morphed into understanding. "I'm not trying to be confusing—"

"But you are!" I accused with a tone that bordered on hysterical. His eyes widened and I knew I needed to lock my shit down before I ended up bawling again. "Just answer me honestly, okay? Do you hate me or not?"

Quil looked dumbfounded. "_Hate you?_ Are you seriously asking me that?"

"Well yea…you've been avoiding me like I have mad cow disease."

"Is that even contagious?" He quipped as the beginnings of a smile began to take form.

I wrung my hands in nervous anticipation. "I don't know! Just focus on the question please."

The smile that had been creeping up was quickly replaced with a serious gaze that seemed to penetrate deep inside of me. The moment passed however, as Quil sighed and leaned back against the door, breaking our staring contest.

"You know I don't hate you," he told me in a resigned voice. "I don't think it's possible."

_Not possible? _

An unsettling notion filled my thoughts. "You mean because of the…imprint?"

He gave me a strange look before replying. "No, that's not what I meant. What I _meant _is that I care about you too much to ever hate you."

"Then why do you have to avoid me all the time? Can't we just forget about this whole imprint stuff and be okay again?"

"You know it's not that simple…I can't just forget that you're my imprint."

I threw up my hands in frustration, cursing the imprint gods and vampires and everything that seemed determined to ruin my relationship with Quil.

"I'm sorry Quil. I fucked it up, okay? I get it. I'll do whatever you want, just please don't ignore me. I don't think I can deal with that."

"I'm not ignoring you, I've just been thinking a lot about everything."

I regarded him skeptically, hoping he would enlighten me as to how his recent behavior didn't fall under the category of complete avoidance.

"I'm still not thrilled that everyone kept the imprint stuff from me," he muttered, gazing at some point past my face. I tried my best to catch his eye again, but he seemed determined not to look directly at me.

_Why is this so hard? _

"I understand," I began slowly. "Just please…try to get where I was coming from."

"I know. You thought it was for the best."

He seemed so emotionless that any hopes I had of reconciling vanished. I couldn't help it though, I had to ask him. "So are we…I mean…do you not want to date me anymore?"

Quil looked at me funny. "What if I said yes?"

_I'll just die. No big deal. _

I could feel tears welling in my eyes, I was totally crestfallen. "Uh well if that's what you want then…I can't stop you right?"

Quil moved towards me, still with that strange expression. "Really? You would just let it end like that?"

"What do you want me to say Quil?" I shot back at him. "I'm the one who messed up here, okay? I know you deserve to be mad at me!"

"That's the thing…I'm not."

"Not what?"

"Not mad," he explained.

"Oh," I squeaked gracelessly in response. Quil watched me for a second before suddenly beginning to pace throughout the small room.

"That's what's really annoying. The fact that I can't even stay mad at you for more than an hour. And now I don't know if that's because of some imprinting thing or just because you get that sad look on your face that makes me feel like I should be sucker-punched if I don't make things right." He sighed, letting his head fall forward a little. "But what's really the problem is that I don't even care why. It's like not even relevant to me at this point."

"Why?"

"Because I love you," he responded in a rush.

_Oh my god in heaven hallowed be thy name. THIS IS NOT REAL._

It took at least ten seconds for me to reply, but even then it was unintelligible. "You…you….me?"

Quil laughed. "Yea. And that's why I was so upset about the imprint. I didn't want there to be some weird ulterior motive for you to like me…isn't that messed up? _I'm_ the one who imprinted and I'm worried about you being affected by it."

There was a warm, glowing ball of joy bubbling up in my stomach threatening to consume me with happiness, but I had to make sure Quil understood. This wasn't just a superficial connection to me. This was everything.

"It's not like that Quil," I told him in a hushed voice. "I fell in love with you because of who you are, not because something told me to."

Quil froze for a moment, causing a momentary flash of panic to shoot throughout my body.

"What is it?"

He hesitated. "You uh…love me too?"

"Oh," I swallowed thickly. "Well yea. Of course I do."

"Good."

_Good. Great. Amazing. BEST THING IN MY ENTIRE LIFE EVER! _

We grinned at each other for a few moments before I decided I wanted to freakin jump him and launched myself forward into his arms. If he was surprised by my sudden movement, he didn't show it, pulling me fluidly into a warm embrace and kissing me as soon as our faces were close enough.

_I've missed this so much._

Quil set a fevered pace with his lips and I wrapped my arms around his neck, clinging to him for support when my knees began to feel weak. I shivered as his tongue ran over my bottom lip and let out a poorly concealed moan when he began to pull it began his teeth.

_Woahhh. _

There was a new sense of urgency between us that I had never felt before and it was as if we couldn't get close enough. Quil's grip on my waist tightened as he stepped forward, pinning me between the wall and his body, never breaking our kiss for a moment.

_Sexy as hell._

I ran my hands down Quil's chest, marveling over the hard lines that seemed to fit perfectly against my softer body. Before I could reach under his shirt and touch the heated skin that I knew awaited underneath however, a sudden exclamation from the living room interrupted us. We broke apart a bit wide-eyed and breathing heavily.

"We have to stop," Quil told me in a voice laced heavily with regret. "Something must have happened out there."

_Oh yeah…there's a world outside of this room._

"Fine," I mumbled in a voice that sounded way too throaty to be my own. "Let's go then."

I moved to disentangle myself from Quil's arms, but he kept his grip firm around me. Looking up at him in confusion I was surprised to find him staring at me heatedly. It was a look that seemed to say "we'll finish this later," and it made my heart launch into a fluttering fit.

_Fuckkk. _

Leaning forward, he placed a kiss on my jawline and then one near my ear. "Love you," he whispered before pulling away to leave me plastered against the wall like a boneless jellyfish.I managed to compose myself enough to walk with him out into the hall where we could already hear excited voices carrying from the other end of the house. We entered the living room holding hands, but no one seemed to notice as their attention was focused on Seth. He looked a little worse for the wear with a split lip and a bloody shirt, but he was grinning in a way that immediately raised my spirits.

"What's going on?" I shouted over the noisy chatter of the rest of my family, causing Seth to turn toward the sound of my voice.

"Claire-bear!" He exclaimed happily. "We got 'em! Everyone's safe now."

I let out an excited squeal while Quil did some bro-hug thing with Seth and then Sam. The vamps were gone and we hadn't lost anyone.

_Thank God._

I glanced over at Quil talking animatedly to Seth and felt a rush of affection for him. If this was life without imprinting, I might just be okay with it…

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Um yea. I know. I kinda suck. I doubt everyone has stuck around waiting for me to get my shit together and actually write something again, but hey, if you have I am super happy to have you as a reader! :) And thanks a ton. I doubt you want to hear my excuses for taking such a long break, but needless to say I am doing fine and have a lot of great stuff going on in my life right now. I got a REAL JOB in another new city yayyy :D Thanks for all the concerned reviewsmsgs...you guys are way too sweet and nice to me. But I love it XOXOXO Take care!**


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